The frustrating Scorpio



  • I've been in a relationship with a scorpio man for 3 years now. It has been great so far. No arguments or anything. I know how he is so I don't push on anything in our lives. He recently started working out of town and works alot of hours so communication is limited. We text several times a week and talk once or twice a week. This past week I made him so mad. I sent a text and he didn't reply so a couple of days I sent another text and he didn't reply. So I sent another text asking if everything was ok...but no reply. Knowing that when he is mad at me he will shut me out I started thinking he was mad so after a week of no contact I texted him several times asking why he was mad and what I did wrong and called several times in a row. He finally called me back fuming telling me that he had been working 14-15 hrs a day all week and then I was blowing up his phone while he was in a meeting with his boss. When I told him that I was starting to worry because he hadnt replied to my texts he told me he was a grown man and knows how to take care of himself and didn't need me to check up on him. I didn't yell or get angry with him..I know better..just let him say what he wanted to say and I said ok Im sorry. He said he needed to shower and get to bed because he had an early morning I said ok and he said bye. That was 4 days ago and I haven't talked to him yet.

    I don't know what to do. Just leave him alone till he calls or maybe send a short text letting him know I am ok about everything he said or what. Im not mad at all and I am very patient with the way he is. He is a true scorpio. I know he still doesn't totally trust me so I feel like I should make some contact to let him know that it's cool Im not mad or have any bad feelings over this....it's our first argument ever. Any advice on what I should do??



  • Hi Librared,

    Ive been with a scorpio for 17 years now and i know how you feel , in my personal opinion i would let him contact you , because the more you try and contcact him the more he will resist you ,I find they can be heartless at times i mean he could have at least have the decency to text you back . you were only worried about him . Scorpios are very hard species to figure out at the best of times , i have started a thread called the heart of a scorpio man as after 17 years im still trying to figure him out . I hope it all works out for you , come and join me on my thread sometime to share your experiences with a scorpio here is the link

    http://www.tarot.com/forum/topic.php?id=14809&replies=13

    Love nd light Loap:)



  • I was feeling like i should wait but i was also thinking about his ex wife who i think closed him off even more. She didnt accept him at all for the type of person he is. I dont want him to think that im like her. I just want to let him know that i still stand by him even during his cold times



  • Hi Librared ,

    Let me tell you from experience it doesnt take much to close off a scorpio , at the end of the day its up to you what you do , but i found as soon as i stopped focusing on my scorp and started focusing on myself he was the one who was texting me all the time . They start getting worried when you attention is not on them, id let him sweat .



  • sorry i meant to write when the attention is not on them .



  • Its your decision , i hope it all works out for you .

    Love and light LOap:)



  • Hey there,

    Im sagiattarius but my rising sign is Scorpio.. I can relate to your Scorpio.. I have acted this way before.. What I can say is dont take it personally.. It sounds like his work has him under a lot of pressure and he is focussing and conserving 100% of his energy on work.. He knows your relationship is fine so he doesnt need to direct any energy towards it (Not saying this is fair).. With your recurring text messages he feels pressure to reassure you and sort that out too but doesnt have anything left as hes giving it all to work.. so he became mad at you (again not saying its fair).. if you text him now it wont do any good.. wait for the pressure of work to subside.. he will then have time to realise he has treated you badly and should come back and apologise..I dont think his withdrawal from you is about you.. its about work.. just let him be and he will be back..



  • Hey Sajartist ,

    Ive been with scorpio for 17 years and have only just learnt not to take some of the things that he does personally . .I totally agree frompast experience , i wouldnt send him a text i would just hang back and see how he reacts .



  • it's hard not to take it personal since he was so mad at me. And to tell me that he didn't need me to be concerned about him since he's a grown man...I wonder if he really meant that. 😞 He did text last night and all he said was that he just got in and his shortest working day this week has been 15 hours. That's all it said. It is emotionally frustrating



  • I can totally understand how you feel , i cant count how many times my husband has hurt my feelings or rubbed me up the wrong way , you are right it is frustrating , remember its only been 3 years for you two , you will learn in time not to take theses traits personally but its damn hard work . If you have a go at him try to keep your cool as they have a way of turning things around so you feel you are in the wrong ,stand your ground dont let him think hes the in the right .



  • Hi Librared

    Your in good hands with Loap but I want to comment on this:

    it's hard not to take it personal since he was so mad at me. And to tell me that he didn't need me to be concerned about him since he's a grown man...I wonder if he really meant that. 😞 He did text last night and all he said was that he just got in and his shortest working day this week has been 15 hours. That's all it said. It is emotionally frustrating <

    There is some truth to what you think. Probably whatever you were arguing about he burries now into his long hours of work. Him saying what he said is half true. He appreciates you worrying just this is the only point/way he can sting you with at the moment. This is odd what I am going to say..but deep down he doesn't mean it. For the fact that he texted you confirms my thought. Whatever you two argued about needs to be addressed as soon as he shows up.

    And it's just as emotionally fustrating since we don't step into a relationship easily after been burned or shot off. No matter how immature the Scorpio person is.

    There are so many threads on this board that can confirm that. Yet you got to remember as why you got interested and why you fell in love with him and why you stuck with him for this period of time.

    I always say trust your guts and trust yourself and then everything should clarify itself in due course. And don't change who he fell in love with.

    Flow



  • All I can say is UGH!!! he just is being himself and i really dont' know how to take it. I'm supposed to be going there for vacation and i feel like I should just not be planning that anymore. He's been upset with me before but gets over it like the next day....hes draggin this on for 2 weeks now. And he's right he is a grown man so he should know better that to to this highschool crap!!!



  • Why dont you not go then?, im sure that will get him thinking of how disrespectful he is being towards you , and it might make him see sense and stop all this pettiness ,but of course at the end of the day its your decision follow your intuition it will lead you in the right direction.

    Im so over scorpios and there underhanded tactics who do they think they are for God sakes

    grrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!



  • HAHAHAHA....LOVE THAT TOP 10!!!



  • Well I guess if he ignores me forever then there would b no point in going. But a part of me wants to drive down there and ask him what the heck....you can't reply on the phone so here I am....in your face! Could he possibly be that mad that he would break up with me???



  • I've been married for 41 years to a scorpio and almost fell out my chair when I read your remark about no arguments or nothing! Can't imagine that at all as my man has been the wildest ride in the park and passion runs deep and fireworks fly although at our age it's mellowed and we are too pooped and it gets old--the butting heads. I agree that when the scorp stings it's best to get out of the way and give him room to decide if he misses you or not. My man in his younger days was often on the road and he was the opposite--drove me nuts with all night phone calls and needing to be close. But go figure, once home he often barely connected if he was busy--that's the thing--scorpios do things with great focus and intensity and it's very obsessive---they can forget the rest of the world exhists when they are in the zone. BUT--they also are ok knowing you are right there---and available if they need. As a young woman this often felt painful to me because my life was smaller--homebound with children and not enough adult contact. Also, scorps can be very self centered about their jobs---they tend to think they work the hardest because they are only connected to their agenda and tend to be clueless about your day. I can not tell you how often my younger scorpio thought I had it easy at home with four kids! He often came home at the scary hour 5 oclock to a crazy house of tired mom and crabby kids and asked me what I did all day! We laugh about that now as he's grown up and much wiser and life tends to educate the clueless in interesting ways. There was a crises when he was mugged and unable to work--I took a job and he got to see what my day was like and very quikly was made aware he definetly had the easy role as the bread winner and at least got to clock out come home and rest while my job went on 24 7. My point is that very rarely have I been able to get my scorpio to GET MY POINT by words alone. My scorpio always responds best to getting the point very sharp and where it hurts most! You cannot force a scorpio to do anything--you can inspire him at best--he has to feel it as that's how they process things--according to how it affects them--that self centered thing. When my scorpio gets huffy with me in a tone that sounds like he doesn't need me I make sure to remind him I am not his enemy--to remember I am his best friend--even when we disagree and he better be carefull what he asks for if he dares shout "just go away, leave me alone". Do I lose sleep over that? Put my life on hold? No--I may have a good angry frustrated cry then I give him exactly what he asked for--all the room he wants and I get good and busy--no fighting--no nastyness just go my own way and cut the chord----and of course his big scorp ego will stand a few days but he suddenly will be all sweet and following me around--do I celebrate? NO--I give him much more alone than he bargained for. The point is they often take your loyalty for granted. How do I know you are loyal?--because Scorpios only choose loyal mates! My advice to you is to get on with your own independant life and get busy----scorpios have this sixth sense for the moment your attention is not on them--that is a valuable scorpio survival secret. I promise you the moment you detach from this issue and put your mind somewhere else he will feel the need to reach for you---you may even get roses and a loving note if you give him enough room to notice he needs you. BLESSNGS!



  • We really havent fought. He has had his moments but I don't argue back....I don't want to fight. He drives a truck and right now he is in South Tx and yes he does throw himself into his work. I do understand that sometimes he gets done almost in time to go back out and he is tired. But pardon my bluntness he can send me a quick text when he is on the toilet!! I am just having such a hard time with this. Ive gotten used to the hot/cold personality but this is more like artic weather...



  • Blmoon i read your story as if its my own , i now after 17 years have just learnt to go about my own buisness and not let it get to me and its been hard at times trying to hold it all in and not have a go back but honestly i find actions speal louder than words , im done with all the game playing , this is how i am now exactly how you described ,

    --I may have a good angry frustrated cry then I give him exactly what he asked for--all the room he wants and I get good and busy--no fighting--no nastyness just go my own way and cut the chord----and of course his big scorp ego will stand a few days but he suddenly will be all sweet and following me around--do I celebrate? NO--I give him much more alone than he bargained for.

    Works for me everytime .



  • LibraRed ,

    I read your story as if its my own as well this was me about a year and a half ago ,

    Well heres my story one night i was extremely upset crying my eyes out over his hot and cold behaviour again, he did something that extremely upset me as we were going through a rough patch and he started becoming distant from me , , well we were in bed and i was sobbing my heart out and he said why are your crying? I said what you did really hurt me , he made like a sighing sound like he was fed up to the back teeth with me ,like i was an annoyance and rolled over turned his back on me and fell asleep while i was sobbing my heart out . I have never been able to forget this as it has hurt me to no end , i would never see anybody crying like that with out giving them a comforting hug ,not even a complete stranger ,. I have forgiven him but i will never ever forget it , but i have to move forward as it will eat me up inside if i dont let it go , im trying but its been hard .



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