The Debate Room

  • Why is it hard to pass up a plate of brownies when you know you are diabetic? Why is it hard to take that walk when you know you are out of shape and need it? Why is it hard to let your children make their own dumb mistake when you want so much to save them from hurt? Nothing worth truely earning for goodness sake comes EASY.

  • well amused i hear u on that one. i myself am facing n loads involved still. i guess reason its hard is bc one truely loved that person, n i t IS hard to say ure no good 4 me anymore no good at all.

    to blmoon

    as 4 passon on cakes when ya is diabetic is tough n sucks, either u get used to it or they catch on, OR u start finding recipes for cakes diabtics can eat, such do exists.

    as for the excersize, OUCH yes i know, ive neglected myself due to heartache for oh small 3 weeks, BUT i came around saying even if i am low i wont let that EFF fuck up my health so get a move on. Im back in game its hard but its good as well. i look forward to the strain, the sweating , aching n the fresh air. AND ABOVE ALL the FEELING OF JOB WELL DONE LOL

    as for letting go it is i guess a circle of life, they have to make their own experience, only way they learn. if u told them this n that could happen they prolly wouldnt believe u., but i hear ya.

    nothing comes easy i agree on that not even love.

    can any of you reply the following:

    1. why do people lead other people on, let them hang in air like the hanged person?

    2. why do men lead women on that they have no bloody intention of doing anything with except bask in their words getting high on words meant, yet they keep these women hanging?

    3. why do men like when everyone know the truth? whats to gain from it?

    4. why do they then haul u back in after having shunned u?

    charmed in a puzzleeffmode

  • Men are just egotisitcal aholes they love the thrill of the chase they chew us up and and then spit us out .

  • seems ive heard the bigger their balls the bigger they r effs! fits yes!

  • I think many men are really manchilds....a child in a man's body & are either emotionally immature or emotionally unavailable. Women often see the man's potential to be a great guy but he hasn't evolved to that person yet.......I guess some never do. It just takes time to meet the one that is ready for us when we're ready for them. Some people just get under your skin & its soo hard to let go...I've seen this with my friends who are in same sex relationships too.

    Bloom I agree it is hard to do the right thing in many other areas too like monitoring certain food, drinks...I do love a draft beer, exercise & to watch my sons on their journey & travel those bumps in the road is torturous at times

    Charmed- lying is the easy way out vs take responsibility for actions

    Men circle back around sometimes cuz they know they left a good woman & want her back, or they're between woman & want company or they like to keep a woman on the back burner incase.....its hard but best to listen to your intuition if he's sincere......I for one will be a better listener to my intuition cuz when I don't I'm sorry later

  • Sorry Blmoon about spelling your name wrong ,I'm not wearing my glasses & the lesson learned I can't type well w out them!


    You are going to hate this answer but no one can betray you unless you betray yourself first. It's a spiritual rite of passage to get that one. You can't see it until your past it though. There are red flags and signals we ignore because we NEED to believe it is what it isn't. We give the message we can be had--lied to--that we will turn our heads to keep what we need true. We are not victims. Maybe once but you have to see your part in why that person ever assumed their behavoure would be acceptable. We betray ourselves when we do not balance head and heart--all you say about certein men is true and that's how the head sees it but the heart can decide its not that way at all and shut the head up--too much heart betrays you--too much head betrays you--find the balance. Men who manipulate can only do that through your fear or need. Your weakness betrays you. Take your power back and step back and be honest about how many signs you ignored before the big one smacked you big time. We have ALL been there! Forget figuring out their heads---feed your own! BLESSINGS!

  • I am so over my husband , and relationships do you guys think i am strange ?

  • Living : no not at all. never!

    blmoon: in this instance mayb ure right BUT also not right. THose like me who has been bullied know its not fully true either. BUT thats a whole other debate

    funny when u post a thread asking for help from the place u urself have helped out for so long n so many times ure suddenly ignore overseen like one suddenly has gotten a bad case of leparcy or the bubonic plague. 4 shame i say. how do u experience this sudden leparcy bunbonic plague???

  • Charmed, I would gladly answer your thread but I don't read cards or have the sight to do so.

    LivingonaPrayer, Each of us has a journey to travel & it's not my place to judge others. I must admit there were times when I was married I felt the same way.



  • Thanks for your thoughts Guys on how i feel

  • Hi Living love,

    No, not strange at all.

    There are many reasons why a flame dies down to a bare flicker that isn't even recognizable.

    When we grow a world apart from someone in a relationship, often it is because the needs of our soul have beyond the relationship and the significant other isn't willing to grow with us any longer, or love and nurture our soul as we do theirs.

    They may be self-consumed in their own world.

    Sooner or later we find that we have much more love to offer to the world and people around us.

    I would encourage you to discover why you feel the way you do, and also to make sure that there is not an outside force pulling you downward into a spiral of depression.

    We all , when opening our hearts and spirit must be ever so watchful that a negative energy isn't attaching itself to us. negative energy was ex husband's energy sucking emotional vampire

    They are out there....both seen and unseen.

    I have missed being here, have missed you..had a wonderful two week vacation up North and have been working long long days.

    I have a friend who is quite happy being single and free from the anxiety tethers of a relationship.she's in her 50s and quite content.

    My sister in her late 50's broke away from a draining relationship she was involved with for years...and woke up one day and thought...WHAT am I doing??????

    lol..she has spent the last 3 rediscovering herself. And having a blast.

    Nothing wrong with it at all....

    Much love to you Living, and Blmoon, Charmed, and all.


  • Good 2 see u again Patchy. U have been sorely missed.

    I know all about getting focussed on things that aint internet relevant LOL

    OH im SOOOOO glad it is weekend. Cant wait to SLEEP IN, relax n take it EASY.

    I survived the week HAHAHAHAAHAHAh


  • I have been married 41 years and can tell you it evolves and changes. Just like we do! Sometimes you are the same page sometimes on a diverent planet. Marriage is work. It's best not to compare or have expectations according to some rule as relationships sometimes serve only a part of one's journey sometimes. Everyone has their own unique path. Generaly, long term hauls with the same person can see many peaks and valleys. There will be times when you want a divorce and will go your own path and there will be times when you are together. You are not so much as ONE as fairytales would suggest. We each have our own healing and challanges and personal dreams--sometimes as a couple we are in sync--other times not. It's a long and winding road!

  • Blmoon, I was married for just shy of 25 yrs when my husband died. I agree 100% with what you say. Relationships in marriage can be awesome but definitely work & not always the same stable journey. So many variables each person experiences. The challenge is to be able to communicate & support each other as you follow your own individual journey as well as the journey as a couple.

  • as it says

  • And a divinely prosperouse NEW YEAR! Abundance for everyone!!! We are blessed!

  • ladies n gents tis is 4 ya all. n BlMoon: LIKEWISE DARLING!

  • My first marriage was a road impossible to share

    it takes two

    on an even keel

    not 1

    lording the marriage over as his mastery of human flesh and the family as his will to do with as he pleased in selfish plunder of anger

    I now have a true marriage....and could not be happier...I am truly blessed

    adjustments are par for the course....and it is in growing together through the valleys that the bond of love strengthens and melds

    Love to you all

  • LOAP honey, I am so sorry....I just read the Lounge and found out about the loss of your friend. It seems like relationships of any kind have been very difficult for you this last few if there is a dark cloud hanging over you muddling your emotions and messing with your soul.

    I love very much and it pains me to see you going through this.

    Please know that even when I am absent due to circumstance my spirit and thoughts are with you.

    When I lost a dear friend in a fire I when looking back through pictures how unhappy she really was..I could see it in her eyes...she was tired and unhappy and done with hurting in this lifetime. It was so incredibly painful and I missed her and regretted I hadn't been there for her more throughout her life.

    I know that she is much happier where she is now and that this lifetime was to help her reflect and look the same time she is now looking forward.

    I had wind chimes hanging outside my door...and shortly after she had passed I heard them a couple of times playing the exact same tune without variation for longer than what would be if trying to get my attention. I think it was her way of saying she was fine now.

    We love you dear. Please don't forget. Your beautiful soul is cherished here.


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