Dont know if i should continue my relationship..
Well ive been thinking a lot lately,Ive been dating my BF on for a yr now,we are working things out again but im not sure if i really want too.I am 6 months pregnant and we've been through a lot during our yr.He use to be verbally abusive to me and just didnt fit the category of a MAN TYPE of guy you know.Now he is trying his best to be with me and i see him really trying but im not sure if i want too work it out due to the things we've been through.its one of those things that when i do let him go i miss him somewhat,maybe its the loneliness i feel not sure.i just need help on what i should do.i just dont what i want some times.please help me figure things out...thanks
Well Kateyez411, when you say hes working on things what does that mean exactly? Is he getting help for his abusive pattern? seeing a counselour or any kind of professional help? Is he aware of where this pattern came from and how to handle stressful situations that will most certainly come up when you have this baby? How long has it been since he has been this way towards you? I would look really closely at the facts....Is this the kind of behavior or environment you are going to nurture for the child coming? I just dont think he has changed his ways overnight. He may be on his best behavior so not to lose you or the potential of losing a chance at a family...but has the real issues been dealt with? Because when you bring a baby into the world it is blissful yes, but also stressful and if he has no skills on how to cope with the stress he may react this way again. Be careful and keep your eyes wide open. Abuse is nothing to ignore...that is a serious problem.
Also no that you can be just as lonely in a relationship as you can be out of one. If you are not open to recieving love from others you can feel very alone...Focus on any relationships that make you feel good about yourself..and take some time for yourself to take care of YOU. Become the love of your own life....what do you need for yourself today? What is your inner monolouge saying to you? Are you kind to yourself? Are you critical of yourself....I know for me I have attracted relationships in my life that were not the best for me and when I thought about it honestly I knew that I wasnt being very nice to myself at the time...Almost as if to say I dont deserve to be with someone who is going to treat me right....Some food for thought.
yes he is aware of his verbal abuse and ive seen change in that part.Maybe its due to him not wanting to loose me.Right now Im unemployed and i have small bills that he says he cant help me with because he has his own bills.It just put a strain on the relationship and he tells me that he wants to see me do better but yet doesn't like to hear my problems and he said that i chose this path.He thinks that i try to put my bills on him which i don't but i do expect him to help me more then just put up money for one bill due to my needs.I just dont see any use of being with him if he cant be a good provider.I feel that if im going to struggle i might as well struggle alone.to me; a man suppose to make a women feel secure as in everything being taken care of when a women cant do for herself.I dont depend on a man but i feel if im in a relationship then yes i should depend on him if i am in need.so i decided to be alone for a while until i got my life situated.I rather be stressed out alone then be stressed out in a relationship with him.
do you think i sound self-fish expecting things from a man while im in need?