• OK lady...I would really appreciate your insight on this...

    My emotions have been all over the place for the past few weeks. Sometimes I knew why - I understood where my emotions were coming from. And other times I had no idea -- I actually had my very first anxiety attack last week and have no idea why. However, since last Thursday or Friday I have felt much more calm and am no longer having the somatic symptoms. The thing is, I also am now feeling really disconnected from Spirit. Am I just being paranoid or is there something going on? I ask this because I have also been "tested" in a big way the past few weeks with chaotic and aggressive energy coming at me from external sources. Some were to be expected but others came out of nowhere.

    And now I have been contacted via email by someone I have never met asking if I would be interested in an Account Exec job at a local TV station. He isn't in town yet - arrives this Wednesday - and asked me to call him then. At first I thought this was being dropped in my lap by Spirit (especially since I kept getting messages that something would be coming TO me without my having to seek it and also that it would be computer related). But I can't help but feel that maybe this is a test as well. Either I should be recognizing this as part of my past life and moving on or I will/should pursue it, but that it will not turn out well (but something else will come out of it that is better???).

    If you have any insight I would be really grateful!



  • Dear watergirl

    I've been away for the same reasons--very energetic time--a lot of energy overloads. Yyou feel drained. Second the anxiety attack is a mixed message---crossing over to knew energy--a leap--passing through a major healing. Letting go of an energy zapper means bam suddenly we have all this power--energy and it will cause panic because for a long time this is the normal--the cap we put on our power---kept it contained so it is a bad feeling but good sign! You have healed an addiction to some form of energy zapper and now it's scary. You will be tempted at times to regress but it will be short lived as once you pass through this awareness you will know it---and want to stop it fast. So in that respect a little up and down. Also for those healing from rights of entitlement issues--deserving abundance on all levels---too much good often brings paranoid fears--that something bad will happen if you feel to good--it came from your childhood--remember the healing chant---it is safe to feel good--it is good to feel safe! I get that you just need a total "irriisponsable" take a break time--all you you you! You need alone time even if you have to play sick. I don't connect on the job offer thing--other than seeing a mask---so something is hidden but I think if you give yourself that alone time for just being free you will pick him up. I'm mostly picking up your feelings--they are strong--your thinking Is this a joke? Or worse--am I safe? Is he a crazy?. This is part of your new trust yourself in full power journey. Embrace your power. You are still a bit fearful of it. If you were not ready, Spirit would not have led you this far.BLESSINGS!


  • I have decided to just see where the job thing goes and hope and pray that my connection to my inner voice will return beforehand.

    Also, I think all the attacks coming at me are either preparing me for something to come or just a way to get me to stand up for myself again. I used to come out fighting and slay the opponent and then I think I overcorrected and allowed people to abuse me. So maybe the lesson is one of peaceful resistance - like what has been going on in the Middle East.

    The only remaining item is why I feel so disconnected from Spirit and my inner voice right now. Is it possible that life has been so difficult, chaotic and stressful for so long that I no longer trust what it feels like to be at peace???


  • OMG - I just posted my message and then your reply appeared. Same wavelength I think!!!

  • FOR YOU!

  • AND!



  • AND...

    The feelings you picked up on "is this a joke" "is he a crazy" "am I safe" could very well be connected to one, possibly two of the other issues I have going on. One is with my ex-employer. In response to a lie he told about me - in clearing it up - I felt forced to divulge some illegal things he was doing with money. I am told that he is going to react very badly and I need to "protect myself." Talk about giving someone an anxiety attack! The other is a situation with a neighbor, it was so bad that I was standing behind my front door listening to him banging on the door and ringing my doorbell like a madman and thinking "is this a joke?" "is he crazy?" "am I safe?" LITERALLY the exact words I thought! I told him I was calling the police and then he left. BUT, I am told that this situation is not over either and I should have called the police just to get it on the record for the future. The new job - I am also getting that there is hidden information. I feel like it will be a test on discernment, but I also feel that with so many people out there looking for jobs and needing a job myself that it would be irresponsible to turn one down if I get an offer...

    Thank you!


  • Oh Geez...those two cards reversed don't paint a pretty picture and I really hate that "Lost Love" card! 🙂

  • I wanted to post a picture for you of some of the spring flowers in my yard, but think I left the interface cable to my camera at my old job 😞 Sooooo, I will post the only other picture I have that is small enough to be uploaded here! It has been beautiful the past week....temps pushing 80 degrees, sunny, warm breeze....very rejuvenating and refreshing. REBIRTH!

  • NOT bad cards--by reversed meant that the blog pasted them in different order--the first one picked was the synchronicity--at the same moment you were posting to me. OK now I get my impressions--why I couldn't connect to the question because in reality the REAL issue was hidden---you do have an important situation to address. YES--you should have called the police as anyone who would come pounding on your door in heated anger has already shown you the intensity of their rage--believe it. You have no dog? A loving dog but with a big mean buisness bark and growl. Do you have a defense spray or a taser.? Avoid confrontation with this person. You need to report the incident if it happens again--get a feel for this persons fear beneath the rage so you can difuse him

    if you feel he's not responding to a place of calm call the police so you can get a restraining order. You need to calm down enough to hear spirit--to pick up exactly his isssue. Is he a hot head? Or is he mentaly unstable? You are psychic enough to know this. And the boss thing---what kind of boss is he? If he's fairly normal but also made a poor choice in hard times and broke his code of ethics--he will be more tied up in his own pain and shame and getting through it BUT if your boss is a man who has always had a character flaw--has always been criminaly minded and power ruled--you are in harms way----you need to trust your psychic knowing. Understand how important it is to rule with balance head and heart--this is no time for denial. If you truely feel not safe--then move quikly. If your just afraid of the confrontation but sense it will blow over then go with that. I'm having a hard time picking up what is true or your fears as I can feel mostly your fear. If you really want me to look deeper tell me more facts--without the emotions and I'll tell you what I pick up. Thanks for the flowers! Perfect purple!

  • Well, the ex-boss has always been a bit of a tyrant - thinks the rules do not apply to him. But to me he has always been a tyrant in a comical way. He thinks he is so smart and yet is one of the least wise people I have ever met. Inflated ego. He suffers from "short man syndrome" in my opinion -- everything he does and the way he reacts are to me overcompensation for feeling "less than" underneath it all. What he did - completely unethical and illegal, BUT in his mind he had every right to do it...the whole "the rules don't apply to me" thing. At the suggestion of the general manager who has also been a friend, I applied for unemployment. I quit, yes, but felt like I had no recourse. He had been caught by clients (stealing their money) which caused me to lose business. He also kept doing things to take money out of my pocket and the environment had become hostile. It was a commission only job so it had gotten to the point where I was working for free. On my last day - he did something that was the "final straw" for me. I gave him several opportunities to correct the situation that day and made it clear that I would be leaving if he did not. He didn't. So I left. I did not give 2 weeks notice as it would have just been two more weeks of working for free. Anyway, the unemployment benefits were denied based on his statement that I quit with no reason and with no notice (in my claim I had stated the reason of 'lack of work'). In outlining why I quit in my appeal, I had to bring up the embezzlement of money as I felt it was an important fact. I know it will not go over well with him, but honestly, isn't that his own fault? Initially, when I got the letter denying the benefits I was just going to ignore it. That's when the incident with the neighbor occurred. When I was thinking "is this a joke?" it dawned on me that Spirit was trying to wake me up to the need to defend myself. So I filed the appeal. The neighbor....he actually is related to a neighbor across the street and is only here on Sunday's and not every week. I think the child is autistic or has asperger's or something which might be why he is such a hot head. I felt like it happened just to get my attention on the other thing (with the ex-boss), but someone else told me it was not over and to protect myself. The same person told me that the ex-boss was a potential threat to me as well. So then I started wondering if I misinterpreted and should have just left the unemployment appeal thing alone. However, the anxiety attack or whatever it was occurred when I was going to ignore it and I have learned that the somatic responses occur when I am ignoring Spirit. That is why I decided to follow through. When I did, the anxiety attack went away. But then I get an angel message from MissBeth cautioning me that "something may seem like a good idea at the time may not turn out to be." All that did was cripple me because I had several things going on at the time and didn't know which situation they were talking about. So I still went ahead with the appeal. Honestly, I feel like I need to stand up and speak the truth - not only my personal truth but the truth with regard to what this man is doing to other people. Archangel Michael showed up in my angel cards this morning. I feel like I am being pushed to stick up for justice and be courageous about it. What he has been doing is just flat out WRONG. Whatever happens, happens. But I spoke the truth. Maybe it won't end well for me, but I think it needed to come out.

  • What I meant about it maybe "not ending well for me" was that I may not win the appeal. But through the process of appealing, the truth has come out.

  • I'd say you have it pretty well worked out--that's what I was looking for--YOUR insight into these people--to see if you understood them. Usually, it's a denial that bites you in the a ss but you seem to know your boss and knowing him that well it was a good choice to leave because you know that you have to except your own character compromise when you close a blind eye. I do believe you are being tested--trying out new wings in the confrontation department--flexing your power. The boss needs to be worried about you! So there is a possibility he will not stir up anymore smoke because he is hiding a real hot spot--it can go either way. I too pulled from the Michael deck for you and the DECIDE TO BE HAPPY NOW card came up. I would continue to keep him close and pray with visulization to protect you. You can picture your x boss in the distance shootoing arrows your way but they all flop at his feet as you glow wrapped in light far from him--you can see his frustration--his stomping childish feet and every fit he throws he hurts himself untill he finally throws his weapon down and walks away. Repeat to yourself you are safe in your power and you will be protected. BLESSINGS! PS--as for the neighbor--sounds like he's just unpredictable in outbursts but does not hold grudges--he's more a victim of the moment and strikes out at whomever is in the way. Keep your door locked call the police if you have to but I sense he does these things and they rarely go far--BUT Spirit could be giving you an urge to think more of protection--not to dwell on but a preparedness for it. I grew up in a big city--we call it street smarts--I don't dwell on bad things but I am cautious and use safety habits. It is the essence of Michael--big heart BIG sword. Watch your boundries--have a defense!

  • Thanks! I too think the neighbor thing was an isolated incident, but I do always keep a watchful eye out to protect myself. Part of growing up with "street smarts" and also part of being a single woman living alone all these years. I don't even open my door to someone knocking who has an official uniform on - you never know and there have been home invasions that started that way - someone posing as a police officer, cable guy, etc. Even when I actually make a call to a company and they send someone out for service - I answer the door while on the phone with a friend or family member so they will know if something goes wrong. Some might call me paranoid, but I call it street smarts! And Michael showed up again for me this morning 😉 I am still feeling more at peace than I have in a long time and am now enjoying my time off. But now I have the new job opportunity to deal with so my so my "vacation" may be over soon! I need to call him now to follow up and then I am going out to the yard to do some weeding. Have a great day....

  • Oh, and yes - the ex boss is a bit afraid of me (I have always "felt" that and the general manager has confirmed it). He's at least smart enough to know that I am smarter than he is 🙂 However, when his emotions take over - and in this case they will - who knows what he will do. He treated me so badly - basically did everything he could to push me out the door - and then was indignant when I left. He has a lot to learn and they are not going to be easy lessons as he is not open to learning them in a more gentle way...

  • So here's a new one...

    I have my first interview for a job this morning. Get up and open the garage door and someone has parked their car right smack dab in the middle of my driveway and I can't get out. I call the police dept. and they tell me to have it towed. I call several towing companies - none of them will come tow the car. Stupid reasons like, "the car has to be tagged for 24 hrs first" or "if I don't have signs posted saying not to park there we can't come get it".. Seriously? I have to have signs posted in the driveway of my own home that if you don't actualy LIVE here then you can't PARK here? Called the police back and now they are sending someone, but I have no idea if it will be in time for me to get to my interview.

    I understand I'm being tested, but I do not understand why. Frankly, it's annoying!!!!

  • And this is what I mean about feeling disconnected from Spirit...

    The police came. He said I could be nice and just have him go knock on the door, but he would prefer I have him call a tow truck because this particular family is a constant problem...lots of DUI's, domestic abuse and such. I told him he could call the tow truck. While waiting, the mother of the family came out (probably only because they saw the police here) to give some lame excuse about her daughter coming home late with a small child that was crying. What that has to do with parking in the wrong driveway is beyond me! It was obvious the way the car was parked that she was drunk. And she had a small child with her??????

    Anyway, I just pulled my three cards for the day (attached). Seriously, how do these cards go together and what do they have to do with my day (at least so far!)? Spirit has left the building!!!

    The only thing I get from these cards is that I am supposed to be more kind and accepting. Really? Of someone frazzling my morning and possibly making me late for a job interview due to their inconsiderate actions and drunkenness?

  • Sorry watergirl--we are on the same ride---and Michael is in charge. Boundries boundries boundries---AND enforcing them. Here's the kicker--no doing it for you--not even a smidge of desicion making--you must figure it out--you have the power. I've pulled the Goddess Of Creation card three times in a row! And like you scratched my head trying to find the connection to the immediate problem. As if spirit was saying forget this issue--it's not the important one! And the roots go deeper to explain this incident. First I think the situation had two purposes--one--your issue with confrontation. Don't dwell on it--deal with your boundries and let it go and expect no big drama. That's the second card---choose love----many connections out there--choose the ones that do not feed fear or steal energy. There will always be obsticles but at the same time blessings. A spirit was saying---secret gift---keeping you in the drive right now---I'm protecting you--helping you right now but you just can't see it. Last card is not what most think--it is not the meet my prince card. It completes the first card--you coming to wholeness---thinking fast--creative problem solving and being your own little army. Power--coming into your power. Your soul mate is you!--a completeness---looking up to your own higher power--your own protector and not needing that illusion outside yourself. BLESSINGS PS--Spirit says you will get all this perfectly later!

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