Dreams: Help to stop my past taking over my furture
The dreams I have each night should represent my life now.....shouldn't they. I am a very lucky lady, I have a wonderful boyfriend of 8 years, exciting plans for our future and Im just about to finish a degree at university, it really feels things could not be better.
Theres my present and future now for my past. After leaving home at 16 I got with a guy who I thought at the time could provide me with love, safety and security. For the first 12 months he was fine the next 18 months were hell. I suffered constant emotional, physical and sexual abuse and in the end had to leave him whilst he was at work. I left all my belongings but a small bag and moved from the area, that was 15 years ago.
The first few years were difficult I spent most of the time looking over my shoulder, I trusted no-one. Then I met my partner and settled down in to my new life. The problem is I have always had nightmares about my violent ex but they have got more often like every night and more violent. For the first time the other night I was sexually abused all over again whilst lying comfortabley next too my loving boyfriend of 8 years. Its driving me mad!! Me and my partner have recently started planning our wedding and children I dont know if thats just a coincidence but it feels its since then it got worst.
The stranger thing is I very very rarely think about this violent man at all conciously during the day, he just seems to control my unconcious mind. Im scared to sleep incase he makes an appearance. I have spoke to my current boyfriend but its difficult I dont want him to think I spend time thinking about exes and I think he struggles to understand although he does try.
I have thought maybe hypnotherapy will help but if anyone has any other suggestions it will be much appreciated.
Thanks for your time!
It seems like there is something left over from your past that you need to confront and deal with in order to move on and to grow. Bear in mind your ex in the dream world doesn't necessarily equate to your ex in the waking world.
What does your ex represent to you? What words/feelings/images do you associate with him?