VIRGO WOMAN NEEDS HELP WITH TAURUS MAN
and yes my aunt's boyfriend got his new girlfriend pregnant right away, he then married her and now has 2 kids with her...
I've asked him plenty of times if my age is an issue for him and he has always said that it didnt matter to him. Not to say that if he meets a younger woman he wouldn't leave but he always says i have alot more going for myself than these younger woman...
We've talked about kids and how he feels about having kids. At this time of his life he's not looking to have children however if it happened he would embrace it. I've told him that even though i am older and time is limited, if i met the right person i would have another child. I am a healthy person and in very good shape and could very well have another child.
We've also talked about what he wants to do in the future and we are both very much in line... we both want to own a business and are working towards that goal.
In regards to initiating us seeing each other, he has initiated a few times but i feel like i do it more than he does...
I will fall back and see if he does anything about it.. we agreed to seeing each other every other week and this is the weekend we are suppose to see each other.. but I'm going to wait and see if he owns up to his end of the compromise. I did see him this past Sunday when he picked me up at the airport but i hope he doesnt consider that as our weekend... you think he would? Anyway, if he does not reach out to me this weekend, then i'm going to let go and just move on...i dont want to get hurt.. i just want to be happy and enjoy life...and if he doesnt want to be part of my life then the best thing is to move on...
thanks Massenger for your advice!!
@Messanger and TFF
Okay so... he owned up to his end of the deal and he just called me to confirm our plans for this weekend.... that makes me happy!!
I had a wonderful weekend with my Taurus man. He stayed all weekend and we had such a great time. We went for massages which was amazing.. went to dinner, drinks and a movie.. it was very nice to spend some quality time with him and actually do stuff together. So he left yesterday and of course i hate to see him leave because i dont know when i will see him again. haha! Anyway, i went online last night and was on facebook. he doesnt have FB but his father does. I was on there looking at pics when i came across a very interesting picture. Looks like it was taken in xmas of 2008. It was a picture of him and a girl at his cousins house at a dinner table. The other pic was in front of a xmas tree and his parents and siblings and cousin and this girl was in the picture as well. I know this was 3 years ago but because i know how much of a big deal it is to him to bring a girlfriend around his home that it made me think wow.. this girl must have been pretty special to him. So know i'm confused. As far as he has told me.. his last relationship was 6 years ago and he was hurt very badly... this picture was in 2008 only 3 yrs ago.. maybe this is just a friend and i should not think anything of it... i want to ask him about her but im not sure if i should? with the holidays coming up i wondered will he ever invite me to a family dinner? should i expect to spend the holidays without him
Congrats leoladylove...glad to hear it worked out in u'r favor...:) In regards to the photos on facebook, maybe have him over at u'r house one night, go onto facebook and then go onto his father's profile, but tell him u r just gonna check u'r facebook, and say oh I see u'r dad's profile pic, and say, I'm gonna go into u'r dad's photos to see if there r pics of him, as u think he is such a cutie pie, and wanna see old pics of him...make it as innocent as possible, even ask him if it is ok with him that u do this...make him feel like u know nothing...go to a few pics, inquire about them, and then get to those ones u have interest in knowing about....going through the pics make sure u make positive comments, say , oh how cute his hair was back them, or u'r parents look so sweet and happy, just make things up even if u have too, then get to the photos of the girl and say a few positives about the scenery, like u'r family always has great get togethers...it's nice to see, and u look young in this photo, oh who are these people in this pic, and point out his cousins first then go to the girl, make sure u don't show jealousy, or anger, sound really interested, and brush off his answer, even if it is a girlfriend, ask u'r questions, then move forward onto another pic and so on....be open, he will probably appreciate that u ask, but don't accuse, and that u'r doing so in a friendly manner, and moving through it maturly, without emotional drama...sometimes u have to draw the taurus out with questions, if he is the open type, then he will tell u everything without hesitation...men hate confrontation, so don't get to that point, and don't attack the woman in the pic either about anything like she is ugly, or something...he may not like that u do that...even though it may be over, he may still respect her...ask u'r question, one at a time, and go from each answer onto another question...and ask things like was she nice, what did u'r family think of her, did u really care for her? what happened to her and u? really listen to him...look into his eyes aswell. They r really sensitive beings Taurus's...this is also an exercise to help u two communicate openly, and gain a more trusting relationship...after viewing the photos, and talking about them, go offline and go over to him, give him a kiss, and a big hug, and thank him for sharing those intimate moments with u...and then reap the rewards!!!! :))) Have fun LLL!!
One day at a time as they say... baby steps...and lots of patients.. i'm learning.. LOL!
I've decided not to bother asking or inquiring about her. This was obviously in the past and I am going to leave it there..I thought about it really well and i think that if she was or is so important to him he will eventually tell me about her on his own. I'm not going to give it that much importance as I don't feel threatened by her and wondering and worrying about this person will only take away from being confident in who and what i am as a woman. I dont want to waste my time and energy on things of the past. does that make sense to you? i want to enjoy my time with him and allow our relationship to grow naturally without worries or insecurities, etc...
However, if i change my mind i will take note to what you have suggested.
This weekend he opened up a little more to me.. he told me about school and what he would like to do when he's done and where he would like to work. He actually asked me if i can assit him with creating his resume. He talked about having his own business and i was so happy and excited for him because he was happy and excited.. it was great to see him feel good about himself and of course i told him i would support him all the way and if he ever needed me that i would be there for him. Whether it is to type up the resume for him or do some research i could do those things for him.
He mentioned first round of interviews that are coming up for him and i suggested we go buy him an interview outfit and he just loved the idea!!
I think he can clearly see how much i like him... and i can only hope and pray that he's feeling me too..
But Massenger let me ask you..
The fact that he stayed with me all weekend and i didnt even ask him to...is that a sign that he's gradually adjusting to me? I mean i did ask him to come over on Friday night but i didnt think he was going to stay until Sunday!! hahaha!! not that im complaining at all!! lol
my daughter also told me that when he got home on Sunday he walked in so happy and was talking about what we did this weekend... the spa.. dinner and the movies... i was surprised at that as i thought he would never mention us and the things we do to his family and friend. Can this mean anything? or is it just me wishing it means something?
thanks for your advice! look forward to your response.
omg...u r getting the ring in his nose...so to speak, he is falling for u! My taurus man couldn't stop talking about me when we met, and when we did things...that is a great sign, he is feeling confident with and about u with him...:) enjoy....they love to be pampered, and us leo's are great at pampering the ones we love! Are u really affectionate with him?? Make sure he treats u like a lady aswell...for instance let him know that u love when a man opens doors for u, including car door, and pulls out chairs for u, men love direction, and he will do it, u just have to let him know how it makes u feel, and let me tell u, these small things make him feel like a man, and u like a queen! It doesn't have to happen all the time when u'r out, just when he feels he wants to do those things for u...and always thank him...also, hold his hand, in the car, crossing the street, shopping for things, walking outside together, Taurus' love touch, and so do us leos, lol, so it's perfect for both...;) The reason men are so insecure now adays is because women grew b.a.l.l.s, but forgot how to still be women, and allow men their place in their lives...never be too strong of a woman to push out of u'r life u'r man cause u don't want to allow a man to be a man in u'r relationship, this will only doom the whole relationship in the end...Men really need strong women, but not overbearing, and not too strong to make him feel that u no longer need him in u'r life...enjoy the little love gifts of holding hands everyday, those gifts will get u through tough times...
Shop with u'r Taurus, and really help him have style and classy look for the job interview...we leos are great dressers, my Taurus man definitely needed my help when I met him, now after 22 yrs he loves when I dress him, which I only do when we go to a wedding and such...make sure u let u'r Taurus man know that the hard job was getting the interview, the easy job is his personality...he will win hands down in the interview, if he is anything like my husband, he will have them eating out of his hand...my husband has an amazing ability to shine during interviews, and I always told him that....which never failed as of yet, he has always nailed the jobs and was hired! Good luck to him as I know he will be terrific aswell! Also follow up with him about how he felt he did in the interview...never, ever, celebrate until u sign on the dotted line....u don't want the emotional roller coaster ride, it's horrible, so don't do it...and just tell him the same, that u don't wanna celebrate by putting all u'r eggs in one basket, tell him u would be happy to, once he signs with the company, just alittle info we've learned in life...:) Remembering don't count u'r chickens before their hatched...so true...anyways anything u can do for him, he will definitely remember u doing...as of now, just go with the flow, it seems u'r energies r in tune...and it is a great idea not to confront him about the photos...u really don't need the drama anyways...stay away from drama, crack jokes, be playful, what I do for my husband , and he loves it, is I sit facing him on the couch, face to face, we hug, my legs are over his, and we just hold each other sometimes...it's really nice...and just initiate it, remembering Taurus's love to be directed, especially when it comes to intimacy...they love hugs etc...and this will also draw u closer together, also when u'r hugging him, throw in some tickles here and there...if u'r anything like a true Leo, we love games, fun games, tickles, playful chases...u know what I mean...just do it he will LOVE IT!! I can just see the smiles on u'r faces already!!
Yes... we love to pamper and i love pampering him!! LOL!! I am very affectionate with him and i can tell that he loves it... and of course i love it too... i sometimes think that its too much so i hold back a little not to overwhelm him. Funny this past weekend i joked with him about how spoiled i have him and he laughed and totally agreed!! i thought it was cute and i love spoiling him in all the ways that count....He is such a gentleman always treats me with the up-most respect and i always give him the driver side so that he feels like the man in control!! I am a very independent woman and i really do not need a man to provide for me and i know this can be very intimidating to men and to him because of his current situation.... So i always try to make him feel like the strong man that he is.
Yeah... he was all for the interview outfit.. it was so cute and he just loved the idea so i'm definitely looking forward to it... i just love to dress him!!!
I will be supportive through the interview process and i just know he will shine!! and look good too!! lol
We Leos do love to be playful... i love teasing him and playing with him and he always says that he loves that i'm that way with him...
Then.... i start to question myself and i think about our moments together... and my only concern is that technically we are just friends and i dont want it to get stuck there.. the fact that i was the one who pursued him.. and even though he responded slowly but surely... i'm still the one who is doing the chasing and im not comfortable with that... but i dont know how to stop... I mean he has initiated a few of our dates but not as much as i would like... he did come to me after not hearing from him in 25 days i went to his house and he didn't come out to see me and i cursed his A** out!! which i would have thought after that it was definitely OVER!! but it wasnt!! instead we talked about it and compromised. So would he have compromised if he wasn't interested? would he have compromised just for the sex? I think sometimes that i should just end it all (as hard as it is for me to do) and see if he will come back to me on his own, without me chasing and pursuing... is it worth the risk? or is this just his way and i should just continue being ME and doing what i am doing? do you understand?
thanks Massenger i really appreciate your time!!
This post is deleted!
thank you. That's funny, i just ordered Catchhimkeephim ebook by Christian carter and a have the relationship you want by Rori Rae.. that i just purchased last week. I haven't got through all of the materials yet but the stuff is very informative.
I guess i am kind of anxious in a way but i do honestly want things to happen naturally and i promise to stay busy and in control!! thank you SO MUCH!!
i will keep you posted!
I agree w/Messenger...
Affection is very important to us. We love to touch, touch, touch!
And to be touched, touched, touched
@TFF & Messenger
and I love to touch... touch.. touch!! lol
I so want to see him this weekend but i know i have to hold up to my end of the compromise... so.. i've got a to do list that should keep me very busy all weekend!! have a great one!
I have learnt a lot.
One he did not loose complete contact from his daughter since the divorce, only when he went to Australia for eighteen months, not for five years he told me.
He is not the dutiful father figure to his young son as he made out, he only bothers see him on occasions, not every weekend, not for whole weekend he does see him.
I feel as he said to his ex he didn't want him, as he didn't want the responsibility any more( there like ten yr gap between kids) Its not the child's fault.
Wife kicked him out after the mental abuse, when son was two.. he hardly pays for him. Yet he made that so she was bad person and he the good dad.
His current wife he only married last year, and i know he been looking on websites for sex since 2009.
She is big yet he said to me dont get fat, and to his ex he hates fat women, but i think the latter has him in control in some way.
When i talk to the ex, she done litterer everything even cut fat of his meat.. i though hang on any type of man would never respect you if you act like a doormat. Although to her they had great sex, it was not a marriage of convenience as he told me, then he told her his new marriage was on of convenience.
He told her a year ago he had bowel cancer but not dying.. he told me he was.
He very secretive to her about where he work and that, yet i know i know it all. that because he under estimated me, and he dont want pay the c,s,a
This i dont think is total star sign related just a emotionally damage man??
@Massenger & TFF
So he called me on Friday and asked me to dinner...since it was veterans day and he gets a discount!! lol!! i thought that was very sweet and thoughtful. I was so happy!! and he noticed.. at dinner he commented that it was really nice to see me smiling!! awww... he spent the night and it was awesome like always..i got up early and made him coffee and breakfast and surprised him with it.. he just loved it.. he had to go help his father so he had to leave but i can tell he didn't want to. he didnt leave till late afternoon... LOL!!
He shared some personal stuff about his dad and the stress he causes him and his family. We talked some more about school and were he wants to work and the things he wants to do and that he was sharing it with me was even better...
@LeoLL...Congrats,...glad to see things are working out...:) Just keep the lines of communication open and flowing from both sides...yours, and his...:)
that was a week ago and i havent heard from him since last sunday (7 days). he hasnt replied to any of my text and i tried calling once and he didnt answer...
i'm not calling him or texting him again...i'm thinking he's focusing on his family and i will probably not hear from him until after Thanksgiving...the truth is i'm not part of his world and that makes me feel bad and i hate feeling this way. I've made my own plans for thanksgiving but deep down i wished for him to be part of them.
will keep you posted!
@F F.. what you think then
@TFF and Messenger -
I think i messed up really bad.. please i need your guidance/advice..
I spent time with my Bull last night and it was amazing like always but before he left this morning i decided to ask him about that pic i found on FB (the one with the girl at his family's house. i told him i was online and came across something that made me curious and i wanted to ask him about it... so i showed him the picture.. he was shocked even looked nervous so i said to him that knowing what i know about him i'm guessing she was very special since she'sin his world with his family. anyway, he said she was never a girlfriend and she lived in Germany and that was way before he even heard of me. i told him i was just curious. he said she came to germany to visit.. so of course, i couldnt stay shut and said wow u must be really special to her to come all the way from Germany to see you. Well, i guess he noticed that it really bothered me. i asked him if he still has contact with her and he said yes. I didnt even know how to act, i was nervous and hurt but i know i shouldnt because he was being honest with me and i have to respect that. But my emotions got the best of me. so we get ready to leave and we get in the car and that's when i just couldnt keep shut... I told him that i thought i needed to stay away from him for some time because i wasnt sure about how i was feeling. he said "okay" like nothing.. i told him that i really liked him and wanted to be with him but i didn't like the way he treated me. That the vibe i was getting makes me feel that he's just not into me. I told him that booty call stuff is just not me. He said he understood and okay. he said he felt like he should say he was sorry..and that was it, gave me a kiss on the cheek and he left.. like nothing...
I dont know what got into me i'm devastated right know.. not sure how to take this that i created! I dont want to let him go... i'm soo in love with this man i just want him to love me back! but you cant make someone love you. ...
thanks ladies for listening..
okay, i have new developments.. i asked his brother to tell him to call me.. and he did.and .he met me outside of the house. I told him i enjoyed our time this weekend and i didn't like the way things ended and wanted to tell him in person. I Told him that i had seen this picture a while ago and i didnt want him to think this was about a girl in a picture that was 4 years ago and that the topic of the picture only came up because i needed a way to talk to him about what i was feeling. The truth is the only problem i'm having with him is just the amount of time and attention that he gives to me. He said he was sorry but that he has to get his stuff together and that he couldnt give me everything! i told him i didn't want everything just his time and attention. I told him that i loved him and will always be there to support him and encourage him. he said some beautiful things to me and he kissed me.. he said that maybe it was better to leave things like i said because it hurts him when i hurt.... isnt he just the sweetest!! he said maybe we should think about things for a few days and we can discuss later and that he didnt know if there was a compromise that could be made but we should think about it. He kept kissing me.. he was tender and sweet and very understanding.
what do you think?
your advice is greatly appreciated!!
Leolady...I am going to process this for awhile. That is what we bulls do. Do you see what i am saying???
I know I can communicate like no tomorrow, except sometimes when it comes to how I feel. For me, that is mainly due to the rejection i have had in my life.
But I do still process everything. I can be slow at that sometimes too. It has nothing to do with the person, it is my own inner process. That I think is similar between all of us bulls.