Confused and uneasy
not sure if anyone out there even cares about my drama, but i need some outside advice!!!! here goes,,,got away from an abusive man two yrs ago. met someone new,all great except he cant find work therefore we have been jumping from one place to the next always with hopes of finally getting on our feet but just when things start to look up we get knocked back even further. both of us are strong individuals and have persevered throughout the senseless drama we have had to endure along the way. i know youre thinking," what kind if people are you?" but quite honestly i can say that every situation has had to do with insecure people that think they can manipulate one or both of us into something they want. example..jealousies,trying to pit one against the other ,causing unnecessary strife between us because they cant figure out why we can still love eachother everyday eventhough we have nothing. when they appear to have it all yet are miserable.well,that being said 5 months ago a family member offered us a place to stay away from said BS...fyi fam member is lesbian and not fond of opposite sex nonetheless invited US INTO HER HOME.all of a sudden things have crumbled to the point of no return and my man,my other half is being forced to move out,i ,on the other hand being family can stay. the weather here is very hot and i have been having some health issues. anyway what im gettn at is I FEEL LIKE IF HE GOES AND I STAY I HAVE FAILED MISERABLY! i am full blown sag and he is libra can our love handle this upheaval or was it never meant to be from the start? anyone that has any advice pleeeez feel free. or a reading???? i am 12-9-1969 he ia 9-27-1969
This relationship of yours is one-of-a-kind. This relationship is both extremely challenging and extremely fulfilling. Although there is an undeniable tendency for one of you to assume the role of mentor, the focus here is to acquire experience and knowledge within a certain area that can then be put to specific social, financial or artistic use. It is not uncommon to find a teacher/student-like interaction here, but the roles are regularly reversed. Moreover, though autonomy is important to both of you, there is no denying the benefits of your working together in an equal partnership. For either of you to act in a selfish or self-aggrandizing manner runs counter to your own self-interest, since the real benefits of this relationship accrue from the interactions between you.
A love affair or marriage here can be quite stressful. Your partner's perfectionistic and 'control-freak' tendencies may lead him to evaluate you as a trifle sloppy or negligent, while you may come to consider him overly tense, and become alarmed as he tends to vacillate between indecisiveness and leadership, between committing and running away. When the level of physical satisfaction is high enough here, such annoyances can be quickly forgotten - but the two of you should take the time to discuss problems and possible solutions, rather than bounce back and forth between periods of stress and more pleasurable times. There is often a competitive edge to this relationship, which may act as a 'whetstone' to keep you both sharp. However the stubbornness, even defiance, of you as a couple may prevent family members from getting together for some time. Competition inevitably surfaces here too, especially between relatives of the same sex, but experientially both of you can gain from such encounters, no matter how unpleasant they may seem at the time.
Your partner's mental quickness and your high degree of creativity can gel at times and at other times can collide, but obstinancy can lead both of you to continue on rather than abandon the relationship. Try to keep antagonisms under control and remember that two heads are better than one. You are stronger together than apart and you can be very creative and artistic when you combine your strengths. Maybe you can make a career/business out of it? You both like to have your own private space or area to work in and you Hopelesssag especially need some privacy from time to time for the sake of your mental and physical health, so doing 'your own thing' business-wise might be the best solution. You two are going to have to make peace with the 'system' (and with other people) if you are ever going to be financially stable. That's not selling out - you can still be honest and 'pure' in your work, but being an angry rebel won't get either of you anywhere.
You both share the same life goal in that you both want to be right all the time and to have people agree with you. But this can be hard for other people to bear so you two will have to learn to bend a little and accept that you don't always have the right plan or know the right thing to do. Don't let a compulsive need for order or overly rigid physical and material planning be your downfall. You can be very successful if you refocus on the larger, spiritual vision of life and trust that something wiser than you is directing your path if you would only stop and listen.