Need some help



  • I need some help in understanding my man. I want to be with him but it feels as though the universe is against this otherwise we'd be together already? and I really dont know why this is?. I feel he is my soulmate/twinflame and would like to know if this is right or am I crazy to feel this?, I have no basis for my feeling this other than I felt it ever since I met him. Is he my soulmate/twinflame or am I wasting our time and just should let go once and for all, which is totally not what i want to do at all. Ever since i met him I have wanted to be with him but it seemed as though he did/does everything to hurt me and push me away for his own insecure reasons I dont understand. Even though this is the case I do love him and he has my heart for all time yet I am continually tested to 'prove' my love towards him and this is really starting to piss me off and am getting fed up with it coz when I love someone I truly love them and for him to treat like shit is rather annoying, I would prefer to be alone and by myself instead of with someone who does that. I have come out of a relationship of 9years and met thisguy and ever since I am certain within that we are meant to be together but am not sure why we arent? Could someone plz tell me why this would be so? or am I wasting my time? I am over myex and never want to be with him coz he treated me like shit and am now realising this and am feeling better each day for leaving him and feeling stronger within myself. Would this be a factor for my man and I not being together? Is the universe telling me my man isnt my soulmate or is it something else? and also I want to know what is it that my man wants from me? Plz someone help would be much appreciated.



  • Crazycap, it looks to me that you fall for men who enjoy hurting you (your ex, the present guy). I don't think this new guy is your soul mate, no matter how much you are attracted to him. Soul mates don't hurt and "test" each other. Sadist do that. In fact, I would question the nature of your attraction to him - did you parents/siblings/friends treat you badly as a young child (like cruelty or neglect) ? If that's the case, that's what "love" means to you. Cruel/distant men feel familiar, and you think that you "click", while in fact you just respond to familiar emotional situaton. You have to start loving yourself first, then in time you won't be attracted to abusive/distant types anymore. What you are doing right now is called emotional masochism. You are replacing one abuser (your husband) with another, and will keep doing so until you realize that you invite this kind of behaviour into your life, just change the faces. You deserve better, like any other living being. Good luck with loving yourself enough to stay away from those who hurt you !



  • By **** I meant s-a-d-i-s-t-s, by the way.



  • Do you believe that there are soulmates/twinflames? or is this a stupid thing to believe or feel or what? Is there such a thing? How does a person recognize a soulmate/twinflame when they come into there life?



  • VoplySoply thank you for taking the time to reply



  • I believe all of us have certain number of soul mates, and even bigger amount of twinflames:-)

    But we often confuse addiction with soulmateship.



  • Well thanks again for your reply



  • Well thanks for pointing that out, it is much appreciated. I have moved from where I once lived and now in a position to be able to sort this out. Thanks for replying.



  • Oh also I am going to use this to move on from the past its like a stepping stone to a new start for me and I for one am glad it has happened coz now I can see myex is the sadistic one and I seem to attract these types so must find a way to not. Also this has allowed me to move on and never look back, thanks again Voply Soply!



  • Very good luck to you, Crazycap. Stay strong. You deserve all the best things in life. Hugs.



  • Sorry but i think myex isnt the sadistic one, the relationship that we had together didnt work out and I moved and now am moving on.



  • Crazycap, of course you know your ex better to judge whether he was sadistic or not. Either way, if he was treating you like ****, according to you, that certainly does bring the word abuse to mind.


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