The heart of a Virgo man









  • Thank you all for your words, I can totally relate. You know what upsets me VS? Is that he and I had that conversation early on and I was VERY CLEAR on what I was looking for and so was he, and even before getting intimate I stopped him and I said "if you are not sure I rather not do this because I get attached, so if you are not ready..." So I feel lied to, really...now I do not know what to do. I feel that this is the worst situation to be in because he is forcing me to end it, when I would not like to do that...

    Wow! Cool Karma and G4ever, can't believe it!! Same stories, very close. I have yet to see if he shows up. I can relate because I am getting more and more pissed off! We are also being exclusive, exclusive for what I ask? I hardly see him at all. I told him the other day, the same thing you said CK that I didn't sign up for this, that he wasn't ready and he was like, "but I want this". Yeah, but apparently only in his terms, non-existent. I do not know if he will show up, I am just feeling duped at the moment. I keep thinking he has probably lied on other fronts...hoping I am wrong.

    I suspected something like that had happened with the previous women...he has been married twice before so I guess that is red flag enough!

    It seems that is so hard to meet a normal man, just a normal person...goodness. Do you guys think I should write to him and just end it, or is it best to just d



  • It seems that is so hard to meet a normal man, just a normal person...goodness. Do you guys think I should write to him and just end it, or is it best to just do nothing? and perhaps do what you did G4ever and have fun being an observer?



  • mardepp - Your little post there made me laugh. I think "normal" is an illusion and what we all really need is someone who is weird in all the same ways as ourselves. As far as ending it, I don't think you need to make a big thing out of it with a dramatic ending. Just let it fade. You barely see him now, so what difference will it make? His distance and indecision is fueling your distrust of him anyway, as well as your trust in yourself. I think G4ever trusts herself and that's why she can laugh now. She didn't let his antics undermine her ability to stay clear on what she wants for herself. Well done G4ever, you make me laugh too! 😄

    I finally sent Ariesman a text yesterday afternoon wishing him a happy Easter. I was curious by then. He replied right away and told me to call him (didn't ask if I could call him, he told me to call him - why didn't he just call ME instead of text, I do not know). But I was at my friend's for dinner by then anyway and I told him I'd try to catch him later when I was free. So I did call him later and we made plans to get together this evening. Then, at around 5 p.m. he texts me and tells me that he now has his kid. Gee, glad I wasn't looking forward to seeing him or I might have been upset with that kind of incredibly short notice. (I actually didn't mind not seeing him. It postponed us having a "talk" as I'd already had a very long day with work issues).

    I was sharing all of the latest about Ariesman with my friend last night and she has him pegged as the kind of guy who likes to pick fights. Keep things stirred up. You know Virgo told me a couple of times that men like a challenge, they like the hunt. If a relationship gets too easy they lose interest. But the trouble with playing along with that, and behaving like a bi tch to keep things intersting (for the man) is that all you do is succeed in attracting more of the same kind of treatment. (Perhaps evidenced by these guys who come running when you tell them you are through with them). It's all such a load of drama and so draining.



  • yep i know that pissed off feeling so well, am living it as we speak, even tho he has fallen off the side of the earth i will hear from him in the next few day as if nothing has happened, sort of predictable now and really boring to be honest, im not sure what you should do, when feelings come into it they take over sometimes even when you dont want them to, i think in time the lack of contact, them making us feel not needed until they are ready to do so, will evenually make us wake up, my plan is not to give to much of myself, to carry on with life, im actually going on a date, why should i suffer and miss out because some guy isnt sure, as i see it ive told him im done so means im a free agent, lucky me hehehe just a wee tad excited about my date, i wish i could give you the right advice here



  • Ooh coolkharma have fun on your date!

    I also know the pissed off/ hurt feeling everyone here is talking about from my Virgo days. And as I read all the comments lately, the patterns are the same and the story is the same and it just goes on over and over and over with these guys. You spin your wheels in one place and the relationship doesn't move forward so you have no choice but to eventually move forward by yourself. Extra frustrating because you all really do like these guys, you don't want to end it, but who wants to be pissed off and feeling like you don't matter most of the time. No one. So what choice do you really have unless you're willing to just keep living with less than you really need.

    Well I told Ariesman that I'd come by for a while here. I know exactly how I'm going to get on the topic of how he insulted me by insulting my kids. I don't want to be mad at him, but right now I do still harbor resentment about how insensitive he was because I am concerned about where this kind of stuff comes from with him. I will hope to clear the air here soon.



  • Jen,

    I would mince words if I were you. Why should you? Children are a sensitive subject and whether he was joking or not is not the issue, you are clearly upset and he should be told how you feel. Be sure to use "this is how I feel" kind of verbiage so that he gets the message but doesn't feel you are attacking him. It's better you get it all out than to harbor the resentment you clearly feel. Ask him what was he thinking when he said that. Aries are known to be blunt but I don't think they mean to hurt anyone's feelings (unless they don't like you then all bets are off!) Let him know what you expect.



  • I meant "wouldn't mince words"....lol!

    Virgo texted me last night (funny, I wonder when he's going to wise up that he's doing all the contacting?), telling me he was thinking of me and wanted to say good night. I told him I was up studying and sweet dreams. I made no mention of his so-called "thinking of me". Yesterday he wanted to know if he was going to see me outside of work this week. I asked him if he was inviting me? He didn't answer--typical. He called today and told me I looked nice and that he wanted a hug. Boy is he laying it on thick! I am so amused! I should give him some attention because I know that will send him running! What's sad is if he is sincere I don't believe it. Mardepp I suppose you're correct in that I'm become an "observer". I'm wondering what he's going to do next...lol! Coolk live your life and don't expect anything out of him. I'm glad you're going on a date; maybe it will help you to move on. If not just have FUN!



  • Hey ladies,

    I've been reading, catching up. I wanted to share the weekly horoscope for virgos because I thought it was so ironic considering they dish out all this wishy washy behavior. Coolkharma, this one is for you especially, IMO. 🙂

    For the week of April 09 - April 15

    Here comes that love jones, Virgo, and the sweetest hangover to boot.

    Intense, mystical Pluto turns retrograde in your romance zone from Tuesday

    until September 18, making you long for a mind-body-soul connection. Light

    fluffy dalliances are not for you now, so keep your radar up for someone

    who shares your desire for an all-encompassing affair. Warning: you’ll

    still have to monitor your moods throughout this Pluto cycle. Even if

    you’re in the arms of The One, you may not realize how strong your energy

    is coming across. You could inadvertently pressure the object of your

    affections or send ‘em running for cover if you let all hang out at once.

    This is not the time for serving up ultimatums or making epic demands of

    your romantic interest. Instead of pursuing or pushing, strengthen your

    powers of attraction. Draw people to you by getting centered in your power.

    Allow yourself to become obsessed with your own passions and dreams—that’s

    what makes you sexy. Turns out, if you relax and just “be,” you’ll have all

    the attention you deserve. If you’ve known for a while that it’s time to

    cut a toxic tie, now is the time to do so. You’re better off being alone

    than pining for the wrong one. Remember: the way you feel when you’re apart

    from someone is equally important as the way you feel when you’re together.

    All the soulful, sexy encounters in the world add up to nothing if they are

    marbled with gut-wrenching, “Why hasn’t he called yet?!” pockets of

    non-communication. Consistency and integrity are essential character traits

    for anyone who is going to play a starring role in your universe. Now, for

    the best news of the week: on Friday, fiery, go-getter Mars powers forward

    in Virgo until July 3, launching you into a stunningly successful

    stratosphere. Since January 23, you may have felt like you were walking on

    a treadmill or inching along a path that formerly felt like a speedway.

    Blame the slowdown on Mars, which has been retrograde (backward) since that

    day. You’re back on the proverbial Autobahn again beginning Friday. It’s

    going to be a hella busy summer, especially if you take more risks and

    leadership with your life.



  • Hey ladies,

    I've been reading, catching up. I wanted to share the weekly horoscope for virgos because I thought it was so ironic considering they dish out all this wishy washy behavior. Coolkharma, this one is for you especially, IMO. 🙂

    For the week of April 09 - April 15

    Here comes that love jones, Virgo, and the sweetest hangover to boot.

    Intense, mystical Pluto turns retrograde in your romance zone from Tuesday

    until September 18, making you long for a mind-body-soul connection. Light

    fluffy dalliances are not for you now, so keep your radar up for someone

    who shares your desire for an all-encompassing affair. Warning: you’ll

    still have to monitor your moods throughout this Pluto cycle. Even if

    you’re in the arms of The One, you may not realize how strong your energy

    is coming across. You could inadvertently pressure the object of your

    affections or send ‘em running for cover if you let all hang out at once.

    This is not the time for serving up ultimatums or making epic demands of

    your romantic interest. Instead of pursuing or pushing, strengthen your

    powers of attraction. Draw people to you by getting centered in your power.

    Allow yourself to become obsessed with your own passions and dreams—that’s

    what makes you sexy. Turns out, if you relax and just “be,” you’ll have all

    the attention you deserve. If you’ve known for a while that it’s time to

    cut a toxic tie, now is the time to do so. You’re better off being alone

    than pining for the wrong one. Remember: the way you feel when you’re apart

    from someone is equally important as the way you feel when you’re together.

    All the soulful, sexy encounters in the world add up to nothing if they are

    marbled with gut-wrenching, “Why hasn’t he called yet?!” pockets of

    non-communication. Consistency and integrity are essential character traits

    for anyone who is going to play a starring role in your universe. Now, for

    the best news of the week: on Friday, fiery, go-getter Mars powers forward

    in Virgo until July 3, launching you into a stunningly successful

    stratosphere. Since January 23, you may have felt like you were walking on

    a treadmill or inching along a path that formerly felt like a speedway.

    Blame the slowdown on Mars, which has been retrograde (backward) since that

    day. You’re back on the proverbial Autobahn again beginning Friday. It’s

    going to be a hella busy summer, especially if you take more risks and

    leadership with your life.



  • Oops, I think G4E and I posted at the same time. May repost if my original message doesn't magically appear 😉



  • hey virgirl, cheers heaps, looks like we are in for some mostly good stuff, got a date tomorro so looking forward to that, excited a wee bit, annnnnd mr virgo still non exsistant ha, no surprises there, still, as all you awesome chicks have said and keep saying, is it worth it??? no!!!! im becoming the observer also lol, watch this space hahahahaha



  • xD Virgirl that's funny I was just reading the horoscope you posted, and thinking ''oh... ok.'' - I might have been being overly romantic, this week!!

    You know, each moment I'm thinking ''I have to do my best. Less than that is less than she deserves.'' - Would the ''best'' be to do nothing? lol

    At the very least I want to show her that I care.

    I'm talking to R normally now, it seems...

    At the cafeteria, yesterday, I got her some of her favourite chocolate biscuits (she was at home studying, and I figured there was a chance she might not eat properly, with an exam coming up today). It was only 60 cents!! And I gave her those in the afternoon.

    Later, X wanted to go to schedule a hour at the hairdresser, and asked me to come along so she wouldn't go alone. I went with her, and then when we were done, we went past some cafés, and I didnt feel like going home yet so I asked ''Wanna have coffee?''. At that time, when I was about to sit, R called. I asked if she wanted to come as well, but she said she had already had coffee alone awhile ago, and didnt know we were going to have coffee (Well, we didn't know either.. I just decided suddenly.) - and that she was going to go home and study.

    So when I was chatting with X... I see R coming at the end of the street. My face lit up with a smile, not sure if she saw it with the distance eheh.

    So my coffee came with a little heart-shaped cookie.

    I gave it to R, of course. She didn't refuse, so I was happy with that. Did she realize the meaning? I think so. Not completely sure, of course.

    We talked a bit more at night - It was a colleague's birthday (Y - another very close friend of R).

    R called me, and told me she was thinking of what to write on Y's birthday message. And we talked some more...just chit-chat but I was quite happy with the fact that she called me..

    I was so euphoric that I called a friend of mine (also friends with R, since theyre similar in many aspects - B, 9th July Cancer - same week as R, who is 7th July).

    I called just to randomly chat... sometimes it just bores me to be alone at home.

    But when I mentioned it was Y's bday, she offered to quickly make a chocolate cake and we'd go to say happy bday at midnight (in about 30mins). I called R, she said she was in, so I called B back while R called X, and 30mins later we went there (of course I -the only male individual- carried the cake xD).

    1hour later we went back home... and that was it. A good day 😄



  • Hey CK, good luck on your date! The perfect fix for forgetting about someone that is on the fence in the first place.

    HD, awww you sound like such a sweet guy :). Hopefully R's actions (dramatics) will not happen again. If it does you have no choice but to leave her alone because it would be clear she is a drama queen that has some growing to do. Especially if she isn't emotionally evolved enough to see she has a great guy right in front of her face!

    Hey Jen! How did your talk go with Ariesman? Like G4E said, in no uncertain terms should he get off the hook for saying the things he did. Drunk or not drunk, it was wrong, period. I bet he went all quiet because he is morbidly embarassed. Keep us posted.



  • I was wondering someone would be willing to give me a little advice into the Virgo male? I'm a Libra (October 21) and after an rather unceremonious dumping by a particularly passionate Scorpio, got back on the dating horse, and have conversed with a Virgo male (August 30). I honestly have never known a Virgo male..My brother is a Virgo, but he's 8 years younger, and I don't know if he's the norm (very charming, jumps in fast, but a little emotionally distant). Is Libra/Virgo even a decent pairing? So far, he's been polite and it looks like we will be going out this weekend. This morning he texted me at 6 am to say good morning, and as I said, so far he's been nothing but nice. We share tons in common, I like his looks (he's my type) and we are both the same age (43). He's never been married, but I'm at the point where I don't have an agenda (marriage or kids) so is it worth it to give it a shot? Thanks for any insight or info!!!



  • Hello Alex1969!!

    I haven't commented on this thread for awhile...I do keep up with it however. I found this site after the end of my relationship with the first virgo I have ever known....your letter sounded soooo familiar! They are very, very polite in the beginning, very attentive, very charming... they will wine and dine you and make you feel so special. But just beware....virgos are VERY emotionally distant, can be extremely hostile when crossed or things don't go their way. I found mine to be extremely arrogant and as long as things were going his way, things were fine. They almost always start pulling away after awhile....if you end up really wanting to stay with this guy, you have to accept that as part of the relationship. If you try to get them to change or bring up their bad behavior, they will turn against you. You will read this throughout this thread over and over again....it is typical of them. I did not know this until after I broke things off with mine....I am also a Libra and we need intimacy and romance and passion....virgo guys aren't capable of sustaining this for us. They pull away right when you need them most leaving you constantly confused and wondering and insecure. Hope this helps....good luck and keep us posted!!



  • LibraLull, thanks for the insight. Well, I've already decided that I am going to give it a shot based on the fact that we have common interests. i don't know, but maybe being on the cusp of Scorpio, I'm not quite as emotional as Libras are supposed to be? LOL Or, for that matter..maybe it's my life circumstances, because generally, I really don't want to "talk" ad naseum..I do like the physical, but I am fiercely protective of my personal space and time. I'm not looking for someone to complete me, just someone to hang out with (not that other Libra's here were otherwise). So, maybe it might not be a bad match..I don't want to stifle or be stifled? Eh...we'll see, I'll know after the first date whether I'm willing to invest the time 🙂 But I'll keep everyone posted!



  • Hi ladies,

    Alex, welcome to the thread ! I suggest that you date the Virgo and be on your guard for a while, until he proves to be consistently good for you. Who knows, maybe he is not going to fit into the usual pattern, but please be aware that the usual male Virgo pattern of behaviour is not a myth, it exists, and be ready for its appearence before emotionally commiting yourself to him.

    HD, try to avoid the extremes - neither smother R with attention, nor get distant. Be nice, while giving her space to make up her own mind. Glad that you two are talking, but stop mothering her, it could be counter productive at this stage.



  • Thanks VoplySoply!

    I tend to be an optimist and if he's a nice guy, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. I tend to be on guard anyway, so I'll just take it slow.

    So, let me ask..do I let him set the pace? I tend to be busy so I am not the clingy type. Should I show I like him (if it turns out I do) but not be too pushy? I'm fine with "not knowing" if you will, so I'm fine with just letting things go slow..and if he needs to set the pace, that's fine. Thanks!!!


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