Will he come around eventually?



  • Hi,

    I've been seeing this man named Richard (his dob is 2/6/82 and mine is 2/9/84). We recently made our relationship exclusive. He told me he is in love with me and wants to spend his life with me and its only been a month that we've been together. I told him that I think he's confused about his feelings for me since he doesnt really "know me" to be able to sincerely say he's in love. I told him I wanted to put the brakes on things with us and go little slower. I wasnt implying that I wanted to break up....just slow down some. Now he wont talk to me at all. So my questions are:

    1. Are his feelings for me genuine only after a month?

    2. Is he done with me?

    3. Will I hear from him again?

    4. If so, when?

    Thanks sooo much for looking into this as its starting to stress me out some. I didnt expect that he would be upset by me trying to slow things down so that we dont crash and burn.



  • Hello Leahmya,

    Richard sounds overly senseitive to what you ask of him. He laid his feelings out to you and you put up a STOP sign in his eyes. You have a right to voice your own feelings as well here. The fact that he won't talk to you at all is not a good sign of maturity on his part.

    Richard all in all is a nice fellow and and he did and still does care. He is thinking about you and may get in touch with you after he calms down a bit. This may take another month as his pride will have to heal. In the meantime you need to move forward and continue to date others and see if your feelings for Richard linger . If so than you will know that perhaps he is the man for you.

    Shuabby



  • Thanks so much for your response, Shuabby! I really appreciate you looking into this for me.

    I texted him today to say that I was sorry for doubting his feelings for me and that I just really didnt think it was possible to be in love with me so soon. I told him that I still have feelings for him and I want to be with him, just dont want to rush anything. He hasnt responded at all. I didnt want to end things completely. Are you able to tell me exactly (or an idea) what he's thinking about me at the moment.? Does he want to reach out to me? Is it annoying him when I text him trying to reach out and communicate with him? I didnt mean to hurt his feelings.



  • Leahmya,

    He has'nt responded so please leave him alone now. You did noting wrong just that he expected more than at this time you are welling to give. Some men know that they are ready to marry and start a family. Women also know when they are not. This is what happened in my view. Move on now and just learn from him and have your questions ready the next time so that you will be better perpared and not left on the end of a hang-up.

    Look for a man that has light hair and eyes to come into your life shortly. He will be fun loving and will not want to move fast with you. He will be one that is not ready for marriage and willing to stay and play awhile to see if it is a good love match all the way around.

    Love is on it's way,

    Shuabby



  • Thanks Shuabby,

    I will take your advice and leave Richard alone. It wasnt so much that I wasnt ready for marriage or a long term partner. I just felt that it was too soon for him to genuinely be in love with me. I also felt that if it was true love he had for me, he would have been more understanding and willing to communicate. I guess you dont see him trying to reach out to me again...?



  • I do not know why I am having a hard time letting this go and why this is affecting me so much.