Why Are People Mean Toward Us?
I know I may ask for a whole world of trouble here. BUT I´ve often wondered why people are mean toward us? Often its not clear. Is it jalousy? is it a post taken out of contexts ? Or is it the angry person who are mean toward us so angry at the whole world that its projected to us?
Often its an attack on various grounds, n kept at it. Fueled as the angry person wont nor cant let go. Why is that?
Ive often been attacked n the reason was underlying jalousy. Or misunderstandings. Misunderstandings was always solved bc both parties was more in being civil that hostile.
Those that kept the mean stuff fueled has proved to be 3 catagories:
1. teenagers bc they believe no consequences for their actions, that they are bulletproof n nothing can come to harm them at all.
I say this not as i hate teenagers no i dont. I like many of them.
2. Jalous people who are blind n wont look at themselves but who blame all else for what goes wrong in their lives.
3. Those that has a chip on shoulder that makes em act like gods judges n what else higher than thou n all has to bend to their will.
The last useally i think i dont know, have a sad desolute bleak life n cant figure out how to change it, so they turn their wrath on any who the slightest rub em wrong, being it a stranger or their own kid.
i feel sad for them all. What i dont understand fully is, why they believe being mean, hurtful n cruel to any of us, n any in their victiny is gonna help or change them inside? or their lives?
In past one who was particualry evil cruel demeaning n condesending to me said she fully believed being like that toward me n all like me she would change her life. She would rise n be as successfull as Angelina Jolie. reverented as princess Diana n loved as Mother Theresa.
Needless to say her drinking got her fired n evicted from her house. She now resides on a house boat with her 20 plus cats on a not so nice smelling river, while spending most of her awake hours drinking n roaming the internet 4 chatrooms where she lies n ridicules n moves sensitive souls to the brink of suicide. Worst is, she has followers.
This ine litterary blamed me for all of her problems mainly her drinking n loosing her job. She blamed n claimed i was the culprit who had told her boss.
Mind u this dame, is a USA resident, n im a broke student in Denmark. Farthest ive been away has been Spain n Scotland. Ive never been across the pond.
another person in catagory 3, blamed me for her loosing her job. Even when she explained she had had an affair with her boss n had been to his house telling his wife of the affair while smashing his windows in n more. She couldnt see that she herself had gotten her fired in more ways than one. No i had come like thief in night n got her fired.
Ive got many more of such.
Why are some of us more chosen as means to attacks than others? Is it be we at the time are more seen than others? Or is it the popularity we have?
I know Admin does a great job, but in my years online in various chatrooms n forums i know one thing, when a fight as the ones we´ve seen here recently, the direct approach tomake em stop wont never work. Admin no get me wrong ilove the job u do, its massive n often a thankless job.
I raise this topic bc I hope by it we can find a way to help one another not to fall into the trap of mean people.
Admin i love u.
Friends, guys n gals. Join in.
If you are so keen on avoiding the trap, why do you openly walk into it?
If anyone else attacks you, don't reply. These people feed off of the reaction that you give them. If you don't feed them, they will starve.
Your challenge CWB is how to be an effective leader. You're great at standing up and taking charge and fighting for what you believe in and fighting for others. This is what makes you a target, this is why others place the blame on you for things going wrong.
Which is complete BS. A true leader, a great leader, knows that every single one of her followers has the potential to be a leader themselves. The true leader, the great leader, also knows that ultimately that is their only job; to show others how to be leaders. How to lead.
You must learn to let go CWB. You can only show people the way, it's up to them if they want to follow you. You are most certainly not, I repeat not, responsible for their actions, feelings, and behaviours. That's your greatest lesson here, learning to let go.
You must also accept that you cannot save everyone, especially those that don't want to be saved. So let go of those that have blamed you in the past; you did not fail them in any way.
You are a good leader CWB, now it's time to be a great one.
Love & light to you my friend,
I dunn CWB I think you have to just let go of these thoughts and get on channeling the energy in to your own life instead. We can waste a lot of time thinking about how we have been wrongly done by and how cruel and nasty other people are but that is their problem not ours so why waste time on it. Life is too short.
Thanx guys but its just niot just me that gets this kind of treatment. I know many here who has experienced the same, both here n elsewhere.
It s a thread to bond together n find commoness, a stronghold if u please .
Well then let it also be said that it is a very negative stronghold
No CWB it's not only you that gets treated badly, but it is you that is struggling with it. Taking it to heart for all the reasons I pointed out above.
This is not a thread to bond together or a "stronghold". Thanks, but no thanks. It's not needed. And this is not what this thread is truly about is it...
Love & light,
since i began it my dearest i only know whats its aboiut, thanx.
well i had to reply once n for all n im gonna keep silent on that thread.
me speaking out here i hope more will also stand up for themselves n say anough is enough.
PH darling, uve said it what my Charlie has said, we cant save em all. Charlie knows being a retired firefighter n all LOL
ure right , im to let it go. I had but i juss got tired of them smearing me full n get away with it. Once i said my piece i also chose i wont re reply at all.
As some other pal once said, give em rope n loads of ti, in end theyll hang emselves lol
thanx guys love u
I notice that whenever I feel unkind to someone or get gossipy and say mean things, it's usually because I'm feeling some sort of lack within myself / am not very happy. I'm finally learning that instigating fights, being gossipy, being unkind really simply reflects my darker inner self and makes ME look bad instead of the other person.
Hope that helps CWB. I know it's difficult but try to remember that when you feel attacked and let it all roll away like water off a duck's back. That honestly will make you feel better and also remember that ignoring poor behaviour is really irritating to the mean person. They like to have the power over you to get a reaction and they feed off your anger. Makes them feel powerful that they can control your emotions. You're far too good for that. Ignore the turkeys and focus on the good people in your life I say!
Take care! xx
When i get catty its bc i feel i need to stand up 4 myself. Ive proven i can b worse than they. However to me its a weakness. So im gonna do as i said on another thread, they aint worth it. N leave it at that. IF there is some come back ill forward it to admin n let em handle it. as 4 me, i wont touch it or reply bc THEY AINT EVER WORTH IT!!
angel hugs with flower petals in your favourite fragrance
Charmed Witch Bente, what I do when I get this kind of abuse is I visualize them surrounded by their angel's wings, which are flower petals with their favourite fragrance.
You stated you have let this go. If you have, then why is it still affecting you.
Have you truly asked the UNIVERSE / YOUR GUIDES /ANGELS to cleanse this emotion / abuse from you.
When I go for Qi Gong, there is one person (male) who constantly attacks verbally, (women mostly) and me. In the beginning (3yrs ago), I would react strongly to his behaviour. Now, I just visualize him surrounded by his angels' wings being flower petals. When he becomes aggressive, if need be I just respond as gently I possibly can.
loving silver wings.
I completely understand the need to stand up for oneself. I feel that anger too. I totally get your feelings CWB so i hope to clarify that I wasn't trying to insuate that I thought YOU were lacking in confidence or being catty. I know you are simply reacting and wanting to protect yourself. I meant that people who PICK fights tend to have their own demons or issues to sort out. I understand your reaction and I often react the same way......and then later wish I just stayed calm and ignored the meanies....as Julianna pretty much stated above.
I like your idea about letting admin take care of things. They watch carefully. Also, I'd keep in mind that anyone can sign up for these forums. Anyone. Some of these people who pick fights may have some emotional/mental problems ( I remember one such case here about a year ago....I think you remember too) and if you knew them in person, you'd feel sorry for them or give them plenty of space. Just another something to consider.
Well the EFF replied n keeps on ITS BS. I reported IT to admin n posted on TODAY I WANNA WACK .................. I feel better already hahahahahahaahah
N im proud i no replied ITS bs AT ALL: No i kept my promise to meself not to lower myself to ITS level. ITS SO not worth it. NOT AT ALL.
I feel great now!
As someone who has matured a bit these past few years (I'm 18... about to no longer be a teenager and am starting to have a bit more control over my emotions (I used to be explosive and bratty) but yet still young enough that I understand the immature things that oftentimes go on), I'll say that oftentimes when people search out free psychic readings, it's about something that they feel so strongly about that they cannot accept the truth if it's not what they want to hear. They have such an emotional investment in it that they BELIEVE with all their heart that it's true to the point where anyone who tells them otherwise is a liar.
Well put desringlove sweetie. Often though its not just young people but other age groups as well, n they seem never to have outgrown the "teen - highschool " years. Which is sad.
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UNbeLIEVABLE! Admin replied at last n based on the occurrences so far from n mainly they aint gonna ban or remove them.
All they will do is monitor them.
I mean what message does it send? that any given new member or old member can slander, backtalk, harress, ridicule, namecall n treat any one as bad as possible, n its a okay to do so.
Not to be downsizing the work of admin, not at all they do a GREAT job, but here im very disappointed. Im happy they will monitor them closely but i feel like all they get is a slap on hand n dont do it again.
im sad bc i dont see true justice. Right now all i see is any member is allowed to b mean to some other member n get away with it. Dont know if i wanna stay when such is allowed.
cwb considering to leave.
Hi! CWB How's you going ? Hope all is well to you now. I can really feel you and I'm always wondering why and what went wrong. I'm a straight forward person and I admit quite tough. I can really say base on my experience to much information and being nice some times makes are world up side it's easy to say we need to balance everything. But times comes and we get confused and get hurt in the end of the story. I honestly felt used for this kind of situation, yes its really painful especially people's matter to us doing this to us. I can easily trust people and I honestly don't believed in hear says of others . I always give people a chance to make a room for them to show me that they can touch our heart in good ways but eventually. We always find out no matter what we did things doesn't work out . I now sometimes find myself alone and makes myself happy though it's just a simple thing but, there are moment in time those moments pass by and I need to pinch myself. I'm a very sensitive person and I almost changing my attitude not to get affected so far things work out but I am not really much happy cos I tried my best to dig the true meaning and intention in this matter. I guess jealous is a curse. I have all the patience i can actually give my benifits of the doubt but theres always questions in between the line. The good blessings that i can see here is as long as you never hurt someones feeelings or intentional we need to stand up and be ourself till they find out and realized its their lost not our lost. People can be decieving , manipulating and I believed alll of us born with jealous but we need to turn it on positive ways. I put everything in my mind and tell to myself I'm a wonderful person , I can do better than that cos when I'm mad I tried to find kindness and always telling the truth no lies . My idea it's better to let me know the truth good or bad than hanging around with dual personality but still can't resist questioning are self bottom line everyone hs individual personality and perception and in the long or short period of time we can find out the truth and nothing but the truth. As we always said we know ourselves rather with anyone else. They says life is like a rosary full of mistery and joy though we all want peace of mind and tried to work things out leave it and let go and let's turn the book on a new page nor chapter and makes the most out of it. Mostly it's always painful but God always makes away to have a perfect timing and keep on believing thar your a wonderful person your deserve to be happy cos your amazing grace ..
i was juss so disappointed about admins ruling, but i also know from past experience that those that r mean n neg on forums like here will sooner or later show true colors n by then i know n pray admin is on the hammer so to say.
for now i trust in madama karma