Taurus woman currently cursing out fate and/or karma because of a Cancer man

  • I'm quite at my wits end about how I've ended up in the situation I am now so have decided to put it up here with hopes of getting some advice on how to deal with everything:

    I met this cancer guy through work nine months or so back. We were both legal interns working for the same court.

    I'm generally a reserved person in the sense that I'm friendly with people but keep everything on a superficial level. Well this cancer guy started to draw me out, started asking me questions about my interests, life, where I grew up etc and we ended up becoming friends. I felt as if I could tell him pretty much everything and did so and we'd joke about everything. I felt as if he had potential to become my best friend. I wasn't interested in anything more than that since I knew he has a girlfriend and for me that meant he was a total no go. Besides I'm closed off emotionally anyway, I've never been involved in an emotional relationship because I'm terrified of strong emotion (baggage from my childhood. I prefer my feelings on a balanced level)

    Anyways, early December I was over at his place for a party and we ended up talking to each other the whole night. I even asked him why he even started hanging out with me and he said, it was because he felt as if I was safe. I laughed and said I feel the same way too. At about 3 a.m. I wanted to take the bus home and he said forget it, you can sleep over in my bed. When I said "yeah right", he told me, "Hey you know me, you're safe with me and I promise nothing will happen". I believed him and so I borrowed a pair of pajamas and decided to sleep in his bed (the sofa was taken by another friend) sure that nothing will happen.

    Well then he started kissing me on the head, calling me little one, asking me if I was okay etc. I was all "Whoa!!!". I was shocked because I actually liked it. However since he has a grilfriend I said something like "hey that tickles and you know I've neever done this before, so we shouldnt". He stopped and I couldn't sleep for the next 3 hours or so. I was in shock, first that he had even tried and second that I liked it.

    In the morning he tried again and this time I only stopped him after he kissed me. However I did stop him and then he said "you're right it was a mistake". I was still in shock and went on my autopilot and said "yeah you're right". I asked him if we were still okay and friends, he said "yeah, but that was a mistake, will never happen again". I said "yeah, I agree" and then left. We didn't talk for weeks after that.

    2 weeks later he went overseas to meet his girlfriend. In January he started chatting to me and said his girlfriend was coming to visit him. This was the time that I finally admitted to myself that maybe I had feelings for my friend, because that info hurt. Before this I was trying to repress and deny anything had ever happened.

    Towards the end of January we were hanging out drinking coffee he made a move on me again while we were talking about clothes about all things. I stopped him in his tracks saying I couldn't because he has a gf and because of morals, ethics etc. He said: "You're right, your'e right" and then when I asked him why he even tried anything he said that he didn't know why, but that he had thought we could be together until his girl friend visited him or some crap like that.

    This really pissed me off but I went on auto pilot again and made some jokes and left. But I was so hurt I was crying all the way home. Then a few days later I decided that I wasn't going to let him treat me that way and laid it all out to him in a message that said I was confused by him and that he had hurt m like treating me like a toy and he shouldn't and he should be more consderate about his gf. He wrote back apologising and saying that he had no idea why he did what he did, he likes hanging out with me but that he really loves his gf, sees a future with her and was even going to marry her and that he was probably nervous about it or something. I didn't write back.

    Now the thing is ever since then I keep running into him. Once I went out to eat lunch with a friend and the waiter seated me at the same table where my ex-friend was sitting. I live in a big city, not a tiny town. This shouldn't happen. When I saw him again I was so shocked that I felt queasy the whole time. But I couldn't act as if he were a stranger so I smiled, said hello, didn't talk to him during eating and then just said goodbye. Then two days later I run into him at a bar.

    However the absolute worse coincidence is that last Friday I found out that I'll be working with him again in 6 weeks. I went to the interview, got the confirmation of the job. Then my future boss wanted to show me my new office, he said "I think you know your future office companion", I think "huh" take a look and went "OH CRAP". My ex-friend is my new office partner...

    I'm now thoroughly cursing out my fate/karma and wondering what to do. I can't turn down the job, I need it to qualify as a lawyer. Do I keep going on acting as if nothing is wrong? Because the funny thing is, I can't be mad at him or anything like that. We can still chatter away like long lost best friends. Still I just don't know how to do or feel, except of course be convinced that murphy's law is out in full force with me.

  • Maybe there is a past life connection, a situation repeating itself, or unfinished business? I would hesitate to feel anything more than a friend with him because of his flirty ways. Would you like him to treat another woman the way he treated you if you were romanitcally involved? There may be the law of attraction here, a chance for you to open up, letting your guard down with him is teaching you that you can reach out and be a little vulnerable, but watch out for the sharks, they smell innocence or fear, and like the challenge. I wish you well and have fun, but don't share any more private feelings with him, it is safer to maybe take your power back, let the relationship settle into a more respectful way, that way you won't end up sabotoging your career and reputation. Find another buddy, you are charming smart. Too many women, especially ones who have been deeply hurt in childhood, mistake the gestures of men to beof friendship when meanwhile they can have alterior motives, like keeping you on the side. This may sound harsh, but why take the chance? Don't explain yourself to him anymore, this only gives him satisfaction that he has some hold on you,. If you do an about face, see how his reaction is, You may be surprised at how cunning he may become or worse, even malicious. Just be careful, people can be fickle. You are gold and know it! Be happy, but balanced.

  • Oh WOW! I feel for you. Maybe you should just talk to him about the way both of you are being pulled together.......it seams that there could be a strong reason as to why this keeps happening.

  • Other than rotten bad luck? I called 21 law firms and there was only one with an internship open on short notice. This law firm is spread over three stories and I end up in the same office (office for 2 people) as him? With bad luck like this, who needs enemies =(

  • Stay reserved and keep it friendship only. Perhaps theres issues for both of you to resolve to move on. Not sure whether to resolve together or yourselves. Maybe bring it up and see how it goes and then resolve anything that comes up then you both can move on.

  • Galathea83, I see that I may have come across negatively, sorry about that. I say these things about this man because he sounds a little manipulative, the fact that he is getting married and kissing you, the other hint is that working in the area of law wields a lot of power and maybe even games that people play to win. Feelings at this stage of the game with him is senseless, unless you plan on haveing a clandestine relationship with him, but work and play don't mix. Maybe you should heed the advice of others and talk to him about these synchronicities. Also talk to the boss and see why you were chosen to work in that office and if someone referred you, or see if he set you up with this job. Why did someone say that you two know eachother when you were shown to the office? There may be several layers of hidden agendas going on here. Is he able to find personal info about you like where you are going and when? Have you logged out of facebook when and if talking to someone. If not the world can check you out. I know we all need friends, but be careful please and cover your butt, always. Sorry for sounding so nosey and forthright, but I have the experience in this area with men.

  • I would to say he is somehow feeling lonely at times. Worst part is ,he is seeking validation from females so beside you and behind his fiance, probably he is always been endless of seeking to reassure his attractiveness. Well i would like to say just leave him alone or simply get down into business and nothing but only discussion about works. Eventually he will find another target for short fling.

  • Dear Galathea83

    How about a past life reading, this may help. Let me know if you would like one. I will be available to do one in a few days.

  • luv2laf: I'd love one if it isn't too much trouble for you. What information would you need?

    Thank you to everyone else ho has replied. I do intend to keep everything at a business level and be friendly but cool. It's difficult being cool though. Whenever I'm around him I feel as if I have my favourite teddy bear around and that I can tell him anything. I can deal with the feelings and am a champion at acting blind and oblivious, but I wish I didn't have to. Darn feelings =/

  • Ya, totally!

  • Find another job so not have to work with the dude

  • Hi Galathea83, this reading may bring him up, if you know his sign, or if you know the cards pick a court card for him. As well, your sign, and I am so releaved that you did not take me the wrong way, this is all good. I will read for you soon, by the weekend or sooner, but send this info asap so that I can prepare, thanks.

  • I just wanted to add that there is an awful lot of positive energy around here for Taurus women and Cancer Men relationships working out very well.

    All of them seem to have their snags and hiccups.......but....working out in the end.....

    Instead of cursing this fate...have you thought about embracing it? If you would want to know more about what I mean just let me know!

  • So agree with T-7, somethings are just to good to be true......

  • luv2laf: Which reading do you mean? I'm afraid I don't see any links in your post. As for my details, I was born on the 21st of April 1983, around 2 o'clock in the morning, GMT + 5.30. He was born on the 25th of June 1986. Don't have a birth time for him. Hope this info helps.

    Taurus7: Should I really embrace it? As long as he's in a relationship I really don't want to have to do anything with him. I don't feel as if it'd be right to come between him and his GF.

  • Darlin..yes you should embrace it, not for him, but only for yourself! What transpires between you and him, will transpire, but for your own personal journey, I think it is a must that you embrace your fate........I am almost 44...listen to your elders baby bull...:D

  • T8 - I ADORE you!!!

  • If you follow this advice of being with this man, then how will you feel if he does the same thing to you? Look at his character, and this has probably happened before with other women, this may be a pattern with him, do you want to always wonder if he is loyal and honest to you? I think that I had bettter leave this one alone, the reading. I wish you all the best, but be warned that you may be hurt. Take care and remember that what ever choice you make, you will have to be responsible for the consequences.I will not be on this topic again. It's just commen sense in my opinion, not a spiritual connection that needs to be studied. Tit for tat in the past, now is what is happening, see the truth as you know it, that is what will protect you in the future.

  • Oh hell no!! This is way bigger than the what if he does this to you mumbo jumbo......it really is!! This is solely for her...to learn how to empower herself..how to find true joy!!


  • I can guarantee you one thing..this has NEVER happened to him before......maybe your heart will get broken..but at least you will learn baby girl how to dare, take a chance, cast your fate to the winds.....which is so freeing.......as an older bull...you just have to trust me...

    Heart break is not the end of the world..but failure to get in the game is.....chrage it baby girl!! Full steam dead ahead!!

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