• I've seen so many relationship questions, based on either Cancers, Aries, Capricorns, Leo's ect....hey, I've been there also, but in the end love is 2 cents.

    I wanted to share this article I received this morning, it doesn't mater if your a man or a woman in the end...

    I know it help me in some ways with my own relationship and I hope that it will help you also...




    is this love?

    Filed Under (love, relationships, the one) by tinque on 03-05-2011

    Do you know love when you see it? Feel it? Are you sure?

    How do you recognize it when it comes to you? How do you really know?

    Is it possible you carry around preconceived ideas about what your “the One” should look like? Behave? Bring you? Do for you? Is it possible you might reject someone who may very well be “he” because he’s not fitting into your parameters?

    So what do you think love looks like?

    Is true love what you see at a wedding, where two people come together to declare their feelings for each other before friends and family? Because they have decided to go public with their relationship, does this indicate the real thing?

    Maybe it’s a quieter celebration, yet how do you know if this is “it”?

    How can you know the difference between what you might think is “true love” and something which you made up, a fantasy?

    So many marriages fall apart and dissolve. Knowing this, you might ask yourself if true love was ever there at all? What would have made you think so?

    Or maybe it was there in the beginning. And if it was there, why did it fade away? Did these two people then verge off on different paths, so they grew apart? Or did it die from neglect, lack of nourishment?

    This can be very confusing, causing you to doubt yourself and your feelings.

    If you’re like most women, you tend to get caught up in your imagination, your fantasies. You surely dreamed of your very own Prince Charming, your white knight in shining armor come to whisk you away to the land of milk and honey where the sun always shines and the flowers are ever blooming. These fairy tales don’t tend to disappear so readily as you grow into womanhood. The cast of characters may change; the scenery may vary, but the core of these girlish dreams often still reside within.

    So when an attractive man comes along whether it be his physicality that appeals or his sense of humor or his ability to make you feel special, do you quickly latch onto him, ignoring any red flags, convinced that you and your love will change any possible idiosyncrasies. Or maybe you just pretend they’re not there in the first place.

    You want love SO badly that when a man comes along who kind of fits your dream, do you jump all over him, wedding bells ringing loudly in your ears?

    And so you fall in with him, keeping your fantasy alive, but sooner or later, what felt like true love falters, crumbles, your little illusory bubble bursting into nothingness.

    Reality then sets in, and you jump all over yourself instead, blaming yourself, feeling humiliated, and now you feel pain, maybe shame. Again. Or maybe you blame him. You were fooled, tricked. Again.

    Was this an imaginary love? I would say yes.

    There is something else to consider here though. We can also tend to get caught up in “stuff”, such as our work, our children, our hobbies, our problems, and our partners can tend to be put on the back burner for later which doesn’t come around so often, so he and the relationship suffer as a result.

    If this has happened to you, one day you sit up and notice that your man feels more like a roommate, a friend, some distant person you once knew. Having this knowledge now, suddenly things can plunge downhill.

    With neglect, the excitement and connection WILL wither, and it could die out altogether.

    An all too common and horrible outcome is cheating, where you or your man seek comfort and maybe sex elsewhere whether it be an all out affair or a virtual one via the internet. And this can then damage your relationship so badly that saving it becomes a monumental challenge if either one of you even wants to anymore.

    If you still have feelings for your man, you might become even more unhappy; you might feel desperate, feeling more and more hopeless, and try everything you can to fix things in ways that don’t work, ways which often make you feel even worse. Things which usually involve lots of leaning forward which will translate as smothering.

    And the anxiety which arises from the awareness of the state of your relationship combined with your anxiety riddled leaning forwardness, will surely spell the death of this relationship.

    So this kind of relationship may have been real from the beginning, but it floundered due to negligence.

    How can you prevent this from happening to you?

    If you start out with what feels like true love, you are SURE it is, how can you keep it going?

    And if this love feels great now, you may wonder what if it fades for whatever reason, what can you do to bring the love back?

    When love has come to you, there is a “knowing,” a profound feeling of having “come home.” I can attest to this. I may still have had doubts. I may still have questioned my intuition, for it seemed to have led me astray before. Yet in retrospect, the feelings I had, the “knowing”, felt very different than anything I had felt before.

    But how do you know if this isn’t just your old subconscious habit of being attracted to men who are not good for you yet feel familiar and thus good? How do you know you are not being driven to the “wrong” man? How do you know it’s not your hormones clouding your judgment which can feel like intense chemistry which can feel like love instead of a deeply rooted intimate connection, true love?

    You may not know for sure at first much like I wasn’t absolutely certain. This felt like something new, but I didn’t fully trust this feeling, and maybe this was a good thing. It forced me to not so much be cautious but take my time.

    So whatever YOU are starting with, it needs time to grow. You and he need time to grow together.

    You want to know that you didn’t “create” the relationship out of neediness and desperation or out of your hopes and wishes and active romance novel centered imagination. You want to be sure that you haven’t created an illusion that will float away on you. And this takes TIME, and I don’t mean a few short months time. I mean two even three years time.

    I’m not asking you to hold back until you “know”. I am asking you to live in the moment, moment by moment. And just see and feel how it all unfolds, no forcing, just BEING yourself and BEING in the relationship.

    And as you get to know each other and grow with each other, no matter where your relationship ends up ultimately, no matter what you discover about you or him that can either bring you closer together or send you further apart, you still want to cultivate the relationship, nurture and love it.

    Regardless of whether or not he’s “the One,” you must still PRACTICE LOVE. And this includes maybe more importantly yourself. You must tend to yourself too, water yourself, nourish yourself so that YOU continue to blossom no matter what transpires.

    And then let all that love you create in yourself radiate out to him so that he too feels cared for, fed, cherished, and loved just by being with YOU.

    Relationships ARE NOT meant to be HARD. It’s not the RELATIONSHIP that requires the hard work. This is really the EASY part.

    The difficult part is working on yourself, overcoming your fears, your fears of rejection and abandonment, two of the most common ones many women hold inside. These fears can seriously interfere with the love you feel, the love you express, and the love between you and a man. You may unconsciously push him away to avoid the pain that you’re afraid is inevitable, only to be faced with the pain you were trying to avoid.

    And the biggest fear is one of being DEEPLY INTIMATE, really being VULNERABLE with your man, really getting close, down to your core close, the not so lovely bits and all.

    When you work on yourself in this way and come to love yourself deeply and profoundly just as you are, you come to love all beings, and this includes your man.

    As you quietly work on yourself, you also need to be present for your man and for your relationship. And this looks like keeping your heart as open and as soft as you can in any given moment, even when you hurt, even when you bleed, even when anger overwhelms you.

    This all applies wherever you are with your relationship.

    Even if your relationship doesn’t show itself to be the real deal, you still have YOU, whole and complete in your own love.

    True love then is what? It could mean different things to different people.

    Yet it usually starts with an attraction of some sort, a”chemistry” that cannot be defined, something that only YOU can feel. (Though if it hits you hard right away, this is something to be wary of, and you need to tread cautiously with yourself.)

    Real love is usually seen as an emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual connection which continues to grow and deepen. But this connection needs to be forged and strengthened in each and every moment, day by day through an open receptive heart, abiding respect, loving touch, and maybe words, and our willingness to LET GO and ALLOW LOVE.





  • bumpity,bump, bump

  • WOW MyJouney,

    Timely advice if I ever saw it. I was just bit*ching about my own relationship a few minutes ago and well, your right, I need to work on me and bring about my own happiness. Love those I love and let the cards fall where they may.


  • LOVE IT! And the fear of rejection and abandonment hits HARD!

    I can say I needed this after the last few days (actually years.....but ya know.....). Being broke up with a boyfriend for 13months, he is now saying he may want to see me again. I am absolutely ecstatic, but worried. I will need this on my mind.

    I think it's easy for most to look at horoscope signs because it gives an instant "insight" per-say to the outcome of the relationship.

  • 🙂

  • Hi guuurrllls

    another AWESOME TOPIC

    as i ALWAYS say when im compelled to aide those that ask i ALWAYS ALWAYS SAY:

    1. The sunsign is but a itzy tiny macrosmall part of the person u n the person u love is

    2. In end the 1 u hafta live with its the PER SO NA LI TY not the sunsign

    3. ye u can get GIST, yes only GIST, of what moves ur object of love feelings partner from astrology charts BUT its a GIST, again a MACROtiny SPECK of the whole person

    4. ANY relationship HAS TO CARED 4, each one is a DELICATE RARE EXOTIC flower. if only one attend to it it withers n dies, if non does it dies, if both attend it, it will flourish n grow. JUST bc u stand at the altar n say i do is the attention giving courting candlelit dinners NOT OVER, not is the space giving for girls n guys night out. Further JUST bc ure in a relationship u aint safe, by it i mean all the whines of we r no longer initmate, well HELLOOOOOO look down urself, if u dress in ur washed out comfy sweats ask ur self, do u wanna court n move u to happy leisure horizontal bliss? i know NO right hell yeah.

    often these ive helped n guided have brought the neg change on themselves. not to mention they demand their partner to wake up n change it for em. i say HELLOO WACK WACK WACK

    if u WANT CHANGE u get off ur ASS n change it. bc procentag is ur partner AINT no DANG mind reader. so UNLESS u VOICE it SHOW THE WAY URSELF ........................get my drift?

    lastly ive pointed this out by asking pointed into the core question. As in , do u REALLY think ure JUST ur sunsign? do u REALLY think the one u love is also JUST the sunsign?

    im almost close to not wanting to guide them or help em but WACK WACK TWACK em on the head instead. i know they come bc they need help n cant see much bc its all obscurred, BUT if they took time to THINK they get ot maybe.

    i say mayb bc when im upset n dispairing im blind as a bat as well. Yet i somehow THINK hard b4 asking. I ask when im sick of ramming my head against the wall.

    anyhews if we cant convey we want change how can we expect anyone else to?

    as i often lay out with un my reads n guidings is IT TAKES 2 TO TANGO!!!


  • Can't - get - this - off - my - mind!! Thanx Bee! lmao

  • OMGoodness!!! My mind is REALLY out of it today. What I meant to say is....

    Thanx Journey!

  • lol Aqua 🙂 Heheh

    . Yes thanks My Journey. 🙂

    Love Bee Xx

  • I totally disagree. I'm a Pisces through and through. None of that ascendant sign, moon in Uranus nonsense. What you see is what you get. I can be read like a book. I have no secrets whatsoever. None.

    And I'm fine. Just fine. Really. Thanks for asking.


  • This post is deleted!

  • I AM IN NO WAY SAYING THAT OUR SIGNS DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH OUR LIVES...oops caps, see the Lioness roarrrrrrr came out lol... but when we are aware of certain traits we can change...all i wanted to say that this article made sense to me...we have to love our selfs,own our parts of ourselves..." its the obsessing sometimes I feel with the constant sign the end what do we contribute to our relationships, relationships don't happen over night..just this Leos 2 cents... my partner now is a Sag...what can I say, i tell him he has foot in the mouth disease...

    @Marc aka PH, i love Pisces how can I not my little girl is one and my partner who passed away was one...your one, lol Gosh even our Bro Seehorse is one...

    love and light to all



    PS please do not shoot the messenger he he

  • one tuna fish roflmao

  • Take it easy mark my friend 😉

  • Speaking of the tuna fish rothflmao....hey seehorse...and you say your not psychic you heard your name being mentioned, love the frog, I'm afraid of those


    opps seen tooooo many nanny 911 hahaahahahaahah





  • My attempt at humour failed. Miserably.

    Back to the tuna-fish school of humour I go... Hey tuna-fish school, I made another funny!!!

    Okay, I'll stop now 😛

  • you teach me spiritual stuff i teach you the art of bad joking deal ? oh the frog is the card that jumped off the deck for you..... i invented a new spread "catch the card" lol

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