Should I wait or move on
Need some advice on a relationship. Met a man in Feb last year, started as friends, and began dating mid April. We get along extremely well, have similar interests, talk freely about everything, trust each other and both share a strong spiritually bond. Problem is we could never take it past a certain point. He pulls back. He's has been back & forth in a toxic relationship 7 years now, twice since we started datiing, and he's has a hard time letting it go. I broke it off for a second time 3 weeks ago and I'm heartsick. He got back with his ex. We have so much good together and there is so much promise for us. But this back and forth with his ex is driving me away. He has been honest all along in that he has a hard time letting go of her completely. My head say's to let it go, but my gut says to give him time. Feel my emotions may be clouding my instincts. Any insight would be greatly appreciated. I'm in a lot of pain right now. Thanks.
MysticLight last edited by
Perhaps I can help you.
What is your DOB? What is his?
Question: Does he travel for his work?
paddifluff last edited by
YOu answer your own questions. Move on, you deserve better. He is abusing you and will continue to do so till you pull the plug. But you know this already. Good luck, be strong.
my DOB is 12/27/61, his is 7/30/63. He travels for work, mostly locally.
Thank you paddifluff.
Is there someone that can give me some insight about my situation? One important thing that I did not reveal is that the woman the man I was dating went back to is a drinker and coke addict. He as well as I neither drink or do drugs.
AstraAngel last edited by
I have been pondering your situation off and on today, and I have good news, I see the way you should go. I see what is going in in your life, and the wise course of action!
First of all, lets start with who YOU are as a person. Put your boyfriend on the back burner for a moment (we'll get back to him), and let's talk about you, your needs and what makes you tick. That will help us answer the question of what you should do, "wait or move on".
Your sun sign is in Aquarius, so you are a watery, emotion, free-flowing, romantically adventurous and VERY loving person! You are all about LOVE and RELATIONSHIP so it is no surprise to me that you are experiencing some real pain right now. Anyone who has the strong placements of Venus and Chiron (whcih we will see in a moment) in their chart as you do will be pushing the boundaries of relationships, and others may or may not want to keep up with you. That can create some discomfort with your companions at times, as you are all about entering a VERY DEEP and INTIMATE relationship with your companion of the hour. You absolutely EXPECT intimacy and closeness!
I am sensing that this present experience may be a repeating pattern in your life, or at least this situation has occurred before so you are asking yourself at times, "what the heck is wrong with me that my relationships go so far and stop?". Nothing wrong with you, not to worry, this is normal for your first phase of life. You are entering AS I WRITE THIS a beautiful NEW PHASE of your LIFE. A very DEEP understanding of yourself which you are absolutely going to FLIP over as you begin to see what I am talking about. This will iron out your relationship concerns, just wait!
Now, let's move on to your Venus. You have Venus in Pisces square with your moon. LOOK OUT... You are hungry for affection for sure! You are a very dreamy romantic individual, you have the stars in your eyes when it comes to love! That is a very beautiful part of you, it's just that in your past you didn't know where you ended and the other person began! So, you tend to look at your companion through rose-colored glasses, and there can easily be issues with them that you are not even seeing. That is your nature, to see life in idealistic ways. Handled in the right way, that is an admirable quality, however in your case it can also cause some real pain as your "ideal" of your partner fails to meet up with the reality. This is what is going on right now for you, you are struggling to hold on to your "ideal" concept of your boyfriend, in spite of him going back to the "coke addict"! One moment, you see him perfect, and you are willing to wait it out... the next you see the reality that he is with another and that is at odds with your ideal. It can be a very painful place to be in, because it is really not your boyfriend you are trying to decide what to do about, it has more to do with your IDEAL OF LOVE which is very strong in you.
JoySeeker - this is very important! Do NOT, I repeat DO NOT abandon your IDEAL concept of love that flows into another person and back into you.You have a beautiful relationship coming for you with your TRUE SOUL MATE. Hang on to your concept of relationship, and try to separate that from your boyfriend. That is the work ahead of you. It may be painful at times however you are also a very strong person and have everything it takes to let this situation work out a FANTASTIC growth opportunity in your life that will totally change your outlook in the Love Dept.
Also, because you have the moon square with your Venus, you tend to give into the other person a little too much at times. You can be easily wounded as a result. A big part of your life journey right now has to do with your North Node in Virgo, which means your standards of the other person will be held higher by you. You will not be giving in so easily to the other person, you will know who and what you are about, and as a result you will stand your ground in your relationships. It will be "Your WAY or the HIGHWAY"... in a loving way of course lol. You will be learning over the next few months more about this sticking up for yourself, and you will be proud that you learn these lessons because it will result in your RELATIONSHIPS becoming very balanced and beautiful, and that is what your Soul Mate needs, for you to be strong in yourself regardless of what they are up to.
Your Chiron (the Wounded Healer planet) is also in Pisces, tells me that you have some issues probably from your childhood related to betrayal in some way. As a result, (and this is exacerbated because your Sun sign is Aquarius), you want to FLOW with everyone, your relationships are the same way, and there can be a lack of boundaries. You have an extremely strong desire to blend and harmonize with whoever you are with. This is because you have a deep inner desire to blend in with the ALL, the UNIVERSE of LOVE. This again is a beautiful desire in you, its just that it has also caused you much pain as you have freely given yourself to others, only to be walked on. You will understand this more and more as part of your HEALING and LIFE LESSON, and will learn to more properly direct this aspect of your personality. Set clear boundaries in your relationships, and when the other person crosses the line, leave them alone and tend to your own heart, That is what you are going through right now.
Now, let's get on to the Tarot, and this will show more about where you are heading and what your WISE course of action should be with Mr. X.
Card #1 - The Queen of Wands. This is your present position in life. This tells me you are a VERY passionate person and this relationship with Mr. X has touched some real FIRE in you. You really want things to work out. This also tells me that the fire gets pretty hot in you sometimes and can burn you, there are some tears as that is how you are trying to put the fire out. I can really sense some anguish right now, YOU HANG IN THERE things are going to get a LOT better for you soon. This is a painful lesson however it is a lesson that you had to learn and Mr. X was the perfect person to help you learn it.
Card #2 - Five of Wands. This is your present expectations about X, he is really stirring up some strife in your heart, especially since YOU were able to see the fantastic potential in the relationship and you could not understand why he would want to turn away from YOUR IDEAL OF LOVE. Keep in mind though JoySeeker, that it is your IDEAL of love that you are projecting on to Mr. X, and my guess is that he is sensing your HIGH expectations of relationship, and it makes him uncomfortable, so he runs back to the Pepsi... er, I mean, the Coke addict. The Five wands is a heart wrenching card because it shows the beautiful possibility of what can be made between the two of you, if only he would play ball and melt into your IDEAL of love. However, he is a free spirit and has his own life lessons to learn, and the situation you are both in is part of that life lesson. I will be honest with you... at this point your relationship with him could go either way, it has more to do with him than you. That really doesn't matter though as we shall soon see, because of...
Card #3 - THE SUN! Wow, this is GREAT NEWS FOR YOU JOYSEEKER! This card represents "what is unexpected" and this one you did NOT see coming! For while you have been so focused on the relationship with Mr. X, you were totally unaware of the real beautiful work goin on your heart, the work of your angels, as you are entering a New Phase of life, signified by the SUN and the BABY in this card. That is what is really going on for you, you are shedding the old concepts you have had all of your life about relationship, and you are entering a very strong, mature, crystallized understanding of YOU! Because the great news is that you are ASCENDING out of all of this drama and will be finding your voice and your centerin life so that you will never ever again have to ask the question "Wait or leave him?" This relationship will be the LAST TIME you will ever ask that question because you are experiencing a total CHANGE OF PERSPECTIVE in your life. You are understanding yourself in a much more profound way, and will be finding a new way to see life so that you don't have to be bothered with these questions any more. This is indicated by
Card #4 - the Hanged Man - Now, notice this card does not mean you are going to want to hang mr X out to dry. On the contrary, wish him POSITIVE energy as you are apart, as well as his Coca Cola addicted girlfriend. WISH THEM BOTH positive energ, SEE them together having a great time buying Coke at the grocery store together, In other words, TAKE THE HIGH ROAD and see the both of them in the best possible light while you continue your ascent into the highest bliss you have ever known in your life. By viewing Mr and Ms X this way, you are RELAEASING HIM to the Universe to deal with as is best and who knows, he might wake up and come back to you... or maybe not... however that is not your concern. What IS your concern is that you see all of your life in the best possible light and understand that what you are going through is absolutely necessary for your growth or guidance and will ultimately work out for the highest possible good for ALL involved. I GUARANTEE that by embracing a positive VIEW of Mr and Ms X while you are hurting will turn your life around, and I have some really good news for you. this hanged man card tells me that as a result, you will be finding your SOUL MATE for sure! The companion you have always dreamed of is right around the corner! Now it might be Mr X, it might be someone EVEN BETTER! Your job is to stay focused on holding fast to your IDEAL of LOVE and relaesing your boyfriend to the Universe... and as a result you will be blessed with a beautiful companion who will totally understand you and will enter into you in the highest, most intimate union two people have ever had on this earth! I SEE THAT FOR YOU, because you have such a mystical understanding of love, your life would have to experience a lot of pain before you could ascend and be prepared for your TRUE SOUL MATE! Wow, I am feeling so much excitement for you right, do you feel the energy? You should, because you are destined to be so fulfilled in your life... and this is confirmed by the final card...
Card #5 - the Queen of Pentacles! THIS says it all, this is your LONG TERM future and you see how she balances out the first queen of wands. Like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, you have always had the Ruby slipper soon your feet JoySeeker, you just had to awaken to the beautiful divine lady that you truly are. You have a SOUL of GREATNESS and whatever tears you have cried in your life will be rewarded soon with your beautiful relationship that will be absolutely heavenly. You must do the work though, hold your ground, I would let Mr. X simmer on the back burner and not chase after him, and let the Universe work him over, and should he return, then you be sure to set boundaries and stick to them. You are too beautiful a lady to have to deal with this stuff, and by believing in yourself, and stay focused on your own progress, you will be in a position to make very wise choices and you may very well discover someone even better just around the corner. This Queen tells me that you will be very comfortable materially, and that the person for you will be a wonderful enhancement to your life and not a detraction.
Follow your heart, stay focused on the POSITIVE ENERGIES and your angels and the Ascended Masters who love you so much! I see so many beautiful things heading your way. Don't be afraid to cry, hug yourself as often as you need to, you will do fine. I see your heart JoySeeker and your name says it all. Keep seeking JOY and not people and you will be dancing for joy with a REAL companion before your know it.
I wish you every peace and comfort over the near future for you, let me know if there is anything more I can do. Pray often, take walks in the woods by yourself, reach out to Heaven and you will feel Heaven holding you so tightly.
I am so overwhelmed with emotion and gratitude from your reply that it'll take me a day or two to properly respond to your generous and insightful reading. You so get me! I am shocked, elated and eternally grateful for you taking the time to respond as you have. I will write back shortly.
My sun sign is Capricorn and not Aquarius. My DOB is 12/27/61. Looking back on what you posted, how does this change your perception of where I am and where I am going?