I am about to die.

  • why my married life have been so horrible can anybody tell me? Why????? though i am very good faithfully/honest/sincere/and good mother why my husband always hate me always say me bad words. till now i got two married my first husband have two children. Now from 2nd husband have one soon who born on 2007 he always drinks at evening doing very bad to me sometimes he beat me lot also i never done anything to him neither told anybody.

    Why he is doing to me so, he is 3 years younger then me also i have total children. He also 2nd marriage. I think i will die one day i can't stand anymore i cant bear anymore. He is not leaving me also neither stay nicely single night since 2006 i am in hell tho. feet on earth. Now i have decided that i should leave the world. My karma is not lucky. what u all say? he had eaten all my wealth also now i dont have nothing.

  • Hi Biren

    You do have everything to live for your children you must be strong for their sakes is there any family or friends that you can go and stay with? If you are as dreadfully unhappy as you say its time to start taking action i would tell him he must leave one more time and if he wont then its up to you to make the first move i know that it s easier said than done and im sure you are worried about how you will cope financially can you apply for benefits with young children in the country you llive in ?you need to check all this out , and you need to try and change your way of thinking this is only a phase it wont last forever think of your kids and how upset they would feel if anything were to happen to you and if you wernt around it would play on their minds for the rest of their lives .Please take some time to think you are those kids whole being you are their be all and end all this wont last forever i will be waiting to here from you on this thread as i am very worried please let me know you are ok

    Lots of love and light Loap:)

  • Dear Biren

    Don't let noone get you down. You need to be strong and know that you are worth more than you know. Everyone goes through bad marriages, but you need to find help and get out if you are not happy, especially if it is abusive. Remember you are number one and your kids need you. Noone is worth dying for. Please take care of yourself.


  • biren tell him to leave and if he goes after you call the sheriffs!!!! you need to be strong for your children once he is out get a restraining order & file for divorce your city should have some sort of legal aid office go to them they will help and like livinonaprayer stated apply for aid for you & the children and document everything in a journal you can come thru this for yourself & children

    [lease let us know how you are doing we are here for you

    prayers & blessings to you

  • Dear biren,

    For your sake and for the sake of your children, you need to get yourself professional help. Get out of that relationship. Don't ask him to leave, you have the free will to leave. If he is being abusive, turn to the police. Turn to women's support groups. Find a shelter, then get yourself some counselling.

    Much love & light to you biren,


  • Hi Biren

    I hope that you are feeling better by the time you read this please dop us a line to let us know that you are ok my thoughts and prayers are with you .

    Love and Light Loap:)

  • Dear Biren,

    Sharing your heart with us here is a brave and important first step, and we're grateful for your trust and concerned for your safety. Please be assured that you are not alone. Your shoes are familiar to many of us—myself included—and many have found their way to a better life. You can do the same, and we can help. Know that you ALWAYS have a choice between love and fear. And the choice you make will have lasting consequences not only for yourself, but for your children also—you cannot protect them if you are not here.

    Part of an abuser's strategy is isolating his target—your safety and your children's safety lies not in silence but in speaking the truth as openly as you can. When we are abused we often feel we are to blame and so we hide our pain because of our shame, but the shame is not yours, it is HIS.

    You have taken half of that hardest first step by posting here. Please, please call your local women's shelter if you have one, or a friend or family member or law enforcement (if you feel you can safely do so)—anyone you feel you can trust—and make plans to get yourself and the children to safety as quickly as possible.

    I promise you that when he cannot touch you, you will feel a huge weight has been lifted from you, and you will have both the desire and the strength to carry on, and very soon you will feel joy and a renewed sense of yourself again. You say you have nothing, and that may be so. But as the saying goes, "when you have nothing, you have nothing to lose," so in that sense you can feel truly free to go, and make your way toward the light and find your feet beneath you and truly live again. You deserve a life free from abuse and fear, and so do your children. If you need a referral to a safe haven, please let us know and I am sure any and all of us will gladly assist however we can.

    Blessings and a warm golden sphere-shield of love-light around you, that darkness cannot penetrate. Be safe and well, Biren, and when you can please let us know how it goes with you.

    Hugs, courage, and love— gd

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