Hung up on a Virgo
K, so it goes like this. Virgo man (Sept. left his wife because she had an affair. Meets me Gemini (June 16). I work with him and have known him for about 10 years and have ALWAYS been attracted to him. He has been captain oblivious and not picked up on my flirtatiousness. I had to come out and say... HEY I am into you. Things were total AWESOME for 3 months, then wham, he decides he needs his kids and goes back to the wife. Says he doesn't know how he feels about her but his kids need him and he needs to fix his family. Says he REALLY likes me. Not sure what that means. When you really like someone don't you want to be with them? Hmm, I am totally confused. I still have to see him on occasion at work which let me tell you... it is hard!!!! Sometimes when I do see him he acts like I am a total stranger. He never responds to any of my emails, doesn't call, doesn't text. It is really like nothing ever happened, like I don't even exist in his mind. I hear that he is acting as if NOTHING is wrong yet I can't stop thinking of him. It is non stop from the time I wake up till the time I go to bed he is there 24/7! He doesn't seem to be having the same issues. It is like I am not even a second thought to him. What is up!??!
BTW, the attraction I have for him is extremely overwhelming. I only had this feeling once before with a different Virgo and NEVER acted on that one. The guy seemed "odd' to me but the attraction was just crazy.
This Virgo is so darn mysterious and the more I don't know, the more I want to. I am 100% positive that mysteriousness will remain and I must deal with it but what is the deal.... I do have real feeling for this guy and I seem to be absolutely nothing to him. UGH! Kinda feel used.
I am so sorry this happened to you, I have been there and I understand the pain you are in. Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do. He has made his choice and he is being heartless in the way he is handling things...very insensitive, but that is how virgos are...they withdraw and don't communicate when things go wrong. It is obvious he wasn't in love with you, you were a diversion during this time in his life when he was separated. They worked things out, he will probably never leave her. You have to accept this and believe that you were not meant to be with him and someone else is out there for you. Try to meditate, push him out of your mind when he creeps in...above all else, stay busy!! I am not sure he was using you, though I know it feels that way, he is just very insensitive and thinks you can just see him everyday and not have it bother you. Above all you have to quit texting and calling and emailing....erase his number, you are appearing desparate to him and that is so bad!! It took me a year and a half to get over my broken heart...a situation similar to yours but longer term. It was hard but I did it by staying busy, doing a lot of writing, meditating, working out and focusing on finding someone who was free to be with me and deserved to be with me!!
Big hugs and blessings,
Confusing Virgo consider yourself lucky that he is gone back to his wife. You wont
understand now but you will someday.
Thanks for the encouraging words. It is very hard and I REALLY don't want to seem desperate. I have given up in my head, waiting for my heart to catch up. His behavior is just so odd. I have never felt like this before. I have no idea what I was to him, if anything. I find it hard to believe that I was nothing but I just don't know what it was. I think that is the main issue I am having. What was it? Why did it happen? What am I to learn from this? Crazy I tell ya, just plain crazy.
Magickal, Can you give me an idea of what you mean?
I hate to say this because I'm a very positive person but Virgo guys are really very difficult to have
relationship with. They are too slow, a lot frustrations and questions
you are going to have with them plus they are not going to change even if you end up with them. It takes a lot of understanding, patience and love to deal with this sign.
You are in love right now so you cant see right but once you meet somebody thats showing you
the affection you want you will say this "Why in the world did I like that virgo guy?"
I must have been out of my mind.
I agree with Magickal...virgo men are near impossible to be in a relationship with. They seem great in the beginning but almost always turn hostile, unemotional, and detached down the road. They withdraw and won't communicate, plus, getting them to commit is another problem. They can be very arrogant and extremely cold and inconsiderate of your needs. Consider yourself very fortunate that he is back with his wife and move on...you dodged a bullet:)
Hi Confusing Virgo,
Well, I have experienced the silence you are describing and it is so unforgiving and hostile!!! There wasn't any other woman but he still left me. To this day I do not know what happened but I have become a different person, I am happier and more measured and I am more in control of my emotions (or so I'd like to think). I believe after what I have been through that is not that he didn't have feelings for you on the contrary, he does. It is just that he has made a decision and if he really wants to give his marriage a fair chance he cannot communicate with you or you know it, it will complicate things...He is a married man. Believe me, you will not be through this again. You will meet a man who will be available to you emotionally. Someone who is separated or even divorced...sometimes it can be years before a person is really available and not hung up on old feelings. You feel things deeply and gave it a chance, he did too, but he is not together like you are...Do things now that repair your heart and your spirit, you will be a completely different person.
"Why in the world did I like that virgo guy?"
I must have been out of my mind.
i sooooooo agree with you magical.... you really hit the nail on the head with that one
Virgos are the most difficult i find next to a Cancer man...UGh!!! too moody and mysterious and unaffectionate...
True Caribchic the silence I described before was from a Cancer man But Virgos are hard to figure out. For me the challenge with him is true physical intimacy, we were fine in the beginning and now he wants to wait, wait, wait until he is ready about certain things...he drives me nuts on that one!
Confusing Virgo, how are you doing? are you feeling better? I hope so, this is a hard time. We are here for you...hope that you have a good weekend.
I even think, Confusing Virgo, that your Virgo guy can/will have attempts to get closer to you again, but you know? that doesn't matter, by then you will be interested in someone else and much happier...
Thanks again. I am doing much better. The thoughts of him are not so "loud". I am finding balance and reasons to smile again. I still see him and reminded of him daily but am progressing. I do believe his choice of staying with his wife will not work in the long term as he is only doing it out of a sense of responsibility. He says, yes he does really like me but he can't leave his wife because of his children. I am 100% certain that when folks say this that is always the children who "pay" for that decision but who am I to say. It is his choice.
He is a Virgo. I do someday want to be with him but am accepting that it will never happen. Have no desire to find anyone at this point. I am happy with where I am in life. He came out of the blue, kinda snuck up on me when I wasn't paying attention. There still is this very unexplained magnetism. That is the hardest to deal with. It is like we are drawn to one another in some odd way. Thanks to all the kind words!
Virgos are very loyal and take responsibility on their kids seriously. They come first before you.
If his financial obligation with his kids are finally over he might come back to you slowly only
when his relationship with his wife is not working anymore.
At this time you cannot have him thats the unexplained magnetism that you feel.
Dont think about him. Just think positive and you will attract a positive person that you will be