Broken hearted and seeking insight/advice
My relationship of two years has ended recently. I love this man with all my heart but so many outside forces have led to the demise of our relationship.
A few months ago I ended our relationship because of his family. They are in my opinion very controlling and they also have very strong reliious beliefs that they try to impose on me. This would normally be something I could work through but his family lives in the same small town where he lives and works. I would have married him in a heart beat if we did not have to live in such a small isolated town surrounded by his family.
I miss him so much though and feel as though i will never love anyone as much as I love him. I don't even know if he would take me back though since many hurtful things were said but I am considering going back and trying to work things out...even though i find his living situation to be incrediby difficult. He is unable to move for at least 10 years because of his work but i am used to life in big cities, open minded/diverse people and I value my privacy. Too much scrutiny and small town gossip makes me anxious.
Anyone have any wise words of advice? Can true love conquer all. Can this relationship or marriage work despite the shortcomings? I've even tried to do readings for this situation but am worried that I am too emotionally upset to rea anything clearly. Any advice would be appreciated.
Dear Stonyeye. Wouldn't t be a good idea to move away? What about your star sign? What sort of battering ae the plaets giving you.? You have my sympathy...a loss like this is like a spiritual death... it's waiting to be reborn that is so painful!
Thank you so much for your response. You are right, it is like a spiritual death. I have moved away and been away for several months but I miss him so much! I keep second guessing my decision and wondering if maybe I should have tried harder to adjust to his family and small town life. I'm a libra and he is a leo but he seems more like a cancer or maybe even capricorn to me. Anyway, your comment about waiting to be reborn has stuck with me and I will have to remember that. We all do move on eventually but it can be so hard when you still love the other person so much! Thanks again for your kind words.
Dear Stoneyeye. I think you will have done all the 'bending over backwards', rather than your Leo. My family is full of Leos - lovely people, but they have to have their own way , or throw tantrums (subtle and not so subtle) I am not sre that the aggro is good for your soul!
. You have Saturn coming up on your Sun in the Autumn/Fall,, which will stay for two years. Time to learn - 'seed' time in fact. The most productive thing to do is embark on a course of education to fill up the void. You will emerge out of this seed time like a butterfly from a chrysalis. Is this a possibility? Bless.
In your gut you know this man is NOT who you are suppose to be with. Always listen with your gut not your heart which is telling you, give it one more try. Bid this disaster a fine farewell and move on. You can only accept something new into your life when you have finally released your heart from the torment of this man. The more time you sit questioning yourself and brooding, the longer it is going to take to allow someone worthy of you into your life.
This man was not a lifer, he was a stepping stone, an experience you needed before Mr. Right could really come along.
Now cheer up, nothing but blue sky's are ahead!!!
Thank you both so much..It's very easy to over think relationships isn't it! I have been feeling that I will never love another man as much as I loved this one and after being with him for a few years, ending the relationship almost feels as though I have lost a part of myself. I suppose that if I really pay attention, my gut feeling does tell me to move on though even though it's painful and scary! Thank you very much for taking the time to respond and also for the words of encouragement about moving on. It's wonderful to have an outside perspective. All the best to you both.
My vote is move forward, or move on. I like the idea of Higher Education. Higher Education is becoming more valuable and education pays off!
What do you want more than anything else?
How are you doing at loving yourself and being your own best friend?
Stonyeye- i can understand exactly how you are feeling. Come take a look at my blog and you will find likeminded people.
My best to you.
Wow! It's so interesting to me that both "highpriestess" and "Desire4895" suggested higher education. I am actually set to pursue a masters starting in September!
Also, Desire, you asked some very good questions for me to consider.
Thank you again for taking the time to answer my post. Very helpful suggestions and comments from everyone.
God I get so much comfort from reading on here. I'm telling you to go with your gut too sweety. The heart can hold so many memories that seem bitter sweet when you compare them to what your instincts tell you. I've been put in pretty much the same predicament due to outside influences working against me. My thinking has been clouded due to my hearts desire, but hearts go on in different directions, and one day, soon I hope, mine will too. Give yourself the time and the courage to overcome the pain from what really hurts you, be strong, love the person that you were meant to be It does help to get others insights on pain and getting over it. Someone already has left me with a thought on here; You need to go through the pain, not as a shortcut, but the whole experience, to come out of it a better, wiser person. Another thing that I believe in. Things in life, happen for a 'reason'. Trust in who you are, take the bad experiences, and learn from them, and you'll never go wrong. Be you're own council. Take no pity. Love yourself, and live your life. Be good to you, and those that aren't simply aren't worth it. I rest my case Take care love xxxx
Hi "Missy" -
Your comment "The heart can hold so many memories that seem bitter sweet when you compare them to what your instincts tell you" has really stuck with me. I need to write that down and look it at when I get sad. Thanks for your sweet response. I'm sorry you've been in the same position as I described. Feels pretty icky doesn't it? It's difficult to remember that time heals everything and this feeling won't stay forever but it's not the nicest process to go through. Thanks again. I really appreciate your comments.