Im confused? Should I just move on?!?
Ive been involved with someone for 6 months. Back and forth. A disaster. No idea where it was headed. Maybe I missed a lot of opportunities with him. Who knows what the situation is. Basically at this point Im done. I guess. I dont know what to say to him or even to bother fixing it. It was just sex. He said it was. I pushed and pushed constantly with what he wanted. His actions spoke differently. During this down time with him Ive contacted others. Tried to tie up loose ends. I feel pushed to just move on. People keep walking into my life and I got this kind of idea that maybe I should give other people chances. I dont know. Basically I said a lot of terrible things to him and it hurt me a lot that I said those things but at the time I was frustrated with how things were going. That so many chances were missed with us. Point is he said I wasted 6 months of his life. So really Im going way back to certain areas in my life. Dont know if I should keep holding on. I hate the idea of sitting here feeling like a total fool thinking up things about him.
I had so much going on the time we met and for him to be so selfish and to make me feel like I should have appreciated time with him or whatever and the stuff he did for me is just wrong. He knew out of everybody first hand all the stuff that was going. He was involved with it before I even became interested in him. So he throws fits and pouts and expects me to be understanding. this guy has no idea the seriousness I felt towards the changes going in my life at the time. He had no right whatsoever coming into my life at the time. He had no right thinking it would all be sweet.
Yet this guy expects me to conform to his lifestyle to accept what hes bringing to the table. Not fair at all. So I sit here and I look him up and feel like Im not figuring him out. Im not wasting not one more minute trying to figure a guy out. You either want me or you dont. Play too many games. I admit I played games too. But what do you expect. I want to move on.
So basically while hes wherever he is doing whatever and whoever Im sitting here single and about ready to take hold of someone. Cause I shouldnt have to wait for someone. If he says its done its done I guess. He wont give me my stuff back either. Which I did give to him so really I guess its not mine anymore.
Could someone please give me a reading on this situation? and is it done? Im so sick and upset.
You need to trust your instinct and follow your heart, which is yearning to be free. You know within yourself that this is over. Time to let go now.
But don't go looking for someone else just yet. Take time out for yourself to heal your wounds. To recover your emotional and physical health.
3 to 6 months comes to mind. That's recovery time. You'll feel much better in 3 to 6 months time.
Thank you Piscean Healer. You are right Im done with it. Completely. Walking away. The way he acted when I was at my lowest is just wrong. Regardless if I have issues with trust & control he shouldnt use that. I went straight to him from somebody else and he basically makes me feel stupid as if I drug him into this. He approached me. I want to walk away and not look back because right now Im not in any place to leave any kind of control over to anybody else. I fear losing everything with this guy. Dont trust myself much and that shouldnt be in any kind of relationship. He should be watching out for me. Understanding me. At the same time I should be watching out for myself. He has constant serious suspicions of me.
Either way I made up my mind. I dont want him at all. I want my peace back my strength and head forward. Please pray I get these two jobs Ive applied for. Help me to push forward.
My plan for the next year is to get back to work. Then apply for school in New York City. Its been my dream to move there.
Good for you. You are following your heart, your dreams. I promise you everything will start to fall into place as long as you keep up this new, better attitude.
You're healing carly83. It's going to be rough, you are going to have some real down days. But just remember what you wrote above. Stay on this path and well within a year you will see you are in a better place.
My prayers are with you
Love & light to you,