Can some one do a reading for me? Really appreciate it!
Me:11/8/81 born in New York 5’7 athletic/slim brown hair (really auburn but I dye it) bangs and long hair. I have green eyes and tan, very well educated, MBA and professional certificates and love to read and animals. Him: 5/31/80 5’9 (says he is 5’10) light hair pale skin light blue eyes, clean shaven, in shape.
We had a great relationship we met online and we dated for about a year. Things were really good and really serious. I am not one who likes people easily and I never really get into relationships, I hate spending too much time with someone and I get bored easily. He is the first person that I always wanted to talk to and always wanted to be around. At first I had my wall up and he pushed for us to get more and more serious. We would speak literally all day from 730 am till we went to bed and we spent like between 3-6 days a week together. He talked about the future together asked me to move in with him etc.I know he has always shad bad relationships, romantic( he was engaged and he used him and cheated on him), friends( he doesn’t have many and they talk badly about him and he use to get beat up a lot) and his family( mom lied to him about his real father and his step father beat him, his brother won’t talk to him but the ex fiancé he will and his cousin stills from him). He would always want to see me, inviting me to family holidays, he is the first guy I ever took to my family holidays etc. Even though he would tell me how much I meant to him and how amazing I was he would never Say “I love you” he would always say I in a roundabout way. Finally after about 11 months we got into a big fight I broke up with him and I was ok with it, the next day he called me telling me he was sick bout it and he knew he took me for granted and how he doesn’t want to lose me, we got back together that day and that weekend he told me he was in love with me, four days later he broke up with me. I never have been connected to someone like this or had these feelings, I do truly believe he loves me (I never believed a guy before but I do with him, just feel he is scared and confused). A few days after the break up His “best friend asked me to meet her and she spoke so poorly of him and basically said she didn’t even like him as a friends and that he was seeing things and getting drunk every night and he would talk about me and say how much he missed me but she didn’t think he wanted to get back with me. Instead of being angry with him for hurting me my heart broke because I realized how alone he really is and how much he needs someone. I care about him unconditionally and I reached out. He said he would meet me; I just wanted to let him know that he had someone that truly cared about him. The day were suppose to meet he canceled on me( I think because when we broke up it was over the phone and he knew if he saw me we wouldn’t be broken up, also I am the only person who will tell him when he is being irrational about things in his life). I felt really disrespected at the moment and we got into an argument and we both said some pretty mean things. I have never been that childish or cared about someone so unconditionally. I feel horrible about how we left off and I want to apologize. Many psychics have told me .he is the "one" or that he is my soul mate and this is a challenge for us to overcome because he is scared, damaged and there is negativity surrounding us, they all wanted a lot of money to do cleansings and I just wanted to make sure that this is the right thing for me or if I should move on? Should I e-mail him an apology, does he love me or am I just off with my feelings, is he the one for me, should I give up or keep trying? Any reading or advice would be appreciated, usually I would just let go and move on like in the past but for some reason with this guy I can’t, It has been 3 months since the break up and I am still not over it , I think about him every day. Thanks
I am being guided to give you the following message: there is a need to settle the emotional dust that prevents the stream of Life from flowing in a productive manner. You are being prepared for a fruitful new beginning, one that starts with with sacred tears. When we journey through life denying ourselves of emotional cleansing, we grow numb to the possibility of change. We stop looking for opportunity and signs of new growth. When honored, our tears hold the power to strengthen us and deepen our sense of self worth.
You are being encouraged to embrace your tears and to see them as a chance to rid yourself of an emotional, physical, and spiritual burden. Through this you will be able to recharge your batteries and reclaim a sense of balance.
The question is not about whether this man loves you, nor whether there is a need for apology. In a way, these are incidental.
By releasing pent up emotion, you will give your self fertile new ground on which to start again.
You may like to affirm: " I honor the sacred cleansing of my emotions because every day in every way I am getting better and better. "
Blessings of peace on your journey.
That affirmation is supposed to read:
You may like to affirm: " I honor the sacred cleansing of my emotions because every day and in every way I am getting better and better. "
Hi, You know, we really have to be able to listen to what the other person is telling us. Clearly, ya'll established a friendship. But at some point, you established feelings of love and he was totally ambiguous on this point. I think you did the right thing in breaking it off. He didn't do the right thing in getting back together. He didn't want to lose you but didn't want to commit either. I know this sounds like a rendition but that is my perspective.
You knew where this was going. Follow your instincts. A good cry is the best remedy for me. It does help the body to heal. Try to find someone that's into a serious relationship and is mature enough. Maybe a marriageminded website.
thank you all
Than k you Dalia, I AM having a hard time allowing my self to cry over him and fully allow my self too cleanse my self from the pain and hurt he me. Do you have any suggestions that I could try? I a very knew to thns and have never expereinced anything i have been going through this time around...I a usully over it before they leave my house. Thank you so uch for all you advice, my life was hectic for awhile I was bound in bed due to an ankle surgery which was frustrating but is finally almost over and I finally got out of a job that was making physically sick so I can now focus on getting my relationship part back on track in one way or another!
I've been single for 14 years now. I've run the entire gamut of aligning myself with drunks and other interesting character defects...I'm in recovery so I attract that still. In 14 years, I've worked on me, and I've dated and loved and lost relationships for reasons that mostly have to do with me. Going slow, being balanced, and being inquisitive are the best way to go for me. If a man can't share his secrets after a long time, then it's probably best to move on.
Too many walls built up and no matter how much I think I can help, really, the other person has to want it. In this world, there are a lot of men and women who have been badly mis-used and it's a tragedy. We all have to come to terms with that mis-use.
In my case, I've grown in my spirit. I'm more balanced and am able to sustain the type of relationship that I want. I can go slow, I can inquire and I can jettison, albeit with difficulty still, relationships that won't suit long term. It means knowing exactly what I want. That means, no wall building for me. It means being VERY open to all experience and trusting Spirit/ God to put people in my path to help me on the journey.
In the end, the one thing I've learned is that I'm done grieving a relationship when I'm done-there is no time limit. My ex-husband of 11 months-- I grieved over for nearly 5 years ( I had a lot of growth in that time). My ex-fiance from a couple years ago--took me about a year. This allows me to grieve properly, see both parts in the relationship, figure out what was right and not right for me. I don't inflict myself on someone else either with all my baggage.
I came to a cross roads again just recently. I saw my man clearly in the beginning and knew the risks that I took. I gave freely and with compassion. I was clear and upfront that I wanted marriage long term. In the end, he's keeping secrets behind his walls of abuse and incest from childhood and his drinking. He's a wonderful, intelligent man whom I love very much and I would dearly love to be of assistance to his recovery. For now, we just don't want the same things.
He too finds it hard to say that he loves me, but it's the small things he does that show that. It took a great deal of self-confidence building to not sweat that. He has never said that he wanted marriage, but he doesn't want to be abandoned and alone. Those things don't go well together in my opinion. As to his disease of alcoholism, I'm a double winner in AA and Al-Anon and have learned to talk to him about the things that go badly when he drinks--new stuff for me.
I split from him a couple of weeks ago knowing that it would be hardest for him. In fact, I received a text message from him indicating that he's sent me a letter, which I've not yet received. I'm willing to work through the process with him, but I am keeping to strong boundaries. The first one is that he doesn't call me unless he sends flowers first-hence the letter I suppose!
To sum it all up, keep your chin up, cleanse your heart first, understand what you did right and what needs to be changed in your behavior. If we act appropriate to our desires, they will be fulfilled. In the meantime, for each relationship that doesn't work out, it's just Spirit / God preparing you for the right one. "The one" may not always be the right one if they are so closed off that they can't pull up. In your case, I'd say to reflect on his background and see where his fears lie (check your lay out for those swords).
In the meantime, you can entertain yourself and fulfill your own growth by doing daily layouts on your path and learn the tarot very well so you can do your own readings with a clear head!
While I wouldn't take the food away from psychics, I'd say it's time to rely on your own intuition. Understand the things that others do that make your blood pressure change, your gut feel uncomfortable or makes those bells ring in your head and the things that are red flags! Really get to know what you want and how to get there.
I agree with SmartestBlonde. My own experiences have taught me over & over that I would have avoided disappointment, emotional pain & the difficulty of letting go If I'd listened to my instincts. There have been times I chose to ignore the red flags/gut feelings that a situation isn't quite right but I wanted it to be different so I followed a path that eventually came to a end or no longer felt positive & fulfilling. Its happened with jobs, friendships & most certainly with men in my life. I know its hard to let go, but I've experienced that once you achieve it, you'll feel a breathe of fresh air & begin to move forward again. I like the affirmation Aliyah wrote you....I'm trying it myself.
Wishing you inner peace