As a Pisces i can get confused with my emotions and do something as a result of someone elses emotions or intentions, and finding the difference between reality and dreams is confusing too. can anyone help with any suggestions thank you.
This confusion causes me to get into arguments feel intence emotions im not sure are mine and waste time.
Im a cofused fish
Are there certain people around you that exacerbate the situation. Take time to really assess the friends and aquaintances you have. Is there anyone you feel emotionally drained from by just being in their company. If you identify any one in particular just try and spend less time in their company and see if there is any difference in you.
Meditation and relaxation excercises help. They strengthen your aura and alow you to start fending off other peoples auras. Also it can give you time to comtemplate what is happening to you and allow time to allow your own thoughts and feeling on a subject to percolate through.
One other thing is learn to say no, have some time to you and start developing interests and pursuits that you genuinely enjoy doing and are not just doing to please someone else.
You do not indicate your age but I had a terrible angst ridden time going through my leter teenage years as reality did not really exist for me. Sex and Women just totally overpowered me and left me unable to communicate effectively at all.
I am now 38 and confident but even now if a meet I am a total chameleon and my personality is fluid. Even if I pick up a pen someone else has used I will right in the style of that person until I have used it enough to imprint my pesonality on it.
WOW Thanx PicsesPiggy That is some real good sound advice that im going to do for sure Im 17 and male, my Birthday is Feb 27 1992 that makes me a Pisces sun and mercury, Capricorn moon, Gemini Rissing sign. Im also a tripple capricorn and triple aquarious and others too.
What you said about your teenage years is similar to what im experiencing these days LOL. I have many interests that i know are my own some may be to please others but i still enjoy them.
I have before but i've always been afraid to just relax maybe because i start to feel different and im so used to that on edge sensetive charmelion feeling. i havent done any meditation before but ill give both of them a try so i can stengthen my aura and be myself.
My mother and i argue alot prabably because im confused about my emotions and this is very emotionaly draining and i do think she exacerbateds what i say to her during arguments (my mums a virgo not sure if thats significant in anyway) but she's gone away for 2 and a half weeks so ill have all the time in the world away from her.
Reality can hardly exist for me now too but i try my best to cling to it. I used to have a pen i imprinted my personality in to but i might have let someone else use it or at least i stopped using it. Thank You so much, finaly i have some advice i can follow that i recon will work. Great
Good luck, things do get better and being pisces you have such a vivid imagination and once you find the right person to share that with the sky is the limit.
My Drama teacher at school gave me my first ever meditation lesson; at the end of the class we all had to sit with our backs straight in chairs, close our eyes and picture a rainbow waterfall in our heads. Slowly watch the rainbow flow down your neck, across your shoulders relaxing the muscles as it goes, some of it flows down your arms and our your fingers tips, rest goes down your torso and pools by your diaphragm, building into a bright white light, this light then radiates thoughout your whole body and relaxing you fully. Keep this up for 5 minutes
I wish you inner peace and calm
Pisces friends and allies!!!!
As Mother to a truly extraordinary Pisces girl, age 15, my feeling is that the external world is confusing these daze. So being the psychic-ultra tuned in peeps u r,well it makes sense u feel confused!!! My pie-pie girl is recovering from Anotexia Nervosa, and she is so strong willed! I'm really impressed by her no bullshit approach. But oh WOW, she's a true dreamy person, an artist in all mediums-a confusing sometimes, but so beautiful allways it's forever exciting!
I love u Pisces... Be your wonderfully different selves!!!! ( please?)
Lisa Scorpio Momma
Hello PiscesPiggy what you said has realy helped by making things much more easy to understand and work so thank you.
So glad to hear it, sometimes you just need to step back and take a look at your life as if through someone else's eyes.
Wish you well
Being a fish is hard work. LOL So many emotions, so many people influencing you. It is difficult to know which direction to swim in, especially when you agree with everyone.
But along with being hard work, it is also pretty amazing. The ability to tune in with other people helps endear them to you, but also allows for that connection that I think us fish feed on. You can celebrate the joys and triumphs of others as if they were your own. It is quite an amazing feeling, but one that you can easily become lost in.
My suggestion to you would be to protect yourself. As a very sensitive person (pisces sun, cancer moon, scorpio rising), the best gift I have given myself is developing a filtering system. Meditation is certainly a wonderful outlet. I know others who use art, music, writing, drawing...anything creative. Your cappy moon may enjoy some structure, so create a routine, especially for when you are feeling extremely overwhelmed. You must have an outlet, as well as take time for yourself. Silence and solidarity are essential. I have worked in an ER for many years, and the one thing I do when I come home is lock myself in the bathroom--take a long bath, candles, etc...just in an attempt to decompress and wash away the emotions of the day. It's not to say that you cannot be affected by them or learn from them or even enjoy them. You just have to be able to seperate them from yourself so that they do not become so much a part of you that you feel bogged down.
Your virgo mother is your guide, and you are her's. You both possess so many of the same qualities, but they come from different places. The perspectives are different, but essentially you are walking the same path. Keep that in mind. Your sensitivity and her logical mind can find comfort in each other. She is trying to protect you and you are teaching her to feel more with her heart.. Good luck to you!
Find stillness. it is everywhere even in the midst of chaos. stillness is quiet mind.
stopping even for a moment the endless stream of self talk can allow greater understanding to come. you can not "think" who you are, this causes the confusion.
Since you're a Pisces male, and I am trying to figure out how to deal with one, I'd like to ask you a couple of questions.
Briefly: He and I were hs bf and gf. First loves. 25 years later, we meet up Facebook. He is on his second marriage, extremely unhappy. We started talking, which led to serious flirting (which he started, btw), which led to massive confusion, more on his part than mine. But his confusion is making me confused.
At this point, beyond my own confusion, I don't know how to help him or how to respond to his moods. My view of the situation is that his wife is manipulating him in the extreme--and that's just not my cattiness or my being selfish. Remember, we grew up a couple of blocks from each other. I know him, and I care about him--beyond my own needs.
I have largely refrained from giving my own view of the situation. I simply try to listen when he talks, which is becoming less frequent. So, that is my first question. Should I say what I think? Give him another viewpoint? Or just let him come to it on his own, if he will?
Second, big question is how to deal with him when he withdraws. Leave him alone? Just try to act my normal chatty silly self? I really don't know what he needs from me during these periods.
I appreciate any insight you can give. Thanks!
Hi Genuine Sag,
First: you have to ask yourself what are you gaining from this situation with him? What are you hoping to acheive?
If he is so confusing/withdrawn/inconsitent with his feelings then why are you continuing trying to make a connection with him all on your own? hard work for you. What does he bring to your life?
Second, if you give your opinion, it is only your opinion. But more important, ask yourself why you would want to give your opinion on his marriage?
By asking these questions to yourself, you will understand your feelings towards him and start being honest to yourself.
If it is him you want and he is married (regardless of whether he is manipulated or unhappy or started the flirting) he is married and until or if ever that situation changes you should stay away and not become a 3rd party or reason for an unhappy man to make his own decisions in his life. It has to come from him, or he has to stay with his choices and complain about them.
You didnt cause the confusion in him by making contact again. he sounds like he was confused anyway and you were the catalyst. Find someone who is free and not confused and leave the past where it is until HE is 100% sure that he wants the past to become his future.
I know that i have been direct with you BUT i have been in a similar situation myself and after 2 years of being messed around, pursued and then put on hold by a soul love...i have been confused out of my head by what i now realise was a confused man anyway who doesn't know what he wants and will not at this stage of his life regardless of whether i am in the background or in the main frame! But, it actually had nothing to do with me, him really. I finally started asking myself what part did i play in this game, and why?? Find your real motives for staying in it. if you genuinely love him then let him go to work it out and he will return. Real love makes two people find eachother again whatever the circumstances. If you are just flattered by the attention and admiration of a lover of days gone by then find out whats missing in your life that this man's fleeting attention is filling?
Hard questions to yourself, honest answers about yourself. I've had to do it but it will set you free and in turn set him free to come back together once more properly and permanently or both move on.
It is hard to let go of our "loves" and our soulmates as we are truly connected and the bond is so strong but remember it is just a chapter in the long journey of our lives sometimes returned to to get closure or understand yourself better and grow.
I wish you well my friend. I'm a Pisces (24.02.1965) with Sag moon, Libra rising...and my path to love has been hard but i have grown loads by understanding my own heart through painful and heartbreaking lessons.
You sound very compasionate, loyal and understanding but direct that on yourself first and your wants and needs not any man who is not able to value it yet. Stop trying to second guess his actions, words, emotions...and second guess your own.
I hear what you're saying. I really do. Please don't think I haven't tried to put a stop to it. And you are spot-on in some ways: There are issues in my own life. I haven't been in a relationship in a long time; I struggle with chronic illness; I am disabled. My own vulnerabilities make it harder than it might normally be to walk away from this.
It is flattering and started out fun, and it is getting less fun and more messed-up. I've said more than once to him that we should wait to see one another until he is free, etc. I did it again last week. If you knew me, you'd know this situation is very uncharacteristic of me. At 44 years old, I've never been involved with a married man. Never even tempted: Who needs it? And being involved in someone else's marriage gives me the heebie-jeebies.
But when I said again last week that I wanted to forget it for now, I got back a long email in which he detailed what he is feeling, which is primarily confusion, though his description sounded to me a lot like depression and included the phrase "but don't worry, I'm not suicidal."
He may be manipulating me, but the fact remains that I have dealt with suicidal people before, and I am concerned. There are times when I think slamming the door on someone is the only right answer; with him, right now, I honestly don't think that is the right approach. He is in a really bad place, in all kinds of ways, his job; his ex-wife and son, too. And he owns guns, which scares the sh*t out of me. Not to inflate my own importance, but I worry that if I did really shut him out of my life at this moment, it might be just the thing that would tip him over the edge.
If you want to know the truth--and I cannot believe I am sharing this in a public forum, with people I don't know!--I found out a lot about what happened when we broke up all those years ago when we recently reconnected, and it turns out that he was being punished for being with me. He told me, for instance, that a black eye that I remembered--and that he told me then he had got in a fight with his brother--was actually the result of his father beating the crap out of him after his dad drove by my house and saw him there.
I didn't know then. I knew his parents were jerks, but I didn't know he was being hit, I didn't know he was suffering to be with me. And I did nothing to help. In fact, I perceived his distance as being about me, and I was a self-centered jerk and broke up with him. This time, he's letting me know he's suffering. Between the guilt over my failure to help the first time, and the still-loving him, I feel about as stuck as I've ever felt.
I believe that people have to make their own decisions and be responsible for their own choices. But I've also been in crisis, as he is now, and there have been people who helped me through that. I know what a difference it can make. And he is a very private person; he isn't going to talk to just anyone. I simply don't feel able to say: Go talk to somebody else. He absolutely has that exquisite Pisces sensitivity, and I cannot imagine how much that would hurt him.
There's a limit to how long I can deny my own needs, and if it turns out that this is just manipulation, I will figure that out eventually. But for the moment, I have to believe him when he says he needs me in his life, and try to help him as best I can.
Thanks for letting me talk.
Hi Fishmagnetism (and anyone else)--
I know you've probably lost interest in my little drama, and I don't blame you. But I wanted to let you know that your words have been working on me today. And I had a total lightbulb moment this afternoon, when I realized that a bf I lived with for 4 years was also Pisces, and considered the cirumstances of that relationship, especially the ending.
I won't bore you with details, but suffice it to say that there is a real similarity b/t the role I played in that relationship, and the role the wife is playing in this one. I think that accounts for my sense that I "know" what she is doing. Add to that the guilt I feel over what I did to my bf when I played that role, along with the guilt I feel over Married Man's situation when we were in h.s. .... You see what I'm saying? There's some weird mirroring going on here. Beyond that, I think my Sag sense of injustice has gotten engaged. He is being hurt, and watching it is very difficult.
But this insight has helped me enormously. It's clear to me now that the drama is between those two, that there's no way for me to really help him. It's helped me to detach, to see his reaching out to me more as desperation than genuine interest, and to realize that he will be a long time recovering from this, if he ever separates from her at all.
The goal now is try to stay a supportive friend, and if I cannot, if my own emotions get engaged, I'll just have to tell him I cannot play that role either. Honestly, this just happened today, so I don't know how I'll feel in a few days or whatever, but the recognition of him as being in this position has freaked me out a little bit. It made me remember the sense of responsibility I always had for him, when we were involved and even afterward, and for second bf too. Both these guys got too heavy, eventually, and overwhelmed and exhausted me.
Maybe my past is past for a good reason, iow. I hope I can come to FEEL that as strongly as I believe it, at the moment. That still doesn't explain WHY I am apparently attracted to these types, though I haven't dated a Pisces since. Anyway, that's a question for another day. I just wanted to thank you for posting, and for giving me a place and a way to sort this out a little bit. Life is just hard sometimes, isn't it?
Your story mirrors min to a point, I fell in love with my Sag when I was 17 and October last year I found myself at a crossroads in life and my Sag and I reconnected. Pisces see potential in everyone and hate to give up on a dream. In my case it took a birth, death, marriage and my Sag's break up of a previous relationship to actually do something about the unhappy situation I had found myself for the last 6 years of a 14 year relationship with a Taurean lady.
We can be useless at actually making a decision unless we wake up to reality.
If this has not happened with your pisces then he is still immersed in a dream and being a friend is all you can ask.
Find out what his rising sign is, mine is sagitarius and it means I like my space as well so I do't get too suffocating for a sag.
Pisces men are the easiest sign to fall in love with as we reflect what you want from us and not neccesarily what we want. However if you are what we want we will stop at nothing to get what we want. There is nothing we will not do to make sure you are the princess in the fairy tale.
Hi Genuine Sag, no, i haven't got bored with your drama, not atall. You really are a genuine sag and i admire your honesty to reveal all about your situation. I too am 44, and our situations are identical (mine was an Aries man, who is living with another woman and miserable, controlled, trapped - i even went to see her to find the truth! - he hid it from me when we met). I suppose that is why i can relate to you, and write to you as i do. I am as much helping myself as i am you! I too dont do "married men", trapped men (altho they are usually trapped of their own making, they feel confortable like that!) or even anyone else boyfriend, its not my style and i have too much self worth to share anyone. I would never had got involved if i had known the situation. But, these types bring out our rescuing qualities and the bond and the knowing can be incredible because we have faced similar before in our own situations with past loves. We can truly be connected to them and its a very genuine real love on both sides.
Our logic and our maturity makes us break away and end it a thousand times, knowing we our wasting our lives on a love who is not ready to stand up for what he feels, and may never. Though i dont doubt your Pisces genuinely wants to be with you, he may not have the tools to get him to that place, and that is one thing you (and i) have to accept. We cannot do the work for them. We are all a different stages in our soul development, and lessons you have learnt he has yet to go through. You must work through the guilt of ending the relationship and worrying what he will do to himself. You are not responsible for his emotional state, altho it may appear so. You are only responsible for yours. He has probably opened up to you more than he any other woman and that places a tremendous amount of responsibility on your shoulders to "fix" him, help him, love him, pay him back for the suffering he has been through to see you. He hasnt done anything in true manipulation, he is probably unware consciously of how this sharing has weighed heavy on your heart and the worry you feel. He is too wrapped up in his own despair to see clearly how he affects you. No Pisces truly wants to hurt anyone, it is not our nature. Pisces do not play with other peoples feelings, as we do not like our feelings played with...it hurts deeply, we feel everything. He is just reaching out, trying to make sense of his life and he trusts you, unfortunately tho, he is looking for a rescuer, someone to make it all better. Yet he is the only one that holds the key to set himself free. Detach as best you can, your heart will catch up with your head, and in moments of pain and longing to connect to him and be there, pass the care of him over to a higher place (God, if you believe in that..) Ask that he finds peace and a resolution to his life, and you do too. Ask that he is taken care of, given strength and clarity to go forward in his life. It really is out of your hands, you have loved him as best you can, its up to him to realise that or not. Do not give anymore of your beautiful energy, spirit, wisdom and love until you are sure he can give the same back tenfold! Right now he is no good to anyone and you would kill yourself and break your soul trying to bring him to a place you have reached already, when he is not ready. As for friends?...thats a hard one. We want to be in the background, there for them....but really we are still waiting, hanging on for them to claim us. Have no expectations, set yourself free, deal with your own pain of loss and seperation from him. Send him love and wish him well in your heart. Grow from your experience with him and put it to use in your own life, you have finally set boundaries for yourself and for your heart. if this love ever has a chance of ever coming full circle and returning to both of you it will come from a healthy place, not from a place of despair or guilt on either of your parts.
You have drawn this situation again, as you say a mirror, to learn from it finally, you have if you let it go. Forgive yourself for any wrong and pain you caused past lovers, or you have caused yourself.
I hope this helps, your strength is in your ability to love so completely and fully. You are not a fool for getting involved again, you are real, you went with your heart......the romantic lives in all of us and we all hope for that true lasting love...its the stuff that all the great novels, poems and movies were based on!
But, we must be able to see when a relationship or association is stuck, and we can do no more to move it forward - that is the time to let go and pass the care of it over. Have faith and trust that what is right for you will come into your life and fulfill you in every way possible!
Sending you loads of positive vibes, strength and peace. You are very real and honest, be proud of who you are and celebrate you big caring heart...the world needs more of people like you! Go out there and SHINE again!!
Best wishes x
oh, and by the way: Life is hard?....you can say that again!! But it is also beautiful and full of surprises if we stop taking ourselves so seriously....my god, pair of soppy old souls we are!!
Have a fab day x
Hi FishMagnetism and Pisces Piggy--
I'm sorry to have taken so long to respond. I actually came back and read both your comments more than once. I was just overwhelmed and exhausted, and every time I tried to respond I found myself crying. And out of words.
I spent a lot of time over the past few days reading, researching, writing, thinking. I looked at his chart again--Cancer rising. I didn't know much about Cancer, so that was part of the research. And another aha! moment. I remember those claws very well. And what it felt like to be clutched in them--the good and the bad. I am, if anything, more independent than I was when I was with him the first time. (Which, I am guessing, might make me that much more appealing.) And I did a couples chart too, and the interpretation basically said, over and over again: WTF are you thinking? That gave me pause, but also made me laugh. It said, straight out: There is nothing easy about this pairing. To which I responded: You think that is news to me?
I also looked at stats about second marriages, and some stuff about the particular problem he is dealing with in his marriage. It's a big one, and really, the odds are not good that the marriage will survive. The take-away message, for me--and I know this sounds selfish, but: Time is on my side. I guess my handle is apt, too: Genuine Sag. Trouble in love? I do research.
And, I want to say that though I don't consider myself to be a believer, Fishmagnetism, I have been known to pray in moments of extreme need. I've used the idea you mentioned--in moments of longing and pain--of giving him over to somebody else to take care of, at least for the time being. It is surprisingly helpful.
I feel, at the moment, quite centered, and quite sure of what my response will be the next time he reaches out to me, which I'm sure he will. He's gone kind of quiet the last few days, which is a bit of a relief, as well as a bit of a worry. I won't claim that it will go exactly as I like--he has a way of countering what I say that shakes me up and makes me doubt myself. But I also feel a little bit more IN myself than I have in awhile now, and that has to be good.
I also want to thank you, PiscesPiggy, for saying that reconnecting with your Sag helped. Maybe I can help in some way, even if it doesn't seem like I am. It felt to me, before, like if I didn't give him exactly what he wanted, then I wasn't helping. Now it seems to me that I can still help, if only by staying true to myself, and perhaps modeling what that means. At any rate, I feel much more able to deal with him from a place of generosity and care.
The main thing is that I am more prepared to be patient with this, and to consider the value of friendship in these circumstances. I think one of the main differences between him and me is our ability to live with gray. I can live with gray--seek it out, even--in other areas of life, but in my personal life it drives me crazy. I see now that he his buried in gray, mired in gray. Maybe I need to learn to live with that a little bit, and to have a little bit more empathy for people who are in a different stage in their life.
I already know it is true that once he decides that someone is his princess, he will do almost anything for her. It is precisely the memory of that that is causing so much trouble here! But maybe it's worth detaching, yet remaining hopeful that I might end up being that again for him.
Like Miss Dubois, I am grateful for the kindness of strangers.
Best wishes to you both.
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