AstraAngel-My friend too!
nt know for sure what's up with me at the moment, I seem to gone backwards some how, in my emotions feelings.
My colleague has left today, so on one part i pleased has we got on then we didn't, i know im not jealous she got new job,, but it brought on that old feeling of will i ever leave, for another job?
The same time, im annoyed at so many have put down go out for her leaving do and seem gen care about her, yet i cant help thinking why didn't you do that for my birthday?
I always felt bit that, as when her dad died all those time ago, round same time my sister killed herself , she got more concious from other co workers, whom i worked with for years,, i know i was different then.
Yet they moan slag her a bit, but i dont think it meant maliciousness.
I thought i got past this, i should be just happy for her,,
I got some resentment haven't i?
A lot people i work with are not my type as friend/colleagues any way.
Sounds like some work matters you are dealing with... the celebration for your co-worker triggered something I guess. Some hurt back there from others maybe. Can take time to heal.
You said " i did night out thing for my forthwith", ...forthwith, what is that? You did a night out thing for someone else at your office?
SK... "The Fool" so he is trusting in something right now... knight of swords so perhaps he is very focused on something that requires faith and trust that all will go well... Strength... so instinct is now a very large part of this, so there are energies under the surface that could be arranging matters for the two of yu. It sounds nice to me. I would keep your heart opent to him, and maybe soething can still happen ther...
So "SP" still has your feelings, and I can understand why you are having reservations about proceeding with SK... Judgment, so that soundsl ike you are weighing things out. Judgment is also a big phase change in your life. Do you feel like something is happening with you that seems a little dis-orienting? That is a phase change. I have been going thru a phase change for years now... will be nice to see whatever is on the "OTHER" side of the change haha....
Nine of wands seems like you, strong, confidant yes, holding your ground, so you are doing well Scully! I drew the Fool for you too so you may be feeling that there is an area you are needing to trust in just like SK? I feel like I am in the same boat lately, trying to keep believing in a path in spite of my own brand of uncertainty...
Hey scully I am probably not giving you much to go on here... I wish, that something can develop with one of your men!... I could see you, step into a lovely relationship you deserve that. Everyone should have that!
love and blessings...
I did a poster for my forty birthday, no one bothered to put their name down,, I though id let go of things from past, make the best of what i have, no one bothered, so i wont ever again, They all seem to bother about TC?
SP is not ever going to be part my life again, he unemotional manipulative,, and married, took me a long time to get over that, and i guess it is what's made me more cautious towards men.
So they didn't sign your poster? Well you learned something through the experience. THere are reasons we experience what we do... You could take the opposite approach for fun and start making a poster for more occasions ... inundate them with posters haha...
Okay on SP... cautious yes I hear you, that happens... you get burned and you are like, "okay... so I trust and then that happened... so who do I trust now?" So trust is threatened and it can be some effort to be willing to try again. I don't know why it is this way unless there are simply 'experiences' we have to have that prepare us for something real and beautiful later.
I see 2 cups for you Scully so something is still developing that has your name on it, in love.
7 pentacles and Ace Cups so that sounds like KEEP DREAMING your Mulder is still on the case with you haha.... he is in a meeting with Skinner right now is all...
hope your weekend is nice....
You do make me smile, Skinner , well maybe Annabeth Gish is talking to my Mulder as well? maybe he round the corner.
I go by gut feel my first feel that SK, doesn't have enough fire in his belly for me?
I know we have to go through experiences, and we learn from that, (SP) and i know i want friends lovers who want me for me, not just for that The biggest lesson was learn and trust your gut instincts, there telling you the truth.
I wont bother with do more work poster, i carry on get out hope to make like minded friends that way, im sure i will, just some people seem make friends easily, well this all new and im get out to do it.
I guess we have go backwards again sometimes, but i fear i dont want it too happen so close, nothing wrong once in a while, maybe im still learning and get rid the odd emotional history to finally break free of old habit, Do you think i will?
What been going down in your world, have you met anyone, i though you where married?
SK, has organised day out to the movie's,, and it something different,, cartoon film, i ok with that itdifferent.
If and when you got time, would you do me a career/job reading
Love light Scully
Hi Astra my dear,
I think the universe and Angels are listening and have sent me what i ask for to give me something that i feel positive gut feel i doing re career.
I started my course today, it is end of life care.
I have the strongest gut feel this is for me as do voluntary and as possible career change, i feel so positive about that, like i just know it feels right?
I know in my care work, when i have looked after those in that place, i have enjoyed and had so much patience and time, i had forgotten that until today.
Love and Light
"maybe im still learning and get rid the odd emotional history to finally break free of old habit, Do you think i will?"
Queen of wands is very confident and accomplished certainly you will.
"What been going down in your world, have you met anyone, i though you where married?"
I drew the Death card, I will let you interpret that one haha...
"If and when you got time, would you do me a career/job reading
Okay Scully... I guess I can... you did ask politely....
10 of swords
5 of pentacles
7 of swords
7 of wands
After a period of intense mental effort looking at, planning your lifestyle and career, you step into a change of your material life connected with a lot of imagining, dreams of a new role.
So, this sounds like a change of career direction (and you touched on that with the 'end of life care' so maybe that is a new direction? I think the 7's are a lot of dreams on your part related to career, I have the sense that you are constant dreamer about your life work and path? ANd very mentally focused as well so you are serious about your career (and that is important to you, I don't see you being happy with anything that does not fulfill your sense of deep purpose. Your work you really want to believe in. SO your care direction sounds very rewarding to you..
Okay Scully... I saw Promethius (new alien, Ridly Scott movie) and that was cool. Mulder and Scully would have been at home in it there was some x files kinda scenes. I liked the ship it was cool!
love and blessings
One last reading please, it be financial.
I have a debt and card to pay off, i have a gut feel, that in time i will learn to be more responsible and by pay my debt till next yea i will be reel, then i can seriously look for the job i want?
I will be taking a break from here now, i also closed my Facebook..
I drew the Star card which sounds like a bright hope ahead for you.
And the Queen of Cups so that shows you are emotionally strong and have good foundations there. So perhaps being better able to handle the emotional aspects of money, spending and saving will result in your being on top financially and more relaxed (would help your job hunt I am sure too).
And the World so that is another fantastic card for you, all that you need and more, and fulfillment on all the levels that are important to you. All of these togther show very good things ahead fo ryou!
Okay Scully, I should unplug more too,.. been paintnig more and that I can deal with, the elec stuff seems to not work half the time anyway...
So today, im confused by my feelings.
I went out with SK, for drink and go to pictures, so whilst we first meet i just naturally at ease give him a peck on cheek said hi as if we known each other for ages, still done it before,
While we catch up, he tells me that while there was a function going on in his viage, he met a woman, who used go to his school, year lower than him, and she lives right near him, i was like ok, not bursting with oh that's really nice,, again, some other woman he met last year, have contact him, said have drink,, he said she not text him, me just said oh well it only this weekend, next is awhile away,, he said maybe i should texted her, i again not do what i thought i would, in by encouraging him too make first move. Isn't that what friends do,, im not jealous, just bothers me,
He did give me a kiss goodbye, and i can choose what we see next, as his idea was not g8 HAHA.
So im am i just worried i loose friend, or is it more, i so sure i saw him a just friend and visa-versa??
I dont understand, why it so hard for me to make friends, along side people want to be friends with me.
I have been looking at others, they seem to have friends, some still from school day's, even if they catch up later on again, do seem to want to know em. I've be looking back at the past, all the people, i have had have used me in one way or another, so they weren't real friends, or just take the mickey out of me.
I did have friends during school,, but things changed when i was twelve some left and grew out the rest, they got ion with their lives, most my friends where boys anyway.
I have been thinking so much, about it , how many people have friends (the amount) on social network sites, like work colleagues. It been constant and over whelm me, i try get it out opf my head.
I guess this is happening for a reason, i have something to learn from it.
II have been doing so much to better my life, thought i was past this/
What you been up to,,?
Lot happened since last post
As soon as your back people go mad lol,, i do wonder if this puts you a ;ittle pressure for you?
Thats my feel..
I miss you wonder if your ok?/
Hey nice to see you out there. I dunno what sends me off by myself, I love it here. I do these readings and get so emotional sometimes, I guess that is just me though and I should lean to just deal with it. I hope you are doing okay?
If I were an actual therapist with a practice, and had a box of tissues when clients came to see me, I think the tissues would be for me, not them haha....
A Guy with tissues that worth seeing, i think sometimes it better face to face, but then if your inner guide tell who good total to when you need on the net, is that so bad?
I give you a idea, i know for sure that SK, me are just mere aqant i cant see more than that.
I do see someone with salt pepper hair enter my life for a real romantic love later on at some time next year?
Love light Scully
I forgotten how to spell it, i meant acquaintance .