The heart of a Virgo man



  • forgot that I wanted to get a piece of advice from the ladies here.

    Virgo has not returned yet but he will be back.

    I really don't wish to have any contact with him again, but know that I can't completely avoid it.

    I have been thinking about it how to behave.

    Should I be cold and polite?

    Ignore him?

    Tell him to stay away.

    All of it seems silly, I don't like playing games, but I don't want any drama or hurt anybody.

    Despite of everything I am still mad at him and can not be friends.

    Everything would be so much easier if I didn't ever had to see him again.



  • Icrabyou - I'm glad the thread has been helpful. As far as your question, here's just my personal opinion - as long as you feel that you have to "be" any certain way around this man then he is still occupying too much in you. Your mind should not be wasting energy on this. The short answer is to just be your normal, natural self and don't be concerned about what effect that has on him. Of course that is what attracted him to you in the first place, but this time you are wiser and better prepared not to be taken in by his "charms".

    It sounds like the experience has you appreciating the man you already had. And even if it hasn't improved your appreciation, I hope it at least demonstrates why you need to take care of your marriage one way or the other first, before embarking on a second relationship. It creates more confusion than any of you deserves to deal with. Keep yourself out of the confusion ICrabYou. Just take a firm stand that you want to just be you and don't worry about the rest. You must have a lot to offer a relationship or you wouldn't have had two on your hands. So be confident that you can have peace of mind in all of this. Don't let Virgo take that away from you. Get your head clear so that you can figure out what's really going on with your marriage. Let that be a priority and go from there. Maybe neither of these men are ultimately the right partner for you, but that's something you need to figure out, ideally one man at a time for the sake of your own sanity. These threesome "relationships" are a bad deal for everyone. You and I have both learned the lesson on that one. 😉

    I don't know if Gem will ever read this, but I am so very impressed with her strength. She will be missed here for sure. 😞



  • I completely agree with Jen here - ICY, you don't have to be any particular way with the Virgo. Just be yourself. If that's difficult to define right now, I'd say - be friendly, but emotionally detached and don't get too close to him, as he would definitely attempt to drag you into his web again. Basically, try to avoid him as much as possible. Good luck with staying strong and putting highest good first !



  • awww virgo men are just awful......

    I am in a very sad situation regarding my Virgo.... iposted here a couple of times but now mine has taken a completely dramatic turn.....i I tried to break it off wtih my virgo ex 40yrs divorced single dad a couple of times...only to find myself back in his web of coldness ......

    I was truly in love with him and i believe he was in the beginning he was spouting "i love you's" all the time... and was soooo attentive and loving then the coldness and disappearing acts started abruptly...anyhow 2 years later... we are barely speaking tried to break up with him a couple of times and .... please dont berate me..... im now 4mnts pg with his child after a 1night relapse..... it is very sad because he has completely turned off.... it is sad that this was the same man i was involved with in the beginning and he was so inlove.... i did not trap him ismore like he trapped me. when i told him 4 mnts ago... hebarely responded..wanted me to get an abortion...and now i have just cut him off at least for hte new year beacuse i think he had enough time to respond positively if he wanted to....

    please ladies how to treat with this....

    carib.... awww virgo men are just awful......

    I am in a very sad situation regarding my Virgo.... iposted here a couple of times but now mine has taken a completely dramatic turn.....i I tried to break it off wtih my virgo ex 40yrs divorced single dad a couple of times...only to find myself back in his web of coldness ......

    I was truly in love with him and i believe he was in the beginning he was spouting "i love you's" all the time... and was soooo attentive and loving then the coldness and disappearing acts started abruptly...anyhow 2 years later... we are barely speaking tried to break up with him a couple of times and .... please dont berate me..... im now 4mnts pg with his child after a 1night relapse..... it is very sad because he has completely turned off.... it is sad that this was the same man i was involved with in the beginning and he was so inlove.... i did not trap him ismore like he trapped me. when i told him 4 mnts ago... hebarely responded..wanted me to get an abortion...and now i have just cut him off at least for hte new year beacuse i think he had enough time to respond positively if he wanted to....

    please ladies how to treat with this....

    carib....



  • Caribchic,

    Dear, my heart goes out to you, just know that you will love that child no matter what. He will have a change of heart yet again, but something is broken for you in regards to him. You will not trust him again unless he consistently shows you support. I do not know if it is Virgo men or just men in general. 😞 Thinking of you. Just maintain your space and silence and look for peace in your heart, you will find it if you get passed being uncomfortable with the silence at first.



  • Jenever7, I am so glad you posted about Astra Angel....I have done a few readings with him and he is so fantastic! His readings are scarily accurate, his writing style so warm and reassuring....I ordered a reading off of Fiverr the other day and was just amazed!! I miss him on this forum but am glad to see him branching out.

    On another note, I hope this forum does not go away and get abandoned... many of us no longer have relationships with the Virgos that brought us here, but it is a wonderful way to share and get feedback from truly caring, wonderful people. I may not post a lot, but I do read the forum daily....I think it is important for us to keep sharing about anything that comes up that we need to get support and advice about....you are all a gift in my life and hopefully everyone feels the same! Hugs to you all!!



  • thank you mardepp

    yes it is a very trying time and like all the other ladies here a virgo man brought me here...... I am trying to stay silent and away ...last time i saw him was old year's eve.... so I havent seen him or heard from him since the year started..... may be for the best. But not me and another virgo again!!

    Libraluli can you please tell me how to get a reading from AA. I did get a free one from him here regarding virgo and he was accurate... wish i had listened..... anyway where and how can i get a new reading from him....

    thanks for the support

    carib....



  • Hi carib,

    Astra is now on Fiverr dot com. It is a simple process to sign up (email and password) Then, in the search box, just put astra angel and he should pop up!! He is so gifted, the reading he recently did for me was so accurate, it described the guy I met the night before right down to where he worked....amazing. Plus, he is so warm and sensitive when he writes to you....very refreshing!

    Good luck....let me know if you have problems finding him.

    Hugs 🙂



  • Caribchic, so sorry to hear about your situation ! However, every cloud has a silver lining - having a child from the man you were genuinely in love with would probably make this child feel very special for you, no matter what happens between yourself and his dad. If you are sure (and it looks like you are), that you are ready to become a mother, please start putting your needs first, taking a good care of your and the baby's health and at least temporarily disconnect from the Virgo completely, emotionally that is. You might need him for a practical/financial support in the future, if you chose to keep him in your child's life, so it might be a good idea to be on friendly terms with him now. If I were you, I would not put a pressure on him of any kind (after all, he did suggest an abortion), rather let him decide for himself what role he wants to play in your child's life (if at all). This way there would be less resentment involved, and your child would benifit from it. Please stay strong and practical, and we are here for you if you need to talk about any aspect of it. Hugs !



  • Hi Caribchic - I suppose a baby seems like a mixed blessing under the circumstances, but I applaud the decision you have made for yourself and your baby. You don't say whether this is your first child, but trust me, that little person is going to bring you much joy. The next few months might be emotionally trying, but just know that is all going to wash away when you bring that new life into our world. I agree with VoplySoply's thoughts about keeping things civilized with the father. You'll appreciate some financial support if he's willing to give it. Hard to imagine that he will be able to turn his back on his own flesh and blood, but at the same time, people do it - women as well as men. And I tend to agree, that if he is such a person, you and your child's lives will be far more balanced without him causing problems for you.

    Libralui - I agree with you. I haven't been checking the thread everyday but I do still check in because I care very much for the people who are here. Believe it or not, I am still in communication with Virgo and just kind of letting things ride. I don't see him. I've still only seen him one time since he came back into my life in September - and that was my initiative, not his. You know in the couple of weeks before he returned into my life I really felt like I was at a personal turning point. I was making new plans for myself. He disrupted that by putting me in such an emotional tizz, but I've been resolving that within myself and wandering back to my own path here. Part of me is very intentionally stepping away from the thread. I don't want to speculate or make judgements or keep rehashing the past. I've been very clear and honest with Virgo - even if at times he doesn't like my emotional presentation. 😉 We both agree that we don't want to repeat the past, but I'm not sure what that means to him. I would see the easy solution to that as taking the good things we have between us, and creating something better than we had before. That would certainly be a new take on things, lol. But that takes two and it takes trust and both of us believing that we have something worthy of taking a chance on. A decision that he obviously hasn't made for himself.

    I'll tell you what's interesting for me regarding the thread is that in responding to ICrabYou recently, it made me think about some things for myself as well. Things that I'm now actively working on to move to a different outlook. I have been meaning to share that with ICrabYou, but since I haven't been posting I haven't mentioned it. That was a nice twist to realize that in trying to help someone else I saw something new for myself too. We are all just endless works in progress...

    Thank you to those of you supporting AstraAngel in his new endeavors. I have chatted with him a bit outside of the thread and I was surprised by some of his personal struggles. He is always so optimistic and giving to others. I have also found him to be crazy accurate with his readings and I adore his creative presentation and sense of humor. I wouldn't have suspected that he had a care in the world. But of course we all have our crosses that we bear. Knowing that some folks here are willing to give a little back to a man who has so generously offered his services to us for free on the forum is really awesome. And for the little bit that he charges, he is a heck of a deal. (And no, I am not receiving anything for saying these things. You all know what a marshmallow I am, I just wish for Astra to gain some fresh starts in his life. We all know what it feels like to have our energies blocked and feel stuck.)



  • Just giving the post a bump here. 🙂






  • ". . . endless works in progress." Love it!

    Just stopping by to check and read up on everyone, been very busy with my new grandson!

    Jen, thanks for supporting AA; I'll check the site out!

    Always keeping all of you in my prayers. CaribChic please listen to VS's great advice and put you and your beautiful baby first!

    Hugs xoxo



  • Thank You ladies for the love and support for my baby bump

    i cant tell you how much turmoil I have been in the last 4 months yes I am now 4 mnths and baby's fine according to doc. and due in June. so virgos baby will be here with or without him.. I have scoured this thread and other readings on virgo men and how to understand them and I just couldn’t figure him out . His love seemed genuine and real in the beginning and I think I was foolishly holding on to that person from the start until his disappearing acts became the norm and i was tryin to justify bad behaviour for love. anyhow for his birthday in September we had a brief encounter was his 40th bday.... and oopsy baby is here. I have berated myself for being so foolish and cried and then tried to see it as positive and some days it is soooo hard. I am already a single mom of a 10 yr old and to be preggo 10 yrs later and in your 40s is just haaaaard..... 😞

    so ure right Jen 7 it is a mixed blessing and I just hope the baby doesn’t feel how depressed I am...it didn’t ask to be here.

    I asked Virgo if he wanted to go to me to the u/s to see if it is a b/g he bluntly refused and said " I don’t have anything to with that (baby)"

    so after that statement just before xmas I decided to send him a few emotional hormonal texts about u don’t care about me. and I just sorta disappeared since. He ignored the text and asked me if i was coming to hangout with him for new years.... i ignored him.

    How i landed myself in this situation? sigh I don’t know.... so I really appreciate the support from everyone because imagine now the heart of a Virgo man and all our woes with them now has a baby as a byproduct. all for trying to understand them.

    Hugs

    caribchic 😞

    ps i really should’ve listened to Astraangel 😞

    and yes I am giving myself some space from him.



  • Well Caribchic, I don't know about the others here, but I'd love for you to keep us posted on your "baby bump". It's actually nice that you already have a child in some ways. You know what to expect since you've been through the experience. At least you don't have the worries of the unknown on top of the emotions of dealing with Virgo being absent. Hopefully your child is excited about having a sibling. Seems like "only" children typically long for a sibling. So even with the age spread, you'll now have someone that will be in your 10-year-olds life forever. Makes me sad that you are having to deal with depressed feelings during what should be a joyful time. These darn men. But you really have it right, you justifying his bad behavior in the interest of love is not showing love to yourself. I admit, this is on my list of things to set right within myself, so I do understand what you are saying. I had posted something on my facebook recently that I got from a friend that says, "sometimes the hardest thing in life is knowing when to walk away, and when to try harder". It's so true sometimes isn't it.

    AriesBB - Sounds like you're having fun there! Enjoy! And thank you for your prayers for everyone. 🙂



  • Thanks for your kind words Jen7 and I will keep you posted if ure interested... and thanks for the support 🙂

    Enjoy your weekend

    carib

    yes men virgo or not shouldn be allowed to abandon women when pregnant...



  • Caribchic, I guess this situation has forced the Virgo guy to show his true colors. Abandonning women when pregnant is an act of cowardice, which unfortunately is not against the law, so some men do it, Virgo or not. The same situation has recently happenned to a collegue of mine, except she and her boy-friend (Pisces) were living together. He left after she's got pregnant because he "couldn't cope". Now she has a lovely baby daughter. She is a strong woman and is doing ok, although it came as a big shock to her, when he left. She now says that she wouldn't have him back, even if he asked, because she's lost the respect for him.



  • awwwww that's terrible. yes there should be more laws for preventing men from abandoning their partners and children.... the ultimate cruelty . Yes well i am used to coward men they seem to abound in the Caribbean ...where I am from. Single mothers and machismo is a big part of the cuture here....still havent heard from him. Imagine....



  • Hm, I don't know caribchic, if the men who have no conscious about alienating their children were forced to be in their lives would it help the children or just open the door to encourage them to become like their fathers? He's demonstrating right now that he wouldn't be a good role model. At least you can try to instill something different in your children.

    I don't underestimate the challenge of living in a culture where machismo rules - particularly if you have sons, but maybe that's just more the reason not to have a man who conducts his life based on what the rest of society is allowing. A man who can't think on his own or take responsibility for what he created. Unless he were to have some kind of epiphany here and change completely, he will surely pass on the same weakness to his child. In some ways that's inevitable anyway, because his absence in the life of his child will be just as much a reflection of his weakness. Let's hope that is an inspiration to your child to NOT be that way, rather someday thinking, "well this is what my dad did, so it's okay if I do it too". Going to be very hard to prevent behavior that is becoming accepted by society as "normal" though.

    Hope you are feeling well. You're right about the stage where that bitty bump turns into a big lump pretty fast. 🙂



  • Thank You Jen 7 for your kind words.... 🙂

    Yes and the bitty bump just looks like I had too much for lunch right now I am disguising it at work so far no one noticed... 🙂

    Well I saw Virgo yesterday... He is completely avoiding the bump issue... and pretending that we are platonic and not having a baby on the way. Maybe he is really in denial. Or doesnt want to address it. Anyhow Jen you are right he may not be such a great role model he is bad boy type and maybe battling with him for years to come is not the kind of stress I'm looking fwd. to.

    yes he is a virgo and something about him I find irresistible.... but oh my gosh!!! I just hope he has that epiphany....which I doubt.

    Hugs

    Carib.

    PS i keep dreaming virgo's baby is a boy. He always wanted a son.


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