Cancer Men are SIMPLE
thanks and one day he will realise what he had eventhough i do have issues when we're together i make him feel good probally doesnt want to let go becasue of the ego boost but i cant have him belittle me i've been a bit too soft which i usually aint but got weak for him
bottom line: Unevolved cancer men, play mind games and toy with your heart strings. they give fake love and act like you're the one to blame. they are very sensitive and if they only used their sensitivity for the good of the relationship they would have all the love they so often dream of having. they need to let down barriers to the ones who can truly and willingly love them and stop taking other people's advice about prospective partners, and feel with their hearts, and instead of using their ego and their competitive streak to create intimacy, they need to allow their hearts to lead them to love.
Again i see the battering of cancermen as if their sign is to blame. their sign is a MACRO part of the whole person. its the personality that makes the man NOT his sign.
Im sick n tired of woman BLAMING the sign n not the PERSONALITY. dont u know that the personality is made through raisingm, growing up, learning, teachings, customs in family, how parents r toward the child teen young person adult??? out personality is made early on as parents makes the mark on us.
who do we blame when the guy leaves the bathroom a mess, toilet seat up, soaked towels on the floor, dirty socks, yucky underwear beside the hamper??? the guy n not his mom who ougtha have taught him to clean his mess up. or how to clean ? noooo the guy gets it not his mom who neglected to do this
oh its beside the point BUT a point to the point. its ALL about PERSONALITIES NOT sunsigns.
UGH ladies wake up will ya! PLZ STOP blaming ur guy on his sign, blame his dang personailty as thats what he is n NOT his dang starsign GGEEZZZZZZ
cwb fed up
hahaha. CharmedWitchBente, you threw me for a loop, and made me giggle with your passion and truth, cause you are right, BUT, you cannot deny the connections and traits that cancer men have!!!!!!!!
As I have written on another thread:
"they lie about their feelings, they create drama when it is so unnecessary and for no reason, just to have drama and feel something, and their mother's are the reason they are so disturbed."
While reading what you wrote, it is true, my cancer guy had a lot of family issues, they didn't do right by him (the right attention, guidance, etc.,) and they mettle in his affairs as an adult. And at the time I was with him, I recognized all that you are saying, however, why is it so true that this type of upbringing happens to ALOT of cancer men and women???? Is it not a trait of their sign??
I was trying to find you on here and so I am glad that you made an appearance. I want to read more of your posts and contact you, I have many questions.
some of em do yes but dont throw all out with ya dang bathwaters ladies
CWB - your advice is so top notch. I have found that as I get older, and more wisdom comes, we have the ability to disfuse bad characteristics and bring out the good ones. Regardless of sun signs, even regardless of past histories.
I guess I can sum it up as, I am the only one in charge of my present and my destiny, the auroas and feelings I want around me are those that I take charge of, initiate and to strive for.
Just my .02cents
Well said, FINALLY one who say it as it should b said. Hheheeheheh LUV it
Thank you for starting this thread! I met a Cancerian man and fell harder, faster and deeper than I ever have believed possible and, being of a very suspicious nature, can't help but wonder how much of it is 'real', how much is fantasy, how much may be chivalry? And really, this is way too good to be true...
As if it's not hard enough, we are separated by distance -- which cannot be resolved quickly or easily as there are kids involved, mine and his..
The biggest question that still lurks in my mind, is where is that line between acceptable(?) Cancer behaviour (elegantly described as a dance) and manipulation?
Personal stories, while interesting and educational, haven't helped as much as your 'generalizations'.
Keep posting please.
Ha ha you guys really make me laugh, Ive enjoyed reading all your posts. Its hard being a Cancerian, we bash our selves up, know that we shouldnt, get confident and then the full moon appears DANG!!!! Start all over again...LOL
The Full Moon really affects me Grrrrr! (its even become a joke in my family)
Ive been in quite a few relationships & have learned something important about myself each time. Im at a stage in life now, where I can say that I truly like myself & that im a good person.
But boy its taken a hell of a long time & a lot of tears etc...
Thanks for the entertainment xxx
Cancerians pick apart conversations & tend to be negative about themselves which breeds insecurity. Ive learned to get over this finally but i still have remind myself to think positive, meditate & keep busy when im feeling a bit off. We are insatiable in our quest for love & romance & want to do all we can for our lovers, friends & families but dont take us for granted because EVENTUALLY we will walk away - forever.
MsSunshine hits a lot right on the head. Plus with a spattering of other commentary and insight, I think I've deduced a general analysis of Cancerian men for you ladies.
We're EXTREMELY soft inside. Our shall can very immensely; from retreating to our head, putting on a fake confidence/cockiness, the image/attitude we display, etc. A cancer can be very selfish, but to YOUR benefit, we're made happy by making YOU happy, so it's not always bad.
One thing to try to analyze in a Cancer is confidence, it determines everything we do. You'll see the fake confidence, which often results in retreat once we realize things aren't going right. One major problem is that due to our intuition, we're keen to tell if we'll "work" with someone, but it takes a certain level of emotional investment. If we assess to the negative, it's difficult to back out without any backlash or pain. Another major problem is we can't always control our emotional investment, sometimes we'll just shortly converse with someone, intuition kicks in and we swoon, whether we like it or not.
A Cancer is often more of a later in life catch, because we're forged through fire. Our own fire. I've degraded and belittled myself more than anyone else, and as painful as it is, came out stronger from it. I've broken down my major flaws and done everything in my power to change them. Once you've found a Cancer man who is confident in himself, you'll find something more real then you thought possible.
That isn't to say you shouldn't go after a younger Cancer, you can very well help shape him and his opinion of himself. Show constant assurance that you're in it for both of you, and set challenges and goals for him, watch how hard he works to get things done for you! This could be countered with "Oh my Cancer is lazy and doesn't show much interest". Well then, you have two possibilities (that I can immediately think of): you're not showing enough interest/challenging him or he's unsure of the relationship. If I don't have a motivation, I'll waste away at my hobbies for ages, let clutter pile up, and generally not take very good care of myself. As soon as I have something to clearly work towards, it's a whole different game. As a platonic friend has stated, I go between incredibly attractive and incredibly unattractive times.
As for the mind games... As much as they may hurt sometimes, it's because we judged it to be the least painful option (at least for the typical cancer). I've had two times in the past where a girl was infatuated with me, or we were BOTH interested, but I knew it would never work. Those women probably thought I was the damn devil, or a selfish scheming prick.
Most women are very planned and methodical about dealing with guys. Cancers pick this up like you're waving a big freaking sign over your head, and it will drive us away. The way I'd put it isn't that Cancer men are simple, it's that we're simple to deal with. As soon as you make it complicated, our sense go haywire and we often retreat. Wait for us to come back from retreat, we will as long as we care.
It may not speak for everyone, but I hope it gives some insight, and if any other cancers agree or have something to add, feel free to note it
Thanks IntuitiveCrab. Your thread was very helpful. Curious.....I know it vary for different cancers but what has been your longest retreat without contact?
It's not necessarily retreat without contact for me, but just getting away from whatever is bothering me. I'm a gamer, musician and learning enthusiast. As an example, I started learning about the Zodiac on a previous retreat, I'll lose myself writing music, hang out with friends I normally don't make time for, or even just play a game. The longest I've distanced myself... probably around a month. That was a time I was exceptionally hurt and lost.
Once again, not the case for every Cancer, but retreats are often times we seek not just to repair, but improve ourselves. As I've posted in another thread, I'm in a situation where a woman I'm crazy about started dating another guy. I'm not sure what her motiviations were, but I know part of the reason she isn't with me was my unreliability. I was unemployed, drowning in bills, but working very hard to get myself in a better place. I just wasn't there. After another encounter that lead to a retreat, I engrossed myself in finding a fast track to success, so I could prove something not just to her but to myself. I start a new career next week that will be paying for my schooling and a handsome salary. While some Cancers just block off communication, there is ALWAYS a motive to it, and while you may not understand it, we usually do. If things aren't permanently broken, we always emerge stronger than before.
Hi Scorp, Through my experiences with Scorps romantically & in friendship you have the basis of something really special with a Cancerian....Just treat him as YOU would like to be treated & take into consideration that his tough fascade is hiding a very sensititve Heart.
I to retreat from every one when I need to, my close pals etc know this about me now & dont worry so much, I just need time to escape into my own world every now & then & block outside influences etc but always emerge stronger & more focussed. I can hide away for a week or so but my Cancerian friend can hide out much longer. Your Cancerian will definitely be thinking of you during this retreat, going through all different scenarios & thinking of the past & trying to not repeat any mistakes in the future. How long have you known your Cancer man? Im sure he'd hate to be alone for too long & depending on your circumstances, would probably love to hear from you he's probably too scared to reach out to you for fear of being hurt.
IntuitiveCrab: I appreciate you sharing your personal experiences. I know all cancers don’t think alike but the insight you provide to this forum does help. Congratulations on your progress and I pray that you continue to climb the ladder of success. Your focus is now on you and that’s a good thing. I would say you learned a very valuable lesson from your previous relationship. If it is in God’s will for you guys to be together, it will be. If not, that only means He has someone better for you.
Intuitive crab, what is your birthdate and how old are you if you don't mind me asking?
I have questions for you regarding my cancer man. Would it be ok with you if I start a thread to ask you questions?