Alright AstraAngel! Whatever Heavens wants!
1- we talked about a lot of different things. We talked about a lot of social issues that were going on at the time, especially Norway. We also had some really random conversations about fake trees and star wars. And then of course we talked about where he lives and his hometown. We shared some good laughs and it wasn’t awkward conversations. We seemed to keep it going. There was never a really long period of no talking.
2- we went to the mall nearby the Port in Long Beach. It was a nice mall. We hung out from 10 till 1.
3- he needed to do some last minute shopping before he went home, so we went around the mall picking up stuff he needed, and then afterwards we got coffee and sat down to talk.
4- I was VERY pleased with how the date went. For not really having any time alone together, and not really having any real discussions, I was extremely happy that we were comfortable with each other and enjoyed each other’s company. I was worried that since we don’t really know each other, it would have been a disaster but it went really well, in my opinion.
Besides that, I thought that he was very chivalrous and acted like a gentleman. He opened doors for me, pulled out my chair, and didn’t do any rated R touching or forced me to do anything. He kept it PG…just getting close to me, holding me to him, leaning in to whisper in my ear things that would make me giggle, guiding me with his hand on my back. I didn’t initiate any touching, so it was all on him….and usually (from my experience) guys don’t really need to touch girls they don’t like. He wasn’t forced to do anything, and yet, he was touchy with me. When we went into stores, people thought we were a couple.
He also kept mentioning to me that I “impressed” him and that I was different from most girls because he expected me not to talk about social issues or even like star wars. I surprised him, I think in a good way.
5- Of course he did! I remember very vividly one particular thing he said. We were walking out of a store, and he graps my arm and pulls me close to him and whispered in my ear, “and now, I’m going to get you something sweet. I remembered.” It really struck me because he must have remembered that on the cruise I only really ate dessert and nothing else. I was shocked that he remembered such a minute detail that I didn’t even tell him about…and I hadn’t been on the cruise for about three weeks when I saw him again. I don’t know…it struck me.
And of course when we split up at the end of the date, he really seemed genuine when he said “I really want to see you again when I return to the USA. You can always e-mail me.” And wished me luck in school, and the nice hug at the end. The way he said it to me made me really believe he was sincerely serious and wasn’t joking. I guess we’ll see.
6- ahhh! That is one tough question! I have been in unrequited love so many times in my life, that I’m sure if I went back and looked at all those guys, I would say “He’s the one!” I’m so young, and so naïve. I’m a college student, trying to figure out how to achieve my dreams. It’s hard for me to say, “Nick is the right guy for me” when I don’t really know him…and when I try to make an effort to talk to him, he doesn’t respond. I do think that he’s different. I’ve never been so determined to get a guy before in my life. I’ve never seen this tenacity in me that I do now. It scares me! But yeah, I mean….if I did get the chance to get to know him, I’m sure he would be “the one” maybe. It’s a tough call when I hardly know him.
Does this help? Sorry it’s quite a bit of reading.
gentle bump back to the first page. Hope all is well.
sorry, my super long post from your questions was on the last page! I'm sorry you have to go back a page and read it.
Thank you for all that. It unlocked a lot for me.
I think I have your answer. He really does like you. He also loves his freedom though (he works on a ship which is a symbol of adventure and freedom, like the Navy). You remember that we talked about how he has probably met and dated plenty as he is in a very social situation and has lots of opportunity. My sense is that he is intentionally ignoring your emails and will contact you once he returns to the USA. That was how you left it on the date. Had I known that I would have admonished you to not email him at all. No harm done though as long as you keep the faith. I think he does not want to get into a back and forth, on and on, email thing. He likes his relationships low key. Comfortable. Maybe he is not into the internet and computer stuff so much.
So you are advised to relax and keep the faith that he will contact you again when the time is right. In other words, there is no point in digging into his personal space, and the angels led us in a big circle there on this, until the readings were tailored to show that maybe he had another relationship already (which I don't believe now is the case. It was something the angels arranged to sort of shock us both as that was never in the cards before.) That prompted us to examine the date and then that leads us now to your course which is to relax and not worry about him. You had a wonderful date! He like you a lot! Rejoice! You have everything, no matter that he hasn't replied to you by email. There is no rule anywhere that states that people have to reply by email.
Hey, you know what would be really cool and would speak volumes to him... you take some time this weekend and shop for some little trinket (does't have to be much) that says in some way SWEET right back to him. Maybe its a little toy boat, or a figurine of a mermaid... whatever you like) and MAIL that to him while he is on the ship. Figure out how to do that. And a nice note, very low key, something like, "Wishing the very best to the sweetest waiter in the world. peace and love, DaniBo". You see? That is a gift that says no stings attached. Emails can sometimes feel compelling, like you HAVE to reply. And he may not like being backed into a corner there that he has to reply. Anyway that thought occurs to me. I tell you what, were I a waiter on a ship and somehow received a little gift like that from a lady I liked, I would be crying. That completes the "sweet" thing going on between you. I believe this is an idea from your angel, and angels are the greatest matchmakers in the Universe!
I didn't want to start down the college/nursing thing until we had reached some conclusion on the waiter situation. Does this make sense? This takes some faith and effort on your part, however i believe you are strong for that. And would represent a quantum leap in the way you understand relationship. Once we reach agreement on this and you understand your path, then we can move on to your schooling.
I know heaven has something really beautiful planned for you, hang tight, keep the faith, believe in true love, and all will go so wonderfully for you! I am keeping you in my prayers. And you have a wonderful weekend DaniBo!
Wow. I’m glad that you’ve sensed this! I’m always so preoccupied with worrying that he didn’t like me because he never sent me an e-mail back. I was always worried I did something wrong on the date to make him think, “This girl isn’t for me!” But yes, I do recognize that he likes his freedom.
I’m just hoping that he’s actually intentionally ignoring my e-mails because he doesn’t want to start this whole annoying e-mail conversation. I’m so desperately hoping that when he returns (whenever that is!) that he will try and find me. I don’t want to wait and wait if in reality, he wants nothing to do with me, you know?
However, I do agree with you. I don’t know when he’s coming home, but I understand his reasons for not e-mailing me back. He also does seem like the kind of guy who wants some space. I really hope I haven’t angered him or scared him off by sending him those two e-mails!
But I am relieved to hear that the possibility of him not having a girlfriend has gone higher. I don’t know how he could maintain a relationship when he’s away from his homeland 9 months out of the year!
I wish I had his address on the ship, but I don’t. Maybe when he comes back to the USA, he might give it to me, so that I can mail him something while he’s back on the ship.
I’m just…trying to figure out how to keep my mind from creating ideas. If you sincerely believe that he likes me, and that he WILL contact me when he returns God knows when, I will try my best to believe you! : )
I feel like until I hear from him again, I’m going to have trouble believing he actually cares, you know?
I do care a lot about my academics and nursing right now though. So I guess I’ll lay off on Nick for a while! Because I do want to hear what you have to say about school. I’m so stressed out about that right now.
Ugh, AstraAngel. I’m just worried about the time. When is he going to come back? It’s already September! I guess I’ll just have to wait around. There’s nothing else I can do but pray he’s over there in Europe thinking about me.
I hope so much that he cares, AstraAngel.
And I hope my schooling will go as planned too!
What other insight can you give me about Nick and school? My two priorities at this moment.
Have a wonderful Labor day weekend!
Sorry for the long post, AstraAngel. I just...I'm getting worried still that he's not going to contact me when he returns? how do I know for sure that he cares about me too, and how do I know he'll really contact me? My anxiety has started up again.
And....about school too. I'm so stressed. I feel so overwhelmed right now. I'm worried i'm going to crack, and not make it!
Again, I'm so sorry AstraAngel. I'm always bugging you about something!
but a bump back up to the top I hope you're having a lovely three day weekend. I'm sorry if my latest posts are confusing. take your time
another gentle bump to the first page
Let's see... your best path at this point with the waiter is to let it rest. You have done what you felt like doing to try to connect again. I would show heaven that you will have faith and trust that they know what is best for you, and you are happy with whichever way things go with him. I personally think you should focus totally on yourself, and your schooling and get that going... and then in the right time some other "nice" things will come alone in the divine right timing. RIght now you should stay centered on your own heart, and not let speculation about Nick become a source of anxiety for you.
What I woud suggest is when you do think of him, simply say a short prayer wishing him well. That is a sign of a true "higher" love. When you care enough about someone that no matter that you never hear from them, or anything happens, and you still have feelings, you channel those feelings as wishes or a prayer on their behalf. I know this from experience, someone I was very close to, and still am, things didn't work out, and it broke my heart, yet there was nothing I could do. However the love i felt for this person was so strong, and so undeniable, I simple lifted them up in prayer and wished the absolute very best for them. And you know, to this day, I am convinced I have a WONDERFUL relationship with them, even though our connection is purely spiritual, there is no outward communication. I left it in the hands of heaven. At some point the relationship becomes a spiritual union, where even when you are apart (and may never be together) there is still a connection. In other words you still have the feelings, yet instead of agonizing "when oh when will mr or miss X work out or call?"... you pray for them instead, send nice wishes their way... and that is that. Then, you keep your life open for anything to happen, could be then that one day works out physically, or not... you aren't freaking about it anyway. And who knows, maybe when we are all in heaven, then you run into them and then you are together completely. (and heaven is a lot closer to us all than we realize!)
I drew the Four of Cups which in my Caselli deck shows a disenchanted person sitting in front of three cups and a fourth is being held out to him from heaven. This card came up twice for you as I was pondering your situation, and I was wanting to read on your schooling. However I could sense strongly that the Universe was still trying to convey something important for you. My feeling is that you are being asked to stabilize yourself emotionally in this matter, and not let this (or any) emotional situation overwhelm you, or cause you to be distracted from other areas of life (like college). Has this been a recurring pattern for you in relationships? This card could be a sign that it is time for your to ask your self why this is happening. Have you found yourself in similar love situations in the past?
That seems to be where we need to go next should you desire to continue. This matter needs to be understood for what it is, before we can move on to your schooling questions. I don't have a liberty to continue answering questions like, "what does he think of me, will he email etc..." there is something here of a more fundamental nature that your heart needs to understand before we can continue. Otherwise he will keep popping up in questions and we go around in circles and never get to the root of the matter. It may be a life lesson, something important to understand.
I know that may not be what you were wanting to hear, nevertheless, you are learning something very beautiful here as long as you hang in there.
I am sending peaceful and happy thoughts your way, Danibo.
You hit it right on point yet again. I DO tend to let myself get distracted and lost inside of this fantasy world sometimes, and I spend A LOT of my time thinking about how I want things to be, and how they aren’t happening. Those thoughts tend to consume my mind to the point where I really don’t want to do anything but just sit and think.
I have been in SOOO many similar love situations, where the person I care about and desire with all my heart, either doesn’t care about me in the same way, or I can’t see (like Nick!), and it drives me to the point of insanity. I have trouble thinking of anything else, or even doing anything else but thinking “why can’t this work out for me? What’s wrong? How can I change this?” And then, by this point, I spiral off. It has happened to me so many times that by now, I’m used to it. But I’m sick of this worry and anxiety controlling my life! I want to care about Nick AND focus on school, but that seems like too high of expectations for a girl with my anxiety issues.
What am I supposed to do? This apparent reoccurring pattern in the readings you so kindly do for me are definitely sending me a signal: that I need to focus on school and put Nick on the back burner until he returns home! But how?! I’ve tried and tried and I can’t figure out a way to put him in the back of my mind!!!
I want so badly to see what’s in store for me academically and professionally. It’s just…ugh. It’s overwhelming to worry about that and be so focused and determined to just get back in contact with this great guy…. especially when I’ve never had someone to love for myself, you know?
The two things I want most in my life are conflicting at the same time. I’m worried I won’t be able to put enough attention into both of them…I NEED to do well in school, BUT I also want to spend a little time thinking about Nick so he’ll somehow feel connected to me.
(And now….I’ve got this cute guy at school….I don’t have a big attachment to him, but at least he makes me excited to go to my dreary three-hour human anatomy lab! I’m already wondering what he thinks about me. That’s terrible isn’t it?)
I totally see this reading as a sign….but how do I stop my mind from turning?
School…Nick….school…Nick….school….Nick. It’s exhausting!
Well, I hope that reading that you’ve been attempting about my schooling will go through now. I just need to figure out how to stop Nick from entering my mind while I’m trying to get educated! I completely understand what Heaven is trying to tell me…but how do I go about doing that?
I just want to become a successful nurse, and marry a great guy. Is that too much to ask for in Heaven’s eyes?
These past couple of days after posting a response to your last post, I started thinking....and I've been thinking about what you and I mentioned in our last two posts.
For some odd reason, ever since I read your post, my mind has completely flipped around! I've finally got school to be my number one priority. I always said it was, when it really wasn't. I was definitely more focused on Nick (and the two other guys i've been thinking about...the guy at school, and another guy at another school that i've known for years) and really just wasn't focusing.
Now, that's changed. I seriously think Heaven and your reading might have changed something within me!
Although I still think about Nick (and about those other two guys) they don't consume my thoughts. Nick either will get back to me or won't...and he's not coming home till October, so there's really no point in me worrying about him when he obviously isn't worrying about me in Europe. If he was, he would have made some sort of effort like I did to get in contact with me. So he's whatever right now.
I just....I really want to be a nurse. that's my dream job. My lifelong goal.
So please, AstraAngel. I would appreciate your help in guiding me along this academic journey. I know I've been so focused on Nick this entire time, but things have changed for the better. I can't waste so much time on him when school needs to be my first priority!
So if you see anything good for me in the cards about getting into the nursing program this year, let me know! I'm so nervous about this whole process.
And well...i know it's bad that I'm still thinking about Nick (and that REALLLY cute guy at school!) but I guess that will always be a little distraction for me.
Thanks. Have a wonderful weekend.
Another quicky: there was this guy that I was practically in love with, and well, about a couple months ago, I decided to move on because I felt so hurt by him.
But now, I'm reconsidering. I want to see what could happen with this guy. I've known him for three/four years....but I miss him terribly. I was really considering to go try and get back in contact with this guy.
Is it worth it? I still haven't been able to completely forget about him. I want to know what could happen if I re connected, and if he misses me as much as i miss him.
Wow! You are really making some significant progress! It is like another person just stepped into you, and this person really sounds like someone who has still has their heart in the clouds of love, however now your feet are planted firmly on the ground. Good for you! I also was (at last) hearing some passion in your voice about your nursing. I was actually beginning to wonder "Is DaniBo really excited about this nursing thing?" I can tell now that you are, and that is a fantastic development, at least now I can focus my efforts on passing along what I am hearing about your schooling without wondering, "is this really the right direction for DaniBo?
Okay, so the relationship issue does sound like a little bit of a pattern! That is great news actually! It is consistent so we have something to work with.
You asked "why can’t this work out for me? What’s wrong? How can I change this?" and "What am I supposed to do?"
I drew the Six of Sword - this card is a card of movement, intellectual and mental mostly. I have the feeling that part of the issue is that you are almost expecting this pattern to repeat itself which sends your mind out there wondering, imagining, stressing sometimes about something that is really out of your control. every time you enter a relationship. The passengers in the six of swords are not paddling themselves they are letting themselves be carried along by some dude who is steering the boat. That is an excellent mental picture for you. Why? Because in that place you can only rest and let the Universe work things out. YOU are not responsible to make your relationships work out. YOU can't make someone else treat you the way you would love to be treated. Your place is to EXPECT that Heaven is going to bring someone wonderful for you in the perfect time, however that time has simply not occurred yet. Until then your priority should be yourself, taking care of yourself, your mind, body, emotions, spirit, and leave the rest in the hands of your angel(s) to work out. Believe me, the Universe know what is best for DaniBo, and when you rest and show confidence in that process, then your angels send word upstairs, "hey she gets it!" - and that can only speed up the process of bringing an angelic man in to your life. As long as you are fretting and concerned about matters in relationship then chances are not too much is going to change. Does that make sense. So to answer all of these questions, Why, What, How and What? is absolutely NOTHING. Do nothing, relax, enjoy your life as it currently is, focus on yourself, have fun, hang out and relax. I suspect that your prospective partners may sense a little anxiety in you, so there is an instinctive response to give you space, and then that causes you to fret a little more (why isn;t this working out!) and then they distance themselves even more. It is kind of a law of relationship I think. The word here for you is REST - the Six of SWORDS.
It also wouldn't hurt you to go another cruise and the next time vow you are NOT going to meet anyone, you are simply going to have fun, eat desserts, play shuffleboard or whatever it is that people do on ships. Outside of the state rooms anyway. Find some plastic fake wedding ring to wear so that you (maybe) defuse the attraction thing with the waiters. You see? Then you are really building up confidence in yourself, and instead of falling for someone else, you fall for the most wonderful person you are ever going to know - yourself! That was a round about way of saying LOVE YOURSELF and in that attitude builds your self esteem, and next thing you know, your phone is going to be ringing off the hook for dates, and you get to pick and choose a little. You see? You are no longer worrying about what Mr so-and-so did or didn't do, you are relaxed, confident, and the guys sense it and it drives them nuts. That is where you want to be.
For now though, go to the library or Barnes and Noble and find a good novel to read.
Your mind starts drifting back to Nick, or Mark, or Bob, or Carl, or whoever it is that has your eye, pick that book up and start reading. Do you see? Now even though your emotions are still there and your are feeling "God, I could sure use a boyfriend!" your mind is guarding your heart and you can then REST. And read some more.
I need your birthdate to compile a chart for you, that will answer a lot more about you. I can't believe we haven't done that yet. Very important. A lot of insights that can help you there.
Your heart has definitely been leading you around. The thing about your heart is, you want to protect it, however you also don't want to ignore all of these great feelings you have about love. The answer there is to believe in a GREAT LOVE FOR DANIBO and not believe in all of these guys. Guys will let you down... they won't call or whatever. YOUR BELIEF in a fantastic love relationship where it is so sweet and you are really flowing back and forth with mr right, will NOT let you down! You see, that I believe is what Heaven is trying to get across here. You are in a Heavenly Class of Romance and Relationship and it is the Universe that is teaching you what would be a wonderful love for you. So the, your focus shifts from the guys to what YOU want from a love relationship. Then your ideal of love is built within you, then your expectations increase and increase, and you are determined to wait until something wonderful comes along and you will know it when it does. I know Nick seemed like "it" to you, however I am starting to realize that Heaven has been working with him, in order to work with you in this area. Does that make sense? So Heaven works on his heart to not call you, and he doesn't know why. He simply senses to leave you alone, and then you go through some pain trying to figure out what the heck is going on... and then hour concept of relationship deepens and deepens while you are alone!
Well, not really alone. We are never alone. We each have an angel companion (your "guardian" angel) who never leaves you. Right now, even though you can't see him, you actually have the man of your dreams so close to you... your angel... and I can tell you he is madly in love with DaniBo. (King of Pentacles - reversed) - and there He is. A king of love there right beside you, right now as you are reading this. The KING of PENTACLES is a man of means. He can twitch his little finger and bring a lot of happiness and material security your way. To be honest, He is where your heart should be focused.... then in the right time, He will manifest as a guy that will sweep you off your feet and you will be in seventh heaven!
I believe you are in the midst of such a transformation in your concept of relationship. Your angel has been managing your relationships to help you find HIM, a beautiful spiritual being. I know that may sound a little out there, however, not really. Because we are all spiritual beings, the only difference between you and your angel, is that this go around you chose the material form, and He chose the spiritual. Maybe next time you trade places, and you get to be the angel. Anything goes in Heaven DaniBo. I do sense that you are surrounded by a lot of angelic energy right now, it is very beautiful, and once you see these things, you will never be the same. I believe it is part of your ascension growth, you are stepping into heavenward love and that will turn your life totally around in the love area.
I know I am hitting you with a lot to read, somehow this feels important to me to say to you tonight. I feel you are ready... you sound a lot calmer and ready to open your heart to "other possibilities".
I would try to keep Nick out of your thoughts right now. Or should you really find yourself dwelling on him, discipline yourself to say the Lord's prayer and add our Heavenly Mother in there too... Our Father and Mother who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name... thy kingdom come THY WILL BE DONE... and then let it go... talk to heaven about your feelings for him, talk to your angel, keeo the dialog between you and something above, and that way your energies are focused where they need to be, above instead of someone down below. Below is nice when it works, however it is not where our focus should be. You are spirit being who chose to come into this life in a material body... your true parentage and origin is in Heaven. I know.... "Hey, I only wanted a bf, not all of this spiritual mumbo-jumno... well I will tell you DaniBo, there are a LOT of broken hearted people going to bed tonight in messed up relationships because the focus of the partners is on one another instead of where it should be, in HEAVEN. You do the work of spirit in your life, you seek what is above first and foremost, and I PROMISE YOU before you know it you will find yourself in the most wonderful intimate close sensitive intuitive caring and kind relationship with a man that you can ever imagine.
I have ben wanting to say these things to you since the beginning of this thread almost it wasn't time before. Now it is time.
So now, we should be able to look at your schooling more. I honestly don't have to pull cards for it though, although I can should you like me to. I can tell you without the Tarot that your college is going to go great as long as you can stay focused on your classes and not on the cute guy at the next dissection table. How in the world can you even begin to think romance while you are exploring human anatomy? Are you like cutting into cadavers? I would have a hard time feeling romantic while looking inside of whatever.
Ace of Pentacles tells me you need to buy some blinders like horses use, and keep your face in the books and in the class and not on the cute guy. He is not going to help you make better grades. You are wondering what the new cute guy thinks of you in anatomy lab. I can tell you that he is probably thinking the same thing about you. Do you really want to go there? Let's say he comes up to you after class one day...
Him: "Hey DaniBo, how about coffee, tea or me after class?"
You: "Sounds good I will meet you and we can do... whatever!"
Will that help your class focus? Say it gets hot... intense... now you are cutting class to meet up with him for... whatever... and then you don't even care about class anymore... you are meeting him every day for... whatever. and lets say things really get going and you two are now living together... and it is fun, however your class marks aren't as stellar as they could be... so anyway, you graduate and instead of getting the best job at the best hospital, you have to settle for the night shift at the local clinic. Do you see? Your focus needs to be 100% on YOU and YOUR FUTURE, and in the right time love will come for you after you are settled into your career. I would strongly urge you to force yourself to stay excited about your schooling... develop that relationship with your angel who loves you. You can't get into trouble there! Your angel will not lead you wrong, and will help you stay focused on your schooling.
This Ace also is a confirmation that you have only positive and materially successful days ahead in your career, you are on the right track and doing really well!
So, bottom line, stay focused on Spirit and school, and you will do great. And buy a great novel once in a while. Have you read anything by tess gerritsen? She is an MD author and writes some pretty incredible medical thriller/sci fi stuff, that you might enjoy since you are in the medical field. Either that or it will shock you out of the medical field lol. Just kidding.
I need a night time card for you... something nice, extra charge....
The HERMIT - well that is a nice way to close this out daniBo and verifies all that we have covered... Your best path is the Hermit mode right now.... I can guarantee you that the Hermit is not looking for a date... he is looking above, he is looking for truth and maturity and composure. He is not surfing all of the dating sites like a lot of people. Your life is too beautiful to let it be compromised by a relationship in which you end up stressing out, wondering why he hasn't called emailed etc.
I also believe the Hermit is someone you already know, someone very special who loves you with all of his heart, someone divine and mature and supportive of all that is in your best interests. Someone you love as well, although perhaps you have not understood that divine kind of love yet. You will though.
The Hermit could very well be your angel saying "Good night my darling DaniBo... and sweet dreams...
...of anatomy class."
Oh and your question about the guy from your past...
"I was really considering to go try and get back in contact with this guy"...
I think hew falls into the same boat as the six of swords and the other guys you have been dealing with... are you SURE you want to go there? Sure you could spark up something, i don't think you need that right now... He is not calling you... i would let it rest... Have you ever seen the movie Apocalypse Now? WIth Charlie Sheen and Marlin Brando. There is this one part in the movie where the guys in this little Navy boat get out of the boat and go ashore and end up getting chased by a tiger... and all the way back to the boat the one dude is screaming to himself as he is running "Never get out of the boat! Never get out of the boat!"
I feel that is your best course right now, don't get out of that six of swords boat. Rest. Read. Do ANYTHING by yourself, see a movie. Don't go calling some guy from your past... you might end up getting a tiger by the tail and do you really need that?
Hey if you were not in college and just working and looking for some fun, I would say go for it. You are in college and you have a lot at stake for your bright future as a nurse. Take care of yourself and take a REST from the guys. Hey its not like there is a shortage of them DaniBo. When you get out of college and have that great job as a top paid nurse, there are still going to be gazillions of guys out there... they aren't going anywhere. You need to protect yourself and get your degree.
I wish I had had someone giving me this same advice when I was in college!
Thanks for all the great advice. I’m glad that you also notice this BIG change within me. I think it’s going to benefit me immensely as I continue on in earning my nursing degree!
If you have time, maybe you could pull some cards to see if A- I’m studying properly (I got a C on my first microbiology quiz! I was really upset after my long study session!) and B- if I’m going to make it into the program this year ( really don’t want to spend more than 4 yrs! I’m going to a private university…so you already can guess how much that is costing me!)
But yes, I totally agree with everything you’ve said. I really need to stop thinking about Nick so much….I guess when October rolls around we’ll see if it’s really meant to be. If not, I’m sure I’ll meet a hot doctor later on in life hopefully.
But I can’t help but wonder throughout the day “What’s Nick up to half way across the world? Hope he’s thinking about me”
I’ll try to not get distracted by the cutie in my lab. He does appear to be rather conceited. But hey, if he makes me excited to go to class, then what the heck! I’ll use him as motivation. Although maybe a kiss from him wouldn’t be unbearable! Haha.
(And no cadavers yet. Right now we’re learning bone structure! YAY!)
I do hope my angel is watching my back. I’m sick of getting myself into these terrible love situations. Heck, this angel better find me a good husband after putting me through all this disappointment.
I guess I’ll steer clear of any more romantic drama. I’ll forget about Nick until he contacts me again, I’ll try and not look at the cutie in my lab, and when I go visit the place where the guy from the past, I’ll try and not flirt with him.
I want to be a nurse so badly that I’m willing to put that aside for now. I know my future Nicks will have to appear sometime, right? I just feel kinda old for still never being kissed by a guy (yes, it’s true!) and never having a boyfriend (although it seems rather stressful)
I’m so glad that you’re helping me through my transition from the old DaniBo to the new one. Without your guidance, I’m sure I’d be completely lost!
And I’ll try and stay in the boat for now. Hopefully I won’t consider abandoning ship anytime soon.
PS – my birthday is September 25th, 1993
(It’s coming up pretty quick!
Over this past weekend....my mind has drifted back into a place where I don't want it to be: NICK!
As I mentioned in my last post, I am super nervous about school right now. I am very very frustrated with myself for allowing my mind to think about him ALL weekend when instead I should have been doing what you've told me by doing other things to keep me occupied.
I am seriously worried that this is going to keep happening, and I won't be able to keep him off my mind. I'm having so much trouble putting him on the back burner right now. Why is this happening?
I can't stop wondering the same usual questions: "Will he call me when he returns?" "Is he messing with my mind?" "has he forgotten about me?"
I'm really sick of this, AstraAngel. Last week, I was totally not even thinking about him, and then something happened this weekend that made me think of him...and now I can't stop!
I know these questions that I have will NEVER be answered until he comes back...but I really want your help with school right now, and all I can think about is Nick.
I hate that I keep flip-flopping back and forth. I miss him too much right now for some unknown reason. I guess distance really does make the heart grow fonder.
What should I do? I want to do well in school...AND have Nick. Maybe it's not meant to be.
AstraAngel! I see you have returned! I was starting to get worried about you
I hope you'll get a chance to read my latest posts....I haven't been able to stop thinking about Nick! October is closer then I thought...the anxiety is building!
Take care Love, DaniBo
Hey thanks for hanging in there, I went through a change of location.
I wanted to go ahead and reply to your first question, and let you know I am looking over the rest... I thought the first two cards were so telling I had to pop it to you right away for you to contemplate.
For the A question, are you studying properly, I had these two cards come up:
The Devil and the Ten of Cups. The Devil represents your school and the ten of cups is your love life. So what I saw right away is how large your emotional life looms next to your school. You are so in love with love, a total romantic, and long for that heart-shaped paradise. And so of course it is hard for you to think about school! I can imagine that is very difficult for someone like you, as I can really sense how deeply you are really in love, with the highest ideal of love. And that is such a beautiful part of you, and it is something worth reverencing, and not letting school become too like everything in your world. So this will shape some discussion moving forward.
Over the last few days I have occasionally thought of you, and the first thing that popped into my mind was to tell you to not give up on Nick. Like, I cannot let DaniBo loose the flame of that brilliant light. Certainly, you were holding that candle for Nick, however it is really your heart that is out there, you are in love with Heaven, or at least a very heavenly love that you believe in with all of your heart. And I wanted you to know what a precious gift that is and to never ever give up on any one you care about. That is so sweet, and is so important to value. I see beautiful things developing for you there, at least with this ideal of love you carry in you.
I haven't even looked at the B question yet, this was such a revelation to me I had to stop what I was doing and write to you. It is very important for us to acknowledge how important and vital that emotional part of you is, your longing for love, and then we can look closer at school. The love you chase is very strong, and is what first must be opened out, and embraced. Do you see that? This ten of Hearts is a powerful energy, right next to your schooling. I see a wonderful opportunity here to better understand what this love means to you... then I believe the school piece will work itself out, however that needs to go. I have changed my mind about you though... I am beginning to see how important this love in you is, and that is where significant focus should be. I know that sounds contrary to what most might say, most would say put love on the back burner and focus totally on school... that may not be your path.
I will reply on the rest in a bit...
It's totally fine! I was worried something had happened! But I hope your move went well, and that you are enjoying your new location!
Thank you for giving me something to think about. I've definitely been wondering about these two cards. yesterday I had an emotional breakdown about school, because I'm so stressed out (I have four major exams next week! EKKKK!) and I'm so nervous about Nick that I guess it got to be too much, but I guess it was good i released all that pent-up emotion.
I am anxious to see what else you have to say about school and about Nick! I hope it's all good news. I will wait patiently for your next response.
I'm so sorry I keep posting silly comments, but I feel like I need to post this one! haha
Well, tomorrow is my birthday. And unfortunately, I'll be spending it studying for my anatomy exam
I'm rather bummed out about how my birthday is going to go, and I'm also bummed out because I can't stop thinking about how different my birthday would probably be if Nick were here.
I know I can't do anything about that, but still. It sucks, you know? My twin sister is spending our birthday with her amazing boyfriend, and I can't help but wonder what my day would be like if Nick were back in Los Angeles.
It's made me start thinking even more about him, and I know tomorrow I'm going to be so disheartened that I'll be spending my birthday with my anatomy textbook.
Anyways, the point of this whole rant was that the next time you get on this forum, I hope with all my heart that you can offer me some guidance with Nick. I know, i ask so many dumb questions, but, I feel as if my birthday is going to be spent thinking of HIM and I don't want to do that if he's not worth my time!
So, I hope that you can offer me some guidance not only on school (Because I'm still worried it's going to take me 5 yrs to finish!) and on Nick, because I miss him so much, and I still don't know what's going on with this, or if he's really worth getting so love sick over. He's coming home VERY soon, and if he weren't to call me, I think I would hit rock bottom.....
Thanks AstraAngel! Have a wonderful and fun-filled weekend!