Blmoon, can you give me some advice...



  • I'm laughing!!! Yes those scorpios!! Nothing wrong with you. Scorpios are magnetic and hard to resist. The less evolved ones are shameless. Lucky you and sad for your poor girlfriend. Be grateful you dodged a bullit and if a man is too good to be true too fast be more cautiouse as it could mean yes he's really head over heals OR hes just a player. Cut yourself slack and next time be extra cautiouse with a scorpio--specially if hes extra eager as most scorpios if smitten go slow at first as being captured scares them yet they are led by their passions. BLESSINGS!



  • Unfortunately I didn't know he was a scorpio, just found out yesterday by accident. I'm usually a quite reasonable and calm person, but if someone crosses the line and goes against my values, then there are no second chances. And I don't tolerate people who have no sense of what is acceptable and what is not. So the girlfriend and the scorpio have both earned a place on my black list. The only bad thing is that it will be hard to avoid the scoripo and I suspect the next time I see him I will not be able to resist telling him what a coplete moron he is...



  • Best way to deal with the Scorpio is cool propriaty. As if you have no emotion for him at all. He enjoys the rise he gets out of the ladies good and bad but to be ignored or dismissed as NOT so magnetic or charming is an insult he hates. A player is used to ticked off ladies and has a whole defense planned and if he can seduce her out of anger he so enjoys that like a sport so change the game and smile a lot but act like it never happened. If he presses you for a meet up smile and say something like sorry I'm washing my hair tonight or I'm going to church. If he laughs give him a dead seriouse look--like what's so funny? Entertain yourself but do not give away your emotions--trust me, telling him off is a treat for him. BLESSINGS!

    PS--at least life showed you the truth about your friend!



  • Blmoon,

    I've been thinking, now that I have calmed down a bit, if I'm being too harsh on the friend. I haven't wanted to talk to her yet, because I don't know what to say, I don't want to have some very emotional conversation so I prefer to postpone that as long as possible. She did send me a letter though, saying that he just went to his place to talk, that she liked him and didn't know it would bother me, etc. So maybe she really didn't get it that she was stepping on my toes, but that would mean she is either too dumb to understand what is going on around her or she just doesn't care, neither option seems very promising.. .We have never had any problems so far, I've known her since april.

    I do like her, but a while back I did get an impression that maybe she isn't playing fair. We had one common british friend and when she started to date one guy, it turned out that the other friend was also occasionally going out with him, because they just get along well and are friends and although she kept saying that she is not attracted to him, it just didn't seem to add up. At the time I wondered would the british woman really be okay with that that her girlfriend is also hanging out with her new boyfriend but I didn't have a chance to ask and thought I'd better stay out of that anyway.

    This very international group of friends is fun and interesting, but at the same time , sometimes I really feel that I just don't understand where people are coming from, we just all have very different world views and backgrounds I think.

    Thank you!

    Regards,

    K.

    PS You are right about the scorpio, no use of being angry with him. In fact I remember he and my friends (guys) were joking on Sunday about how many women are really pissed-off with them at the moment...



  • Your friend is easily seduced and if you choose to let her be herself just never forget who she realy is as when someone shows you who they are believe them. There are friends and there are not so close friends who all have their issues and everyone decides what they can live with. She obviousely seeks aproval and hates rejection and gets a momentary fix of feeling good when she "wins". But really it spirils down when she realises it was nothing and not only does she give herself away too eagerly but she betrays those who are true to her. She is needy for love. You can see from a distance how that can lead a girl into seeing and hearing what she craves and misses the truth. As for feeling attracted to the player--it's what he does well and that's why a woman needs to go slow before jumping in because had you watched this guy for awhile in several social settings you would of figured him out. Your lonely right now and like being on a diet--it is hard to walk past the bakery! You can be introverted and often the guys who are not pull you in as it is easy for you but extroverts can be either very social outgoing positive people OR they can be players--smooth talkers--cons. Since you tend to like a man with confidence and one who leads you should spend some thought on telling the difference between the givers and the users. What are the signs?



  • Hi Blmoon,

    I like the bakery comparison, very true:)

    I talked with my friend yesterday, told her why I was upset and what are the things I don't like etc. I think she understood that. It was partly my fault too, because she really didn't know I liked him.

    Anyway, for the first time she told me about her family, she has 8 brothers and sisters and they grew up in a small village in Mexico, her parents did not have too much time to be very affectionate with all the children, and they were fighting a lot. She told me her father was very distant, never told her he loves her or even gave her a gift for her birthday etc. So she has been on her own pretty much since she was 16. I feel bad for her, I didn't know. It must have been hard, especially here in mex where families are usually very-very close and important.

    And you were right about her seeking approval, especially form men, she told me that she needs that a lot to feel good, in her words, it makes her light up to feel adored by a guy. I guess I can understand where that comes form, but she obviously has issues to deal with. The guys she is dating are unfortunately mostly players, very handsome guys, models and actors, but who are not looking for anything serious. One of our friends, a guy who is also very much a player himself, told her yesterday that she is delusional thinking that the guys she goes out with consider her a girlfriend because she is selling herself short and they are just using her. That must have been though to hear. Now I just feel bad for her and I wish I could help. I think she is kind of lost, like me...

    Hope you are having a nice weekend!

    Regards,

    K.



  • Hi Blmoon,

    Hope October is treating you well:)

    I have been completely exhausted, too much socializing at work and outside, so I just need some alone time. Even sleeping feel like work as I keep having a lot of dreams that are disturbing and annoying, so I don't know if I should do something with all the things that come up or just let it be.

    Well anyway, I was checking out if the company I applied to reently has any other openings where I could apply and I found one in Spain that seems very interesting and could fit with my profile. By the description it seems a nice compromise between office work and working in the field as it would be based in Spain but would involve a lot of traveling to all these places where they work. So I will apply for that. But I was thinking should I contact the Spanish guy with whom I had the interview? It might give me and advantage if he could recommend me, besides he has worked in the Spanish office before, so surely he knows all the people there. What do you think? Would he help me with that?

    Thank you!

    Regards,

    K.



  • I think since he has already contacted you before you wouldn't be out of line. What was your gut feeling? Follow that. I do not get any negative vibes. As for restless dreams and tiredness--it is universal! I had the same thing! BLESSINGS!



  • Hi Blmoon,

    I did write him a letter, but he hasn't answered yet, I'm sure he is busy. I didn't ask him directly to recommend me, I just asked if it would be okay with him if I mention that I had an interview with him and did a test etc, and if they may contact him. Anyway, if he doesn't answer next week, I won't mention anything in my application. Do you see anything about that job? Do I have a chance?

    I did kind of get another offer this week, but I don't think its something that I'm looking for. One woman from our company's San Francisco office was here and I helped her with some translation things, when she left she said that they are looking for people with my profile and if I'm interested I should let her know. But that just seems more or less the same job, only in US, so I'm not too excited about that.

    Wish you a nice weekend!

    Regards,

    K.



  • Tomorrow is the new moon a good day to make an effort. The united states thing feels positive. I feel its meant to be a choice and not a right or wrong thing. I feel there is a positive relationship on that end. Because of the great migration of spanish in the states there is a very high demand for bilingual. In fact it has changed the job market very much in that a lot of companys consider bilingual the advantage. I think you would have many opportunities in the states not just that position--if you really were not happy there you would have other opportunities. The other job--If your contact from before does not answer--do not include that info about already aplying to their company. Although they often include that question in the aplication. If you mentioned straight off about the test etc the person looking over the aplication may consider you a reject so let your qualifications stand alone and then if you get the call for an interviw you can mention it. Also, I keep getting a New York image--do you have a connection to that? Not sure what that is about. I'm off to work. BLESSINGS!



  • Hi Blmoon,

    Thank you for your answer. I can see that there would be good opportunities in US and San Francisco would be a nice place to live, I imagine, never been on the west coast, though. But I'm not sure this would be the change I'm looking for, because the job would still be more or less the same, in the same company etc and I have tried that, changing locations but doing the same job and I feel its not enough. I want to find a job I'm excited about. But I have time to think about it, she said if I decide I want to go there, I should let her no, no deadline.

    I think you are right, maybe I won't mention the other interview, unless the Spanish guy says that he would recommend me for the position.

    New York...I don't know. I'm in contact with our NY office also quite a lot as we consult them about some things, but I don't think they would offer me anything there, I would need to get another promotion before.

    The only other NY connections is that my cousin will got to NY and Miami for vacations in november and I asked him to come and visit me too, so I'm looking tickets for him:))

    I know that logically thinking Spain doesn't make much sense as they are in the middle of economic crisis, but I really want to move somewhere where I feel I can live for quite some time and I think that place can be somewhere in southern Europe.

    I hope the new moon brings some new ideas.

    Wish you a great day!

    Regards,

    K.



  • I forgot to mention that I saw the scorpio today for the first time after the barbecue. I was reading a book by the pool, he came and sat next to me. We chatted a bit, all very friendly, he asked me if I had had lunch already, I said not yet and continued to read. Then he started talking with his parents on skype, I didn't understand anything because he was talking in Catalan, so suddenly he turns the camera to me and says hey look these are my parents, I mumbled hello or something like that. He kept talking for a while more, it was late so I started packing my things, then he ends the call and asks if I'm going to have lunch, I said yes and that I have other things to do as well. So I left. He confuses me. He can be so terribly charming and I find him very interesting, but at the same time I feel I'd better stay away from him. As for the friend incident, she said nothing happened with the scorpio and they haven't been in contact.

    To make things a bit more complicated, there is another Spanish neighbor, he is friends with the scorpio and I think he likes me. He is very different form the scorpio, super friendly and sociable and knows almost everyone in the building. He has been inviting me out a few times, once even to go out of the city for the weekend, but I haven't been out with him. Not my type I think, and he is 9 years older than me.

    Some days my head gets spinning trying to decide what to do, all the thoughts about moving and changing jobs and still thinking it would be nice to meet someone etc.

    Regards,

    K.



  • NEW MOON!

    Sounds like you are being you--hating the patience part. Not knowing what is next. I believe my New York radar was about your cousin and something to look forward to. You did good with the scorpio although be aware that getting dissed may make him more determined into the chase. He is so busy chasing he tends to not take time to really get to know someone--as you already sense he's self centered and like a child "look at me look at me". He is imature. There is a reality to magnatism in scorpios and in some men of any sign and you are learning. It is hard not to be cynical or closed off and be hundred percent safe from players but there is a happy middle ground. Since you are attracted to selconfident ectroverts it is important you get to know the ones who are truely selfconfident and big hearted and those who mask insecurity with a script of false bravado. Usually you must see them from a distance out of range of their spell and see their lives--the reality of it. I bet the player has a lot of broken hearts left behind and tends to have a lot of anger following him. Since he is a scorpio he can respect honesty. He will eventually ask you or say directly 'you don't like me do you?". You can say--I do not even know you but my player radar goes off every time you smile and a smart girl can't be too carefull. Sometimes an imature scorpio will hit on girls looking for the ONE who doesn't melt so quik. He would repeat a past pattern with you---a man pulling you out of your shell only to run once he's got you. The older man is a good time but also not commitment material----he is past the chasing days and knows he doesn't need to prove anything. He would be a good time but is a loner. He is very happy being single. He is more respectful than the scorpio. He does get lonely at times but understands it always passes and woman come and go. He doesn't force things. Of course, it would be a no to ever go away with a man you did not know well. As for the job---keep in mind your true nature and change---you both need it yet hate it. You tend to overthink it to death. When really, an invitation to go a certein direction is just the first step---and THAT can take you places you can't always logicaly predict so learn to chill more and follow your first true gut reaction. BLESSINGS!



  • Hi Blmoon,

    Thank you for your answer! I think you are right about both Spanish guys. The scorpio... I agree that he seems kind of immature, considering that he is 35, he must be working really hard to keep from growing up:) He has said things jokingly that are hard to ignore, like for example he said that he doesn't want to give out his number very freely as he is really annoyed when women he has just met call him too often, so he usually says that he has no battery and he doesn't remember his number... He seems to think that this is amusing, apparently he gave one women the same excuse twice already. Confident definately, but I would say that he doesn't seem very obviously extroverted, in fact he said that although he has been here about 1 year, he doesn't know too many people and he doesn't go out that much. He says he enjoys being alone and reading books and I know he speaks with only a few people in our building. I guess what I'm dissapointed about is that I still attract and am attracted to same kind of guys. You once said that if I will be more aware of my self and my patterns then I can change my energy and the pattern would also change, but it seems that the same issues are still coming up.

    You are right about the older guy too, he does seem happy being single. From what I know he has never been married and doesn't have children. He is quite handsome and successful so I imagine it has been a choice to stay uncommited, not a because of lack of opportunities. He could be a friend perhaps, he has lived here for 7 years so he has a different perspective about the life here.

    I sent the application to Spain today, didn't want to wait until the last minute and maybe the new moon will be a good sign... I do have a feeling that I would like that job a lot.

    So happy New Moon!!!

    Regards,

    K.



  • It is near impossable to change what sparks us BUT we can be aware in a way that allows the brain to engage. Too many woman go around considering a powerfull attraction to mean its for real and meant to be. The soul mate idea. The idea that passion and big sparks mean positive love. I have been married more than forty years to the wildest ride in the park. My father was the first wild scary dominating man to shape me. AND I by nature born like them bigger than life and a tad crazy. BUT I know THAT and I see through these men. The spark leaps for a secound--maybe I enjoy the yummy feelings FROM A DISTANCE but I'm immune. The truth sets you free and you are young and just now getting the new HABIT. Never let a man get your brain tied up in figuring them out--by what they say. They contradict. Just like that players cell phone story or the lonely friendless act. That boy man is whatever he feels the lady of the moment wants. He trys to figure her need. Anyway---once you give yourself enough distance to use your brain--and you ARE very smart you will know all these men who spark you by surprise or clutter your path. You will see through them and you may even enjoy the better ones as friends but they will eventually lose power over you. Awareness is freedom. Each awaerness about our darker side once into the light--given a name---we leap up a notch after that. We still stumble now and then but the difference is we see it right away and get back on path. Consider these men passing through your life--education! Learn to go beyound what they say. Look at their lives --what does that say? Happy new moon--good choice for the job aplication!



  • Hi Blmoon,

    Thank you for the answer, I guess I can only hope that next time I will make smarter choices. I really don't want to become very cynical but the kind of people I know here have made me wonder if there are any genuinely great single guys left. Or maybe I just need to reconsider with what kind of people I want to surround myself with.

    I don't know when or if I will hear back from the place I sent the application, can be a few more weeks I think, the application deadline is this Friday. The Spanish guy hasn't answered either, which is a bit strange, because before he always answered the next day. So I don't know what to think about that.

    However, I got another unexpected job offer. My ex boss from Chile is here on business and he asked me to go for a coffee with him. So we went and at first he was just joking about when I will go back to Chile etc, but then he said that he would really like me to come back there, that I would have a lot of interesting opportunities and that he would like me to lead a new business line that they want to develop there etc. I mean it would definately be a big step upwards in my career and financially it would help me a lot, but going back there was never in my plans.

    Why am I getting these offers that would keep me in the same company but not the ones that would help me make the change I think I really need?

    Wish you a nice week!

    K.



  • The same company does not mean the same expierience or job. I have been with the same school for twelve years yet every year is different and I have seen people come and go and I have changed positions several times so it is possable to be moving forward to something new. Mostly, it works if you are able to see exactly what you hated or don't want again and either express that to a trusted superiour or just draw the line yourself---if they offer you something but you know its not going to keep you happy you say no but keep an pen mind as you can have a new expierience in the same company but you have to have learned something from the past so it doesn't repeat. I had a strong feeling that friendly guy who liked you would not answer. A lot of people hate recomendations--they get paranoid. He doesn't know you personaly just liked your vibe and your qualifications. He may as well been afraid to help you then have you disapointed again. Really my impression was to apply fresh. And you did so your intuitions are good. I think November will be the deciding month that will move you into a new job. I also see a new man interest as well coming soon and this one will be very different than your usual attractions. It will be a slow attraction and a healthy friendship. BLESSINGS! PS--also you will be getting family news --I see the number 6--so not sure if its days weeks or other but 6 is family important and it will be a drama that will be ok.



  • PSPS--I see news of a birth within your close circle.



  • Hi Blmoon,

    I'm so glad you answered me today. I was just wallowing in self-pity thinking about my ex and how he has moved on with another woman and the job thing etc. So thank you for the encouraging words.

    About the Spanish guy, I mean its fine if he doesn't want to recommend me but it would have been nice to hear from him. But I guess he has his reasons for not answering.

    I do hope the job thing gets resolved soon. I haven´t closed any doors in my own company yet, I told the ex boss I will think about it and I guess if he is serious about it he will make me an offer. Although I feel that going back there would not be an ideal solution.

    The new man interest sounds exciting, I think I'm ready to meet someone new and hopefully have learned not to make the same mistakes again.

    The family news is related to the birth? I know that my sisters ex boyfriend is about to become a father very-very soon. He is kind of family to me, he lived with my family for 10 years, after that broke up with my sister started travling around the world and had a lot of affairs. That baby is the result of one of his flings. I haven't talked with him for a while, but from what I have heard, he is not too happy with this situation but I'm sure he will do the right thing and be a responsible father. His mother died when he was young and he didn't get along with his father or step-mother, so I'm sure he doesn't want his child to go through the same things.

    November will be quite busy, but in a good way I hope. My cousin and his friend will come to vist me and stay for a week, that will be fun. And I will go to a one-week training with my colleagues to Acapulco. I have mixed feelings about that, could be fun but I also don't like events where I'm forced to be with a lot of people the whole day and even have to share a room with someone. It's usually very exhausting for me and I just want to escape at some point to have some alone time. So I'm a bit stressed out about that but I guess I will need to make an effort.

    I decided that I need to go home for Christmas, although it will cost me a small fortune and I don't really have too much money. But I haven't been with my family for the last 3 years during Christmas and I really feel I need that, to just take a break and remind myself why I am here and not there and if I would be ready to move back there or not.

    Thank you again!

    Love,

    K.



  • If you get news soon about the sister's ex's child being born than that's it. You'll know. I got a positive on the family visit and that you have been getting spirit whispers on that so trust your gut. I get that someone in the family will be facing a health crisis and you will be glad you went. Do not worry about it though although you may have had "feelings" about this. We are a lot alike about trips with people and staying with others. I feel trapped. Usually the dread is worse then the event! I love folks but also they wear me out with their vibes and energy--I am very sensitive and like my own space and if I feel I'm going into a situation where I have no options I almost miss otherwise goodtimes. There are only a few friends I would share a room with and love it. I don't even like riding in a car with others. I prefer driving alone if only to feel in control of when I choose to leave. I believe I already picked up that visit from your cousin would be important and told you that already.. Also, about the job contact that didn't reply--it may be for a reason you do not know yet and spirit had a hand in it. As in "it was meant to be". I picked up from his vibe that he was connected to spirit more than most and followed his gut. Stay positive and PATIENT---November will not be so hohum and the pace will pick up in a way you feel more comfortable with. The wheel goes up the wheel goes down. The moon grows the moon disapears--always remember that. Seasons and cycles. Embrace the down time it ihas a purpose just as much as the go time. BLESSINGS!