Gemini Man/Leo Woman - COMPLICATED! Help please?

  • I don't know much about Geminis as I don't really have too much experience with them. I met a Gemini through a mutual friend online, we talked some and he (as I've heard is often the case) was amazing and sweet. I know part of it was the thrill of the chase as I was into someone at the time, and he "helped" me realize why it was a bad decision to continue on with that guy (which it really was). After a few months we met up when I happened to be vacationing in his neck of the woods. We had a week long thing where he told me he loved me, we decided to possibly give it a try with the long distance thing. Yeah no...that didn't work AT ALL.

    After I got home we started arguing a lot, there was a lot of jealousies on both parts, misunderstandings, insecurities. After months of trying to make it work, we decided that long distance wasn't the right option for us but have stayed friends. I still care for him a lot and he still cares for me too.

    The thing is what's been going on recently. We're still very much attracted to each other (the sex was great, I have to say) and I recently got accepted into a study abroad program which will put me in his area (I had planned on doing this before he and I got involved) in about 6 months time. We've made plans, he's expressed that he can't wait to see me, can't wait to spend time with me, can't wait to introduce me to his friends and family, etc. I've discussed my interest in possibly trying again, but he has a tendency to give off the little vague "We'll see what happens" comments.

    He's very mixed messages, and I'm not sure what to think. After we split he started seeing someone else (not exclusively), but during that time he was telling me he couldn't get me out of his head and he would blow off time with her to talk to me on the phone or online. He still gets extremely jealous when I'm shown male attention (to the extent that he recently searched out the e-mail address of someone who pursued me and told them in a very articulate multi-paragraph e-mail that they don't deserve me), he still says he thinks about being with me long-term sometimes, he still is very much attracted to me, he loves nothing more than to talk to me. He shows that he cares in various ways (telling me things he doesn't tell others, doing things when I ask him to that he wouldn't normally do such as see a doctor which he HATES, being fiercely protective, giving me sweet compliments when I least expect it). But he's also said he's not "in love" with me, although he does love me, but that "he could see himself falling for me easily".

    I'm not really putting my life on hold, I plan to see what happens when I study abroad, but it is a little annoying not knowing the true extent of the situation.

    I have no freakin idea what to think here! Anyone care to shed some light on this crazy Gemini man? Or even just give some feedback. Whatever works 🙂

  • if a man tells you he isnt in love with you , then he isnt. there is no mixed message in that statement. I would concentrate on your studies and put your energy into someone that "is in love with you". it sounds to me like he wants to date you, has fun with you, attracted etc,,, but has no intentions of committing to you . so if the sex is good, as you said, then keep it at that ,, but dont expect a relationship with him, or pass up a relationship with another man that you may be interested in.

  • my man is also gemini. are they faithful?

  • Suddenintake,

    Everything you said is familiar. My friend's a gem. My dad's a gem. My sis is a gem. They are generous, kind and fun, and loving. In terms of romantic relationship, a gem comes with great enthusiasm. He loves the chase. He loves the mystery. He loves mental exchanges. He loves the "S" thing. The twin that he is, he gets bored, could be confusing because he sees many sides of a situation, gets easily distracted. But he's not a liar - or let's get this straight. He tells you what he feels at the moment, which makes what he said true. This could change temporarily because he's a very curious person. He wants to see what's going on the other side of the hill. That's where the difficulty lies. He could not commit because he would be weighing his feelings hundreds of times. The fact that he comes back could mean something. My suggestion is to take it easy. Enjoy his company. Become good friends. He needs to mature to make that commitment. While he's not sure, he will not commit. Sometimes, it takes decades for this guy to realize what he really wants.

  • Thanks for the insight everyone. I think you're right. I'll definitely take things as they come. Right now he's the only person I'm interested in, but I'm still open to someone else should they come along. Glad to learn something about Geminis too!

  • Suddenintake,

    I saved this item below from an old forum topic because it is a personal note from a gemini revealing who they really are. I think it would help you figure out your friend.


    A couple of things t note about Gemini - coming from a Gemini.

    I've read alot of people have trouble with us becuase of 'fickle behavoir, mixed signals, and sudden withdrawl from conversation.' If I could shed some general light on that....we are analyzers - we look at the situation, the conversation, the relationship in approx. twentybillion ways. That means we are constantly doubting and questing our action and others motives.
I.E. There was an individual with whom I was in love with for nearly two years, I was constantly around him while in the company of others and I would feel the need to almost hide from him. I wouldn't talk to him because I was in doubt whether he really even liked being around me, ect. I didn't want to annoy him, or displease him.
ALOTof the time us Gems, will do things like that (which from you're perspective is an indication of disinterest or possibly indifferance/anger ect.) because we doubt our own actions and how our feelings/thoughts will be recieved by others. We will dance around conversation, eye contact, even passing by a person, because we fear doing the wrong things or sending the wrong signals to them. And yes we KNOW this only accomplishes the very thing we seek to avoid... But as many of you experienced in dealing with us know, we haven't usually found a better way.
Our biggest PROBLEM: We don't know how to handle ourselfs! Or for the matter what to do with ourselves...There's so much/emotion/thoughts surging about us in regards to situations that we feel overpowering and repelling, we're afraid to be overwhelming and thereby push you away. And yes we KNOW that the way we try to avoid being overwhelming only makes us appear even more overwhelming. We pent up those emotions and thought so can make our control at expressing them come EVEN WORSE.

    But mark this:
If we love you, we mean it! We'll hang before we would ever lie about our EMOTIONS, because what we crave above all else is to be understood......If we reveal something of our emotions to you - it is honest to a fault unless we are lying to ourselfs. (and we can convince ourselves/delude ourselves into believing pretty much anything we want to. Although we try to avoid doing so because we know the consequences are ugly) Make us feel understood and we're your's forever. But if we feel like we aren't expressing ourselfs in a way you can understand you will KNOW it. And we become overwhelmingly frustrated with ourselves, and hung up on trying to MAKE YOU understand us.
BUT we will alwas have your back. We are very trusting, we seem suspicious because we analyze all behavior - but our motive doesn't arise from distrust so much as a wanting to understand you. We want to figure you out.
*If we feel as if we've figured you out - then we believe you CAN figure us out. We don't know why....thats just part of us.
There's a differance between trusting you, and trusting that you understand us. If we trust you we'll take a shower of bullets for you without batting an eye. If we trust that you understand us, we can be sure that we're capable of taking the shower of bullets for ourselfs, rather than doubt our resolve and strength.
You make us feel strong. We make seem overly confident, indepedent ect. But inside the fluxuation of emotions and thoughts can't keep up with our rationality. and this condradiction often results in the paradoxal behavoir we exhibit. We love illusions in that we are visionaries. We feel we have the abilty to make anything happen if we truly want it. That meansif we aspire to appear a certain way - we ill convince YOU but the problem is we can never FULLY convince ourselves.
8We are a paradox, and enigma, the twins of many personalities. We can't make up our minds about who we want to be. So we try to be eveything at once and thus we seem four diffrent people, because the aspects of personality we want to draw on simply don't fit into one uniform character. We are a puzzle because we are made up of a bit of everything...and we want to be solved because we can't solve ourselfs.
We create a vision but need you to help us believe in it.
If you experience problems with a Gemeni its probably because they're tyring to fufill their absolute NEED for a solver. If you are that is good.
BUt be warned (If you'll excuse the extended metaphor) If you only see half, only choose to recognize the peices you like and discard that you don't - then the puzzle will never be complete and we won't stop looking for for the missing peices......

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  • So true!

  • Tellstar,

    Thanks for that! I do appreciate you posting that note (and thank you for the Gemini who wrote it, if you ever happen to read this!), He and I are very close, that much is consistent, even if he does say I do his head in haha. Actually that even makes more sense now that I've read the above note. Maybe he's having some trouble understanding me too. Well I want romance from him, it's true, but first and foremost we're friends, and I can deal with that. I'll just take things as they come and hopefully something good will come of it.

    Thanks again everyone 🙂

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