Hi all yet again,
As much as I detest being a whinger, here I am laid up with back trouble and have been for three days. I've had to beg off work (again) and am so tired and off kilter I can't believe it.
Work has been very stressful of late with constant accreditation pressure, paperwork and a constant requirement to justify our existence even with most of our 34 beds occupied. We can't
do our jobs without being asked to fill out yet another quiz, yet more paperwork, attend yet another in-service on something, or some other thing which detracts from us actually DOING our jobs.
All I have been capable of these past few days is sleeping, reading and sleeping ... not a bad thing, but gee ...
I am wondering if this is anything to do with ascension, or if I'm plain getting old (God forbid) or simply crumbling under the strain of things?
Any and all insights welcome and appreciated! However I am feeling the pinch of not being much of a help to anyone in return, truth be told
PS: All the sleeping has a plus side though: I'm not smoking anywhere near as much! Yay!!
Yes, more sleep is indeed being required of us all at the moment as we adjust to Ascension. Or should I say more rest, which may be different to sleep (if you don't sleep well). It is an exhausting period but the results will be worth it. Nothing good ever comes without a struggle.
If its any help,ive been asking similar questions on the forums,the most recent being addressed to the Captain.Yes more rest is the message coming from our guides I think even though it seems very annoying to us when so much is left to be accomplished.
Be gentle with yourself
Thanks so much, both of you
Captain, when I post up yet another question, or "plea", I don't specifically request the answer from you because it appears you are very busy taking care of about 80+% on here, yet you answer me each and every time, so I appreciate that.
Suramya, you are so right! There is always so much still to do, but I have had to ignore a lot of it and help my partner when he comes home with what I can do, which isn't much. It's like my legs have given out from beneath me and the best position for me to hold is horizontal, with a few stints in between. I can manage to sit at the computer for a few minutes at a time, but not for too long before the pain kicks in again, and I'm required to go and lie down again
I am trying to be gentle with myself, yet I get annoying phone calls from work asking me to work when they know the condition I'm in, and that I'm going to the doctor tomorrow and requesting a scan to see what is going on with my back. (I already am aware I have arthritis in my upper back and part of my spine from a scan I had in 2003, so I want to know what else may be going on lately as injuries seem to be part of my life in recent times.)
If I could, I tell you, I'd quit this job as the stress is really getting to me, but unfortunately I have to pay the bills!
I've read a lot about symptoms of ascension and have wondered if I am going through that, so hence the question.
It is so tiring, isn't it? It's enough to make us all curl up our toes and say "NO". Not to mention, in my own case, the invasion of my privacy and recovery receiving phone calls of this nature. It's like I need to break a bone before they'll leave me alone ... grrrrr.
I say the same back to you both: Be well and thank you!
You are also being shown the lesson of delegating, rather than trying to do everything yourself. Being indispensable doesn't make you more lovable, just more stressed.
Yessss ... I do believe I've managed to wear myself out and for what? I can't remember the last time I truly felt joy or relaxed properly except the last couple of days when I've lain in bed reading a book with my wheat bag firmly pressed up against my aching back ...
Best wishes for your scan
Thanks suramya and Captain. Will see what the scan shows. Back is better today, but am still struggling a bit. Any improvement is welcome though!
Which part of your back troubles you most, Moon? Healer Louise Hay believes that all physical illness has an emotional source.
Back (upper): Lack of emotional support, or feeling unloved.
AFFIRMATION: I love and approve of myself. Life supports and loves me.
BACK (middle): Guilt. Stuck in all that stuff back there or 'Get off my back'.
AFFIRMATION: I release the past. I am free to move forward with love in my heart.
BACK (lower): Financial woes and concerns.
AFFIRMATION: I trust the process of life. All I need is taken care of. I am safe.
We must work in similar fields...paperwork, paperwork and more paperwork, beds must be kept full to keep the money and keep everyone employed. i worked in that environment for three years and when i left that area of the dpt. i could barely stand getting up and going to work. I am not in another area and dealing wiht other issues and its still bad.. so take it easy and let others carry their own load. take care of your body its the only one you have! Many healing blessings are being sent your way!
Captain, it's my lower back and don't the money issues make fine sense here I must keep affirming that until I BELIEVE it ..
Living, working in Aged Care, or any government run concern will bring the same set of problems now I think. I found similar issues working with home based care years ago. The paperwork is driving me NUTS more than it otherwise might because I got out from behind the desk in 2003 and feel like I should've stayed there! It makes it so hard to do the job you're employed to do, but the idiots who insist on this ticking of boxes (as I call it) aren't the ones who actually work in that area. Even our boss gets annoyed by it all, but our hands are tied sadly (tied to bloody pens more like!) Ah well ...
Moon, I am picking up from you a fear of success - that you have the ability to do so much better for yourself, but you fear leaving all your friends and family and lovers behind in your wake (in case they can't keep up). But holding yourself back just because others are slower on the uptake will only frustrate and limit you. Be a fine example of success for others who may be struggling and are doubtful that it can be done.
That could be right ... haven't thought I was afraid of success, as such, but that smacks of sense somewheres ...
Gee, you know, I just had a childhood/teenage memory come back where I was always called teacher's pet because I got straight A's. I struck a lot of nastiness (bordering on bullying) in high school, and in Year 9, I closed down and only scored B's. But my sister was an epileptic and the issues I was suffering at the time were swept under the carpet ...
So you learnt that doing your best only got you into trouble and didn't earn you any good attention or love?
It appears so, recalling that memory!
And as some parents did back then, they took it as a personal slap in the face and how would they tell their friends sort of thing
So you may have been settling for less than you deserve or can achieve after such experiences...
There's every chance of that! They wanted me to go to Uni and become a Vet, but by the time Year 10 was nearly up, I was bent on leaving school, getting a job and becoming independent, although I didn't move out of home until I was 19 (after my car got nicked and I had no way of getting AWAY)
So start aiming higher!