The heart of a Virgo man
@Totitoti thank you dear! Based on the charts I've checked before, we are pretty compatible! My problem as of late is that he confuses me because i just can't tell if he's sticking around because he doesn't want to hurt my feelings, or if he actually does feel something too! Basically, we started off as flirty but friendly and we started hanging out almost every week at least twice with our friends together, and writing everyday when we werent (not every second of the day because we both have busy lives, but when we see, we answer!) but then the lockdown happened here again so we got a bit separated and the lats time we got together was to go to a party where I got a bit too drunk and became a bit too touchy according to my friends. I was so embarrassed by what I heard happened that I stopped writing to him for a week but then we started writing again as normal and things seem to be normal again, I've even flirted a bit and he didn't react badly, so I guess I'm wondering if you think he would keep talking to me if he wasn't interested or is it a male virgo thing to feel too bad to turn a girl down? Thanks again for allowing me to join the Convo! Love and light xx
@Jodomi I'm sorry I'm late to reply as I have two babies who need my attention. Virgo man, or any other man for that matter, wouldn't talk to you if he wasn't interested. Is his interest romantic or solely for friendship, that's yours to discover. You're 15 years younger than me so I think approaches to men are different too. What I can tell you is be who you are. Don't be embarrassed of anything you've done. You did it and that's it. Own your actions and admit when you're wrong or right. Regardless of signs, relationships are difficult. I'm a Scorpio who's been married to Taurus and it was a horrible marriage. I'm now married to a Virgo and everything is great. Depends on the mindset. If you two strive to same things in life, that's a great foundation for relationship. If one of you is just ready to play, pain will be inevitable. That's all I can say.
@Totitoti thank you this seems to be true! We actually saw each other Sunday and we had a lot of fun and in fact now we write to each other more confortably than before even I feel! I guess something good is happening (or so I hope!)
@Jodomi That's great. I hope it all turns out well for you two. Just never forget to directly address all the issues you have with him. Virgos don't like confrontation but don't tolerate his Bs.
@Mommy-Crab i hope baby rick had a great first birthday. I hope he is going to make all his wishes and dreams come true
Hello All - I've been stalking this thread for a couple of months, really trying to read through all 400+ pages. I got to page 100 and then gave up, honestly. LOL! I wanted to share my story and get some feedback. Sorry for the long post...
I met this Virgo man (Libra Moon, Libra Venus) via a University online program back in October - we were in the same group for one of our classes. I'm a Scorpio (Libra Moon, Virgo Venus) and gave him my number toward the end of the class, and we started texting almost daily (his initiation). I knew, reading from many websites, that Virgos move very slow. So I wanted to try and build a friendship with him. I have also been VERY apprehensive about telling him how I truly felt, that I wanted to be more than friends. I'm about 6 years older than him also (him 31, me 37).
Most days we communicate, it's multiple messages from him in a row usually in the evening after the work day has finished (he tells me about everything going on in his day, and his likes/dislikes) and sends me pictures from his camping trip and his Thanksgiving meal he cooked. I usually mirror his text style with replying. I VERY RARELY reply immediately, and usually take up to a day to reply so that I don't look desperate. There have been 2 separate times when he went for an entire week without any communication. I would give him his space, and text him about a week after and he would immediately reply letting me know that work has been overwhelming. He works in healthcare, so I understand that particular industry is a little crazy right now. However, during our text conversations I've noticed 3 patterns...
- He RARELY asks me any questions, it's usually me asking something about him/life/politics/etc.
- He RARELY initiates conversation, mostly just replying to me.
- Although I compliment him, and encourage him when he's talking to me about his future, I never receive the same kind of communication back from him.
Unfortunately, we do not live anywhere close to each other, several states away, so physical meetup is difficult. Last week, I had asked him if he were open to have a Zoom catch up and he agreed. So, Saturday evening we had a Zoom call for over 2 hours face-to-face via video. Conversation went great, he was very sweet, funny, and engaged. There was never a time with any uncomfortable silence. I thought it went well, and I thought we had a good vibe. He laughed with me, and listened to all my stories intently. After our call ended, I text him a couple of times telling him about the shows I was watching as a recommendation, and he replied telling me what he was watching also.
Monday was no communication from him, but that evening I mustered up the courage (with LOTSSSSS of anxiety in tow) to tell him that I felt I had a wonderful time chatting with him on Saturday night. I said I thought he was cute, kind, and funny and that we vibe well together. I also said "I would love to continue getting to know you better, if you're up for it." I thought that was pretty clear in me telling him that I like him, I think he's cute, and that I want to continue getting to know him as more than friends. Tuesday evening rolls around and he replies with "apologies for the delay. I'm flattered and thank you! I'm totally down for a good friendship". I felt extremely shattered after reading that message. I feel like I put my heart on the line, and he basically rejected me. At this point, I just want to hide and never talk to him ever again. I'm SO embarrassed and I feel that communicating with him more will just make me look like a weak little puppy dog, awaiting for attention from someone who only wants to be friends.
Am I blowing this out of proportion, or am I right to feel this way? I don't connect with people often AT ALL. I felt something strong with him immediately, even before we started text messaging, and there was something in me that couldn't shake it. I would have never pursued him, if my heart didn't feel so strongly about it. I guess I'm looking for a little guidance. I was really hoping he would have at least complimented me back, telling me he had a good time chatting with me on Saturday, but I got nothing....I feel very dejected...
@ScorpVirgo Welcome and I'm sorry to be this late to reply to you.
As a fellow Scorpio, I can relate to everything you've just written, the connection, the intensity of feelings... Everything. I've always thought Scorpios and Virgos have the special bond nobody else is able to create.
That being said, you have all the right to feel the way you do. Regardless the sign, compliments should always be reciprocated and I'm sure you "read" the signs well and you acted on it. Nothing wrong with that.
I'm now married to a Virgo who's put me to he'll and back. He is a great husband and father, but he really treated me in a weird way to say the least. He said that was because he has never felt that intensity of feeling with someone else before. He even disappeared, git married, had a child, divorced and came back to me because "I was the one". I'm not a type of a desperate woman who would believe anything I'm told, but I believed his words because I felt the same way about him.
I've noticed Virgos don't like when they get things easily and the nicer you treat them, the more eager they are to disappear. Remove yourself from his radar and let him come to you. When he comes back act as if nothing happened because he will behave the same way. Don't give off much of emotion. Let him chase.
I hope you will come back with great news. Good luck!
@Jayann We're doing well and hope you are too. Stay safe and have wonderful holidays ahead !
@Totitoti - Thank you for the feedback. I just feel very disappointed in the whole thing. I guess things have been put into perspective for me. I put my time and energy into someone, whom I thought felt the same as me. Now that I look back on it, I may have been disillusioned by our conversations and may have read too far into it?
I don't know if I want to be treated like I don't matter until I'm worthy of his love and attention. I like to be told that I at least am worth something, like my company is enjoyed or that he likes me in his life. If that's not something that can be provided by him, do I really want to stay and be treated that way for however long it lasts with him? I need some form of appreciation. If I act like nothing is wrong if/when he comes back, isn't that just perpetuating the situation, and letting him know that's it's perfectly fine to treat me like I'm not important? I just don't know if that behavior should be encouraged and or ignored. Thoughts?
@ScorpVirgo try not to think much about what happened. Things can always be reversed. When I say act as if nothing happened I don't think that you do so to show him it's OK to treat you that way, but to show him you don't care. Give him the taste of his own actions. I Hate mind games but Don't beat yourself for what happened. It's in the past and leave it there. The less attention and the less compliments you give to Virgo, he will appreciate your company more. If he didn't enjoy your company, he wouldn't talk with you for hours. He probably has more ladies on hand or he might be married. Everything is possible.
@Totitoti - Thanks for the insight and suggestions. I dont know if he'll ever reach out again, especially if he knows I like him. If I just leave it alone he may just fade away because his ego (or possibly shyness) may lead him to just not want to talk to me again. That's just my gut feeling. I guess we'll see. For now, I'm still very hurt and quite embarrassed.
Mommy Crab last edited by
Take care both of you. I will be back soon. Right now very busy with few stuffs.
@ScorpVirgo I agree with totitoti, stop talking to him for a while and act unphased when and if he does come back, virgo guys don't like pressure it seems or showing their emotions immediately. The virgo guy im interested in is sometimes very confusing to understand too, but the approach I feel is to not be too absorbed in the guy (or any guy in general), it makes them want you more
@ScorpVirgo you're most welcome. Take it easy on yourself. You haven't done anything you should be embarrassed about. He is going to come back. Virgos always come back. When he does act casual and don't let him deep under your skin (I know it's hard not to). Get busy with your own life and dedicate time to yourself. Everything is going to be OK.
@Jodomi @Totitoti - thank you both for being encouraging. I don't have much hope for him coming back, it's been dead silence from him. He probably doesn't care that he's hurt my feelings since he only wants to be friends anyway. I will keep you guys updated. For now, I will be pushing him out of my mind as much as possible. This overthinking is killing me.
I am very curious as to what happened with your Virgo man. Did you end up waiting?
I dated a Virgo man for 7 years. I’m 40 now and did not have children. He led me on for a long time and I really thought I was the love of his life. I still believe this for some reason and think he married someone who fit into his family better than me. For some reason, I think he is still searching for something more.
I was just wondering about Virgo men and if they end up doing what they say they are going to do. I read so many of your posts and was genuinely interested in how you are doing now. Did you move on to someone else? Are you two still in touch?
Your post was from 10 years ago so you may not have the same email address to receive this notification. I hope you do though.
I used to date a different Virgo guy a long time ago and he got married on a whim due to his mom wanting to arrange him with someone. He tried to contact me last year, after 18 years to try to hit on me. I thought that was pretty cheap of him given he is married with two kids. It made me wonder about how stable Virgo men are long term. I didn’t really love this Virgo though. I just loved the one I dated for 7 years.
@Totitoti it helped me so much go read your story with Jens.
I feel the same way like you do. I don’t think I will ever get over him. I loved him more than myself. He was cruel, never told me he moved on to keep me wondering, sadistic, lacked empathy, and is the reason I did not marry or have kids. I lost myself completely in his manipulation.
Since we broke up he married someone 10 years younger than him. He has never posted her photo online on any of his social media accounts. I wonder how that makes his wife feel. He abruptly moved on from me and I dont think he ever healed. I read something funny one day that said a Virgo man will leave you for the Starbucks barista. I believe it. You cannot ever fully trust these men. When they leave you, it’s cold. They will ghost you in the coldest way and then try to make you feel bad about yourself. They don’t do emotions so they move on to the next best thing.
I do think he regrets leaving though...he knows he was a jerk to me. I was young and innocent and that was perfect for him to manipulate me. I think that’s why he went with another young girl and I’m sure he mistreats her as well with his manipulative comments. I think she committed emotional suicide as you mentioned you said to your ex.
I’m so glad you both moved on from your Virgo exes. I hate that his memories haunt me so I told myself I have to be happy for him but like Jen, I also told myself I have no obligation to be happy for him. I never really moved on because I became ill for 10 years. I worked so hard for our future and I sit in an empty house now and I am out of time to have children. I couldn’t imagine my life without him and it has taken me a decade to try to understand and forget him.
I dated another Virgo man 18 years ago for a few years. He is married and has two kids. He tried to hit on me on social media recently and his wife found out. This is after 18 years after breaking up with him. I think he is so tacky to do that to his wife and kids. I’m sure that damage was irreparable but his wife will probably stay with him. These Virgo men become lurkers and I’m sure they are always going to stalk you to see what you are up to.
I also had another Virgo man that I worked with recently who apparently developed a crush on me. He was married. I never flirted with him or listened to people when they said he had a crush on me. I just ignored all of it because it was inappropriate. I thought about what a coward he was to have an emotional affair on his wife. I never went out to work gatherings because of him. These Virgo men pride themselves in having a job and providing for their families but they also have emotional affairs at work. They are good looking men.
I hope every woman can learn from my story. Never give a man more than a few years of your time. Never invest in the potential of a man. You never know what can happen to you in your 30’s. You may acquire an illness like me and it may take a decade to get over. What you do with your time in your early and late twenties matters. Even 10 years later, I still think of him, so feel free to realize that you may not ever get over this person but you can be in a loving respectful relationship with someone else and start a family (if that’s what you want). Please don’t ever be stupid like me and waste your life on a man who is not worth your time. Your life is special and we are only here on this earth for a very short time.
One great thing you can do is invest in becoming financially independent. Find a solid career and don’t look back even though you may always have an inner sadness about them. Life will make sense one day for all of us.
Thank you for sharing your stories. They helped me heal and move on.
Mommy Crab last edited by
@Leo_111 welcome to the thread and all the other ladies @Jodomi @ScorpVirgo . This is a never ending virgo saga.I will suggest you all to go through the whole thread. I know it's a huge one and will take some time.
@Leo_111 Only @Totitoti is the one who has a happy ending with her virgo man rest of the experiences are not so good. I dated mine for 5 years ,he led me on and left me for the woman that fitted in his family and yes he is unhappy.
I am currently married with a Taurus but living separately due to my post partum depression. Long story short .
Welcome new members.