Could really use a reading...please

  • I feel like I'm having the worst year ever. Any idea when things will start to lighten up so I can be happy again

    Birthday May 29, 1981

  • When will you be happy - there is not set date - just as soon as you remove the issues that are causing your unhappiness.

    Your profile reveals what you want most is to receive love. Are you getting enough? It is not from other people but from yourself that you most need to receive it, so try to be your own best friend first. Being a Gemini, you may try to run away from your other 'self' or dark side just to prove you have a separate identity from family and siblings. But eventually you will come to realize you ARE half of your other half. Feelings of anger or inferiority or rejection must be faced and not ignored or run away from. Dig into your past because something early in life with regard to groups or clubs or cliques of people may have left you scarred and hurt and may be impacting negatively on your present life.

    Your 'mission' here is to observe and document the antics of human beings whom you may never completely understand but whose language you must master, mainly because your goal is not just to gather information but to disseminate it in any form or medium you choose. You are the journalist, the photographer, the chronicler/writer, the artist, the inventor, the innovator. Communication is your natural forte. Just try not to intellectualize everything - record your feelings about things and events and people, as well as your thoughts. Do not fear that you are stupid or crazy - you have the ability to articulate and communicate on the highest levels, using not someone else's ideas but your own. You have ambition, a drive for success, and a powerful mind, maybe even bordering on genius. Money is one of the central themes of your life path - you may have to pull yourself up by your bootstraps but great wealth and influence can be yours. Only self-doubt can hold you back.

    You are here to choose a field of endeavour or a craft and, through years of disciplined and determined effort, to become an authority in your field. Blessed with brilliance, you grasp things so quickly that you often may move from one topic to the next, avoiding the painstaking groundwork of thorough preparation. You must rely less on your own cleverness and set about gaining the perspective that only serious study of all facets of a subject can give you. Only then can you hope to bring a unique point of view to the world. Moreover, you are called to find principles or points of view in which you believe. Through identifying with principles or connecting to something greater than yourself, you not only fulfil your individuality but come to understand it. Your many years of solitary study or work on your craft will also provide the forum for many deep insights into your own nature. Your core lesson is to choose and identify with a principle or viewpoint, and amend your tendency towards restlessness and boredom. Your goal is to understand who you are by dedicating yourself to a chosen field of endeavour, using your gifts of an unusual personality, your love of truth, and your passion.

    The self-imposed discipline and scholarship called for by your lifepath is likely to be a bit difficult for you to achieve, however. Though brilliant, perceptive, and perhaps even technically gifted, you will have to battle the demons of distraction and dilettantism until you learn to settle down, buckle down, and apply yourself to a more thorough knowledge of a particular field or area of study. Rebelliousness will also be a problem and an exceedingly low frustration threshold can hold you back from a higher level of expertise. If you can control your impatience, finish what you start, and understand that there is also a great deal of personal freedom and inner peace to be found in dedicated concentration, you will discover much about yourself in the course of your life's journey. Your challenge is to know when it's time to stop talking and start listening. Your reward for doing all this will be to gain the respect of others for your serious efforts - and after all, isn't the acceptance of your peers something you crave?

  • You are amazing. Thank you so much

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