For the Captain
Here is the original thread
-- thanks for letting me know how to start my own I looked all around for it
my fiance 12/04/1979
and past relationship 5/5/1966 __ I had put the wrong date before.
Thank you in advance and Happy Holidays !
You and fiance: it may sometimes seem as if the two of you have come together purely for one purpose only - to help each other on the road to self-realization and to find your individual creative cores. Once you are set solidly on the left-hand path of inner growth, your relationship may no longer be necessary. The success of this work may depend a lot on your fiance's ability to keep his ego drives under control and submit to a higher authority, whether it be moral, religious or spiritual. You can be a strong influence on him in this respect, and may act as his spiritual guide in this relationship, gently encouraging him to temper his egotism and follow the path of true inner work. In turn, he can share in your courageous and creative approach to this process. Your fiance is a deeply complex person emotionally with a very big imagination/fantasy life, due to a difficult upbringing that left him with feelings of abandonment and insecurity. It can drive him to be very clingy and dependent in relationships. His expectations can be really high, demanding perfection, and horribly low (expecting disaster to strike at any moment) at the same time. He will have to guard against a tendency to deal with life through drug or alcohol-fueled escapism. Yet he is a largely positive person who tries not to dwell on the past, at least consciously, but his feeling of being a victim must be overcome if he is ever to find real peace and happiness. He has an insatiable need to find a 'security blanket' under which he can hide and feel safe but he must go out into the world and be of service to others, instead.
Your love affair can be passionate but no less in need of philosophical direction. Sufficiently pleasurable experiences may be had by both of you, but if you two take the time to explore the depths of your own feelings and contemplate the many mysteries of life, you will add whole new dimensions to your interactions. Furthermore, such investigations tend to increase the likelihood of your staying together. Marriage may come to be squarely based on a particular ideology, whether it is a formal one or a more subjective one worked out by you two yourselves. Should this be the case, you must both remember to be open to criticism and evaluation, and never cut yourselves off from the world's input. This relationship has to have a definite direction or it will simply drift without a real point or goal.
You and old flame: a melding of interests in music, dance, theatre, and design is often prominent here. This relationship stimulates extroversion, and indeed its focus may well be a fascination with performance, whether as participants or audience. In a love affair or marriage, a balance must be struck between intimacy, quiet, contemplation and extroversion. Your passionate partner may at times be a bit threatening to a milder person like yourself, yet you are quite capable of matching his sensuousness on a regular basis. The two of you may diverge when your partner takes a frank and uncompromising approach to the relationship, eschewing emotional sympathy and romance - essential qualities to you. His independent practical nature may not be all that sympathetic to your deep need to be needed. But your ability to dream may be just the ticket for your partner who can become very frustrated when his own dreams don't work out, even though he tries so hard to manifest them. He constantly tries to prove what a wonderful and worthy person he is to a world that seems to keep slapping him down or not giving a damn. At times, everything he dreamed of doing can seem like a big fat waste of time and on those days he is so disillusioned with everyone and everything that he has trouble even feeling motivated enough to get out of bed. He may go on a self-destructive bender of over-indulgence in food and other addictions that provide a delicious escape but are ultimately harmful. He wants to be different and needs a sense of mission and purpose to inspire his creative genius and get the artistic juices flowing. You can be his muse who lifts him up out of the gutter and into the sky. This guy often couches love in the guise of friendship because love scares him so much that he pushes it away at great cost. But deep down he really wants to merge with someone else's energy and feel mutual empowerment through a totally permanent commitment. He wants a partner who will take care of all his material needs and he will take care of their emotional needs - or vice versa. If he can get over his fears and stop seeking his self-worth through others, this can be a great relationship.
You yourself HL just want to experience happiness, harmony, fairness, and support with one partner whom you love. To achieve this, you must be your own partner first, getting to know yourself and doing the things that bring you joy and increase your level of self-nurturing so that you feel strong, confident and supported. Only then can you establish a healthy partnership wherein two individuals share equally with each other without feeling debilitated.
Thanks so much Captain.
It is too bad that the old flame decided that I was not someone he could take a chance on losing. He liked instead to chase 20 year old right in front of me..
The current man I love very much...he is a good man.
Your old flame is too scared to go after those he really loves. He never gets involved with those who mean a lot to him, though he craves a deep commitment. his fears are/were just too great..
How sad to live a life half lived.
When I last went to see him I was in a swimming accident and almost eaten by sharks and drowned if that did not make him move nothing ever will. I sacrificed my life to save another person that I had brought with me to the beach. If that doesn't show a person's character and develop trust what will...
He moved to another country.
I had a dream where a guide pointed for me to go away from the city he lived it was time to go.
It was strange how intuition and psychic and all of this is really only a part of it. People really do have free will to choose their destiny they can always say no. His fears cause him to be unstable as well and I do not need this in my life.
Thanks again for all your help I feel at peace with this a lot more than I did before.
Could I ask you you about my Mom 2/13/194w5? I have taken care of her all of my life in one form or another...I don't leave people. She doesn't want to move with me to my fiance's state.
I don't want to say no to this man like the ex said no to me...
It was not that your ex didn't love you - he loved you so much it scared him away because of how dependent on and vulnerable to you he felt. That triggered his fears and he ran. He has always been running from you but never forgot you.
Your mother has a deep need for material security and wants to be in absolute control of her life - and of those around her - all the time. So change for her may be terrifying, although she also secretly hates her life to be dull. In order to gain a sense of inner security that will follow her wherever she goes, she must admit to her vulnerabilities and allow other people to see them, to let others see the truth of what she is and how she feels - all her insecurities, fears of rejection and abandonment for being different, and feelings of inadequacy. Then when she risks letting others see who she truly is, she will take charge of herself on a deeper level and will gain the total safety she craves.
Your mother can be very secretive for fear of her private life being made public, yet she can also give in to every temptation, seduction, and distraction that allows her to flee the grind and routine of life that she so hates. She fears being controlled by someone else which tends to drive her to seek out greater privacy and seclusion, yet she has a terror of being lost in obscurity. Developing greater tolerance and understanding of those around her will be her first step towards higher development. Turning loose old fears and prejudices will be paramount to her growth, and such exercises in understanding will allow her to understand herself better. She must invest some time now and then to find out what makes her tick and not surround herself with people and drama so that she has no time to ponder life. If she can indulge her thirst for broader experience, acknowledge and accept her unique individuality, and allow her inventive nature full play, she can reach the heights of personal fuflfillment and happiness.
If you can reassure her and make the move away from all she knows seem more like an exciting adventure than a scary trip into the unknown, then all will be well. Still, if she is too fearful to move, you cannot hold your life back too so you have to make it clear that she would have to make her own arrangements if she wants to stay behind. She cannot expect you to give up your own life for her any more. That is just not fair to you, even if she has become dependent on you. It's her choice to go or stay, but you must go.
In all the years I have helped other people with readings and other types of help. There have been few times when I have felt by another person. I want to tell you that you have made me feel helped. You are really good at what you do.
You are an amazing loving and nonjudgemental person. God and Universe blessing to you for all that you do on here to help others in need. The world needs more people like you in this world if it is so succeed over darkness. You are an amazing way shower to the world.
Hugs Captain! May 2012 ROCK for you!
Same to you, Haunted_lady!