THANK YOU & update; Capt, Blmoon, MissBeth, LOAP etc.
To Captain, Blmoon, Shaubby, MissbethsAngels, MyJourney, RCDreamer, PisceanHealer & Living On A Prayer (every time I hear hear Bon Jovi I think of you & smile);
I just wanted to tell all of you THANK YOU again for all your advice you gave me last year & to update you on my son. Here's the original post from 6/2/11 as a refresher http://www.tarot.com/forum/topic.php?id=14232&replies=11 I've stayed away from the forum for awhile because I was spending so much time looking here versus working on the stuff I knew I needed to work on for myself & my family. I did check up on everyone from time to time but I had to set a timer.
My son finished his Jr year at St. Michael's & as most of you warned it was much tougher than he thought it would be. We all knew he couldn’t just switch schools & all would be good, sort of running away from the bad. He found out very soon it wasn't so easy & he had to work SO much harder than expected- he has learned a much BIGGER lesson. Football was good & he had to work hard to get a starting position, again he just thought it's be a given because he’s such a big guy but it wasn't. That was a good thing, he grew through this. ALL the coaches were encouraging on a spiritual & "guy" level. He had surgery on his shoulder at Christmas & has recovered nicely. One things I’ve discovered about my son is he's more afraid of getting hurt than the actual hurt. Physical therapy was a challenge but it's nice to learn more about your child. Strengths & weaknesses you know.
This really was a good move for him, he was able to find some balance in a much better environment for him, he felt "safer" & has grown & matured. Mostly through the lessons of it not being so easy yet he pushed through, of course not all the time. He joined a few clubs & was asked to be in the Senior Leadership Counsel for this year. There's still some uncomfortable-ness about things yet I firmly believe it's just life. I'm not as worried about him feeling "solidified"; he feels stronger, at least to me. Hardly any nightmares, he even slept in the guest room where all of his nightmares took place - this was a big deal. Again THANK YOU to all of you who gave me advice & encouragement last year.
Also, Captain I took you advice and worked on me more & did some counseling. Lots of things uncovered, trust me nothing hideous but some things I didn't realize that were destabilizing to me. LOTS of OMG moments. Lots of understanding about myself worth-very enlightening. Stuff about my mom & my parent’s divorce. I discovered some things between my husband & me, how we communicate-or how he doesn't so much & why. I communicate much less now and at a much lower volume-lol. I’ve worked on my relationship w/ my daughter & got some understanding with her & why things were done & why they bother me. Also the guy I’ve referenced before that helped her still hovers but less pull for me. BTW – I’m not medicated but I do drink less now. It’ just an understanding of why I was always looking for boogie-men in the darkness. SUBTERFUGE is my kryptonite & I’ve learned to asses situations better versus jumping to conclusion that someone is trying to hurt me or my family.
I've hopped off the mental gerbil wheel quite a bit & running at a much lower & less erratic vibration. I even did hot yoga for awhile, it's the only thing that shuts off my mind but it became stifling when I kept getting hit w/ solar plexus chakra stuff. Didn't know what that was before but it's enlightening. Meditating is still a chore but I attempt on a regular basis, along with grounding. In the past year I’ve learned about lots of things; Chakras, Tarot & I’m in the process of learning astrology. Gad I’m a Cancer Sun, Virgo rising & Pisces moon w/ 5 planets in water houses-I despise the water yet I live there with all my memories. More peace in the brain = more messages from spirit & the angels. This year I have gotten more bird messages & repeating numbers than I could imagine. I still don’t speak bird or numbers but with less fear I thank them for showing up versus OMG what’s gonna happen? BLmoon you told me to let go of the fear, of course easier said than done-I’m much less fearful now.
Again, I big thank you & hug from me & my family for all the kindness, wisdom & encouragement from so many people I will never meet.
BLESSINGS TO ALL OF YOU!
How nice to hear from you! I got good vibes from your post. Thanks for taking the time to spread some positive gratefulness. And how apropriate that SAINT MICHAEL would be a bit more demanding! Butood way. Blessings! PS--fear is a challage but easier once we allow ourselves not to be perfect and give ourselves permission to trust our gut. Our head gets in the way and the wheels start spinning and before we know it we have analized the sintuation to death--drowning out our inner voice with what ifs. I can be a perfectionist and as a nurturer I can as well get stuck in fearing missing watch over a loved one--the responsability factor. Sometimes you have to let go of the wheel. I got a feeling you get that! Good for you!
I was thinking of you & your dad during football season. I have no idea what he looked like or you for that matter but I pictured him in a dark cap with his hands on his hips or crossed over him with one hand on his chin intently watching his players. I picture you with blondish hair in a white shirt watching your dad coach. That's just my vision when I think of you & your dad. Austin's coach's dad would come to most of the games & we'd hear him yell "hold that line" & that's when your dad was in my thoughts. It's an amazing job to lead young people, I'm sure he touched so many lives while he was here.
I never considered myself a "fearful" person but what I discovered through all this time when I thought I was "taking care" of people or "watching out for us" I was really just being fearful. I had NO idea that's what I was doing. Lots of soul searching & uncovering. What's really hard about doing this is realizing the impact you've had on other peoples lives and I don't mean always in a good way. Last year when I was getting bird & number message you wrote to me "let go of the fear & know I am surround by my angels". I remember reading it & my initial thought was "ok I'm grateful for their prescense but why are they here? What or who are they trying to warn me about?" Hahaha. Now it makes sense as to why this was my first thought. Much less fear now because I understand where it came from. The "wound" so to speak, the thing that threw me off balance. Then as life went on it got worse, especially when there really was some bad that happened. I'm just grateful I kept listening & looking. I'm grateful for words of wisdom & guidance from strangers like you & the others here. What I've discovered is there are words & phrases that stick with me & makes me ponder the thought, then I look at it deeper & that's when I get a ping of understanding. Your comment was one of those pings for me
I get bombarded by repeating numbers, my guides wake me up in the middle of the night to show me the clock, 3:33 is very common. I now just smile, say thanks for being there & roll over & go back to sleep. Before I would've gotten up & googled the crap out of "333". In November I even had 2 owl encounters within a 4 day time frame, one flew into my car. It was stunned & I wrapped it up & within a few minutes it flew away. Still kind of curious about that but I'm sure my guides will keep talking to me until I completely understand the message. Earlier that day I got 3 Wizard of Oz references then 30 minutes later the owl flew into my car. The WOOz has been a constant since then as well. I'm sure they're telling me "I have everything I need to find my way".
Also earlier this year I found out my grandmother's sister was a witch (not kidding) & they collected owls when they were young; it was their guardian. Her sister started dabbling in the dark stuff & the family didn't approve so there was a skism but not sure the entire story. I do know she died in a fire, she fell asleep smoking in bed. It's interesting what you find out about your childhood & family when you really start asking questions ya know.
Thanks again & know your words made an impact in a positive way. Blessings
You sound like you are thriving - good for you, you did the work!
It's funny but I started this to say thanks to everyone & give an update on my son because things kick-off this week for foortball which is the beginning of their school year, his senior year. Then I went on to talk about me, I probably should've done a seperate thread for that. I did say I talk less now-maybe not lol.
Shift's in thinking & behavior effect everyone, especially the ones closest to you like family. It's work to stay out of the "pit" but life is much lighter & I think we are all thiving, including my son. Thank you again for the push you gave me to look a little deeper.
Blessings from Texas
What a nice follow up message, thanks for the updates. I am so glad we were able to play a positive part in all that has happened. It's great that your son is doing well and try as might to ignore it we all seem to learn from those times when we feel the most frustrated or discouraged. Growth is an amazing thing and being a witness to it must make you feel wonderful, not the going through the process part so much as seeing the change over all in your son, your daughter, your relationship and yourself. Way to go for allowing the info to come your way, not let it overwhelm you and taking from it the bits and pieces that were stepping stones to where you are today. I will long remember your first post, I'll never forget the closed feeling I had in my throat as I read your words. Listening to people like you who came with such concern and were able to walk away not only more informed but more aware is a really cool thing to share in so thank you for allowing us to reach out with our impressions.
I wish you all the best and will keep an eye out for further posts. Be well, all of you.
Yes Kookish, but at least you are now aware of when you switch to talking about yourself whereas in the past you never noticed. That is great progress! Unless we become aware of negative behaviour, we cannot heal it.