Cancer and Sagittarius.. worth it!!?
ok so i am a female sag.20 and my man is a Cancer27 i have always been intrested in the astrological aspect of a someones personality so before we started dating i studied cancer a little but i can tell you it did not really tell me what i was getting myself into.
he says things to me like "dont come at me like a man" he says you are not the man in this relationship... he gets frustrated when i dont "listen" to something he asked me to do like wait a second or dont slam the door or dont lock doors.... we dont communicate well over the phone we cant "hear" each other or im "confusing" and dont you dare talk to or let anyone else in the room talk while on the phone with him ... we dont have the same taste in food.... i feel like he has the tendency to complain alot he feels like the world is against him... i feel like he throws fits when he doesnt get what he wants... he questions me lots and makes smart comments just to get a reaction but how dare i question him or say something like that ... hes alowed to hang up on me and ignore me when he wants and i am not its like certain things its ok for him to do but not me as the woman in the relationship. he threatens to do things just to spite me... he hates that i have guy friends and he doesnt like us going out without eachother. when he gets mad he gets silent.. and that drives me absolutly nuts cause i try talking to him to figure out what wrong and he stays silent and he will walk away and still not say a word and he will go sit (i call it "pout") alone. ugh that drives me nuts too.
me - i do not like to argue but i will stand up for myself.. i was raised to be a strong independent woman..i like to feel respected and appretiated. there is times when i guess i just dont know when to shut up. i do not like being "teased" in any way and i cant always tell when he is joking so i get frustrated with his "joking" sometimes. i dont raise my voice but i dont always say things the right way. i do have a hard time following directions sometimes. i am hard headed i dont always like to accept help or advice. i do want to have girls nights with out him. i want and need him to trust me. i have put a lot of emotion and feeling into our relationship and him... when he gets mad or upset with me i get worried and feel like i am failing and will try to fix things immediatly.
dont get me wrong out of the things that are bad.. we laugh alot we work well together when cooking and cleaning... we both like relaxing and reading or watching a movie... we are comfortable together we can be ourselfs and we both feel like we are IN love and Love each other very much.. we get along in the bedroom.. ... we see each other everyday even if its just to get a kiss or to fall asleep together we love to cuddle... he makes me feel confident and happy i feel safe and secure... i trust him. when we first met we were smitten with each other (i was in a relationship and he literally "swept me off my feet")
he likes to take care of me in little awesome ways... cooking for me.. starting the shower... getting my favorite candy or cereal.. going on dates... sweet text messages.. he helps me in big ways too.. we talk about everything and anything and we support each others dreams and learn about each others past and family and funny old stories. there is alot of good with us that we have and are building and we feel like there can be a future.
i believe when you care about someone and a relationship you will work threw things and not just give up. so to say that we have worked thru alot.
we both ask ourselfs how we are together... we have alot of differences and problems.. is the relationship going to work in the long run.. how can we fix some of our issues.
how am i supposed to handle his cancer traits or subdue some of them.. i hate the pouting and silence... what can i do on my end to maybe prevent the arguing or disagreements. i am not saying its all teh cancer man sagitarius women have their problems (my mom and sister are both sagittarius so i see this)
any advice or comments will be a great help with this!!
Well I am a Sag and I was married to a Cancer once ... it lasted all of six months. My friends all hated him because he was EXACTLY as you describe above and on top of that a real jerk to almost everyone who knew him. He treated me well in the beginning, I was drawn into the "witty" arguments and flirting ... but that turned sour about a week before I said I do. Should have been a red flag ... plus the fact that I was totally in love with my best friend at the time and didn't realize it. He cheated on me less than 6 months in ... my friends felt so bad about what he did and how he treated me that I never got the "I told you so speech" even though I should have. I was young and stupid ... it hurt to because I am one of the "I only wanna be married once" gals and I am extremely loyal once committed...but once he cheated I considered it over and it didn't take long for the divorce to be final after that. Now I have a man that lets me have all the freedom I want because he knows I'd never cross that line. Sag's are freedom loving and "a girl's night out" once in a while is exactly what we need sometimes ... as long as your faithful and you trust each other there shouldn't be an issue there. The fact that there is and you not even married yet worries me. Do not take the "treats" and "I was thinking of you's" as payment for your pain ... you deserve all that life has to give you and if you are not getting your needs met ... move on ... I am sure there are plenty of men out there weather you believe it or not that can do that for you. The problem is, most of us girls don't think we are worth it, we are!
funny my hubby is the sag and i'm cancer. i'm the one who is silent and walks away, he's the talker. he's type a and i'm type b that's how i look at it. I'm the realist and he's the dreamer, i'm the one who says i told you so and need to tell him what to do. I'm not mean about it, just demonstrative. i just chalk it up to being opposites and we've been married 22yr. He drives me insane at times, yet i love him dearly, so yes I think it's worth it.
Hi, I am a cancer sun female with a Sag boyfriend, I would suggest that the next time your cancer man is in a strop you try running him a bath and stick him in it still he sorts his mood out, some scented bubble bath wouldn't go amis either, orarge blossom oil helps me lift my mood, this is what my boyfriend does for me when I'm "pouting" then when he's chilled out a bit maybe you can jump in beside him ;)...........generally cancerians are clingy due to insecurity, when your out with your friends send him a cute txt to let him know that he's in your thoughts and reassure him that your not out on the prowl for another man, he's probably threaghtened by your ferosious independance and adventurous streak, cancerians need constant reassurance, it's up to you to decide whether or not he's worth the effort this involves......does your man know anything about astrology? people dont offten know there own faults, you say you both enjoy reading, maybe you could encourage him to read a bit about his sign, and yours too so together you can understand each others natures....."love on a rotten day" by hazel dixon cooper is a fun read about the romantic natures of the zodiac signs, it also has a chart to help you find your Mars and Venus signs which are probably different to your sun sign and offer deeper insight into how you behave in a relationship.......do you do tarot? I'm sure there is a spread on tarot.com for 2 partners to do together, tarot is a good starting point for conversation, communication is the key here, let him know that his silent treatment is hurting you, maybe he doesnt even realise how sad it makes you because he sees you as such a strong woman.......also tell him that you understand how frustrated he feels about communication break down, show him empathy, he needs to feel that you understand him........I hope some of this advice may be usefull to you.....all the best to you both, peace and love
freckles75 i think you are absolutely right a lot of girls don’t feel like we deserve or will ever find what makes us happy. i think my problem is i still have the little girls happily ever after dream still in mind. i want to find my one love now and stay with my one love forever. I wish you the best of luck with your new man and I hope you found all the great things you deserve. I truly hope I don’t run into the promiscuous side of my cancer
lazylisa - i wish you and your husband the best of luck in the next 22 plus years ahead. i hope that i can find a match to my personality whether it be thru differences or similarities.
liannabanana- the insecurities of a cancer do they ever go away as a relationship builds? i think the bath sounds like a good idea i can tell him to scoot off to the gym too
me as a Sagittarius i have some insecurities too i am always scared that he is just gonna up and leave. this is a fear i have in every relationship..
he says he knows he’s a crab but other than that i don’t know if he understand the affects it has on his behaviors, i think i will suggest he read some about his sign. I am definitely going to look into the book you suggested! I am worried about what my cancer will say when faced with his faults, when I try to explain how his actions affect me he seems confused and will just change the subject.
Appreciate all the feed back and I am going to use some of the advice. Anything further would help.. I am glad to see Sagittarius and cancer relationships do work.
Quick question… does the sex of a sign affect its traits… there is a lot about signs and all that I don’t understand and I do not like to pay for anything off the sight… im young and cheap. Lol