I have reread your responses to both my topics and I agree wholeheartedly with what you had to say. Thank you so much for that.
I was hoping that, if you had time you would be so kind as to do a reading for me employment wise for 2012.
I have a job offer to manage an establishment (Casino, nightclub and restaurant) in march it doesnt pay the greatest, but it does put me in the country I want to be in, since Maitland will also be living there. Or do I start up a Property Management business with my GF in the same country, it will be hard work but I believe we could truely make it work. Or do I seriously step out the box move to Dubai, with no work as of yet and hope I get a jb when I get there. I have an Uncle there and he says he should beable to find work for me, and I know this guy that figures I should move there, because opportunities are awesome(he also has a not so hidden adgenda of wanting to sleep with me). If I go to Dubai..I could potentially make loads of money and hopefully save loads to then move to where Maitland is. Maitland and I have talked about the Dubai option and he is like"i would never stand in the way of your progress" of course I just want him to say.."Baby, please just come be with me"..lol. But he is prepared and I suppose I am also to put relationship back on long distance if it means I'll have enough money for us to really start our lives together.
What should I do???
Between my relationship and work right now...am not loving life at all these days.
Your help would be appreciated.
Your situation with Maitland is still not clear or certain enough for you to plan your life around him. I feel the business with your GF will do very well for you. I don't feel Dubai would provide you with the sort of work or life situation that would satisfy you. In the end though, you must go with the plan that best satisfies you - and no one else.
Thanks..am going to seriously look into the business with my GF. I may take the job at the same time to atleast have some income while we start business off.
Thanks again you have wonderful insight.
Hi Captain, would you beable to do just a general reading for me. My birthdate again is August 14 1970. Hopefully there will be some additional insight as to what 2012 holds for me. Am somewhat feeling paralyzed even though I have options in my life.
For you, 2012 is all about your career, so it's appropriate that you focus your attention on that aspect of your life now. It is a great year for goal setting and attainment. It is also a year for business, abundance, and material matters. Because it is a year of personal prosperity, you are in a position to manifest whatever it is that you want in life. This is your power year, a period when you can make important strides in your life. Coming after a slow and introspective period last year, you may feel some stirrings of ambition. This is a year of big decisions and major achievements. Activity is your keynote now, and you will find yourself very much involved and occupied. Opportunities for advancement and recognition for past and current work are likely to come about during this year. You have things going for you so long as you take advantage and act. It will be easy for you to branch out and expand in a businesslike manner. This is the time to exude self-confidence and authority, because others will be receptive to your leadership and control. Your power and status potential is at a peak in 2012. Material issues, career, and worldly accomplishments will all come to the forefront. Organization is important, and monetary gain is very likely when you focus on structure and personal empowerment. During the year, simplify the areas of your life where you find yourself scattered by distractions. This is a time to practice efficiency by putting things in order and embracing systems that can help you achieve greater levels of success. Therefore, weeding out distractions will help you strengthen your foundation.
But you must not be all work - no play either. Remember to take time out too. it's very likely you may meet someone new and very attractive through your work. Romantic liaisons through your career are very much on the cards this year. Even though this is a year for improving materially, you also need balance. Make sure your playtime and work time are evenly balanced. As you create playtime for yourself, you are providing yourself with a type of nourishment that will help you stay strong, centered, and grounded. Give yourself some recognition and acknowledgment this year. Look back over the last few years, and take note of your accomplishments. Don't underestimate your life's contributions. As you value who you are, you send a wonderful message out into the universe for all to see.
Thanks again Captain. I definately need to concentrate on my work life. I do feel like 2012 is almost like a make or break for me professionally. I will definately need to remember to try and keep it balanced with relaxation time. I need to get a game plan going for myself. Will spend the next month trying to sort out , whether I start the property mgmt business with my GF. I believe it is a good direction to go in. It will be hard work but I like the challanage. Will definately keep you posted. You have been a tremendous help with advise and insight into my person and professional aspects of my life.
Thanks again for taking time to assist me with my concerns.
You're very welcome. It is a pleasure to help you.
HI Captain,well am in London. I sent BF a text last night and called this morning once I got a london cell sorted. Still havent heard from him, actually havent heard from him in i'd say almost two weeks and that has never happened before. Heck we've never gone more than 4/5 days at most with no communication. Trying not to have any expectations but it is so hard.
Do you have any more advise...at this point not sure if I can trust my own thought process. So in a bad place. I feel like just confronting him on the phone if he ever calls..or maybe I should be positive and say when he calls.
Any help is so appreciated.
Hi Captain is it possible for you to do a reading on my BF?? That way i can maybe have a better perspective of this situation. June 22 1972 is his birthday.
Your high-strung but charismatic BF can experience many ups and downs, highs and lows, especially in the area of learning to regulate and control some of his more manic tendencies and emotional excesses. Key to his success will be the ability to distinguish fact from fantasy and to control his escapist side. As a child, he probably had a very rich fantasy world - as an adult, he might not really have left it behind. At his best, he will have the gift of being able to imbue even the most adverse setbacks and circumstances with an element of graceful romanticism or mystical import. At his worst, he may allow his darker and more depressive side to gain the upper hand and become enchanted with escaping reality in any way he can - through substance abuse, daredevil antics, or martyring himself to a cause.
Both great saints and terrible sinners can be found along the same lifepath as your BF, and he will battle to keep his rather cataclysmic nature on an even keel. He doesn't have a terribly calming influence on others and is not terribly well suited to family life, so he will struggle to achieve evenness and normalcy in his relationships, especially the romantic ones. People who get on his nerves can bring out his disruptive and violent impulses almost instantaneously. Unfortunately and often fated, these people can be the very friends and family members who are nearest and dearest to him. He has a hard time knowing what is best for him and usually the very thing he most wants - excitement - is the opposite of the peace and quiet that he really needs. And his unstable but thrilling friends are the opposite of the calm, earthy people he really needs to ground him.
What he really craves deep down is a place or environment where he can be loved, accepted, doted on and safe, somewhere he can truly feel free to be himself. This can lead him to develop emotional dependencies on others who may become surrogate 'parents' for him. He is not comfortable with the more intimate or adult forms of relationship and will often spend much of his time wrapped up in his own thoughts and emotions, areas that are rarely accessible to his friends or even his love partners. However, he does need to be able to share his inner life so he must learn to build solid bridges of understanding between himself and others, and to lower his self-protective walls to let other people in. If not, he'll end up a very lonely guy, or an addict who escapes into a substance-created fantasy world because he cannot deal with the real world.
You are wonderful, you really are. Thank you again for your advise.
I agree with you as to his state of mind and it has put my mind at ease, that this has nothing most likely to do with our relationship but unfortunately, i am not sure how to let him know that he needs to speak with me. I am worrried that if he doesnt communicate with me soon, he'll feel as though he can nolonger communicate with me because he has done a good job of alienating me, which I have been feeling. As in he's done a great job of avoiding which i know he does do, (I do believe he suffers from some form of depression) but he can't find his way back. Like being lost in the woods.
I know if he could muster up the courage to speak with me, I would beable to ease his fears and help him through this difficult period in his life. AAAArrrrgghhh!!!
How do I do that? Get him to pespond. Do I just show up at his home and give him no choice?? How do I handle this. I miss him so much and I am trying not to be an additional burden, but the thought of leaving him alone is difficult.
You can't push him - you have let him know you are over there and that he can contact you if he wishes. Do NOT show up at his home - that would really push him further away. There is nothing you can do now but let him decide what he wants to do. Just enjoy your holiday and don't overthink this.
Distraction is the best method to keep from over thinking. On that note i spent the weekend with my cousin and her husband, and we went out on both friday and saturday night which was nice. I only brought this up, which is going to sound strange after all my fears and concerns with Maitland. But I met a really nice man, my cousins brother in law. There was a definate attraction(we were both very up front about our attraction), but we also got on really well. We spent both nights dancing and almost exclusively speaking with each other. He too is going through some relationship challenges, so at this point nothing would ever happen, just because it is bad timing. He even said if it wasnt for the situation he would be more than interested in exploring the possibilities. That kinda made me like him even more,cause he wasnt just going to try and do anything even though his marriage is essentially over, even though to be truthful, a big part of me would have like it to have gone further. Not sure if thats just cause I'm feeling lonely or because there could have been or be something there. I was wondering if I should continue this friendship, I do really like him as a person, then again it would be kinda like hedging my bets...I know this guy is interested. Especially with the way things are going with my BF. Sorry i cant give you his birthday date. Can you help me with this?? I always believe things happen for a reason. So could this possibly be something? Or should I just enjoy the temporary distraction??
Hi Captain, Alexis( the guy i met) birthday is Dec 26 1966.
It's good to get Maitland off your mind for a while and consider other possibilities. Even though this new guy would prove to be a difficult partner for love.
The two of you can both be very dominating and critical so together those attitudes would be magnified. Anyone in your vicinity would probably flee the room when you two entered. But you would be just as demanding of yourselves as you would be with others, accepting few excuses for unacceptable behaviour or results. A love affair between you can initially be quite dramatic, but over the years it will become more conservative, even grave or humourless. Serious effort would then have to be made either to breathe new life into the relationship or else let go and move on. Power struggles can arise in this relationship and can interfere with its flow and longevity. Alexis would want to rule your marriage, and would be a good manager, organizing and administering affairs at home. But you too like to lead and will take the initiative in the world, or try to direct your spouse in his endeavours.You would have to ensure that each of you have their own unquestioned domain in the home or that the division of labour is equitable if you want to get along on a daily basis. However, in the end, this relationship may become way too heavy and serious to be sustained. You two don't really see eye-to-eye on most things and this would be a problem. Also, you want a lot of love and attention and Alexis can be too career-fixated to give it to you.
Well will enjoy the distraction as Maitland is making me crazy. Still no news and I leave in a week. But am having a really good time.
That's the main thing! Good for you.
well I got a text from him and I qoute"I told you i had pressing issues(after i bought ticket and couldnt change it)and you better come later closer to easter.Its only tho i'm a strong person that i'm not suffering from depression.But you do the same thing she use to do and dont listen.(she being ex wife)you nod like you do then do exactly what you want. its like when you meet a woman she says exactly what she thinks you want to hear. when you met Jay(my ex) am sure you loved him the same as me, (So not true never felt this way about any man and have told him so). Now you hate him.(true, but he is a narsacistic, masogonistic sociopath. Of course didnt see it at the time, and he lied). So it will only be a matter of time when your novelty wears out for me.What kind of text is that.
I replied with " baby i love you, you are not a novelty to me, i love you more than any other man i've ever met . I understand you need time and I'm not goibng anywhere. Take your time.
Then I reread text a few times and it really pissed me off the comparsion between myself and ex, as well as himself and my ex. I really need to talk to him about all of this. I'm not sure anymore and havent been for the past few weeks if it is okay to still text him and tell him I love him etc, cause I stop all communication from my side cause I didnt want to overwhelm him. Anyways, so I call him and of course he didnt answer, but left a message saying that I loved him and if he doubted it he should reread my emails and texts to him, and that although I told him he could take his time , he did bring up some things in the text that I thought we needed to talk about and I would like to talk to him in person about that. Of course that was wednesday and its now friday and i leave on thursday next week. i'm at the point were i'm scared into inaction. Should I start texting him again like i use to telling himi love him etc. I use to send him good morning i love you texts, but i stopped cause i didnt want to overwhelm him like i said befroe. What do I do??? I understand logically what he wants and needs space and time, but emtionally I dont think i can do that, i miss him, the sound of his voice etc. I'd be all good if he'd agree to see me at least once but that isnt going to happen is it.
He's playing the victim here, something I feel really gives him satisfaction, to blame someone else for his problems. He says he is strong but he's not - a strong person doesn't send text messages to somebody they are supposedly in a relationship with who is in the same city. A strong person would have the guts to face you in person and say all this. I think he is really too emotionally immature to be able to handle a relationship with anyone at this point. Frankly he is behaving like a tantrum-throwing child. You need an adult companion. If Maitland is like this now, how much worse could he get if you were married or similar - pretty bad, I would think as he seems to have so many issues and problems with getting close.
Well, I went to visit friends today that live round the corner from Maitland. I almost went to his house...but i didn't. I am just feeling absolutely emtionally drained at this point, and totally embarrassed that I have allowed this all to happen to me. Worse of all I don't know how to switch my heart off. I get it all emotionally, actions speak louder than words, and obviously he isn't interested anymore, but emotionally i feel trapped. C'est la vie..i'll get over it. Am not sure at this point if i'd even want him back not beacause i don't love him, but because i definately wouldn't want to go through this scenerio again.
So please for the last time cause I am stubborn.
Should I try and work this out . I suppose is there potentially anything to work out. If not, am I going to meet a man that will fit the bill. Will Mr. Right for me ever show up. Or should I just move forward knowing that its just me, and that the men that may enter my life will simply just be temporary distractions.
I just don't want to end up being cynical, about men or people in general.