The heart of a Virgo man



  • HELLO LADIES, HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING ?????????

    IS THERE ANY SAG ON IN HERE????? I KNOW ITS NOT A SAG THREAD , IF ANY ONE OF YOU CAN GIVE ME SOME INFO BOUT SAG GALS?????

    ARE SAGG GALS ADVENTEROUS?????

    DO THEY LIKE SURPRISES?????

    LMAO I THINK I'LL HAVE TO FIND A GOOD SAG THREAD TO KNOW MY NEW SAG FRIEND BETTER ;-).....0_0....^_^

    VOPLY SOLPY AFTER 10 LONG YEARS OF UNWANTED EMOTIONAL AGONY ATLAST GOD HAS GIVEN YOU A HOPE//CHANCE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE ONCE AGAIN TO THE FULLEST PLEASE DO NOT WASTE IT. DO YOUR SELF A FAVOUR CUT ALL THE CONTACT WITH YOUR VIRGO FRIEND (((EXCEPT THE PROFESSIONAL))) AND GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE AND FROM THIS TOXIC RELATIONSHIP. DELETE HIM FROM YOUR FB PROFILE//YOUR LIFE IF POSSIBLE. GIVE YOUR TAURUS A FAIR CHANCE. I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST LADY ;). BE HAPPY BCOZ YOU DESERVE IT .

    SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR DOGGY. I LOVE ANIMALS, MY FAVOURITE DOGGY DIED FEW YEARS BACK. SO I CAN UNDERSTAND.



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  • Hello Guyfriend,

    I am a Sag gal myself so hopefully I can help you. I read your questions and I will elaborate later but ask me more and what you really want to know and I will be happy to help in anything I can... Hope that you are doing great!



  • G4F, first of all, congratulations on your masters degree ! That's a wonderful news, and it's so great that nothing has distracted you from this goal ! As for the Cappy, well, it's good that he is revealing his nagging side sooner than later. Oh my Goodness, once in my very young years I was dating a very insecure Taurus (not like my current Taurus), and it was virtually impossible to convince him that I wasn't trying to get away from him, until one day it all became too much for me and I moved to another country, lol ( continuing the studies opportunity also played a part, of course, but so did his nagging). So, unfortunately, in my experience, dealing with too insecure men doesn't work. Maybe you could have one last, very franc talk with him, and gently explain him that having to convince him is draining your emotional energy.

    Mardepp, how is your new work going ? Have you already started it ?

    Guyfriend, you are mainly right about the main direction of my life. The last 10 years were indeed confusing ones, and they would have been agonising if the "survival" instinct didn't kick in. To be fair, I wasn't exactly a "martir" in this situation either. Even though I'm not proud of it, I in fact rather congratulate myself on the fact that shortly after I realised that the Virgo has withdrawn his affection for good (it took me about a year to figure it out), I had enough sense to start seing this current Taurus from time to time, when he was visiting Europe, about twice a year. It started just as friendship, then became friendship with benifits, then gradually this relationship has moved to the whole other level. Possibly this is what is going to happen with your Sag girl, by the way, if you take it slowly, get to know her better. Then something awsome might come out of it. Don't worry, I am not going to waste my chances with the Taurus, and I'm glad that we've taken it very slowly over the years, so that there is no doubt in my mind now that it's him I want. For that reason, actually, I don't feel bitter towards Virgo (just irritated and wary sometimes), because I don't feel exactly like the only "wronged" part. So, I'm inclined to keep things friendly, but emotionally detached.



  • G4E, congratulations on your Masters!

    VS, wonderful Taurus news!

    GF, glad you're making plans with the Sag girl!

    Ladies, have a great day!



  • Thanks ladies for the congrats! I'm so happy! Today was a day for great news as I have an interview for a job I wanted...wish me luck!

    VS I cannot deal with a man who has insecurities either. I'm going to tell Cappie it's a done deal. I think nagging is a part of who he is and I dont have the energy to work with that. It's too exhausting trying to talk with him about it. Also there are too many differences with us and I knew it. I just really wanted it to work out, however you cannot force anything to work that's not supposed to work. He's too bossy, pushy, and pouts too much for my taste. He is smothering me and I don't feel comfortable with him anymore. So much for that. sigh

    Virgo is; well being a Virgo. He doesn't want to talk about new guy and I'm not going to tell him I'm not seeing new guy anymore. Let him think I'm otherwise occupied. Then he won't be thinking he has a chance. We are talking again but I don't want him to get any ideas about us; I don't want to put myself through that again. It would be nice to get this new job to put distance between us. Then maybe I can truly move on. Seeing him at work is just not a good idea.



  • Gem - What great news, congratulations!! (Applauding you here).

    Guyfriend - so nice to have you back. I missed your wit and your charm 🙂 Mardepp always has great insights so I expect she can tell you a lot about Sags. All the Sag women I know are fun, interesting and energetic. Actually all the Sag men I know are like that too. I dated one for a while and he was all about surprises. Liked to take me out but not tell me where we were going just so that I could be surprised when we got there. Lol. He's a great guy. Still a trusted life-long friend. That's great that you're still seeing Sag lady. Must be going well.

    Okay, so I had such a laugh today I must share. My Virgo coworker, that I mentioned in my last post, had his review this morning. I didn't ask about it because I figured it wasn't my business. So we're packing up to go and he volunteered, "well, my review went fairly well this morning, there was just one issue...boss says I need to show more leadership within the team". I said, "really? And what do you think about that?" He replied, "I didn't realize that being a leader was in my job description". He seemed very put out by this new responsibility. I hope he isn't going to turn whiny on us now.



  • Hi to all of you! I am pretty exhausted working. I am not getting more than 3 and a half or 4 hours of sleep a day lately. I have to get a lot done but I am hoping that once I get into the rhythm of things everything will get more on autopilot...I love my new job, I feel really blessed. I am teaching which I love but it a very special school. We do a lot of trans disciplinary learning and teaching, some traveling even internationally, volunteering and collaborations. I really feel this is the right place for me. I feel really blessed. We had an international speaker yesterday who has a disability and he posed the following question: "What is the one excuse we make to ourselves everyday, which if we stopped making would unlock everything in our lives for the better?" Wow! I have been thinking about that for a couple of days and simply have been noticing how many excuses I make a day, or others make every day...He also said "my disability is visible, but most people have disabilities that are invisible".

    Glad to hear you are all well and congrats to Gemini4ever on your Master's degree! That is great! I say no worries about Cappy. You either feel it or you don't and I said a while back that things between you and Virgo are not over, they really aren't. I am a little psychic sometimes (actually a lot, but I do not talk about it much) and trust me, things are not over between you. Try to not have any negative vibes towards him (Virgo that is), aside from the sign (hee hee) give him a bit of credit if he wants to get closer and let him do the work without analyzing what he does...If you can do that, it will bring good things for you both. Try not to define the relationship when he gets closer.

    To VS, I hope with the passing days you are feeling better about your dog. I know that can be pretty deep. As for your Virgo friend, wow! Such level of detachment!! VS, you need to fly, fly and be happy and say bye or put in a different place what is holding you back. You deserve that, you truly deserve that.

    I am going through some mixed feelings with Virgo over here. I am upset with him and I am just observing my reactions. He has taken all the right steps towards wanting to make things better between us, the thing is I never know if it will sustain itself over time. For the first time in my interaction with him I am really thinking about what I want. I withdraw when someone hurts me on some level or seems careless and he definitely noticed and took steps to repair it. But I am still upset and I told him I am not going to talk about it over the phone. He said "you are not going to scare me away if you get angry with me" But I can't even voice what I feel yet. All I know is that I need some silence within to figure things out for myself...

    To Guy Friend, us Sag girls in some sites I have seen, because we are friendly some people make the mistake of thinking one of two things: that we are "easy" which is not true or that we are superficial or can stay on the surface of things for the sake of fun. What I can say for myself and the few Sag sisters I know (some young, the oldest I know lived to be 103) is that we LOVE LIFE to the fullest. So we do give deeply, are generous with our time and gifts and we also suffer deeply too when adversity hits us. But we know there are lessons to be learned and that ultimately we can use what works for us to make us happy again and so push forward.

    The Sags I know, myself including, have a thirst for truth. It does not matter if that truth will reveal the worst but you got to the bottom of it even if it was to your detriment. We like routine but it is not in our nature not to break it. I personally need routine but it also bores me deeply, I adapt really well to different situations. We can have a dosage of self delusion sometimes.

    When in a relationship we are really loyal and perhaps too transparent. If you have a partner that does not value that and confuses your kindness for weakness we may have trouble accepting that and have a hard time letting go but would eventually leave the relationship.

    This is me, if someone does me wrong once I will give a second chance and it will be genuine, but if the other person does wrong me again I will not give it a second thought. Once I get to that place the one who wronged you does not exist anymore, it really truly does not exist anymore (that self delusion thing).

    We are fun and lighthearted. It is not all heavy!!

    K, guys and gals, hope you are all well and I can finish a project and get some sleep. I can't wait for the weekend so that I can get caught up on my rest!!



  • G4E, good luck with your new job interview ! Hope it goes well ! Yes, working in the same place with the Virgo can be tricky...

    Mardepp, hope your working routine gets lighter once things get more familiar. You need proper sleep, otherwise you'll exhaust yourself and won't be able to function soon, so maybe it would be a good idea to prioritize your tasks - concentrate on the most important ones and improvise your way through the others. I've been reading a book on business, which was advising just that. Productivity versus activity, in other words. This really should be suggested to my direction, by the way. With all the new EU rules the direction was eager to show to the superior organizations that we are killing ourselves with work here, and as a result we had to write tons of completely useless papers last year, which was taking time from the actual teaching and guess what ? It turned out that our direction in their workaholic panic hasn't bothered to find out which of those papers were really important, so our payment for August is being delayed until God knows when because of that. I suppose until they figure out what's really needed. Sorry for venting.

    About Virgos - the trouble is that they change their minds every second day. My Virgo friend's statements alternate between us being "free agents" and "in exclusive relationship", of which in fact neither is true. We are neither in a relationship (as his fb status suggests), nor completely free agents, due to the emotional pressure not to upset each other, which I'm trying to change. Mardepp, with Virgos you are just never going to stand on the firm ground for a long time, that's the problem. There might be episodes of heading in a right direction, but it never lasts.

    Jen, Virgo in a leadership position - I'm curious about the outcome...:-)



  • VS - Virgo coworker has been asked to "demonstrate" more leadership, he has not been put in charge of anything or anyone but himself. So no surprise that I cringed today in a meeting when he commented that he was now "telling his coworkers in his previous department what to do". That is completely untrue. He has the ability to delegate, but only with our manager's go-ahead. But apparently he has it in his head that "demonstrating leadership" now authorizes him to dump on his former coworkers. As I say, I cringed. On the other hand, after working with another Virgo in my previous department as well, I've seen how this sort of vanity holds up only until they're called into accountability. That's when they claim to have zero authority, turn into Teflon, and find all kinds of excuses and other places to point the finger. That other coworker, btw, just got demoted with her review. She is now in a "support" position.

    I suppose now that we've "written the book" here on Virgo men in relationships, we can create a chapter on "Virgo man in the workplace", lol. I will let you know how things go.

    Sorry to hear about YOUR complications at work. Never a good idea to mess with employees paychecks. Moral tanks instantly. Most of us don't go to work because we can't think of other things to do with ourselves. I will hope that they resolve it quickly, but with all those papers to sort through...well, let's hope the people directing things aren't getting their money until it's resolved either. That will give them some incentive.

    Mardepp - Your work sounds very interesting and it must really have you energized to be getting along with so little sleep. I went through a phase like that during/after my divorce. Even in the midst of it I said, "I'm going to look back on this period of time and even I'm not going to know how I did it." Sooner or later you're body will get more tired than your brain and it will make you get your rest. But I sustained like that for about a year. Looked crazy to everyone else, but I really did feel fine. I couldn't explain it - just rolled with it for as long as it lasted. It was a very productive phase of life for me 🙂






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  • Mardepp, it's better to figure things out in your head first as you are doing. I know what you mean about him making things better and yet you wonder if it will sustain itself over time. Virgos are mutable they say one thing one day (or even in the same day) and then the next day it's like they never said what they said. My Virgo always says he never knew what to expect from me from day to day; meaning he didn't know how to interact with me. I told him that yes, he may be consistent in how he behaves from day to day but how do you go from declaring that you love someone to the next day acting as if nothing ever occurred. No mention of it or anything. I hope things work out for you as you wish, I really do!

    As far as you thinking it's not over between Virgo and I, well someone else said the same thing and she's a Sag as well! Do you all believe you're psychic? LOL! Well it wasn't over between us as we've reestablished the friendship; so maybe that's what you feel/see. I have to admit there is an attraction between us; probably always will be so I'm treading very lightly there. If I get this new job it will be very good for me as I won't be exposed to him at all. We wouldn't see each other unless one of us makes an effort to do that. He's very influential in our area and it's better to be friends with him...lol! He knows alot of people and they think highly of him.

    Anyway I ended things with Cappie and I'm good on my own for awhile. Seems everytime I say that I meet someone, but this last one has exhausted me!

    VS,

    Once again I'm glad you're making a move to change things about your status with your Virgo. It all sounds very confusing to me him putting "In a relationship" on his FB page. But you are sort of huh? Not in the conventional way but a relationship of sorts. You're a strong woman, once again I have to say I don't know how you do it.

    Thanks again everyone for the congrats and the well wishes for my interview tomorrow--I'll keep you posted!



  • CONGRATSS!! LADIES ON YOUR NEW ACHIEVEMENTS.

    ARIESBB, JENVER ,VOLPYSOLPY I AM HAVING GOOD TIME WITH MY SAG FRIEND. I AM TAKING IT SLOW AND DONT WANT TO RUSH THINGS RIGHT NOW. SHE IS A VERY NICE PERSON,**** I DONT WANT TO HURT HER.

    MARDEP YOU SOUND SIMILAR TO MY NEW SAG FRIEND LOL. SHE IS EASY GOING and VERY OPEN MINDED AT THE SAME TIME INTELLIGENT AND STRONG GAL. IN MY VERY FIRST IMPRESSION I THOUGHT HER TO BE VERY SHALLOW WHEN FIRST MET HER BUT LATER I REALISED THAT IT WAS NOT THE TRUTH. SHE IS A DEEP PERSON AND NOT TO MENTION BRUTALY HONEST. I HAVE SEEN HOW ASTROLOGY SITES STEREOTYPE SAGS TO BE PROMISCUOUS AND SAY HAVE NO DEPTH INSIDE THEM WHICH IS UNTRUE. ON THE SAME ASTROLOGY SITES THEY SEREOTYPE VIRGO MEN TO BE ""THE MOST LOYAL""? , ""STABLE""?, ""RATIONAL""? AND PRACTICAL (((WHICH IS MY ***))).THE HARD FACT IS VIRGO MEN ARE THE MOST FLIGHTY COLD and DUAL PEOPLE I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE ******* LIFE AND YEAH DELUSIONAL PSYCHOS. FOR LIBRANS THE STEREOTYPE INCLUDES CHARMING , FLIRTY, INDECISIVE, NOT SO LOYAL BLAH BLAH BLAH. MIND YOU WE LIBRANS ARE NOT ALWAYS CHARMING BUT WE ARE VERY LOYAL WHEN IN LOVE // COMMITTED. WE LOVE TO LOVE AND THATS 100% GENUINE.THANXX FOR THE DETAILS LADY.. 🙂

    P.S- MY EX Y Z GEM IS DATING A NEW GUY PROLY AN ARIES(((her new agony aunt))) BUT THE SADDEST PART IS HER STRINGS ARE STILL ATTACHED WITH HER EX ************ VIRGO. I TRULY HOPE SHE ESCAPES FROM HER VIRGO HORROR MOVIE SOON. ITS ******* SCARY. //////////////////



  • Ladies, you know who else was a Virgo ? Freddy Mercury, as I've just found out ("Queen"). Like M. Jackson, another brilliant artist with thoroughly messed up personal life. Also an interesting fact is that he hasn't always been g a y. Apparently, love of his life was a woman, called Mary Austin, who he lived with for several years, before having discovered his homosexuality. They remained close friends and somewhat of a brother and sister for the rest of his life. Fortunately for her, he was brave enough to give her an honest answer, when she started suspecting it, so that she could move on with her life (just thinking about that collegue of mine...)

    GF, just congratulate yourself on the fact that it's not you the "agony aunt" for the Gem lady anymore. Hope she resilves her situation before she breaks few unsuspecting hearts in her turn...No, Sag ladies (or men) are not shallow at all. Actually I have a great admiration for every single Sag I've met in my life, as human beings.

    G4E, pity fb doesn't have "in a disfunctional relationship" option, lol. But seriously, the appearence of the "in relationship" status on my Virgo friend's page has coincided with him making his dad a fb friend. So I guess it's a cover up of a kind. But I see your point - I guess you can say that we are in a relationship of a kind, except that it's not an intimate one. Brother and sister of a sort, maybe ?

    Jen, yes, Virgos as bosses can be very confusing. I have never had one, but can easily imagine all the mixed messages they would be sending, plus the panicky, rushing, anxious energy around...God forbid.

    Well, I certainly hope that my working situation (or rather being paid for the work done) gets resolved pretty soon, otherwise I'd have to consider other options.



  • VS, sorry to hear about your payment situation! Hope this gets resolved very soon!



  • Thanks ABB, it seems that the problem is on a national level. Other schools haven't been paid for August either...We'll see. Maybe it's time to try something new...



  • Hey, how is everyone? Sorry I haven't been around much. I've been in a space of thinking and there are things happening in my life that need my full attention. One thing that happened this week that I will now share with you though, was that I did get an apology. Virgo called out of the blue and we had a nice, calm conversation. I wasn't mad or even surprised that he called really. I think that based on our past I knew this possibility always was out there. He is not yet divorced, but it's all in the works now. He invested himself in trying to make things work this past year, but as he put it, things remained more unhappy than happy. Now it sounds like things are turning into a battle, and he will have to push through that in the months to come.

    It sounds like he's been in a reflective mood, evaluating where he's been and how he got to this place. Mending bridges he had burned along the way. He said he knew that he had caused me hurt and that this was his fault, not mine. It would have been easy to be smug and agree, but that isn't the truth. The truth is that while I did eventually walk away, it's something I should have done sooner. Not just for him, but for myself as well. I said, "we both made mistakes". I admitted that I had missed him in my life, never stopped thinking about him (how could I folks given the existence of this thread? Many are the days I fully knew that this thread was actually an obstacle to my healing process, as much as a help, but I enjoy the people here and I have made some true friends here - so there was the tradeoff) and I told him that I cared about him. There's nothing in me that wants to hate him or hurt him at this point. We've communicated a bit via text this past week since the phone call. I'd like to think we can be friends. That's how I've always "ended" relationships.

    So I don't know what comes next but the timing is interesting. I've been doing a lot of reevaluating myself the past weeks. I've had many second thoughts about Ariesman and where things are going there - or not going. It has been eight months and I found lately that I am feeling opressed by the relationship. Which is pretty lame considering how little time we spend together and considering that he really is a good guy for the most part. So clearly something is missing here and it's starting to seem unfair to keep things going. At the same time I've realized that I have continued to harbor some resentment over an issue that I had discussed with Ariesman twice in the past and he never resolved - his continued presence on the dating site. I had only checked twice in the time I've known him to see if he were still there. The second time was just to see if he had kept his word after the first time I discovered him there. He had not, but I resolved to let actions speak louder than words and see what happened. I don't want a relationship with someone that I have to "police". But given my general questioning lately and the appearance of Virgo raking up many thoughts, I decided last night to check again. To me this is a measure of his commitment to our relationship I guess. He is still there and "active within two weeks". Realize, he has to pay to stay on this site. Even if it's a case where he signed up for a long term, he didn't remove his profile in eight months of seeing me. Mind you he said he was nearly at the end of his subscription period months ago. So, the reality is that he either renewed or he lied six months ago about his real status.

    So, in light of just a whole bunch of life events here and emotional quandaries all coming together at the same time, I feel a need to resolve my position on life in general, Just lay low, not make any set decisions, focus on my personal priorities and see how things unfold. On that note, I don't really want to dissect Virgo's reappearance on the thread. You know it took some courage for him to present that olive branch to me and I'd like to respect that. He said he thought about it a very long time before he could make the move. For the past year I have thought that all I would have liked from him is an apology to remove the hurt he put in my heart with his hateful last words. So now I have that, and I think I'm going to just let that be enough for now. If he leads me into any more hurt, well shame on me I guess, but I really am engaged in some deep, big-picture kind of thoughts right now. Things with my kids, where I want to be in five years and beyond. I'm not sure that Ariesman or Virgo have any place in that. But anyway, given all my time on the thread, I wanted you all to know that Virgo did find it in himself to right that big wrong from a year ago and that was a very good thing to me.



  • Jen,

    Good for you; glad you got your apology. As you said you both made mistakes and you could have ended the relationship at any time. It's always great to have resolution and peace of mind, I'm happy for you.

    Funny you said your Virgo called you. My Virgo and I have reestablished our relationship (in a new way); perhaps that's why nothing else seemed to work for me. Maybe Mardepp is right things aren't over for us. I realize that I do love him and told him that. I'm not asking for him to love me back. I realize there's nothing wrong with loving someone and they don't love you back. I have several men in my life who have proclaimed their love for me and they are satisfied with just me knowing it, even if I don't love them back. So I feel the same way about Virgo. I do love him but I do realize he probably will never love me and its ok. Sure he said it once but if he cannot say it and look me in the eyes, he probably doesn't mean it. I told him I'm not looking to reestablish what we had before, but now that we are friends again I thought he should know how I feel about him. I feel relieved somehow that he knows. He doesn't believe me and I can understand that given I told him to never speak to me again and we did that for 2 months. I told him that was fine and that I wouldn't be making any overtures towards him. I have been reaching out to him for the past 2 weeks but I told him I wouldn't do that anymore since he seemed to need space and time to digest what I revealed to him. LOL, I said that and who texts me a good morning today? He hasn't done that since we started back speaking, hmmm... I harbor no resentment towards him at all, we both made mistakes as well. He is who he is and he expresses himself in a way that only he knows how. I can't blame him for that.

    I have refrained from dating for awhile and going to concentrate on my new job which begins in 2 weeks. There won't be any chance of me running into him on a daily basis and I really need that. If we see each other HE will have to take the initiative. He knows how I feel and I'm leaving it at that. I'm happy in the space I'm in right now so I think I'll enjoy!

    Hope everything is going well for everyone! I thought someone got their wish and shut this thread down! Enoy the rest of the weekend!


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