Contradictory Reading - Any insight appreciated!
Ok, so i asked the cards of what i could expect from my love life over the next 2 months.
(Celtic Spread) :
1. Issue: The Moon (R)
2. Obstacle: 2 of Pents (R)
3. Past: 2 of W ands
4. Present: 10 of Cups
5. Near Future: The Sun
6. Far Future: Page of Cups
7. Self: The World (R)
8. Environment: 4 of Pents
9. Hopes & Fears: 8 of Cups (R)
10. Outcome: Page of Swords (R)
11. Overall Card (I normally flip the card at the bottom of the deck, and i thought up until this reading here that it normally gave the 'bottom line' and the overall tone of the reading. Perhaps this could be how i'm feeling now??) : 10 of Swords (R)
Ok, so just a little background...
...I've recently just called it off with a man i knew was a 'successful' womaniser. Heart broken, i might add. I've been sitting in my room for the last 3 days - haven't felt so depressed for a veeery long time.
This has only been my second casual experience EVER - it's just not my type of thing, as i've always said, one always falls. Considering the last time wasn't me, i thought - 'well, hey, why not!?'... WRONG.
This time i fell. And HARD. After i allowed hi to toy with my emotions for 2 months, watching him in detail through all of his consistency, i thought it was best i leave now (even though both parties didn't want it to end there) to save myself from a damaging and potentially unrepairable future heartache.
The problem is though, i just have this feeling that although he's put me through absolute emotional hell and hasn't contacted me all week, for some reason, i can just feel that he'll be back. Hence my reading to see what would come of my love life over the next two months. I do have a couple of new admirers also, athough nothing is going on. Not yet anyway. He's put me off totally, for a while i'd say
SO... Help me understand, PLEASE...
Half the cards are absolutely BRILLIANT. The 10 of Cups as my present state is supposed to be able to overide all and any other negative card in a spread - so they say. Then i have The Sun (also a '10') in the near future, which depicts a new offer in love by The Page of Cups in the far future. All sounds quite delightful really!! But if i am feeling so sad that i can't even face the world, how is it that my present card shows as the 10 of Cups? My family life stinks, we don't get along at all, so i can't see it as joy within the home... I just can't grip it???
...I know 10's are a sign of completion, but aren't the 10 of Cups and The Sun, supposed to be the two most luckiest cards in the deck, filled with a meaningful and 'everlasting' love??? Aren't they supposed to be able to shine over any other negative influence also?? And doesn't The Sun predict sometimes, a re-union??? (Oh dear!) Infact, if the 10 of Swords is in there also, doesn't 3 10's in a spread have a significant meaning also?? One of joy, i thought!??
My question then: Why the bad outcome? The Page of Swords (R) & the Overall card, being the 10 of Swords are both full of betrayal, are they not?? What am i missing? How can it be???
And what does the 4 of Pentacles mean from my outsider's point of view?? I'm not currently working at the moment, so i thought initially, perhaps i'd be concentrating all of my efforts into work instead of love? Could that be the case? Although, then i thought that perhaps he thinks i may be possessive and since he loves his freedom, he'd prefer to 'hold' on, to the selfless life of a womaniser??
I just can't grip the contradiction of cards here, and i can't work out what over rules what!?
Is it someone new?
Is he returning?
Has he given up his womanising ways?
Does he feel anything for me?
If it's a new love, am i right to think by this, it's someone younger?
And with an ending of betrayal that it seems, do i quit whilst i'm ahead?
Ohhhhh... Someone please help me make sense of this!
My interpretation of your cards at a glance:
The obstacle and the issue together, The moon reversed. is a symbol of Yesod your emotional foundation being upside down and inside out. You may be experiencing being out of sync with the cycles and natural patterns from within your self, and outside yourself. The obstacle of the 2 pentacles reveals that your financial situation is part of the negative feelings upon your reflection of self. In other words, your own self worth may be feeling damaged by your limited financial well being.
Next, I'm going to jump to the true state of yourself, which is the world card. Here is the message that you are the consciousness the vibration of your experience, the totality you wish to experience is already within. You will come to realize this, (The Sun, Near Future), as the energy of a happy family life and joyful relationships is what you presently desire; and working towards.
You are most afraid of being caught up again, in a shallow pursuit of illusion and veiled romance, and you are consciously aware of his power to draw you in. But unless you address your feelings of self-worth he or another choice will reflect some painful aspect back to you, so you will get to the core of acceptance and total self love.
Lastly, the 4 of pentacles indicates that right around you is the matrix constructing an opportunity for wealth and advancement. Its coming from within your subconscious desire to ascend and shine with certain gifts you've had most of your life.
My gut instinct on the page of swords reversed is he is not to be trusted, wait for the next cycle of attraction to bring you something better suited to your heart.
let me know what you think... I'm new here on the forum and thought you may like my interpretation
....WOW. How long have you been reading cards for? That was really quite amazing, and i thank you in appreciation for taking the time to help me piece it together.
I am quite low on self-esteem of late, and he's quite aware of that too. I've had alot go on throughout my life, and felt he was one in a million, throughout both friend and family, who actually understood me. I know he 'cared' for me, although i know that his heart is open to many people, that's just his nature. I guess this made it worse though, as he provided me with all i ever needed or wanted from a relationship, though he just couldn't refrain from providing for others also. So knowing all my weaknesses, made him just seem shallow in the end, as his help was actually hindering, and he knew it would eventually be that way.
Finances, are definitely quite a big part of it. He was quite a wealthy man, and this fact made me feel most uncomfortable at the best of times. He was most generous in his spending, though i'm the type who likes to hold my own, so i hated that he paid for every dinner date etc. His friends are also quite successful and i met them. He even put me on the phone and advised me that he wanted me to meet his kids. I told him unless i was to play a permanant role in their life, that i wouldn't feel comfortable in doing so. He then advised me of his last relationship. It was a 3 year trip and they even shared a mortgage, though in the end she left him as he still REFUSED (after all that even!!?) to commit to her. So i knew from here, i'd end up being the same. It seems he can love, though not fall in love.
Weird man. Weird ways.
Still though, I'm not sure of a couple of the other things...
The world?? My consciousness? Within me already?? Please excuse my ignorance, but what is it exactly i am yet to realise? Do you mean that i am the type of person who can reach my full potential even after years of self destruction and a smashing of my ego?? I'm sorry, i can't grip what you mean
I known to be quite the leader, although just yesterday, i thought: 'How can i be a leader when all i've wanted is to be led.' Lol. I'm not sure thinking about it for the second time just now, that it's even about being led. I guess it may just be that confidence thing again, and i am looking i guess, for some sort of recognition to motivate my drive in getting back up again. I am able to provide such wise advice for all, however i constantly doubt my own dealings. This is also why this time, i left him. I knew i was being manipulated whether i had hard proof or not, therefore i wouldn't allow his denying and manipulative ways get the better of me. 'I'm right on this, i know it!' , i thought. (So perhaps, i am getting there??) Meh. Not sure.
I understand these issues need to be worked through as you cannot fully love someone unless you also have loved yourself. I am, as previously mentioned, getting much better at it i guess, just trusting that i am finally making the right decision, but i lack a means of support and don't feel i'll be able to singlehandedly lift myself out of that attitude entirely, without some outside reassurance.
I am not close with my family, have never been, so to be stuck here under their roof is actually quite damaging, and since i don't even have a car at the moment, my freedom and independence have also affected my psych.
When you talk about the matrix constructing an opportunity for wealth and advancement - does that have anything to do with his dealings though, considering it was a spread about love? I can't understand why that would come up as my 'influences'?? Perhaps since we called it a truce and decided that there were no actual hard feelings between us in the end, is it wrong to think perhaps he still wants to help me out of that himself? (Not via purchases, via setting me up with like minded business people that he associates with, etc.) ...No? Or is this just coming out of my own search for employment??
I had planned to perhaps go and live in Malta this time next year with a friend of mine who is already there, and today i thought i may have to back out of that, so i wonder if that ties in anywhere?? Do you think? Could it just mean that i will decide to stay 'grounded' at my current place of living?? ...No?
And for the end of it then, will my finances, if i soon advance, be the reason i am betrayed perhaps?
I still don't get the whole 10 of Swords though - when the other cards are so bright. I thought it all would counteract. Does that mean for my finances that it too will all fall apart?? Am i over analysing now?? :s
Excuse the essay of a reply by the way. This has been stalking my mind for days now.
Thank you so much, once again.
Also, i just thought the Moon Rev and the 2 of Pentacles were other means of illusion, distrust, duplicity and an indecision to go back or not. I find it amazing how you just came up with all that!
Overwhelmed by that!