Captain! or any one else. Question of love



  • I am Andrew 20 years old and am a college student-my birthday is 12/18/1990. I have chosen to not date anyone at this point because I am very picky and believe I should spend my time with someone I feel a connection with. Ever since one day I saw this one random girl who I have never seen before, for some reason I was extremely attracted and drawn to her. She seemed to be a mixture of everything I wanted in a girl but it was not solely based on looks and could feel some type of connection. When I started one of my classes she randomly sat in front of me. After finally talking to her one time, I tried to contact her on a social network and it didn't work out as, but I still had her on my mind for some reason. While meeting other girls I still could not forget her but a long time went by. Months later, she shows up at a random college party, and even she said she didn't remember me, but we instantly clicked and talked for a while. We were both a little intoxicated and I never got any type of contact with her again. Now I recently am taking a winterim class not in the same city, and out of 13 people she walks in the class and is attending it. I talked to her once again and am trying to make this work. Is this a sign? Captain I could use your help as you helped me before. I know I am young and am not looking to go in a deep relationship or marraige or anything like that, but is there something more than coincidence to her showing up everywhere and should I pursue her? advice would be greatly appreciated. Her name is Stephanie Arthur



  • Yes indeedy, your profile shows you search for excellence and ecstatic experiences on your life's journey, Andrew. But let me ask you this - would you be willing to wait and not date anyone else if I told you it would be twenty years before you met Ms. Right? I'm not saying that will happen but by waiting, you miss out on the chance to improve your interpersonal and relating skills with other people. Or are you really just trying to protect yourself from being hurt? You can have some pretty unrealistic expectations about your perfect match so mixing with normal humans might help you to realise that.

    Every relationship doesn't have to be 'the one'. I know you have little stomach for slights and disappointments but you will be a very lonely guy if you wait too long for the right partner to turn up. Why not just have some fun with the people around you right now? Even if this girl (or someone else) doesn't turn out to be your perfect match, you can still enjoy each other's company. So next time you see her, ask her out for coffee. If she turns you down, then you know she's not meant to be in your life. But the next girl might be.

    Just don't take life and relationships so seriously that you forget to have any fun.



  • Thanks a lot Captain. I never thought about it in that way. I'll take what you said and try my best to follow it. I really appreciate it, good luck and happy new year



  • Same to you! 🙂