Anyone want to get out an issue just chat about relations welocme:)



  • Dear Patchlove,

    Your words give me the strength for my inner spirit to continue to move forward and not to regress in depression.

    In this time of shock and misunderstanding of my husband's actions God has still given me many blessings.

    My marriage was short to my husband. I had to confront some health problems without my husband being at my side during the darkest days of my life. But what counted was that God held my hand, God blessed me by removing the cancer from my small body and God gave me much more than my husband could ever give... life.

    Rooster5



  • So good to see you Rooster,

    Yes, God is with you,and the love he has for you cannot be matched by any human on this earth.

    Though you opened your heart fully to love, your husband did not. I'm not sure what his agenda was...but loving and nurturing you wasn't in it.

    Though his true motive came at a most inopportune time....it actually came just in time. So much better for you to know now than having years of heartache down the road.

    You still have time to find the precious soul who will love as fully as you do. And if not here, dear Rooster, there...it will be waiting.

    So glad you are feeling better. Much love and peace to you through unseen arms.



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  • hello all,

    I'm so sorry about not being able to keep up. things are going well. My Gemini man and I met up on Saturday and spent the evening together. he really treated me well and we reconnected so wonderfully. I'm still VERY weary on where this is going but at least he's putting in effort which means that he wants me, has feelings for me, and wants to work on us. he's still unsure about where his job will take him but he seems like he's more sure about how he feels about us. that could change at any moment since he's so wishy-washy but for now I think I just need to give him reassurance and he will settle. he's finally opened up to me, which makes me feel good. I'm hoping to see him again soon, but I'm leaving the ball in his court.

    and yes, I did have to fight for him and prove to him that I loved and cared about him. he's super insecure with himself, and I really think he needed that boost and reassurance from me that I still cared about him.



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  • Rooster5,

    How are you doing? Please let us know when you can. May you feel loving vibrations intended for you.



  • SV,

    Good on you and I see growth on your end too.

    xxx

    Flow



  • Well..I just need to vent. I don' seem to have anyone to vent to in real life w/o sounding like a total stubborn brat! I'm 29 year old and I have never been in love before. I've never had a real boyfriend. I've had relationships but each time it only lasted like 2 months and I only dated them out of either boredom or desperation! It frustrates me b/c i think I'm a really good catch! Why am I having such a hard time in this area? I hear that i must be picky..but I just like what I like. I refuse to settle and b/c of that...I fear that I will die an old lady with a bunch of cats for companionship!



  • And i get really frustrated with friends that always come to me with relationship problems. My friend last night was upset b/c her new beau didn't respond to her text message. They had been texting all day and this time it's taken him an hour to say anything back! I'm like..hey AT LEAST you have someone to talk to! I'm alone over here!!!



  • Mizgator-

    Tell me exactly,

    I've had relationships but each time it only lasted like 2 months. - why? what was the real story - what did you do in these relationships, what did your exes do as well? please tell complete details.

    I only dated them out of either boredom or desperation!

    -- why did you settle for less? why did you play with their feelings out of your boredom?

    It frustrates me b/c i think I'm a really good catch!

    -- what makes you think that you are a good catch? how did you know you were? did your exes tell you that you were a good catch? only your ex partners have the right to say this if you were a good catch because they were the ones you had relationship with you.

    I refuse to settle

    -- really? are you sure? how about the thing you said above that you dated them and had relationships with them out of your boredom and desperation? you sound contradicting. i can only offer my advice to people who are honest with themselves and are willing to acknowledge changing themselves for the BETTER.



  • 2xoxoxo8,

    Tell me exactly,

    I've had relationships but each time it only lasted like 2 months. - why? what was the real story - what did you do in these relationships, what did your exes do as well? please tell complete details.

    Ok, I didn't think I had to give details as to why they didn't last more than 2 months. I've only had 3 total relationships in my life time. The last one ended back in 2006. The first relationship I was 18 years old. I started dating the guy b/c he was cute and funny. At that time I was also in what was considered a religious cult. Our relationship was dictated by our elders and we couldn't do anything without being supervised. I ended it b/c to me it wasn't real.

    The 2nd relationship i was in right after I decided to leave the "cult". I started dating someone who also left the group. We dated more so out of convenience than anything else as we both experienced the same thing and both were ostracized by friends. I moved away after I graduated from college and that was the end of that relationship.

    The 3rd relationship..I did date him b/c we were pretty much dating with no titles. So, I said why not make it official?? I didn't play with his heart or emotions. It was just one of those "why not" situations. I did think that we could work out eventually which is why I did give him a chance. That was back in 2006.

    I only dated them out of either boredom or desperation!

    -- why did you settle for less? why did you play with their feelings out of your boredom?

    I think I explained this above.

    It frustrates me b/c i think I'm a really good catch!

    -- what makes you think that you are a good catch? how did you know you were? did your exes tell you that you were a good catch? only your ex partners have the right to say this if you were a good catch because they were the ones you had relationship with you.

    I think i'm a good catch now! I'm speaking from my opinion of myself.

    I refuse to settle

    -- really? are you sure? how about the thing you said above that you dated them and had relationships with them out of your boredom and desperation? you sound contradicting. i can only offer my advice to people who are honest with themselves and are willing to acknowledge changing themselves for the BETTER.

    When I say that I refuse to settle i'm speaking presently. I'm well aware that I settled in the past which is why I refuse to do that now. Because that never works. Clearly my last relationship was 5 years ago. I could have dated since then if I just wanted to date for datings sake. It's not contradicting as i have learned from my past experiences.



  • Oh and the last relationship ended b/c he changed shortly after we became an item. When we first met he had a job, his own place, car etc. When we started getting serious he quit his job, got kicked out of his apt (then moved in with me) and couldn't keep up payments on his car so he lost that too. i SUPPORTED us for as long as I could. Although I broke it off 2 months later..I couldn't force myself to put him out on the streets. So he lived with me, used my car, ate my food, etc for at least 6 more months. Every time he got a new job he would quit days later saying he couldn't handle it. This happened 3x. I was basically being used. He stayed in my life until the lease was up and I moved out and he moved back to his home state to live with his mom.



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  • So Mizgator - since all these relationships didn't work out because the men ended up using you does this mean you are looking for the opposite of these men that you fell inlove with?

    Does it mean you are looking for a man who will not depend on you - paying bills, lease, car, have a full time job, and a man who will support you instead of a man "using" (like what you labeled it as) you?

    These things (you paying bills, supporting him until he becomes stable with his career, distance) are only tiny matters compared to what you feel for the man and how you value your relationship. It should not weigh things down and lessen the love you have for him. Instead you should understand that he is different from you. The moment you try to control the situation to your favor and control him by trying to change him rarely works. Instead you have to accept the man for who he is and what he can offer you.

    Do you think if you found a more stable guy (who earns much more than you do), a guy who is exactly the opposite of the men you met in the past, your relationship will last? If yes, why? Have you thought about that if it was really the men you meet that has a problem or it was you?



  • Also I noticed that you were the one who choose to end things with these men because they can't be the kind of person you want them to be, then you wonder why your relationships doesn't last that long. If you are looking for a man who have the same lifestyle as you, same mindset, same beliefs, everything the same - what else is left to love, accept and compromise when you are looking for someone who mirrors you. You can't always choose the easy route and the ones that will only give you pleasure.



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  • Dear Patchlove,

    I drove down South with my daughter and a girlfriend to get my things from our home in Mississippi.

    I was shocked that my husband had changed all the locks on the house. I had to plead with the landlord to give me the keys to the house. The doctors only gave me three days to travel due to my fragile body. I was so sick that my heart began to suffer and I could feel my blood having a hard time pumping throughout my heart causing pain in my chest..

    Then my daughter had seen my husband with his new girlfriend and said we got to hurry.

    My husband would even give me a glass of water. He just watched me suffer in agony and would not help me.

    My daughter and girlfriend scurried to get my things in the truck. They were able to get the big items into the truck. I was so greatful they worked to get my things.

    The kitchen was a mess and it looked like it was not cleaned for days.

    Then my husband started to kick my boxed items around with his foot. I said to him I don't do that to your things don't do it to mine. That is when my husband grabbed me by my arm and left significant bruises on my left arm. You could even see his fingerprints on my left arm.

    I was just trying to get my things from the house.

    My husband just kicked me out and would not let me stay to rest. I had to get a hotel room eventhough my name was on the lease.

    I could feel that my bed was slept in by his new girlfriend. My husband couldn't even wait until I moved my things out before he moved her in our house. He even told me that he would get her to do bodily harm to me.

    I filed a police report for domestic abuse. I never thought he would do this to me.

    I am so glad I was able to come away from this relationship. I couldn't wait to leave Mississippi.

    Now I must look forward and not backwards.

    Rooster5



  • Dear Rooster 5

    Im so sorry to hear this , no one deserves to be treated this way i did a tarot reading for you a while ago here is the link

    http://www.tarot.com/forum/topic.php?id=14536&replies=10

    I hope that you are feeling ok My thoughts and prayes are with you ,

    Love and light Loap:)


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