How to heal a Pisces Male...Also could I get a reading?

  • I am a Scorpio woman (11/5/1987) and the man that I love is a Pisces male (3/11/1982). He has had issues for the last 10 years with drugs and I have recently helped him move closer to me so that I can help him get off of them. He has expressed the desire to seek treatment and I have told him I would do anything that I could to help him. He came over the other day and used in front of me, hadn't slept for a few days and I asked him to leave after 24 hours of this. We had started bickering towards the end of this episode, nothing bad or out of control, just my asking him to leave. I could tell he was deeply hurt by this. I was tired and sick of seeing him hurt himself. He told me that I would never see or hear from him again. When he did actually leave I was sleeping on the couch, but heard him say "thank you for all of the help, call me so that you can get your things and so we can talk this through." His cell phone is dead. I have reason to suspect he has gotten a new number as well. What should I do? I have talked with his family members, who are all concerned about him. One of them contacted me last night and said that he was with her, that he was completely out of it but had eaten etc. I asked her to have him call me when he could, if he wanted to. We haven't gone a single day without talking with one another for over a few months. He has expressed suicidal tendencies/thoughts to me and his father passed away suddenly a few months ago(he started using heavily after this). Also on top of it all, he has an ex fiancee who has tortured him for well over a year now. He and I were friends first, so we don't bullshit one another and are very open and honest with each other. I just feel as if I did not express my feelings to him the way I should have out of fear that I would hurt his ego even more. Typical Pisces wanting his girl to be who he envisions her to be. Should I give him time and not contact him? I am very worried about his well being and am thankful that I at least know where he was for the day. I feel guilty for having asked him to leave, but I had to stand my ground. Any suggestions?

  • I'm sorry but at this point your friend loves drugs more than he loves you or anyone else. They are his mistress and there is nothing you can do to compete with the high 'she' gives him. Why would he want to change his ways anyway while you still stick around, so that he has both you and drugs? You have to help him come to his senses by walking away. Everyone is enabling him by propping him up. There is no need for him to try and get better. He and he alone is the only person who can help him kick his habit. Sometimes it is only when a person has no one to carry him that he learns to walk on his own two feet. If he cannot kick this habit, it's neither your fault or your problem. You deserve to be with someone who is in love with you alone.

  • I'm new to this forum thing so please bear with me as I try to sort things out! Thank you for any insight any of you might add.

  • Thank you for the reply Captain. I truly appreciate the insight. The reason that you stated is what I was feeling when I asked him to leave. It absolutely tore me up inside seeing him this way. He was never like this before. I don't want to give him up, at all. It's hard for me to walk away from someone that I love and care for. I tend to stick it out until they push me away. Which is what it seemed like he was doing. I think he is just embarrassed and know that he wants to do better for me, knowing that he can't right now while he is struggling with his habit. Should I say anything to him or just keep the silence and hope that he gets better. What if he does and comes back? Or asks for my help while trying to stay sober? I helped him with nearly two weeks of detox but he relapsed. I am very close to his family and feel a sense of responsibility to him.

  • Is there any sort of compatibility in our charts at all? I'm also new to the whole astrology thing...

  • You will actually be harming him if you keep on 'helping' him. You are making it too easy for him to relapse. Why would he want to get better when he has everyone looking after him now? he has become dependent on being taken care of. He is already depenent on drugs and now those that love him have made him dependent on their help. How will he learn to do for himself with all this enabling from others? He has to want to get better and at the moment it's 'rewarding' for him to stay needy and sick. Unfortunately drug use and other forms of escapism and addiction are fairly common for some Pisces people.

    Astrology predicts this can work for a love affair for a time, but would be unlikely to make it to marriage or any sort of committed love relationship. Your affair is more soulful than romantic. An element of sorrow or pain is common to this combination, for there is a deep awareness of the travails of life here. Happiness between you has a slightly bittersweet quality, being suffused with the belief that, although life is not a bed of roses, things most often turn out for the best. If you did marry, a spirit of sad resignation would likely grip you as you two encountered some pretty rough spots, unfortunately ensuring the relationship's ultimate demise. Your friend's problem is that he is an idealist who longs for a perfect life and cannot deal with the reality of the world. He is not tough enough to handle real life so he escapes into addiction, fantasy, and forgetting. He is still a child at heart and needs to grow up emotionally. He cannot stand any sort of responsibility or for people to try and tie him down, so he runs away from those who love him, yet at the same time yearning for acceptance and recognition. Being on drugs certainly gets him the attention he craves so badly!

  • Well that was spot on. Sadly...I can definitely relate already to the bittersweet quality of our relationship. We have both been able to help one another through some tough times in the past. He has been leaning on me quite a bit lately. He has the want and urge to get better. But also the addiction stands in his way, as they tend to. Guess I have been, like the rest of his family, holding onto the fact of the future guy based off of the one that we see so very often and love so very much. I'm not one to think that rough spots in a relationship should lead to it's demise, however. I think if people are willing to work on things and reach a level of understanding and talk about issues at hand, then all can be fixed or at least understood....made known. I'm wondering what my problem is, then? I keep putting my all into these failed relationships, sacrificing myself time and time again. And for what? It's just damn depressing.

  • SS, you have a marked tendency to chase after fantasy or impossible relationships because you need a respite from the grinding routine of daily life. You want to live your own big dramatic love story. These relationships are exciting and unpredictable, therefore a big rush for you. It's even better if there is something secret, dangerous, or forbidden about them. In your own way, you are as addicted to them as your friend is addicted to drugs. In your fantasy story, you are the beautiful princess who arrives to save the wounded prince from the clutches of whatever danger he is in, earning his undying love and gratitude. This is so much more exciting than real life. Not many people realise but you can be very fragile emotionally and you are often too quick to give yourself away to these fantastic but unrealistic dreams. In an intimate situation, you can be a little too submissive too fast. For you, the ecstacy found in someone else's arms is indescribable. You get very lonely and crave warm, intimate contact to be able to let go of and escape the tensions caused by your responsibilities in the outer world. This escaping the real world is as addictive as any stimulant or substance. No wonder you two 'addicts' are drawn together! A normal stable relationship just wouldn't be as thrilling or challenging for you - but it will lead to less heartbreak and more happiness and peace in the end.

  • Less heartbreak and more happiness and peace in the end? How can that be? Definitely spot on....thank you.

  • As in a normal relationship will lead to less heartbreak and more happiness and more peace in the end...that would make sense. Must have read it wrong.

  • Sad that this is a 'No hope' kind of situation for him & myself. Tears me up, that thought.

  • Because it goes against your fantasy of you riding to the rescue and he being eternally grateful and loving to you...happily ever after. Life is just not like that and the sooner you accept reality, the easier your life and love relationships will become.

  • I have no problem accepting reality as it is. I'm OK with moving on with my life and doing what I need to and letting him sort out what he needs to in order for his life to be successful and fulfilling. I've helped friends out before with no thought of anything in return. Naturally, I would love for him to be able to love me as he has said he does. But that isn't possible right now, given his current situation. I don't want to save him, just be there for him.

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