Captain, can you please let me know whats going on with this guy?
Captain, I am so confused with this guy's behavior. Was supposed to meet him a couple days ago, but he couldnt make it. And it happened once already. Am wondering if his work really got in the way? or did he play hard to get? or did he lose interest in meeting me? IF he still wanna meet up, do you feel if we can meet sometime soon? like next week or so? Anything I should know about him please?
mine April 8, 1985
his Oct 1, 1973
Thanks for your input, Captain.
It might be best if you don't pursue a relationship here, depite any physical attraction you might feel. This guy is constantly torn between career advancement and emotional security. He needs to make his mark in the world, yet he also is looking for a nice home and family. It's almost impossible for him to work out what he wants - he will drive you crazy with his indecisveness and procrastination. If he can put off making a decision or taking action, he will. Yet he wll try to present himself as a decisive person. But that will only make things worse as you will quickly expose him as being self-delusional when your expectations aren't met. You for your part will be stung by his criticisms and perfectionism. After all, you just like being what you are (and being admired for it), whereas this man is a born reformer who thinks he can improve anyone and anything. In objective pursuits, your motto is "If it works, don't fix it" but this man on the other hand usually cannot keep his itchy hands from trying to make things run more smoothly. He would be continually suggesting you change your hairstyle, lose weight, use more makeup, buy different clothes, etc if he felt you could use some improvement.
Sex would be very ardent here and things in the bedroom would be good. The two of you would be extremely attentive to each other's romantic and sensual needs. It's just outside of the bedroom that things could get difficult. You may be able to carry on a longstanding sexual relationship, but you will never be comfortable with each other apart from that. Your partner always loves to talk about everything, particularly about what he think needs improvement. So sooner or later his perfectionism would take its toll on you, as you cannot stand being constantly analyzed and corrected. Eventually his checklist of what he would like done for or to him in intimate situations would begin to bother you, as you like to be yourself and to follow your instincts, avoiding fixed routines. Compromise would be difficult to achieve.
The best relationship here is for career where the two of you can accomplish more if you work together than apart. Setting aside your differences in the name of achievement and profit is only possible in a working arrangement.
Because the guy is dithering about whether to see you or not, you may have to press him for a decision or a date. Otherwise he will just put off doing anything until you get so fed up you drop him.
HUH, Very interesting about this guy! Didnt realize what kind of person he is until I read your reading. Yes, I dont like people to tell me what I should do. I like to listen to ppl's genuine advices, but I am the one who makes the decision if I wanna do it or not. Definitely dont like if my partner keeps telling me where I should improve. guess nobody appreciates it.
Since he's dithering around... I wont do anything.. if he is no longer interested in meeting up, I am fine. Hey, Captain, I am just curious - since I wont "chase" him whatsoever, do you feel if we can still meet up sometime soon? Please let me know. Thanks!
OH another question becuz of my curiosity - why is he dithering about whether seeing me or not? I know its part of personality or how he deals with daily life.. but besides that reason, is it because he is losing interest in meeting me?? am I not good enough for him? come on...
He dithers over whether he wants a career or a personal life - thus he is unsure of getting into any relationship.
And I'm not sure why you would still want to meet up with someone who would cause you so much stress?
True. I pretty much lost interest in him... As i said, I asked about those questions becuz of my curiosity. Of course I don't want anybody to think of me as a woman who is not good enough for him! My stupid ego problem. Anyway, thanks for the reading, captain hope ur having a good day today. Hugs.
You're very welcome - and you deserve much better than this guy!