Leo girl pisces guy, perfection turned into nightmare
I've a story to tell about a pisces and a leo (that would be me) and any thoughts about this, to clear my mind, would be helpful and received with gratitude, it's a long story, I'll try to focus on the essential.
Once upon a time, last fall, I met a pisces through work. We had a connection instantly, but this was never spoken out loud. We lived in different countries, so after our brief encounter in my hometown where he was visiting, we became friends online. We were both going through breakups and found each others company cheerful and fun and just got along very well. I noticed I was developing feelings for him, but didn't want to say anything, until the right moment.
After four months of talking online, turned out I would be visiting his country, through work/fun, we would be attending the same event. We were both looking forward to meeting each other and hang out. And we did. Within an half an hour of meeting face to face for the first time since last fall, we both just gave in and admitted we were badly smitten, he first. It was incredibly easy and natural, we were floating. In a tipsy moment he spoke of years of happiness that he sees with me, love even.
After a weekend of fun, he asked me to spend the rest of my stay with him at his place. It was great to get out of the fun environment of the weekend into the normal world, we spent two days just strolling along, lying around, staring into each others eyes and holding hands, watching films, cuddling. It was easier and more perfect than anything I've ever experienced.We never had sex, we agreed that there would be a time for that, later. He spoke of coming to see me soon, that he wanted to earlier already, but didn't dare.
Then I came home. Two days after that he sent me an email explaining that he still has nightmares about his ex, that he is not over her and that after I've been gone he has fallen back to feeling the pain he had before. That if he hasn't ruined everything he want's to be friends and he doesn't want this to be the end. So I told him that I don't know what to do with all these sweet feelings I have for him now, to hold them or let them go. To which he replied "it might be better if you can let them go, i don't know" I feel comfortable being very honest with him, so I told him that I don't want to lose him existing as a person, that it's all too valuable to go to waste and we agreed that being in each others lives in some way is important, as friends, as before.
I don't think he was playing me when we were together, just that life is very confusing for him. But still, he said he has feelings for me, but his feelings for his ex are stronger, at least for now. That he thought it could change, but after I left it was the same as before. When we were together I once asked him if all this wonderfulness was really for real to which he said "oh god, you are the love of my life" And I believed him. I almost still do.
Now I've fallen, so badly and am at a loss, what to do? I'm stubborn, I really think this is something that might happen only once in a lifetime. My heart wont let me forget him, I want to help him move forward. Is this possible? Im so confused, so very very confused. What I would normally do if someone treated me this way, is to just say goodbye and try to heal myself. With him, I feel I can't. That I need to see this through, if there was a chance.But I have to consider the possibility that he just doesn't want me. I should believe and trust his judgement. But my heart doesn't. My heart just wants back that what we shared together.
I think he is keeping his distance now, to let me be, he is very sorry for everything. I miss talking with him so much.
Thank you for reading.
as a Pisces I am going to say that he is confused. He likes you alot, but is still loves his ex more. He doesn't want u waiting for him which is why he said ,let go of the feelings...the thing that pisses me off about Pisces ( self included) is that we have the abilty to fall in love easily and remain in love long after the party is over. Give him time, be a friend...if it is meant to be more than friends then it will be. I promise tho if he is say friends...he doesnt want to lose u... it starts there. Pray and be strong. Don't wait to long for him...there are other fish in the sea...literally. I hope this helps.
at least he spoke the truth, and told you he still had feelings for his x, he could have just used you in other ways, so he has a good quality there,,,just give him some space...
and see what happens he just might start missing you...
love and light
yes. thank you for taking the time to answer. we will see what happens, i suppose if it works itself out it does and if it doesn't i still have wonderful friend. so, i guess all is well, in a way.
Actually Leonaleona, I feel you can help him get over his ex and to move forward with you in a loving relationship. The key here is stamina, or persistence. With a very healthy dose of patience and understanding.
As a Leo you have a fiery determination to see things through. Use that strength to help him to understand and come to terms with the fact that he will always have a place in his heart for his ex. And that is fine, but there is more than enough room for someone else (namely you).
I believe his feelings for his ex are now born from compassion as opposed to say passion. And we Pisceans have compassion by the bucket-loads. And we usually blur the line between compassion and love. Gently remind him that she is his ex for a reason and that all the good qualities he sees in her can also be found in you.
You are a fire sign Leonaleona, use all of your gifts and strengths to warm him to you, as you've already done. Just be careful not to burn him. Stamina and patience. Pace yourself and you should come out the winner.
oh, you've managed to put into words what i've felt like i need to do. this will be a learning curve for me, since i tend to be so impatient and a bit black and white in my views, especially in the matters of the heart. we both know we are going to see each other again in may, work/fun again. i don't know what will happen till then, but i think after that i will be wiser in many ways. now we are not keeping in touch and i think i'm just going to wait till he sees fit to contact me.
thanks again, to all of you. it really does help to share these things.
You're not the only one learning about patience, I am too... involving a Leo girl!
But yes, your lesson here involves not only patience but learning to be a little more flexible. You Leos can tend to become quite rigid in your ways
While I do recommend you to trust your instinct, I don't feel you need to wait for him to contact you. Just be a gentle presence in his life. A quick "Hi, how was your weekend?" will suffice for now.
hi, it's me, still...
i'm wondering. we haven't spoken in over five days now. i felt like after being so completely and insanely honest with him, i'd just let him have his space and think things through, i guess we both needed to. but he isn't contacting me. am i to make of it that he has basically turned the page completely and kind of moved on. or could he be just nervous to contact me after hurting my feelings. i feel very shy to contact him, suddelnly, in case he doesn't want me to and would rather be left alone. if he just figured out he does not care or miss me in any way.... i know nobody can really know the answer to any of this, but any thoughts are welcome...
How about sending him a quick message asking how his weekend went?