How To Cope With 21 Yr. Daughter Getting In Trouble!

  • I just don't think I can take her stress anymore. I thought she was doing alright, but now she is worst than ever. I am scared for her. She is ruining her name and her future and she has a 3 yr old she stands to loose. I am in no position to take the child. I already tried. My husband is breathing on oxygen. My mom is dying in the hospital, & other family members in bad heath.

    Guess I needed to vent.

  • Your daughter is old enough to figure things out on her own. You have enough on your plate with your husband and other family members. We CAN"T save our children from themselves. Set her free like a bird that is just learning to fly. She'll find her way. Always rememeber our children are only on loan to us from God. This might be a good time to as him to releive you of this burden she puts on you. Have faith and just ask, beleive me it works.

  • Banned

    I have to agree with "Myviewpoint" on this one --

    As hard as some may try as parents, it always ends up boiling down to free-will. You cannot tie your daughter down and force her to make good decisions. For some kids, you can't even teach them to make good decisions.

    Perhaps she's acting out because she's certain she has a safety net to fall into? You may not be willing to take the child, but who knows what kind of support she may be expecting from you. I'd be willing to wager a guess that you've bailed her out of all kinds of her own doings.

    Perhaps its time to make your position clear to her. I'm not saying have an intervention or anything, but perhaps letting her know that if it came down to her losing the kid, you wouldn't be willing to fill in for her. Even if it doesn't change anything, it'd probably be important for her to know.

    Most importantly, don't believe for one second that her behavior has anything to do with your track record as a mother. She's an adult, and her behavior doesn't reflect on you any more than a stranger's would.

    I suspect you're also well within your rights to share with her what you've just told us.

    Best of luck! I'd love to hear how this one pans out!


  • Hey Nate, Well, it panned out alright, she hit rock bottom, got put in jail on multiple charges, it's just insane. And the place she is at is not like a jail, it's like a minature prison. I am so scared for her. Actually she is not old enough, her dad spoiled her rotten, her brother took up for her, I was not allowed to discipline. She was told that she did not have to listen to me. Well, now she says she wants mommy, & it is just breaking my heart. She never got to be good. Her behavior was always protected by them & some interfering people. She was brain washed. Got to go cook. I'll check back, thankx for listening.

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