Confused by my Taurus man - HOW UNUSUAL!!
SparklingEmerald last edited by
So, I hope someone can offer some words of wisdom here. Since my previous posts, things have picked up with my Taurus - he is a lot more responsive to texts, returns calls and we are seeing each other at least 3 times a week again - hurrah!!
When we're together we have a great time. We take turns cooking each other dinner, watch DVDs together (often comedy!!), go out for meals and generally just enjoy each other's company. All good right?
OK, so here's where I am confused. I'm not sure what we are, that is, how does he see me? I don't believe he is dating anyone else due to what I have read about Taureans. Besides which, he doesn't seem the type. Does he consider me his girlfriend? We have big hugs when we see each other, hold hands when we're out but apart from that, nothing else has really happened and it's been 3 months. We have barely been intimate with each other, except to kiss each other on the lips, but we've never shared a passionate kiss as such. We haven't slept together yet, which doesn't bother me, but as far as other stuff is concerned, why hasn't he tried? Usually it's me initiating kisses or hugs, though he has no issue with it. When we're out, he'll take my hand but that's about it.
So, is this just Taurean slowness? Is he still 'assessing' me? Surely he would've wanted to share a little more with me in this time? Is he still not sure? What can I do to help? I just find it odd that a 44 year old man hasn't really made a move on me I guess. I've given him plenty of indication that I am into him and I love being in his company. I'm quite affectionate with him but he seems guarded with me in that capacity. I have met his daughter, which was a big step and he's meeting some of my friends next week so he wants me in his life. I have been brought into his inner circle. What gives?
Any feedback would be awesome!
TheCaptain last edited by
I feel that this guy is very slow to trust due to some bad experiences in his life where he was a bit naive and too gullible or trusting and get very hurt or cheated (both in love and money/possessions/resources matters. He also can be a bit stubborn and inflexible and is rather stuck in his ways. He likes being with you sometimes but then he just wants to be on his own in his own home and letting it all hang out. I don't really feel he wants to change his routines (some might call it a rut) for anyone. But he feels safer when he's alone, safer from being hurt. But he will find he cannot hide at home from life - it will come get him anyway because we always attract what we fear. So he might as well face it with that endurance and strength that Taureans have.
Would you be happy if things stayed the way they are because I don't feel this man moving to another level of the relationship anytime soon?
snowball543 last edited by
“OK, so here's where I am confused. I'm not sure what we are, that is, how does he see me?” I think he sees you as someone he is enjoying getting to know. It does not sound as if he sees you as his girlfriend just yet, however, its only been 3 months and earth signs in general tend to be sloooow in this area (I usually take 3 months to decide to continue or break it off and between 5-6 months I’ll make the decision to commit or not).
“nothing else has really happened and it's been 3 months.” Is he the traditional type with old school values? If so then this may be because you are not committed and he wishes to wait and I really respect that. HOWEVER, if not then this is definitely an indicator that something is off somewhere somehow. Not the lack of sex per se, but the lack of effort on his part to pursue physically indicates something (lack of chemistry, physical reasons, low sex drive, emotional issues, ect, ect.). I can say personally that, every maleTaurus I have dealt with, while slow in matters of the heart were VERY sexual and physical very early on, but I guess Taurus males could weigh in better in this area.
Is he still not sure? I doubt he is sure at this stage
What can I do to help? Nothing really
I have to agree with Captain, I’m getting the feeling that this is sort of how he is and you shouldn’t expect much to change in terms of his behavioral traits.
SparklingEmerald last edited by
Thank you for your feedback. I kind of suspected as such.
I guess the question is, should I approach it with him and if so how?
WiseSagittarius last edited by
Taurus’s are simply very slow to move in any direction. They can get confused easily by change too. They are terrified of change and a new romance is a major change to a Taurus that they must tread carefully through.
You must lead the Taurus in relationships. You must wear the pants and be willing to take blame for your mistakes in judgment. Taurus are followers and will follow a dominant lover they can trust and who leads them to fun. You will need to be more aggressive and decisive but be free and fun with it. Don't be mean with it or he will criticize you.
Taurus also have a high sex drive. Taurus are very into beauty. The more physically beautiful you are the more a Taurus will trust you, follow you, bond with you, and lift you up on a pedestal. So the Taurus loves hot sex. If he is taking too long to have sex with you, then he probably isn’t attracted to you.
The Taurus also goes into very long bouts of depression because something is wrong in their life and they are too afraid to change it. Some Taurus are so depressed that it's not healthy to date them. As they will make you depressed and will always have a sob story. They stay in really horrible situations because of their fear of change.
TheCaptain last edited by
No, you cannot move a Taurean if they are not prepared to go forwards. You simply have to give him time to trust you by being patient and not pushing for more at the moment. This guy always feels like people want to take from him. You may have to be prepared to give for a good while longer. If you cannot wait for what may be a very long time, then you need to find someone else. In the end, there is no guarantee that this guy will change, or that he even wants to change his ways.