Calling Kushikamikiba Are U there?
Hi Kush! Happy New Year! Hope you are WELL!
Remember the reading you did for me where you said
"what's yours is yours & it is gonna be GOOD" ???
Well it WAS. SO good! An AMAZING online connection with a soul mate in another country where we courted like I'd never been courted before & we made plans to actually move from virtual relationship to physical togetherness--once both of us fulfilled life/work commitments that would take some months.
he got me like no one ever did before!
Neither one of us had ever had a virtual relationship before...nor had we had a "real world' relationship with anyone nearly as compatible!
He pursued me online via messages & chat & gifts of music & art & poetry like no one else ever gave me--he asked me for for commitment & I gave it...
then his online world grew--other online women got between while I was physically relocating & busy as heck going thru some Hades...he began to mistrust me & now has cut off communication!
can you get anything on this? Is he STILL MINE???
I'm hoping this relationship was not a temporary thing that has "run it's course" but this is just a temporary lesson & work both of us must do on our own before we find our way to the marriage we've discussed & our travelling & living together "in real life"
my b-day is June 24 1955 and his is Sept 12 (not sure of year--I think--1960)
I am in California--he is in northern Columbia S America
I appreciate any clarification you can give me on this--will we be together?
If so...WHEN? Is there anything I need to do?
If not this one--Kush--I 've been alone too long--
I am SO ready to LOVE & BE LOVED--and actually MARRY...
WHEN is my husband (who I know already exists in this world!) coming for me???
When will I be with the one who is meant to LOVE ME & BE LOVED by me, be my LOVER, my PARTNER, my HUSBAND, my BEST FRIEND & my TRAVELLING COMPANION THRU LIFE?
Thanks darlin'--I am grateful!
Hey hey, listen i'm kinda tied up at the moment and i cant reply to this so soon but i'll get back to ya asap, before the weekend
ok here we go
I'm assuming he wasnt totally honest with you while talking online, he might have downplayed or exaggerated certain things about himself that you might not realize. Right now the relationship is in trouble and its certainly because you were busy with matters you could not control. Had he really wanted to marry you i suppose he could have waited or something. There is a lot of imbalance here and also a hell of a lot of foreign ground (no pun intended) to cover. You will start over but i advise you to think carefully about the marriage part although it looks like that balance will be restored in time. As for the when, that might be an issue. If you both have jobs and you both live so far apart then any one of you heading there might take a long time. I told you to think carefully of marriage because of this factor. You might not end up meeting after a very long time and other men will come and go into your life.
Hi my sweet KushikamiKiba
Thanks for getting back to me & pretty darn quick too! I'm not sure if your explanation is unclear to me because you were rushed (due to you being tied up) &
you wanted to get back to me in good time or because the situation itself is not too clear...
I'm more than a bit confused from your response--can you please clarify a few things?
Please take your time-- of course before the weekend would be great but really--I'd rather wait a bit. This one really MATTERS! I have plenty of other stuff going on taking my immediate attention!
This relationship has long felt like a lifetime thing--like he's the man I can spend the rest of my life with--which is so RARE for me--I have never felt this way before!
He's by far not the first man who brought up marriage with me-- but he IS the very first who I did not cringe with when he brought it up! It felt GOOD--right! So for such important lifetime potential...I can wait a bit for clear answers..take your time.
At the moment--I get that something has really come between us--maybe another woman?
even if it is not another woman who took his actual love--another women with an agenda who played on his fears enough to make him mistrust me so intensely?
Maybe it is just his own fears about being seriously involved, misled, & hurt?
are you getting anything on this?
My own sense is it's partially his own fears of letting himself love & believe that I am real, partially his fear of ME & how very real & how good it could be,
& some-- his past experiences with not so much women--but A woman who hurt him long long ago...
if he has become involved with someone where he physically is now--
all I know is he is very clear she may be physically there but she is NOT me...
she is nothing like me, he wishes she was more like me and that he knows it won't last!
You said "I assume..." of course it's possible that he's downplayed or exaggerated--
I wonder: are you getting this from a reading? or are you conjecturing?
If a reading--I'm very curious--what are you reading this from--cards? runes?
which cards or runes are telling you this?
You should know: neither of us are youngsters--he's 50-ish, I'm 55.
He said he's not had a serious relationship with a woman who loved him for "a long time" and never been married.
I DO get our relationship is in serious trouble--and partially because I got very intensely busy with matters beyond my control.
A project that was "his baby" for many years is now on the tail end--with a group who's never worked together before come together to make the decisions as to how 5 years of HIS life's work will be presented to the world. So I get he feels like he is not in control & his being reactive may be his freaking out over that.
I am taking control of my own life back--but like everyone else--I'm finding things are taking their own sweet time...longer than I'd like...but I AM taking care of life step by step.
You say "Had he really wanted to marry you I suppose he could have waited or something..."
Can you clarify what you mean by that? Are we in trouble because he has taken up with someone in his physical locale?
I must tell you Kush--while I'm enough of a big girl to have been ready to hear you say--it's run it's course--I'm VERY glad you see that we'll start over & that balance will be restored in time.
He's one of the few men who sees past the "public persona" of me to the very private one & more-- to an intimate ,e that very few have found their way to at all!
He genuinely knows about many many things I'm interested & educated in--the kind of stuff you just can't fake knowing or being into!
Very unusual for both of us to meet someone who has this MANY of our broad eclectic interests in common--and knows them in such depth. From art to poetry to music to history to spiritual stuff....we have discussed that it is as if we were born for one another...
Per work--neither of us have traditional "jobs"--we both do the kinds of work we can do from many places--
We have discussed both wanting to travel & live in other countries--our interests & the countries we have individually considered are very very similar...We are both at the tail ends of things that took about 5 years of our lives--and are just wrapping those up!
However long these things take on both our sides--neither of us will be free to find one another til then...but a season or two is what I think it will be for each of us!
I've long planned to leave the USA to live elsewhere--for me it's always been probably somewhere in Latin America, maybe Spain...He loves his own country--but knows he probably will leave there too...it appears like other Latin American countries or Spain are where he has made connections!
I've been working on creating an online business and have long planned to be able to work it from anywhere. My goal has been that independence so I can be free to travel!
Is the reason you tell me to think carefully about marriage solely because of how far apart we live? Or is there another reason?
Do you see that other men WILL come into my life?
It's interesting you say that in the plural--not other 'man" but "men..."
I am wondering if he will need to "win me back" from some other man...
I appreciate anything you can tell me to help me know how to proceed:
better to just let it alone & hope he will reconnect with me?
or should I take the lead & e-mail him? Any advice?
you were so right on in your reading last year about how GOOD this would be--& I remember how interestingly you put it--that what was mine was really mine...
I'm hoping you can help me get real clarity on it! GRATITUDE!
LOVE & LIGHT & take things slow & easy for yourself
When i said i assume its because the cards didnt give me a clear perspective so i'd make an assumption as to what they would say.
One thing is that I can NEVER handle giving bad news.
The short version of the story is this
He thought you not being around was a bad sign and so he began looking again for options, this puts his own emotions in a very suspicious position and that is why i'm asking you (not as a reader but as a friend) to take the wedding plans slow.
I tend to use the plural to any person because from my own experience one will never stop being tested.
He might very well need to win you back if such a thing happens.
Just to be sure i've cast the runes on the same issue
Out of the 5 runes in the central aspect of your situation two "moving" runes came out while a third is slightly out of the group and nearer to one of "protection"
This supports my earlier statement that others will come and go because you yourself are still moving despite having him in your life. The other 3 runes in the center are those of "birth" "wealth" and "storm" Which shows rough times ahead but the birth of something bright in the future, this is supported by the "sun" rune just outside the group and the "strength" rune (reversed) just on the opposite side.
Gee Wiz I DO LOVE you Kush...what a gem you are! I continue to be impressed that you are so wise so young. I DO know what challenges that can bring--takes one to know one!!
LOVE how you describe WHY you said "assume" & I totally get that. Also get the "not being able to handle giving bad news"--that was always hard for me too--still is not much easier in my 50's though I'm better at it than I was...can stay more neutral...
I think the reason that he shocked me with a virtual engagement ring that he posted on my wall for all my friends to see just when I moved from the country 50 miles north of LA back into LA was he thought I might meet someone before we could find our way to being physically together.
He actually brought that up for discussion in the month or two before I moved back.
I've been a dancer/artist/performer & major babe with many men chasing my butt all my life so both used to being chased & used to fending off men...
I don't think that being "desire-able" gives me value as a woman. I KNOW what gives me value as a woman...my heart-mind-spirit self !!! The packaging? That's a bonus...
HE was a philosophical/metaphysically-oriented poet who became an archeologist...not exactly the rock star used to being chased by women...I think I have much more experience in relationships than he does...
I LOVE that you are asking me to take wedding plans slow "as a friend not as a reader"--I cherish that & honor & cherish & am grateful for your friendship!
As a friend I will tell you: I DO LOVE him--yet I am very aware:
marriage for us MIGHT work & really be what both of us never dreamed we'd find--that "really good what's mine is mine" that you saw last summer...
but this is a virtual thing so far--so unless & until we make it to be physically together for REAL--MARRIAGE IS a wonderful POSSIBLITY
yet I am making no real hard plans!
IF we make it to be physically together--THEN we will see what we have!
In the meantime--I must see myself as a free woman...
So Kushikamikiba dear FRIEND--know I DO have my own head on straight about this!
You are SO right too that I am still moving despite having him in my life!
Glad to know there's a 3rd rune nearer to one of protection--I NEED protection from SOMEWHERE other than just me! Since my Mom passed I literally am an orphan with NO blood family--so I DO look forward to finding my husband to BE my family!
I never really wanted to marry before the last couple of years--not sure if this is part of the destiny or testing that I sense you too will experience in your life...I guess I always knew I would not find my MATE til much later in life--at 55 I think now is a good time!
You probably intuitively do know already--when we are given our gifts young--there's SO much we must live thru & experience on our own...
This man has been a big surprise to me--I never had a pen-pal or virtual relationship before--
but 3 seasons of sharing & caring more deeply than I have been able to with another--
and SO many different things we share that we are both passionate about--
I had not even seen a photo of him when I realized that he could be a dwarf & it wouldn't matter--I had fallen for his spirit, his heart & his mind! Right about the time I was getting ready to write him that--he popped on chat, told me how tall, what he looked like, & sent me his pic!
It's kind of been like that--this psychic connection.
Hmmm...Birth..wealth..storm...I'm IN the storm right now--about to have birth of my new life--and perhaps that's why I needed to disconnect some from him too...this is something I need to come out & do on my own...at last I am coming out online to tell my story--which is hard for me--it's so personal & I must give up privacy--which as a Cancer--is HUGE to me...
People see me as looking & doing GREAT--like the world is my oyster--
my GF says it's cos of the aristocratic blood that makes me look like a rich chick & I carry myself that way...but I am SO broke I am selling clothing & whatever jewelry & anything I can just to survive--YET...
I'm also expecting the WEALTH that has been foretold for such a long time to start coming in SOON!
So I am grateful you shared that Birth Wealth & Storm with me...AND that its' supported by SUN & STRENGTH...
Interesting that the Sun is just outside the group--
my (at the moment out of touch & absent) love interest has used a spanish language metaphor referring to himself as the sun more than a few times.
So I guess I just have to be patient & see how life unfolds...THANK YOU dear-heart! For the clarification & the friendship:-)
I'll keep you posted! LOVE & LIGHT!