Libra, needs advice/reading on relationship please!
Dear Captain and other readers,
I just stumbled on this forum today and now I'm desperate to have some insight thoughts on my relationship life.
I started dating quite late after I turned 28, my very first attachment started Nov 2009, he was an Aries, 5 years younger, it lasted for 4 months through our first silent fight. It took me about 6 months to let go of him, and then instantly I met my second attachment, he was a Cancer, 6 years older than me, we started Nov 2010 and once again the relationship lasted for 4 months. The time period in my two relationships was identical, the only difference is, the experience I had with the second one was much more positive, fulfilling. I felt like he was just 'karma' came in to replace for what I've missed out or been taken advantage of by my first experience, and when the length of my first relationship expired, his interests in me dimmed out quite abruptly.
There was no fighting, it was just us not seeing each other for a few weeks, and I was feeling the fading motion from him. My guts was screaming out to me for a month to end the relationship and I did, because he admitted that he was too much of a workaholic and doesn't have the enthusiasm to make time for me anymore. So I said good bye, good luck to him and walked out.
It has been nearly 5 weeks and I'm supporting myself to get back on track again.
But I can't help to wonder, is it something wrong with me when it comes to relationship that I can't keep a partner for longer than 4 months?
Or was my first relationship was just a stuff up and my second relationship was just good karma, giving back what I didn't receive.
I'm very conservative but my philosophy in a relationship is being honest, care and give supports to my partner.
However most of them always seem to be acceptable of whom I am in the beginning but then switch off overnight....
So I'm lost...
Thank you for your time.
P.S I do have picture of my second relationship if anyone interested to do a photo reading.
Can you post photos and/or birthdates of those concerned so that we can tune ino their vibes?
Hardly anyone gets relationships right the first or second time or even several times after that. It's a lifelong process of trial and error, and of understanding our relationship with ourselves well first before we begin a relationship with anyone else. So don't beat yourself up if you make a few mistakes along the way - it's how we learn how to do better next time. Don't mourn the end of a relationship - see it as a learning class that you graduated from.
Other peoples vibes have nothing to do with you having a relationship you desire, they are in the past and you can move on. Its your vibes you send out that matter. It takes a whille....the right true love finds you. Honestly you are a magnet of what you attract. Relationships reflect you. Are you getting out there and ivolved in activity? Are you able to be happy single? Do you really feel you have hapiness to share with others? Assess yourself. Are you in the right place with yourself? Relationships that are divine are menaingfull and no birthdatews will help to examine a real relationship in reality. Those are ambiguous ideals. You if you are really ready will have a set established boundaries, values and beliefs for self, a partner and a relationship. You must send your desire and act upon it to tell the universe so it may send it back. If your lost your not ready and lost oftten means self abandonment thus abandoning relationships...not until you are able to address your own problems with your self knowledge and practical thinking, face fears, remove past...you may not manifest what you want, you must be able to figure out yourself and not be "lost". Also two relationships is not enough to be so down..it was only two....you may go through 5 more...just take each one for what it is in the now, and be happy taking life as it comes, try not to jump to expectations, or scrutinize with astro that holds no proof...that will cause confusion and block your clarity of the reality of the situation. Your ok, stay positive and make sure you always have a focus.
Thanks Captain for your prompt reply.
Here is the first photo that I took with my 2nd ex.
Mine DOB is Oct 15 1981
His Jun 24 1975
I'm generally very up lifting and independent, I do reach out to people by inviting others to come along if I want to participate in social activities, but if no one can make it, I would still go out to enjoy the event on my own. I don’t sit around and wait for invites, if there is a certain things that I want to do, I will make sure I get it done.
I understanding being ‘lost’ could means ‘self-doubt’, however this is not generally my motive, I have moments of down, but then I pull myself up again and start planning, setting out new goals to achieve and I am still doing it.
I guess my experience in relationship is quite limited, I used to think, “you threat people the way you want to be treated”. Always open to learn my weakness and strength, but it’s hard when you don’t get told on the reason that caused the fall out of the relationship when at the previous time we met that person was still saying that he sees us growing old together, I think it’s a new learning curve to accept that people can change very quickly.
May lesson be learned and then move on to the next chapter.
What I see I this photo is a scared child with a father figure. I don't believe you are looking for an equal relationship but for someone to take care of all your wants and needs and do everything for you. Of course, when you want this, you will also get someone who will boss you around and tell you what to do. Wanting to remain a child means you get treated like one. You get what you ask for. Something in you is searching for the good or available father you never had.
And I think you split with him because he was not giving you the time and attention you crave.
Indeed Captain, your observation is very obvious..the Father Figure ideal. Very common but comendable. The time and attention thing was put in her above thread as well. This is soo common I even went tthrough this "phase" My Father left at 15.....and yes it will get you "bossed". People also get "childish" in love. They do not realize the severity of a real Partnership. They speak way TOO SOON and cannot fullfill their premature words. Take it for what it truly is in the now and make the best of it.
TfromOx your a b eautifull woman and i can tell you have a innocent giving nature......the next thing for you is to be the ruler of your own roost......more strength and confidence but also forthright about what you want and deserve.
Thanks for the observation.
I will use your comment wisely.