Taurus woman seeking to understand cancer women
Hello! I am a Taurus and hoping to understand my cancer lady friend. I am interested in pushing our relationship past friendship, but I think it's going to take some time, nurturing, patience, and advice from people who understand cancer women more than my bewildered self right now!
I am growing closer with her. We have great energy together, it does seem that I am a steadying and calming force. We share several of the same interests and have deep conversations about life and values. What's more, I am very adept at making her laugh.
I am not so talented about getting her to open up. It seems as if she shares a deeper part of herself with me more than with other people, so I know there's an element of trust. I can't yet get her to open up about or discuss past loves or relationships.
She's got several of those. I've read widely that cancer looks for love and intimate relationships, but this girl couldn't be farther off. She has had lots of casual sex in the past. My guess would be she just keeps lots of bed buddies, void of any intimacy, because she's scared of letting people get close. Recently the last few times we went out she has asked me to stop her from going home with random people, as if she wants to change her casual sex streak. She has it on her facebook wall that she's interested in women, but her actions couldn't seem more opposite.
Then she told me yesterday that she was probably going to have some casual sex this weekend. This came after she apologized (unnecessarily) for reams of dudes hitting on her at a bar and her hanging by an ex(?) bed buddy at the bar. I tried my best to give a level-headed response. Was this meant as a test? Was she trying to elicit some response from me?
How do I get her to open up to me and talk about past relationships? Is she sending me mixed signals or am I just not doing or seeing something correctly? It's becoming apparent that she wants to share some things with me, just can't quite continue. Should I take the first step by sharing some personal things about my past and making myself look vulnerable and confiding trust? I have been very patient, not prodding by any means for information. She's a very complex, interesting soul and I just want to understand her. Annnnd make her fall in love with me.
Any advice will be MUCH appreciated! Help me quell this headache!
Seems to me like she has plenty of lovers but what she needs most right now is a good friend, someone she can trust and who doesn't put any heavy demands on her. She has made it clear that with romantic relationships she doesn't want to be monogamous. I think if you break her trust as a friend, she will come to view you very differently - and with less trust.