I understand my cancer now, how do I get him back?
This is a long one, but I need the insight please! Sparing a lot of details already lol.
I was involved with a cancer guy for a couple months. Things were strange and I spent a lot of time confused (I've come to realize he probably did too). Anyway, we ended up having a falling out, he told me he never had feelings for me and the physical contact meant nothing to him (BS). I was heartbroken, balled my eyes out in front of him obviously hurting and he just pretended that nothing was affecting him. He said he wanted to "terminate our friendship" but literally asked me to go out on a boat with him and some of his friends not even 10 minutes later. I caught him in some petty lies regarding the falling out we had, called him out in a discrete manner but he knew I was hurting and knew he was lying. At the end of the day, my lil pisces intuition is telling me all the hurtful things he did were nothing more than an attempt to protect himself, feeling just as vulnerable if not more than i was.
We share mutual friends and do yoga at the same studio so I see him on a fairly regular basis. It's tense. The more I think about it the more I realize I was tapping to his little "cancer facade" to cover up the deep emotion that was on the other end. Even after the fight he'd sit next to me or facing me but kinda just stay in his shell, acting like nothing was bothering him (I was doing the same thing).. it's like he was mirroring my behavior, waiting for me to say something.
I mean, things were getting tense with us before the fight but I still felt like he had feelings for me. I'd catch him looking at me, he'd always come hang out with me and friends and alone as well, we'd do everything together. I've just come to realize I've cut him so deeply without even realizing it.
After we had that fight he was messaging me on FB saying I was delusional and crazy and what not.. and that he wanted some stuff that was at my house (we both knew I gave it back to him). I feel like it was an excuse to talk to me. I told him how I felt and he wanted "evidence" to support why I felt that way. I told him I had no desire to explain that to him. I was hurting and flustered, what do you expect? He said ok perfect and deleted me... yet he'd still answer the phone when I'd call... idk, I feel like he wanted me to chase him.
As I said before I feel this was just a facade. He was really hurting. We did really have a connection. He was too shy to make a move and I was too so things just kinda became a cluster f*** of emotion. I messaged him on facebook saying that I hope he was doing well and he's been on my mind. Also past misunderstandings no longer affect how I look at him. He hasn't been able to check his facebook for awhile so idk what he'll think of it but he's been on my mind like crazy.
Regardless of all the BS i see the sensitive beauty he is and I find it quite endearing. It took me awhile to see how much I care for him and how deeply I cut him. He's mature in many ways but can handle his emotions in a childish fashion.
so two questions:
Do you think he cares, or cared?
How to I make him understand that I get it now and that I want to try again?
Will he go with it ya think?
if anyone knows much about a cancer/gemini/gemini PLEASE enlighten me! lol.
He's a cancer sun and gemini moon and asc.
I'm a aqua/pisces(more pisces traits tho) sun, leo moon, and scorp asc.
This is actually a fairly easy situation to explain. Cancer, while being a water sign and thus considered an emotional sign, is ruled by the Moon (the ruler of emotions). Therefore, a Cancer is more likely to embody his Moon sign than his Sun sign. Also, when it comes to relationships, I'm a firm believer that the Moon sign is more important than the Sun sign - especially when the Sun sign is Cancer.
This man's Moon is in Gemini and, any time the Moon is in an air sign, emotions aren't acted upon until they have been rationalized. (I'm a Sun in Cancer, Moon in Aquarius woman and that definitely holds true for me). Gemini Moons are better at attending to other's intellectual needs than their emotional needs, so your dramatic emotional reaction (thanks to your Leo Moon) to his actions probably freaked him out a little. Also Geminis in general are flighty, unreliable and aren't very serious people with regards to anything let alone someone else's emotions, so that probably hurt your pride when he wouldn't acknowledge your feelings. That whole "I want us to end, let's go do something together" is classic Gemini.
I don't know this man's chart but a Cancer Sun will have his Venus in Gemini, Cancer or Leo. If it is in Gemini, he would've been attracted to your Aquarius side. If it's in Cancer, he would've been attracted to your Pisces side. If its in Leo, he would've been attracted to your Leo side. It's been said that a man's Moon sign and Venus sign will show how he is in a loving relationship and what he is looking for in a mate.
All-in-all, it sounds like this man is playing with you and I think it's in your best interest to not pursue anything further with him. You deserve someone who will treat you right and this guy clearly isn't up to par. Keep the cordial relationship up, but don't try anything more with him. Hold out hope that there is someone better for you out there because there is and you'll find him when you're meant to.
Peace and love, CALLTV
I dont know much about the moons, but ure situation sounds similar to something i am going thru / wen thru with a cancer so i'll tell you my result...
I mean REALLY similar.
I tried to twist myself into a pretzel to understand his standoffish behavior. I would catch him staring also...excuses to see me also..would never call but always picked up for me but not his friends. always hung on the phone like he didnt want me to go, always looked for excuses to help me run my errands so our time together went longer and on and on and on...
For MONTHS i obsessed and tried to understand why he went from knight in shining armour to "where's waldo", but i'm finally beginning to realize that how he behaves is NOT my fault, not my issue..hes been VERY rude,hurtful and its not fair. Now I know u may not mentally be where I am, and I dont like to rain on other peoples parade. But just for ME, i feel like you are not supposed to work that damned hard in the beginning stages to relate to one another. HE SHOULD HAVE MANNED UP AND MET ME HALF WAY. My cancer is a grown man and he knows how to communicate.
MY cancer may just nt be the healthiest guy on the planet. Maybe one day we'll sort things out and be able to talk rationally like i've always wanted but right now, i'm frustrated at all the ways that i have tried to figure him out and he can just kick rocks.
but of course that is ME not YOU.
happy crab hunt!
Thank you so much for your help guys. I haven't been logged on since I've posted this... shame on me.
Basically everything played out in an interesting way. I ended up seeing him on his birthday jul18 and things were weird, very hot and cold. I was nice to him and let his instability blow over. I see him sometimes now. He now works at my yoga studio so I see him a lot. I allow him to initiate all contact at this point, I really can't handle it anymore. I'll hear from him a lot, some days more intellectual seeming and other days just a "hey :)". So I don't know, I've given up. I did nothing but follow my heart as deep as that may be! I've moved on to a FREAKISHLY captivating Taurus now things are still in the making but the pisces within me is telling me this is going to be interesting in the most amazing way possible! I actually logged on to get some insite about him to.. I'm starting to realize I kinda obsess in silence a little when it comes to relationships... over analyzing natal charts and what not... idk what that's rooted in, some kind of insecurity I haven't discovered yet I guess.
Hah happy crab hunt to you! Thanks again angels! You've just confirmed what I've come to believe!