For AstraAngel ~ A Reading Request
To Astra Angel
I’ve read some of your very insightful readings on this forum and decided to give it a try and request a reading from you. I’m hoping to get some more information on a couple of readings I had done before, and it concerns love.
First off, and this is a little embarrassing, I want to tell you that I have never had a relationship before. Its definitely rare for my age, but it wasn’t exactly out of choice. I’m surrounded by others who are already settling down and beginning families. In fact, I’m going to a wedding of a cousin who is only a year and a half younger than me in two weeks, and over the past few weeks it has made me a bit depressed. Everyone in my family over the age of fourteen knows what its like to have that special someone, except me, and I seriously don’t want this trend to continue in my thirties (I’ll be closing in on the big 3-0 pretty soon).
I keep wondering what I’m doing wrong, and its making me worry about everything from my looks to my current financial position in life. I’ll admit I’m not a beauty (though many would say otherwise), my weight certainly isn’t anywhere near where it needs to be (been working on that), and I don’t have a job that lets me make enough to support myself without help from family, but I know people in far worse situations who’ve managed to find someone. The attitude I present to the world doesn’t put anyone off as far as I know, yet when I develop a crush on a guy, I always find out they’re already taken or they magically disappear somewhere where I can’t reach them. That actually happened to me a couple of days ago.
The people I DO attract, on the other hand, have much left to be desired. If I had wanted a fling, there were many opportunities going all the way back to high school with guys who made it clear they only wanted one thing from me. About the extent of my intimate experience has been the occasional groping by these creeps (and I’ve always made sure they never got a second chance). I’ve even had a couple of guys who seem very obsessed with me and also did not understand the concept of personal space.
So, in the end I never ended up dating. Its getting harder to dodge the questions as I get older. I also had a couple of people ask if I was ‘in the closet’, and that really frustrated me.
Okay, on to the readings.
Two of the readings I had, done a year apart, were mostly promising. Both basically pointed out that I would meet someone in the spring and that it would be a blessed union, indicating there will be a marriage. This tied into a reading I had done about a decade ago right before graduating high school. The second of the two recent readings even pointed to a specific month next year (March), and one of the qualities of this person is that he ‘walks the walk’ rather than ‘talks the talk,’ when it comes to spiritual matters. During this same reading, which included a lot of other things going on in my life, she offered to give me more information on this man I’m supposed to meet.
When she laid down three cards, I noticed swords (can’t remember if all three were but maybe two), and she slightly flinched. She went on to tell me about the good side of the reading first, so as to not alarm me, but did mention that this man has been through a lot in the past, (she called it experience, but her tone suggested it was dark). It made me wonder about what was said in the reading a year before, about this man becoming overly protective over time and a warning not to let it drive me crazy (she suggested to keep communication open).
A third reading I had done later that day by a different person was a little more ominous. She was a palm reader who also did tarot, and I was just mostly curious of what she would say about my overall life. It was mostly good, except for a couple of things, one of them being that IF I don’t wait too long, I will only have one child (I’ve always wanted a big family, around six). This made me even more curious about the circumstances of how this would happen, so for the tarot part I asked about this possible child.
Turns out this child could be someone else’s instead of my husband’s. Now what the reader told me is that there were certain things that I would have to eventually let go before I could get what I wanted, but some of it might involve delving a little deeper into a relationship with someone I’ve been attracted to in the past. She warned me to take precautions or else I’ll end up with a child, and that child would have issues with its father.
As for my husband, she was a little more frank about it and told me there were issues in this man’s past that he will be struggling with. There were other tie-ins with the other reading I had earlier that day too, as well as the part about money. Both readers indicated financial success with some sort of business, and he was an important part in making it happen. Despite all of the trouble, in all those readings I was told it would be a happy marriage.
This was totally unexpected. I never in a million years could have seen myself ending up in such a situation, and supposedly, this is going to happen soon. Money is also tied up into this, and part of the money issue was supposed to start slowly resolving itself within the next month. I’ve already have one prediction of getting enough money to start a home business coming true. At the time of the readings, I had a terrible part time job with almost non-existent hours. Now I have a much better part time job with better pay and better hours, and its only going to get even better during the holiday season. I might even end up with enough to pay part of my school loans off before the end of the year with enough to spare.
As good as it is so far, I’m still very worried. While money is finally being taken care of, the thing I want most is still not there, and I’m unsure if I should put any faith in waiting anymore. I guess I’m saying I want clearer signs on finding him and some guidance on what to do, should all of this actually come to pass. The possible future revealed to me is already tricky, but if I had some extra help, it would be easier to navigate so I can get the best I can out of it. Perhaps I would even beat the odds given to me and end up with a bigger family.
There are times when I have so much hope, then all of a sudden, its gone, and it takes forever getting out of my rut. This rollercoaster has been going on for years. I want to put a stop to it already, and just move on to the next phase of my life.
Long explanation, but I just wanted to give you plenty of information on what’s going on with me. If there’s anything else you need, just ask.
I was deeply touched by your words, your life, and what is going on with you. I will go into a reading and see about helping move you closer to your dream relationship. And a family.
First of all though, I wanted to say how beautiful your heart is, it comes out in every word you write. I hope your home business makes use of your way with words, because they are lovely. You are very skilled with telling your story, and framing out your life in a sweet way. I can tell you right now, there is a man out there who will appreciate your gifts, and there are many in you. He will love you for you and be so impressed with every day he wakes next to you. You have that coming, I feel that strong.
None of those personal challenges you feel, those struggles of self-image matter... he will see you as one complete and lovely person, beautiful within and without. There will be no difference in his eyes. He will show you the greatest respect, and will see you as an extension of his own life. A lady so perfectly sweet, caring, kind, devoted, wise where it counts, and creative, very creative... an angel in his eyes... and someone with whom he will be able to open his heart to with absolute trust.
Yes, he has had some swords in his past - a lot - and yet that has made him the man he is.... (I drew the Ace of Swords as I was reading you post) - so don't you be concerned about that, he is stronger and wiser and more loving for all of that. One thing about sword people - they have indeed walked the walk, and they know what pain feels like and what salt tastes like, and they always come out the other side some of the gentlest and most compassionate people you will ever meet.
You are a sword lady yourself, I can feel that composed, quiet dignity.. you are the Queen of Swords... very poised even when life feels like it is on a mission to hand you lemons... and you try to make lemonade and find the squeezer is broken! And then you fall on the floor in tears, wondering why life has to be that way. Well it is that way because you are learning about your companion, so you identify with him on a very deep level and connect as soul mates.
That is who he is, your Soul Mate, your Twin Flame... heaven's gift to you, because you are so lovely and deserve to find someone who is perfect for you. So your love life grows a little slower compared to others, as you are being prepared... these more exquisite lilies take longer to grow, longer to cultivate, longer to attain maturity. That is your glory... that is what makes you such a divine person.
When he appears, it will be like the sky opens up, and the Sun shines over the two of you. You will probably break down right them and there, and cry and it will be like a flood of happiness at last, a crystal river of love.
I wanted to touch on your family future... don't be concerned in the slightest about anything there...
I drew the Queen of Wands who in deck has little babies around her! More than one! So you have as many kids as you desire coming your way! Eight of Wands - Are you Catholic? How does eight sound? Maybe that is a bit too many... six? How about six? Five? At least five is what I see. Okay... maybe eight.
What else can I tell you Lily? You are looking for more details about this man? You said...
"I want clearer signs on finding him and some guidance on what to do, should all of this actually come to pass."
Well, I can tell you it IS coming to pass, quicker than you realize. What to do? How to find him?
The Fool. Look for a guy laying at the bottom of a ravine, who plummeted there after chasing his heart right off a cliff. Advice? Keep a first aid kit with you at all times. Look around for these little kits for like $10 that you can keep in your home or car. I would keep one in both locations.
You then mentioned...
"The possible future revealed to me is already tricky, but if I had some extra help, it would be easier to navigate so I can get the best I can out of it. "
How to navigate what is coming for you... Six of Coins. Find six bright shiny pennies and keep those out where you can see them, like in your bedroom. And have those arranged in the shape of an S... and every time you see those pennies, you REMEMBER that Heaven is saying YES to every dream in your heart... and you can know that you are in the arms of love, and that there is nothing that can stop your heart desires from coming to pass. It is your destiny I promise you, to experience the sweetest, closest, deepest, most intimate, supportive, tenderest, loveliest, brightest, most exceptional (like a new benchmark for the human race of what a REAL union is supposed to be), the most glorious, kindest, most compassionate, forgiving and empathetic relationship that has every been on this planet.
"Perhaps I would even beat the odds given to me and end up with a bigger family."
Lily, you are beating all the odds right now, let me tell you. You keep doing exactly what you are doing, you are perfectly on your path toward such happiness in love and life in general. Blessings in every way, materially also... Seven of Coins, which is divine abundance showered down only on certain very favored ones, who have impressed heaven greatly.
I hope that gives you some encouragement Lily...
it has been my honor to read for you... you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love, and much light
P.S. Here is a little Lily for you too...
(from the morgue file web site)
Thank you for your kind words. I carried them with me all last week while I was busy with work and getting ready for Thanksgiving. With everything going on, I didn’t think I could give you a proper response until now (I was also sick for the last couple of days), but I would occasionally come back and read what you posted to remind me.
I’m still shaky on believing it, but I want to believe so much. You have me wondering what this wonderful man looks like and exactly what kind of heartache he’s been through. I’ve been talking to God, asking to keep him safe, and perhaps, bring him to me a little sooner. If he’s suffering now, I want to be there with him.
When you described me as a sword lady, having that composed, quiet dignity, at first I had a hard time connecting that image with me, but then I began thinking about how I dealt with a lot of issues in my life. Yes, I am tired of trying to make lemons into lemonade with a broken juicer! I often ask God why things have to be the way they are and haven’t been able to get a clear answer. I hope you’re right. I hope this will help me with my soul mate. I want to see that light at the end of the horribly long tunnel I’ve been in for much of my life.
As for my future family life, you’re the first person who has given me positive reinforcement for my desire to have a large family. I’ve never understood the selfish nature so many other mothers show, who go as far as openly encouraging me to not have very many or any children at all like it was a death sentence (some would even encourage me not to marry!). I understand that it takes time and effort to raise children so they would not come out spoiled rotten and deprived of what they need most, which is proper guidance from their parents. Its shocking how many spiritually poor young adults there are in this world who continually receive little encouragement from family or society as a whole to do the right thing.
However, I’m very worried about starting such a large family at my age. I want to be healthy and be around when they all grow up and have children of their own. My mother sadly never lived to see me in my first relationship, let alone married with kids. Another reason why I really don’t want to wait much longer!
Oh, by the way, I’m not Catholic, but I do have a large number of Catholic family members. My own Godmother is one. I’m actually a Lutheran who has a lot of interest in Catholicism, thanks to my family. I’ve even done intercessory prayers a couple of times to Saint Anthony who is known as the finder of lost things. The only things I haven’t gotten back was something that was intentionally stolen and something else I received monetary compensation for from an unexpected source. One object I lost was an earring from a set that either I or my mother bought when we were out shopping. It happened less than a year after her death during an event that required me to take a backpack along. I asked Saint Anthony fro help and looked everywhere, including all the pockets in my backpack until I got home. Then I got the urge to look in one of the pockets one more time, and there it was. I actually broke down crying because I knew it was impossible!
I also have to point out that the eight of wands also showed up in two of my readings, usually meaning time was of the essence, and that I had a lot of decisions to make in a very short time. It appears that its holding true so far. I hope it means the same for my having little babies too! I’m guessing that particular decision will be coming up shortly as well.
In the meantime, I’ll be keeping my eyes open for the fool. I’ve already purchased a first aid kit from the store I work in to keep in my purse, and a second that’s technically part of a Christmas present for my sister that will be staying at the house. As for the coins, I have them laid out in the ‘S’ on a table beside my bed where I can see them every day. Now, if I can just make sure they’re never disturbed!
Waiting is so hard and scary, but if this is what it takes to get what I truly want, then I’ll endure it. Again, thank you for what you have done. You’ve more than answered my questions and gave me a renewed sense of hope. If there’s anything else I need help with, I’ll know who to turn to.
P.S. I love the lily!