Gemini & Fidelity
I am saggi with gemini rising and live with a gemini. Together 6 years. Not long ago partner got involved with a person in a religious sect and in the guise of "counselling" embarked on a four month flirtation during work, involving txts, e mails, lunches and exchanging photos. It all got out of hand and physical threats to my partner from the husband. It all came to a head at Christmas and there was a suicide bid by the husband. Awful! And frightening. But what hurt me was the way my partner treated me in those months - brutal intimacy, forgetting special anniversaries and not hearing when I said I had had a serious health scare. It was humiliating and painful. We are trying but I am having such trouble with trust and respect for him now and still have panic attacks and feel physically sick. I realise I was too trusting at that time and did not follow my instinct. I should have had more love for myself. But how do you even begin to rebuild something after that? I want this to work but am frightened to let the walls down again. Any advice? We are both trying hard.
Geminis are naughty. But they do not forget what's most important to life. Some people on this forum might already know what have happened to me recently. I am married for nearly 6 years but got flirty with a man I met at work for two weeks. speaking from a Gemini's point of view, not a single minute I wasn't accusing myself of doing what's wrong. I am getting a lot of help from people to get myself back to the rail. Please read the topic under Confused Gemini seeking wise advice in the forum if you wish to know more about what happened to me.
I might sound ridiculous for what I myself have done before. But if you both are trying hard to make your relationship work, I think your gemini would appreciate you for the rest of his life for giving him this one chance to correct the mistakes that he's made. I could imagine how hard it must be but if you can, please try to get more help from people around you, or online, to help you release the pressure on yourself, on this fidelity issue. If you feel that he is trying hard, I think he knew what he had done has hurt you deeply and he might really wish to amend this relationship and does not want to lose you.
Best wishes to you two.
YOU CAN KICK HIM TO THE CURB..QUICK !!
Hello Confused Gemini
Thank you so much for putting a Gemini point of view. You are very kind to reply so fully and I will read your earlier experiences as I am sure it will give me an insight into a gemini mind. I have half of one, it being my ascendent!
Your words brought great confort - I hope his mind is the same as yours - and your advice to seek help on the forum is good - I should have done it earlier instead of festering and getting into a tizz.
Good luck with your rebuilding and it will be nice to "meet" here sometimes. I shall look out for you! And thanks again
I have nearly done so. believe me!
You sound like a sensitive sweetie. I am so sorry and feel your pain because I too have lived it. Frankly, I am suprised you are still trying after "But what hurt me was the way my partner treated me in those months - brutal intimacy, forgetting special anniversaries and not hearing when I said I had had a serious health scare. It was humiliating and painful".
I hope he he really trying hard to make up for his cruelty. Remember leapards can't change their spots. If not, are you sure you need more of the same?
Thank you. Good advice. True about leopards - I shall watch my back!
my very best wishes to you
I don't believe Geminis are capable of fidelity. We crave change and excitement. I get bored too easily. Then if I am not in a new relationship I get depressed, overeat ,gain weight but I continue to work my ass off at my job.Idon't actually go seeking relationships, they just happen. My crabby clawed husband, will never let go, no matter how many times I am unfaithful. He says he just likes to look at me. GOD.
Of course we are capable of fidelity....I love to flirt and be flattered but I've never been unfaithful and wouldn't dream of cheating either. I just won't cross that point. Never ever.
Catsnake...you sound REALLY bored with your husband ! If you're not going to leave him...why not treat your relationship with your hubby as you would a new relationship? Just because you're married doesn't mean you should stop trying to entice your partner...you can still flirt and have fun! Being unfaithful will get boring after a while too....!!!
Hey, I am a Gemini.
I have been through the ringer in my life with relationships. I was faithful to my partners.
I no longer want an exclusive relationship EVER! No, worries about my partner being faithful any more. IT wasn't me the Gemini it was the partners. As soon as they start accusing me I know the jig is up. And that he has a guilty mind. And I no longer trust him any more.
Male or Female should not get involved with a Gemini if THEY have any self esteem issues or there controlling, it will NOT work. A Gemini has to give themselves freely. And need to know there partner will not wonder. If so the problems begin. Make a Gemini feel loved and cared for and have no doubt your Gemini will stay faithful. Don't accuse your Gemini, they will run for the hills. Now thats honesty.
Not a confused Gemini. I know whats important in life. I wish the partners I had knew that !!!!
A Gemini, at least this one can and has been faithful.
Hi. I'm a Libra
I'm seeing a Gemini who has commitment issues because he has been hurt before.
2 relationships where the women were unfaithful. The first twice; he forgave her the first time but not the second . The second one started seeing a friend of his . He knows his relationship with the second woman was troubled and half of it was his fault, it just hurt that she would do things the way she did . I feel his pain and it makes me angry that these 2 women could do this to him . I know the second woman and still can not figure out how she could hurt him like that knowing what the first had done .
I am being patient because I really do want this to work between us. I'm giving him the time he needs to deal with his issues . I do not push or expect anything from him. I will help him heal as much as I can , he has already learned he can trust me. I'm working on his self confidence and it is getting better. I know he is not perfect but the flaws in each of us helps make us who we are .
To me he is wonderful just the way he is and I do not want to change him . Any change he makes he will do for himself not for someone else .
I know Geminis are flirts and thats fine because we Libras can be as well .
We respect each other and do not try to hem each other in .
People who have issues with a geminis fidelity may want to look closely at the reason behind it .
Look deeply into yourself as well as your Gemini .
Being Libra I tend to look at both sides. Yes , even both sides of my Gemini's failed relationships .
Like I said , I know he's not perfect, but neither am I .
Oooh--Gemini--that's a huge risk right there in and of itself. All Gemini men I've dated were roving.
You take a big risk in every relationship you encounter....Leos are just as flirty ...I'm married to one! ....
Saggie please keep in mind that when Gemini and water are mixed that it is very confusing for Gems .As we do not mix well with water .This is why it is important to know the position of the planets as they can explain a lot of our behaviors .I am Gem and when neptune and Mercury was together I was literally in days of confusion and illiusions it was horrible and worst of all I had no one to help me through that time.You are with your marriage sign and usually it is the sag that will stray however if Gem do it is because we like Sag need a best friend and good sexual partner both side of us need attention .We are very mental and need that simulation. Ask your partner what is missing from the relationship if you truly desire to continue and make sure your partner is free to express the needs openly and honestly .
First let me say.
Gemini's are capable of fidelity and it has much more to do with their core moral values as in look at their father.
Secondely Saggi is not a water sign it is fire and fire and air do mix. Air signs are naturally attracted to fire as it makes for fiery passion.
If you have any rivals look at Aries as the Gemini craves this sign for its magnitude of strength , something they can be wobbly about as they have two voices talking to them all the time.
I knew a Gemini who had to pick betwen a Sag and an Aries , she picked Aries.
The other Gemini i knew, a male also picked an Aries I am not sure who the other was.
Both Aries passed away in their life times as this sign is burns hard, but neither Gemini would have had it any other way.
So for the poor Saggi , I say lok to leo and flatter them, they are much more snuggly and crave sobriety in a mate and letting you let them be the center of attention . They will look up to your intelligence and excellent ability to be a guide and teacher. I love gemini's as friends and I love to talk to them and laugh.
The caveat is they have to really know you forever and be mesmerized to want to give you both sides of their soul,but once given they are smitten and love like any other sign.
I have four Gemini's in my life. Two are my brother and dad, and two are two of my best friends. My brother is absolutely terrible with Fidelity. He's cheated on every single one of his girlfriends to date. The one he has right now, he seems to care for deeply and hasnt done anything...yet. My dad, I hope he doesn't cheat! Let's not think about that.
However, my two friends are completely honest and trustworthy, and I could never imagine them hurting anyone like that. One of my friends is in a three year relationship and hasn't looked in a man's direction since she got together with her boyfriend. The other is single but she has very strict moral values and would never cheat on anyone.
So...when it comes to something as serious as fidelity, you have to really look at the person's personality, not their star sign. What do you think their morals are? My friends have strong morals, my brother literally has none. I don't know any other gemini men except ones in my family to compare them to, but on this forum ive seen a topic on pretty much every star sign that has something to do with cheating. And it's usually in marriages.
Both my sun and my mars are in Gemini so I have had my fair share of commitment issues in the past, but in retrospect I noticed that it only happened with partners who tried to control me or clip my wings in some way. I was with a guy for 2 years and was completely faithful, we had an awesome relationship and I think it was due primarily to the fact that he was a Libra with Gemini rising so he craved the same amount of personal freedom and excitment in the relationship that I did, thus making us a very compatible, and somewhat unconventional couple. I will admit that it wasn't a deeply intimate relationship and it didn't feel like a soul mate connection, but it worked for us at the time and allowed me to prove to myself that I was capable of making a long-term commitment, something I had always worried might be impossible for me.
Generally speaking, and this may be compensated for by strong earth or water chart influences, most Geminis, especially if they also have mercury in Gemini, crave a mental connection more than an emotional one and this is the way they pursue intimacy in a relationship. I know that for me, there is nothing sexier than a passionate intellectual conversation with my partner... seriously, it makes me hot just thinking about it!! That said, I'm a bit conflicted with my venus being in cancer and my moon in capricorn!! It's almost like I crave emotional intimacy but I don't know how to acheive it and I'm scared to even attempt it because it goes against my natural Geminian tendency to intellectualize and rationalize my feelings.
Basically, Gemini's can be quite confusing and exasperating at times, especially to those whose charts are heavily influenced by capricorn, taurus and/or cancer, because of their dualistic nature, indecisiveness, grass is greener mentality and somewhat nasty habit of changing horses in the middle of the stream. They require a lot of patience and reassurance when it comes to commitment and "settling down" (to me just the thought of "settling" makes me cringe), but if you're able to nurture their insatiable curiosity and encourage their thirst for knowlege, change & excitement, most will be like putty in your hands and will commit with an almost childlike devotion.
Long story made short... Gemini's crave adventure and absolutely NEED change and excitement. They are not capable of living in a "mundane, boring or conventional" atmosphere for very long. And, most importantly, these desires are so deeply imbedded into their souls that if their partners fail to meet them and consistently maintain them in the relationship, THEY WILL FIND THEM ELSEWHERE. They almost can't help it, it's that important to them.
That said, when the "evil twin" starts to appear, try to focus on the positive characteristics of your Gemini and possibly how you could benefit or learn from their perspective of the world. For instance, instead of getting annoyed when your Gemini starts a new project for the third time this month because you know that they probably won't finish any of them completely, try to focus on their initial excitement and enthusiam that radiates within them during the visionary and planning stages. (It's not that we don't want to finish the things we've started, we're just not very good with details, delegation or execution, so most of the time we give up strictly because we don't know how to proceed past the visionary/idea phase). You could also take the opportunity to learn from your Gemini's ability to see both sides of any issue or the way they almost effortlessly relate to people from divergently different backgrounds, ethnicities, age groups and walks of life.
I admit we can be a pain in the rear sometimes, but we're not all flighty, philandering comitment-phobes here to take you on an emotional roller coaster ride! We can be tied down, you just have to be sneaky about it so we don't even realize that that's what's happening!! Make sense??
I hope this gives you a better insight into the complicated and often misunderstood world of the Gemini!
Well, I personally don't agree. With what you just wrote. I am a creature of habits and routines.
Actually, prefer it. I don't like surprise. I only like to make plans. No plans forget about it. I am extremely detailed.
My core personality is solid as concrete. No, changing mid stream, no fun till the job is done.
Wanna know about Gemini's there not all flakes or flighty. I am a Gemini.
Like Astrological Interpretation?
My Sun is in Gemini
My moon is in Aquarius
( Mercury conjunction Jupiter-I have a mind of a LAWYER.)
Mercury in Cancer
Venus in Taurus
Mars in Gemini
Jupiter in Cancer
Saturn in Pisces
Uranus in Virgo
Neptune in Scorpio
Pluto in Virgo
So, what does this tell you? Six full houses, six vacant.
Venus in Taurus- In love I am stead fast and loyal, especially with a warm demonstrative partner. I am very loyal, loving and down to earth.
Maybe if your Gem Gal or Gem Guy isn't faithful there not in love.
Check what there sign is in Venus. Perhaps it will shed light on the situtation.
Peace and Unity
Ps I know many people that are not faithful and not one of them is a Gemini!