Confused about a cancer male



  • Hi all,

    I was hoping for some astrological advice regarding a romantic situation. I have been in an on/off dating and sexual relationship with a cancer male since March 2011. The first few weeks were heavenly. All was running smoothly until I visited him at his home. We went for dinner and then went back to his place to watch a movie. All of a sudden he decided to suddenly predict the outcome of our relationship, suggesting that we would sleep with each other a few times and then he would pull away as that has been the nature of his experiences over the last few years. I was offended and left his place without contacting him. When I finally got in touch two days later, I think I offended him as he removed me from Facebook and Blackberry Messenger.

    I kept thinking of him and decided to randomly contact him on drunken night (happened to be a full moon in Libra). We slept together for the first time and our dating continued. A few weeks later he did a similar thing to what he did weeks into our getting to know each other. We planned to have lunch with an old friend of his who knew his long term ex girlfriend. The friend apparently let him down at the last minute and he went into a sulk. Initially he suggested me visiting him at his home or us going for a walk instead. Which I agreed to, then he called and cancelled saying he was too upset and wanted to be alone. I felt equally upset as his friend had supposedly made him feel and made a point of letting him know. He said he wanted to make it up to me by taking me away the following weekend. I declined. Then over the following week, he seemed more and more distant. Returning my texts hours or days later. I felt rejected again. Then he said he didn't want a girlfriend as he afraid of falling in love, blaming it on his past relationship. He suggested we still be friends and date. I said this was not possible for me to do as we had started having a sexual relationship.

    We stayed in touch and almost ended up in bed again. Days after he sent some picture text messages to me and suggested that we and one of my good friends girlfriends had a sexual encounter. I asked if this was a joke, he responded yes. But stupidly carried the conversation on the following day and asked via text if he fancied my mate. He said yes, I fancy you too, I'm a horny guy.I flipped and told him I didn't want anything more to do with him.

    I still think of him everyday and contacted him two days ago asking to meet next week for a chat as I am not sure whether he was out to wind me up.

    What do you guys make of this? Am I fouling myself? Is this typical cancerian behaviour?

    Im a Libra with a Virgo Moon

    He is a Cancer with either Capricorn or Aquarius Moon

    Thanks



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  • I've been a complete and utter idiot in this situation. You'll be pleased to know that should he set a date for next week (he has agreed to meet for a chat) I will most likely not attend. There's no way forward really. 😞



  • wow! doeyeyedpisces, that advice was a bit HARSH, don't you think? Let's face it, its not easy to accept that the person you like/love is responding in ways that show he/she feels anything less than you may feel about the person. Its natural for people to seek answers or rationalizations to explain these unpleasant actions rather than to face that their love is one-sided.

    Besides, I seem to recall seeing thread after endless thread by YOU inquiring about a man who seems to be demonstrating behavior that indicates that your feelings for him is not mutual as well. Even in your readings, words like "hate" were used to describe this man's feelings for you, but you still submit post after post asking about how he feels for you.

    Yet, no one has been rough with you by pointing out what, to some of us, might be painfully obvious.

    My point is, next time, try to be a bit gentler in reponding to people's posts. Love makes us all vulnerable. Let's not pour salt on the wounds by being insensitive with our comments. Just my opinion.



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  • Ive been there....we all have said and done things that we KNOW undermined our value in a relationship JUST to hold on to what we felt slipping away from our grasp. The truth is, when a person tells you who he/she is, BELIEVE IT..When someone SHOWS YOU who he/she really is, you BEST take that to the bank! LOL....the subtle things wwe learn about a person that give us pause are the "red flags" we can choose to ignore or believe along the way. Its natural to feel like you want to give someone the benefit of the doubt and hold on a little longer to see if these "signs" re-occur, but when we do that, we prolong the hurt and waste more time with the WRONG PERSON. I am learning this lesson myself, and I am having face some ugly truths about MY behavior that has enabled men to treat me a certain way.

    In terms of your situation, only YOU know if you are emotionally strong enough to see this man next week or not. Given his pattern of behavior, YOU need to decide if YOU feel he is WORTHY of your time and love. Ask yourself if he has shown you that he is capable of loving you the way you deserve to be loved. This man has SHOWN YOU who is really is....so believe him! Don't bank on his "potential", look at the man he is NOW. Ask yourself if staying in this relationship is going to give you whatever it is you are looking for...chances are you aready know the answers. Now use thise answers as the basis for your decisions where this man is concerened from here on out. YOU take your power back, and start making decisions about the role he plays in your life rather than allowing him to decide for you.



  • I wouldn't go as far as saying I'm in love with him. Just confused by his actions. There is a whole lot more to this story but I chose to summarise it in brief. He was the perfect gentlemen in most cases and completely shocked me when he suggested the manage... It was out of character and unexpected especially since we had a discussion about sexuality prior to him saying that in a text. He knew I wasn't into that sort of thing. I think he was just trying to push me away as he was scared of taking the relationship further. This is something he verbalised prior to his insensitive and shocking joke/suggestion.

    Either way, I do know the answer. Meeting and trying to resolve this will ultimately result in me having an insecurity about how he perceives my good friend. Trust issues have already been formed. So joke or not. I believe the progress of this relationship is doomed.

    Thanks for your opinions. I just want to meet my soul mate and settle.


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