Help With Cancer Male
I offended my Cancer friend last Saturday-actually, I have been struggling through some deep emotional pain, and I have taken it all out on him for a while. It hit the fan Saturday when I called him for a ride home after I had been drinking and was rude to him when he said he couldn't come get me. We argued and he was so angry. He has never gone off on me like that. He threatened to cut me out of his life if I didn't stop being dramatic. He also asked me to stop texting him for the rest of the day-which I did. I haven't heard from him since. Friday morning I sent this apology: I owe you an apology. I have been selfish, demanding, controlling, and judgmental-basically, all the things you spelled out for me Saturday. As hard as they were to hear, I needed desperately to hear them. I've allowed my emotions to drive me-something I never do. The girl you met that you saw something special in is me, but without God I'm this wreck you have been dealing with. I'm so so sorry for the drama and the stress I have caused you. Me and God are working on me. I wish I could tell you I'm healed and whole, but I'm not there yet... I feel like I screwed up something very special between us and I'm convicted deeply for how I have treated you. I will need to take some time for God to heal me and rather than ask you to come along for the bumpy ride it could be, I will ask instead for your forgiveness and a second chance somewhere down the road once I have healed... You stole what was left of my broken heart when I met you that first Sunday for dinner. You are more special to me than you can ever know... I will be thinking of you. Sweet dreams, love....
I have to have time to heal that is for sure, but God I miss him. I just want to know we are okay. I hate for anyone to be upset with me, but especially him. Did I close the door here with my message or is he still thinking things over?... We both went to visit our Mothers this weekend so he wouldn't have contacted me while he was away and couldn't have because I have no cell service at my parents'... Any ideas? I am heart sick that I have taken this wonderful, beautiful man for granted and acted like a child and he will never be a part of my life again. Thanks.